A Second Chance: Awakenings
by Biff McLaughlin
Summary: AU. Sequel to "A Second Chance". Commander Kallian Arainai moves to Vigil's Keep to rebuild the order. As the birth of their child nears, tragedy strikes, threatening what they have built together.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** Welcome readers! It has taken me quite some time to get this first chapter written and I could have made it even longer, but this break seemed reasonable. And in truth I have been missing the FF community! I actually wrestled for a while with the title and settled on this somewhat blasé one in the end, but just in case you're curious, 'Awakenings' is plural for a reason...(evil giggle). If you've been following my series, you'll note the addition of journal entries in this installment. These entries will always be in italics with the Warden's signature at the end, to distinguish them from dreams or memories.

As always, I would love some feedback. What works, what doesn't, are there holes in the story, what do you like/hate, did I miss any typos, et cetera. Constructive criticism is always welcome! Cheers, Biff.

* * *

_27 Kingsway, 9:30_

_We leave for Soldier's Peak tomorrow. Avernus sent a letter asking me to come, but it arrived just before our wedding and in the excitement around the wedding and then our honeymoon, I did not read it until after Alistair's coronation. The crate that came with his letter? Jars of raspberry jam, of all things, from Levi. This is the recipe that Warden Commander Gaspar Asturian was rumored to have made for the elven princess with whom he was infatuated. Something sweet to keep our marriage sweet, the note read, and the jam is fantastic. Levi's wife found the recipe in the kitchens and has apparently been selling it with great success. Another idea for generating income at Vigil's Keep, perhaps._

_Avernus believes he is at the end of his life and wishes to hand over his research. I hope to find out what affect the taint will have on the babe I carry, something I have been trying not to think about, and what the potion I drank will do to me in the long run. However, my ultimate hope is that he has found a way to minimize the bad side effects of the joining, perhaps even a way to minimize deaths during the ceremony. Dare I hope that one's Calling might be postponed or better, never come? I imagine the potion gives warriors and mages skills similar to the ones I now have, but the notes I took with me so long ago were badly damaged and have continued to deteriorate._

_A missive has come from Weisshaupt at last. First Warden Ronan has confirmed me as Warden Commander and asked me to arrange a visit from him as soon as I am settled in Amaranthine. I am also to report to him regularly. That is easy enough, but the visit has me nervous. All these months, it's just been Alistair and I and our friends, and now everything has changed. The First Warden will no doubt have questions for me, the first of our order to kill an archdemon and live._

_~KA_

8 Harvestmere, 9:30

Soldier's Peak loomed against dark clouds, an intimidating and towering keep of blue-grey stone, its foundations carved out of the mountain on which it was perched. Low lying clouds clung to its upper reaches, a heavy mist swirled about the keep's grounds, and snow had started to fall. It was the picture of abject gloominess, made even more so by the fact that a large funeral pyre was slowly burning out in the courtyard. Dark smoke swirled upward in a fat column until it was pulled away on the cold breeze blowing in from the west.

Warden Commander Kallian Arainai stood on the bridge that spanned the gap between the keep and the Mage's Tower, her cloak pulled tightly around her upper body while the lower reaches of it flapped wildly in the wind. Kallian stared down at the pyre, trying to sort herself out. She felt unreasonably angry about the things she had been able to control but didn't, such as reading Avernus' the letter when it arrived, and the things she truly hadn't been able to control, like the weather, which had slowed them down.

It had been a hard journey, taking ten days when they had thought they could make it in seven, rains turning the roads into muddy trenches most of the way. They had started out with two wagons and four oxen, four of Alistair's soldiers, Petra and horses for everyone. The plan had been to stop at Vigil's Keep to drop off their wagons, which were loaded with personal effects, wedding gifts, and a host of other supplies they would need, but they had to abandon that notion. The road had been flooded and it seemed easier to simply continue on to the city of Amaranthine itself. She made the decision to keep going reluctantly; feeling the pull of other Grey Wardens in the area was a new and rather exciting sensation and she could hardly wait to meet them. Continue they did, however, leaving two guards behind with the wagons at an inn on the outskirts of town with a stable large enough to house their animals and wagons. She had carried on to Soldier's Peak with the remaining soldiers, Petra, Zevran and Lucius.

The closer they got, the more she began to feel it, a vague sense of impending loss unlike any she had ever felt before. Kallian realized what it was; she was sensing the ancient Warden mage, Avernus, and he was dying. She wasn't feeling it as she would the loss of a close personal friend or family member; she had barely known the man and had been sickened by his research when she first met him. Losing a Warden Brother was different; it was as though she could feel his life force ebbing away and the connection between them made her feel it deeply. She had pressed them on and reached out to Avernus, trying to will him to understand that she was almost there, and she knew, somehow, that he was waiting. By the time they had finally made it to Soldier's Peak, she had had about half an hour to talk with Avernus before he died.

When she asked about her child, Avernus had told her where to find historical documents on the very matter of Wardens having children. Zevran had found it and they had read over it later. While it was impossible for two Wardens to have a child, children _had_ been born to couples with one Warden parent. In all the cases investigated, it was reported that the children were born without the taint. Not all survived birth, but the mortality rate was no higher than that of normal children. The reasons were typical as well; stillbirth, infant illness, accidental death. Trying to ignore the general risks of pregnancy, Kallian took comfort in this news.

Avernus' last coherent comment to her before he died was promising, if vague. "The potion will give you more time." He had then sputtered a few more words, taken one last wheezy breath and passed away. The sense of loss she'd been feeling intensified and she wept for him. She was eventually able to shake the sadness and made arrangements for a pyre, but she had neglected herself in the process and was tired and hungry as a result.

Zevran Arainai watched his wife from the doorway to the keep, standing in the shadows, waiting. He tried to ignore the twisting in his gut caused by seeing her standing so close to the edge of the bridge. Levi and his brothers had built a sturdy railing along both sides, but the wind could be quite treacherous up this high and she looked as though she might blow away at any moment. Finally, she pulled herself out of her reverie and turned toward him. He could see now that she was clutching a large tome to her chest. Avernus' research, no doubt.

Seeing him, she smiled and hurried along the bridge, leaning into the wind. As she approached him, he pushed the door open and ushered her in, bolting the door behind them. He pulled her into an embrace and rubbed his hands up and down her back to warm her.

"Are you all right, amata?" They had both been up most of the night discussing her conversation with Avernus and he was tired, but she looked positively peaked.

"I will be. I just wish I could have talked to him more. This," she looked down at the book she carried "is written in Tevinter."

He took the book from her hands and opened it, scanning the first few pages. He noticed the worried look on her face. "What is it?"

She sighed. "It's his research, and being written in Tevinter, it only makes sense to have a mage look at it. But Avernus was a blood mage. This is _all_ blood magic. I can't ask Petra to look at it and I certainly can't go to the Circle for help. I think I'd give anything to run into an apostate or, Maker help me, a maleficar, right now." She rubbed her forehead, looking back to the door. "Maybe we should search his lab, see if there's anything else to be found."

Zevran considered her pale complexion and made a decision, shaking his head sharply. "No, we will not do this now. You are exhausted and have not eaten for quite some time. You must eat, have your tea and rest for a bit. Later, we will search his lab and quarters to see if there is anything to find, yes?"

Kallian smiled, knowing better than to argue with him. Once Zevran had made up his mind about something, especially where her health was concerned, he was resolved. Nodding, she let him lead her down to the kitchen. The room smelled of fresh bread and cinnamon. Levi's wife, Moira, was baking and smiled warmly at them as they entered. Petra reached for the tea she'd made for Kallian and poured a cup for the Warden, nodding to the table where a pot of porridge sat with a basket of fresh bread and a jar of jam. Zevran pointed to a bench and began to dish out breakfast for them both. Once he had placed food in front of her, he leaned back, folded his arms over his chest and arched an eyebrow at her.

"Si, mio signore e padrone," she murmured with a smirk as she sipped her tea.

Zevran smiled back at her and winked. Running a hand over her head, he sat and began to eat his breakfast.

xXx

10 Harvestmere, 9:30

Kallian packed the last of Avernus' books into a crate on the floor and knocked the lid into place. They had found numerous historical texts, two centuries worth of Avernus' notes, all written in Tevinter, and a rather large stash of potions. He had a sizeable collection of stamina, mana, and health draughts, and numerous poisons. They had also found a crate of phials filled with a thick, shimmering, red-black substance that looked familiar to Kallian. The crate was dated three months earlier with a notation that the box contained 100 phials for 100 Joining ceremonies, to be mixed as per the instructions inside. The instructions were written in Tevinter. She was frustrated, but she knew there was no point in dwelling on the matter. Sooner or later, she would find a way to translate Avernus' notes and then she could begin recruiting new Wardens.

She stood and stretched her back, rolled her shoulders and tipped her head from side to side to work the kinks out of her neck. Turning slowly, she surveyed the lab. It had long since been cleared of the remains of the Wardens Avernus had experimented upon so very long ago, all the hanging cages he had were gone, and the room looked harmless compared to the first time she'd seen it. Satisfied that everything was in order, she picked up the crate she'd packed and headed down to the great hall where they were gathering the things they would take with them. They would be leaving the following morning. With no further reason to stay, Kallian was anxious to return to Amaranthine to settle into her roles there. Satinalia was just over three weeks away and she hoped that celebrating the occasion with the locals might start things off on the right foot.

xXx

14 Harvestmere, 9:30

The rains had abated considerably, making the journey from Soldier's Peak less difficult. The party was able to find small inns along the way and when they couldn't, an abandoned barn or house sufficed. They had stopped for the night at a small guest house along the north coast, within two days of the city of Amaranthine. After a delicious meal and a long chat by the fire, they turned in for the night.

In the wee hours of the morning, as dawn's first light began to penetrate the night skies, Zevran awoke to Kallian's screams. One of her arms slammed into his chest, momentarily knocking the wind out of him, and as he tried to catch his breath, he heard someone pound on the door to their room. He struggled to untangle himself from their bed sheets as Kallian's screams and thrashing intensified, and in a flash of light the door flew open. Petra rushed in, dressed only in a night shift, followed closely behind by Stephan and Aiden, Alistair's soldiers. Shaking sparks from her fingers, Petra fired a small, harmless bolt at Kallian's foot, shocking the young woman awake. Kallian scrambled backwards, trying to escape whatever demons had plagued her dreams, her eyes searching the room as she sobbed into the fistful of bed sheets she clutched to her mouth. Zevran had fallen out of bed, almost landing on Lucius, and was standing slowly, hands out in front of him, while the others stared at Kallian. Lucius growled, his massive head swinging back and forth as he surveyed the room. Seeing nothing, he sat and whined.

"Kalli?" Zevran asked slowly. "Are you awake?"

She nodded, whimpering as she continued to search the room, her body shaking. Aiden held out his lantern to light the corners of the room, trying to find what it was she was seeking. This room was identical to the one he shared with Stephan and what he had seen of Petra's room; there was nothing to be seen beyond its meager furnishings and the clothing, armor and supplies scattered about the room.

"You were dreaming." Zevran maintained a soft tone, crawling back onto the bed. "What did you dream?"

Kallian was breathing heavily, the wild look in her eye slowly giving way to fear, and her hands drifted to her belly, clutching at her night shift. Zevran shot a look at Petra, fearful something was wrong with their child. The mage slowly reached out for Kallian's leg and held her foot for a moment, her hand glowing with magic. After a moment she shrugged.

"The child is fine," she declared. "I can sense nothing physically wrong with her. Kallian, what is it?"

"Darkspawn…something terrible…" Kallian launched herself off the bed and began rushing about the room looking for her clothes. Oblivious to the presence of the two soldiers, she pulled off her shift and began to pull on her small clothes and the padded cotton leggings and tunic she wore under her armor.

A chill ran through Zevran as he pulled on his own clothing. Something he could not comprehend was happening, but it felt all too familiar and it did not bode well. "Kalli, what are you doing? It is still dark out."

She kept gathering her armor and weapons, as though she hadn't heard him.

Zevran reached out and grabbed her elbows, giving her arms a gentle tug in an effort to focus her attention on him. "Kallian! Please, stop and breathe, mia cara. Tell us what it is that has you so distressed."

"We need to leave, to get to Vigil's Keep as soon as possible. Something…"

Kallian paused and took a few deep breaths, slowly becoming more aware of her surroundings. She blushed upon seeing the two soldiers standing in the doorway of their room, realizing they had seen her naked, but it hardly mattered. She dropped her things onto their bed.

"I dreamt of darkspawn and it felt…I felt as though a part of me was being ripped out, Zev." Moisture was building in her eyes and a touch of hysteria crept into her voice. "It's the Orlesian Wardens, they are in danger, that must be it. It's…it's like what I felt in the tunnels of Soldier's Peak, but I feel fear and…I-I cannot explain it, but I cannot stay here, we must go. _Please_."

The others looked at each other, to Zevran and back to Kallian. Petra nodded and went to her room.

Stephan bowed slightly. "As you wish, Commander. We will be ready shortly." He and Aiden disappeared down the hallway.

"Zev, I'm…scared. This…" she was tapping a finger on her chest "this isn't right. Maker's breath, maybe this wasn't such a great idea after all, this commander business. I am totally panicking right now, the others must think I'm crazy…Some commander I am." She finished with a nervous giggle and bit her lip.

Zevran went to Kallian and pulled her into an embrace, breathing shushing sounds by her ear. He held her until he could feel her relaxing and pulled away to look her in the eye.

"This is new, as it was when you were first recruited. Look how that turned out, rather well, yes?" He smiled and brushed her cheeks dry. "You are not, however, the young and inexperienced girl you were then. Whatever this is, you will face it and you will figure out a way to deal with it, hmm?"

She nodded slowly, releasing her lip. "You're right. Thank you, Zev." Throwing her arms around him for another hug, she whispered "What would I ever do without you?"

He chuckled. "Well, let us hope you never have to find out, hmm? Come, let us pack and be on our way. We are lucky this place was empty. I'll settle our bill on the way out and hope the man doesn't charge us extra for waking him up this early."

xXx

_17 Harvestmere, 9:30_

_We have arrived in Amaranthine and been reunited with the rest of our party. A great unease and much grief weighs heavily upon me and I have no idea what exactly we will find at Vigil's Keep, but I know the Orlesians are gone. The pull I could feel as we passed by late last month has weakened daily. I am devastated._

_A young recruit named Mhairi apparently arrived here four days ago and has been waiting for our return. She is to accompany us to Vigil's Keep, but reports that nothing was amiss when she left. All the same, until we know what the situation is, we will leave the bulk of our things here with either Stephan or Aiden and send for it later._

_We had to fight off small pockets of darkspawn more frequently as we neared the city, and have heard rumours that stray bands of them are terrorizing the countryside. I am not sure what to make of this but I am too exhausted to think on it and Zevran has once again ordered me to drink my tea and get to bed._

_~KA_

18 Harvestmere, 9:30

Kallian raised her hand and the rest of their party stopped. Zevran pulled his horse close to hers, noting her eyes were wet. He could see the keep in the distance, roughly another half hour away, perhaps.

"What is it, mia cara?"

She wiped her eyes, taking a few deep breaths. "The Wardens are gone. I have been trying to…" Kallian swallowed hard and shook her head. "I can only sense darkspawn."

Taking a spyglass from a pouch attached to her saddle, she pulled it open and used it to look at Vigil's Keep. She used the opportunity to bring her emotions back under control. The keep, she noted, was nestled into the side of a mountain. While this made entering the keep from the front the only way in, that was also very likely the only way out unless the keep had tunnels leading elsewhere. She hoped this increased their odds of finding survivors.

"Hmm. I _think_ the front gates are open, but it's difficult to tell from this distance. However, I can tell you not one chimney is smoking. Odd that it is late afternoon on a chill Harvestmere day and not a single fire is lit. "

Zevran nodded. "Indeed, one would expect the kitchen fires to be burning all day long with a dozen Grey Wardens in residence."

"I should have come here first," Kallian mumbled, collapsing the looking glass and putting it away.

Zevran sighed. "You cannot save the world, tesora."

"Ugh, I know. I just…" she shook her head and waved a hand at nothing in particular. "Damnit, I was really hoping this would be an adventure without darkspawn. Okay, so we do what we always do."

Kallian slid off her horse and looked at her travelling companions.

"I think we have a problem. Vigil's Keep looks a bit too quiet at the moment and I…well, I have reason to believe that the Orlesian Wardens have met with foul play.

I think it would be wise of us to prepare in that barn I can see down the road. We will leave our horses there, gather what we need to investigate the situation at the keep and then go the rest of the way on foot." She turned to the three soldiers.

"Gentlemen, I know you fought alongside King Alistair and I during the siege on Denerim, but this bears repeating. Be careful not to get any darkspawn blood in your mouth or eyes. If you are tainted…" she pursed her lips and shook her head.

"Aye, Commander," Stephan replied. The others nodded their understanding.

"Lucius, protect Petra."

The hound woofed and stood at attention beside Petra's horse.

"Good boy. Okay, let's get moving. We only have a couple of hours' worth of light at best."

Kallian mounted her horse and set off at a gallop, pushing her fear back to focus on her duty.

xXx

Even though Kallian knew the situation was bad, she had allowed herself to hope that it wasn't, that she was wrong. Her hope diminished the closer they got to the keep and the sensation of nearby darkspawn made her skin crawl. They followed the road to the main gates, passing through a barricade of pole trees that had been sharpened into spikes and driven into the ground at an angle. Kallian made note of everything along the way; a windmill and watchtower on the left, then a few houses with chicken coops and gardens, another house on the right with fields of barley and hops.

The keep's curtain wall housed the main gate and angled off to either side before the ground eventually rose sharply upwards. Any attempt to swarm the keep from the other side of the mountain would end badly for the invaders, unless they were excellent mountain climbers. With several wall towers visible, she thought it seemed highly unlikely the keep could be taken by surprise. She couldn't understand how the Wardens had been overcome by darkspawn. As the group of them pondered this mystery, a soldier came running out the front gate, yelling for help, a small group of darkspawn on his heels.

They dispatched with the darkspawn quickly and after Petra and Kallian examined the man to ensure he hadn't been tainted, they asked the soldier a few questions and then let him go. He mentioned that a mage had been behind him, unsure if the man was a Warden, and Kallian's mood had lifted, if only a bit. From that point on, everything seemed all too familiar to her and it was as though she were back on the road, fighting the Blight.

Upon entering the first bailey, which contained several houses, they came across small groups of darkspawn fighting with soldiers, four in total. After helping kill the enemy, Kallian sent the soldiers to defend the main gates before leading her group forward. A flight of wooden stairs led up to the inner gates, which opened into a second bailey. Mhairi explained that this area contained homes for many of the keep's staff, entrances to its basements and dungeons, an outdoor smithy and other merchant stalls. As they explored the area, they were attacked by more darkspawn and saved another soldier. They took a few minutes to help him with the four injured comrades he had been protecting, supplying bandages and potions, and then rushed to the aid of a merchant who was fighting darkspawn with nothing more than his fists. He agreed to seek refuge with the others and Kallian finally found herself staring up a flight of stairs at a portcullis. Kallian made eye contact with each member of her group, nodded sharply and climbed up into the keep.

xXx

_More darkspawn. I hate the bloody darkspawn_, Kallian complained to herself. She was exhausted and becoming more and more irritable with every step. When they found they couldn't reach the lever that would open the inner portcullis, she had screamed with rage. Her mood quickly turned, however, when they found a door they could open and rushed in to discover a tall blond man dressed in Tevinter robes, surrounded by bodies, setting fire to a hurlock. The beast fell to the floor.

Kallian skidded to a halt and stared. "_Anders?_"

The man whipped around, shaking flames from his fingers. "I didn't do it!"

He shot a quick glance back over his shoulder to make sure the beast was down and turned back to face Kallian. "Hey! I know _you_. You're looking much better now than you did the last time I saw you, I'll give you that."

"This is Anders?" Zevran asked, stepping forward.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Anders, this is my husband, Zevran. Zev, this is Anders."

Anders smiled broadly. "It's a pleasure to meet you. Congratulations, too. Marriage, a baby on the way…"

Zevran stepped forward, his arm extended. Gripping Anders' arm, he leaned in and spoke softly. "I must thank you, Anders, for what you did to assist my wife during the battle. She could have died that night and I owe you debt of gratitude for all that you did to save her life."

"Um, Anders?" Kallian's voice cut into the silence that followed as the two men moved apart.

"Yes, my lady?"

"Why are there dead Templars in my keep?" _My keep_, she thought to herself, wondering when she had started to think of it that way. _This is my bloody house and it's crawling with darkspawn filth. _She rolled her shoulders.

"Oh, um…Don't get me wrong, I'm not sorry they're dead – Biff there made the funniest gurgling noise when he went down – but I didn't…the darkspawn…Oh, what difference does it make?" Anders shrugged. "They found me in the Bannorn and were taking me to Aeonar."

Mhairi gasped. "You're an apostate?"

Anders smiled, taking a moment to appreciate how the young woman's armor clung to her figure. "_You_ weren't here when we arrived. I'm sure I'd remember…"

"_Anders,_" Kallian cut in. "I could really use your help here."

The mage turned his attention back to Kallian. "Of course. I'll help you now, and you can...ah...decide what to do with me later."

"It's a deal." She knew exactly what she'd do with him when this was over; conscript him and hope he wouldn't take off on her.

"Everyone, this is Anders. Anders, you know Petra, this is Mhairi, Lucius, Stephan, Marcus and Thomas." She waited for everyone to greet their new team member.

"Right, there are more of these darkspawn bastards inside and I want them out of my keep."

xXx

Kallian's ears were ringing and she lay on her back, staring at the sky above, trying to remember what had happened. A full moon and more stars than she could have imagined existed shone down on her. _Where am I?_ She took a deep breath and it came back to her. They had finally reached the lever that opened the inner portcullis and no sooner had they done so, a group of darkspawn rushed out and a dwarf appeared on the opposite side of the yard, taunting them. And then there had been an explosion unlike any she'd ever felt before and the force of it had thrown her back. _Okay, okay. I can feel my fingers and toes. My head…_

"Tesora?" Zevran's face appeared above her. "Are you all right?"

She reached for his hand and let him help her stand, touching the back of her head. "Umm…I cracked my head, my ears are ringing, but I think I'm okay. What in Thedas was _that_?" She thought she might be shouting.

Zevran shrugged. "Nothing I have ever seen." He was shouting, too.

Stephan stood, jamming a finger in one ear and wiggling it furiously as if that would help. "I think we're okay."

The others were standing and checking themselves. Petra came to Kallian's side and began to examine her. Lucius had his head low to the ground, rubbing his ear with one of his feet.

"Anders," Petra called out. "Kallian, you should sit down. You've got a fractured skull. Nothing too serious, but we should heal it now. Anders is better with bones than I am."

"Our child…" Kallian started.

Petra smile and nodded. "Fine." She leaned forward and lowered her voice so only Kallian and Zevran could hear her. "The spirit is fading, getting weaker by the day, but it is still with you."

This was a relief to them both, but only served to remind them that Kallian had to be more careful now than ever before. Thomas brought a barrel over and Kallian sat down.

"Ouch, I think I cracked my ass, too."

Anders appeared at her side. "Perhaps we'll let Petra look at that, hmm? I wouldn't want your husband to get the wrong idea about me. Petra, if you could manage any pain she might have? Zevran, please hold your wife steady."

"Please, my friends call me Zev." Zevran stood behind Kallian, his hands on her shoulders.

"Why thank you, Zev, that's kind of you." Anders put his hand at the back of Kallian's head.

After a moment of tingling, she felt the familiar and uncomfortable feeling of bone knitting itself back together. Skull fractures weren't as painful to heal as actual broken bones, but such an injury always made her feel quite ill. Her head and rear end stopped aching, but the urge to vomit overcame her and she bent over, barely missing Anders' boots.

"Oh, well… okay, that sometimes happens and you _are_ pregnant. Taking anything for the sickness?"

Another wave of magic flooded her body and she felt better. "Nothing I can take right now, but I think I'll be fine."

She stood and tested her balance, listened to the noises coming from the keep, and let herself feel the taint of the darkspawn around them. Feeling rejuvenated, she nodded and led her team further into the keep.


	2. This is Like the Old Days

**This is Like the Old Days**

18 Harvestmere, 9:30

"What do you mean you changed your mind? It hasn't even been a month!" Kallian shouted as she skipped around and over darkspawn corpses to get across the room to greet Oghren.

The dwarf grunted as she hugged him. "Well, I looked up Felsi and we got to drinking and I told her I was a Warden recruit. You know, to look good. That got her real excited, hehe, so we went back to her place and made the double-backed…"

"Oh, um…that's okay, Oghren, I can fill in the blanks myself." Kallian lowered her voice. "You know there are risks involved in this, Oghren."

"Aye, lass, but you know me. I need to kill things and when in the Stone will I get to do that working in Denerim? That little pike twirler doesn't need a berserker, but I figured you do and apparently I was right." He waved his hand around the room, ample evidence proving his point.

She bit her lip, wondering if Oghren would survive the Joining. He put his arm up on the handle of his axe and leaned forward, his low voice bringing with it the distinct stench of ale.

"I know what yer thinkin'. You think I don't know the risks? I'm from Orzammar, kid. We all know about the Calling and the Wardens you see going into the Deep Roads never to return aren't old men and women. You Wardens think you've got all these secrets, but that nug was let out o' the bag a long time ago."

She let out a chuckle and nodded. She was here to rebuild the order, after all, and wasn't about to turn down capable warriors who were volunteering. "Okay, Oghren."

Zevran had joined them and clapped a hand on Oghren's shoulder. The dwarf returned the gesture as he gripped Zevran's arm.

"Nice to see ya, nug rutter."

"Truly, I am happy to smell you. This is like the old days, yes?"

Kallian snorted. "_The old days._ It was two bloody months ago."

Lucius barked and jumped around them, happily snapping up the dried meat Oghren produced from a pocket.

"He was here when I left. I can't believe the Wardens didn't kick him out," Mhairi muttered as the rest of the group approached them.

"Hey, if it isn't the recruit with the great rack." Oghren shot back with a smile.

"Yes, a prize for the Wardens to be sure."

"I know, I know, too good to be true, right? Hey, who's the mage, yer boyfriend? Should we leave you two alone?"

"Wow, a dwarf who smells like a brewery. You never see that _aaanywhere_," Anders rolled his eyes, nudging Mhairi with his elbow.

"Hmm. A mage comedian. I thought those normally died young."

Kallian cleared her throat. "I will have you know that this crude and smelly dwarf fought by my side through the Deep Roads, across Ferelden and during the final battle against the darkspawn."

As she spoke, the Denerim soldiers in their midst greeted Oghren, recognizing him from the battle.

Mhairi looked appropriately contrite. "I am sorry, Commander, I…"

Kallian smiled. "I recruit all kinds, Mhairi. Okay, so we have an additional recruit, which is good, but we still have unwelcome guests and hopefully more survivors to rescue. If we're all ready?"

She looked around the group to find everyone nodding. "All right, let's go."

xXx

"Mhairi, I am so sorry." Kallian looked down at the warrior as she closed her friend Rowland's eyes and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Thank you, Commander. He would have made a brave Warden." Mhairi quickly wiped her face and slipped her gauntlets back on as she stood.

"He said talking darkspawn," Zevran murmured.

"Yeah, I was hoping that was my imagination." Kallian thought back to the dream she'd had when they stayed at Teagan's cottage. If the talking _darkspawn_ existed…She shook her head.

"I have a bad feeling about this," she grumbled as she led the group forward.

xXx

19 Harvestmere, 9:30

Within the hour, Kallian's apprehension was proven quite valid, much to her disappointment. They had fought their way through more darkspawn ranks, liberated more survivors and then found themselves on the ramparts that ran along the mountain backing the keep. Kallian had eased them out and along the wall, surprised to find it was morning, and peered around the corner just in time to see a soldier being pushed off the rampart by a hurlock. The beast then turned, _speaking_, to face another human who was on his knees, a second hurlock behind him with a blade to his throat. Kallian thought she might be sick again.

"Be taking this one gently. We are wishing no more death than is necessary."

The man on the ground was brave, Kallian thought, as he replied "Necessary? As if your kind has ever done anything else."

"You are thinking you know of our kind, human? It is understandable, but that will soon be changed."

"Others will come, creature. They will stop you," the man replied.

Kallian stepped out from around the corner, followed closely by her companions. The darkspawn were clearly outnumbered, having only one additional hurlock and genlock on the ramparts. The apparent leader turned to face them.

"It seems your words be true, more than you are guessing," he said as he walked toward them.

_It has paint on its face and a swath of purple cloth around its shoulders_, Kallian thought. _And it is talking._

Anders sounded absolutely delighted to be a witness to this. "It really _is_ talking!"

"Well let's shut it up already!" Oghren growled.

"Commander…" their captive began. Kallian assumed he must be Varel.

The hurlock pointed at her. "Capture the Grey Warden. These others, they may be killed."

Anders acted first, firing a ball of flame at the head of the hurlock holding Varel. It was a risky move, but the beast dropped its weapon and staggered back, falling down as it tried to put out the flames on its head and shoulders. As Kallian and the others began fighting the darkspawn, Varel grabbed the sword at his knees and joined them.

With ten well-armed, skilled and determined allies fighting against the three remaining darkspawn, they were quickly put down, although the leader was particularly tough. Kallian found herself bent over and on the verge of vomiting on Varel's boots when the fight was over. Petra was at her side, casting a healing spell.

"Commander, are you all right?"

She laughed. "This from the man who was very nearly decapitated a few moments ago?" She stood up straight. "Thank you, Petra. I am nearly three months with child and I am normally able to keep the morning sickness under control, but for some reason, darkspawn just set me off."

She held out her arm. "Ah…Seneschal Varel, I presume?"

"Yes, Commander." Varel replied, gripping her arm.

"Please, call me Kallian. I…did you hear that?"

Kallian began walking along the ramparts toward the front of the keep, until they had a clear view over the baileys and the main gates. Varel squinted at the hill approaching the keep.

"Hmm, soldiers on the road. It seems we have more company. Hopefully they're more hospitable than our previous guests. Come this way, we can get down here."

Varel led them to a nearby door and down a circular staircase that took them to the keep's main entrance hall and outside to the lower bailey. Some of the soldiers who had been stationed at the main gates met them.

"Commander, it's King Alistair." The man barely had time to draw another breath before Alistair and his retinue rode through the gates.

"Oh great," Kallian groaned as she spotted Ser Rylock at Alistair's side. "What in the Maker's name is she doing here?"

She pulled her helm and gauntlets off, handing them to the soldier. "If you could be so kind, ser…?"

"Yes, Commander. My name is Daveth."

"Really? That takes me back. A Warden recruit I once knew," she explained as she lowered herself to one knee and bowed her head.

The others followed suit, Mhairi whispering "King Alistair" with such awe Kallian nearly laughed out loud.

Dismounting, the King pulled his own helm and gauntlets off, surveying the grounds. The others with him dismounted as well and stood at attention beside their horses. Rylock had spotted Anders and it looked as though she had to use every ounce of her energy to not kill him then and there.

"Looks like I arrived a bit late. Too bad, I rather miss the whole darkspawn killing thing."

Alistair sounded jovial, but his eyes betrayed a deep concern. He looked tired and Kallian knew instinctively that he had suffered as she had.

"I'd wanted to come and give the Wardens a formal welcome, but I…well, I certainly was not expecting this." He reached down to take Kallian's hand and helped her up, waving to the rest of the group to stand.

"What's the situation, Sister?"

Kallian planted a smile upon her face. "Oh, you know, darkspawn seem to enjoy my company. In truth, Alistair, I do not know. Perhaps the seneschal can enlighten us."

"What darkspawn remained have fled, your majesty. The Grey Wardens who arrived from Orlais appear to be either dead or…missing."

"Missing? As in taken by the darkspawn? Do they even do that?"

Kallian shrugged while Varel spoke. "I do not know, sire, I only know that I cannot account for all the Grey Wardens."

"I see. At least the Hero of Ferelden is still here and alive. That's something, right? Hello Zev, Petra."

"Pfft. We have suffered heavy losses, Alistair, but we are all right." She motioned with her hand and they stepped away from the group.

"This makes things quite difficult."

"That's a bit of an understatement. You're getting good at that."

"You know, we were at a guest house northwest of Amaranthine when I felt it, just before dawn."

Alistair's head bobbed up and down. "Yes, the fourteenth. I know. It was…"

"Very disturbing," Kallian finished his thought. "The closer we got…I just knew it was a lost cause. If I could have…"

Alistair dropped a hand on her shoulder. "Don't. You cannot blame yourself for this. Any of it. I won't hear it."

She smiled weakly. "Okay."

"You have quite the task ahead of you," he said, leading her back to the others. "Really, I'd like to help you fight the darkspawn, but you're on your own for the moment."

Oghren grunted. "Hey, what am I, chopped nug livers?"

Anders laughed. "From the smell, that's not a bad guess."

Rylock couldn't contain herself any longer. "King Alistair! Beware, your majesty. This man is a dangerous criminal."

"Oh, the dwarf is a bit of an ass, but I wouldn't go that…"

"She means me," Anders offered, hanging his head.

Rylock pointed at him, as if to be sure everyone knew of whom she was speaking. "This is an apostate we were in the process of bringing back to the Circle to face justice."

"Oh please," the mage scoffed. "The things you people know about justice would fit into a thimble. I'll just escape again anyway."

"Never! I'll see you hanged for what you've done here, _murderer_."

"Murderer? But those templars were…oh what's the use, you won't believe me anyway."

Alistair and Kallian were watching each other during this exchange, communicating through subtle changes in their facial expressions. By the spark of anger in her eyes and the set of her jaw, he knew she had made up her mind.

Alistair nodded. "Well. It seems there isn't much to say. Unless…_you_ have something to add Commander?"

"I do. I hereby conscript this mage into the Grey Wardens."

Anders paled slightly. Rylock was outraged.

"What? Never!"

Kallian stepped forward, raising her voice. "It is rather presumptuous of you to assume you know _anything_ about what has happened here, Ser Rylock, and I will not have you speak to me or my people this way on our lands. I have lost twelve Warden brothers and who knows how many soldiers and staff, I am tired, hungry and pretty bloody upset right now, so don't you _dare_ push me." She leaned forward and jabbed a finger at Rylock for emphasis.

"I found this mage killing the very darkspawn who killed your templars and he has fought by our side since. I have conscripted him. He is a Grey Warden recruit and as much as you may hate that fact, there isn't a damn thing you can do about it because the Chantry does not have control over the Grey Wardens."

Straightening up again, Kallian cleared her throat and smoothed her hair back, tucking stray strands behind her ears. The silence dragged on for a moment longer before Alistair blinked and coughed.

"Well. The Grey Wardens do still retain the Right of Conscription. I must allow it." His tone of voice and the look he shot Rylock ended the conversation.

"If…if your majesty feels it is best," Rylock stammered, turning back to her horse.

Oghren laughed, punching Anders on the arm. "Ha! Way to go, kid. Welcome aboard!"

"Me, a Grey Warden? Ah…I guess that'll work…"

"Congratulations, ser mage. I look forward to fighting at your side," Mhairi offered.

Anders began to flirt with the soldier. Kallian rolled her eyes. _Here I go all over again_, she thought with a smile. Alistair caught her expression and laughed.

"If you've got everything under control, I will need to take my leave."

Varel nodded. "I believe the estate has been secured, yes. We have suffered losses, but the darkspawn are gone and there are survivors."

He turned to Kallian. "I am most grateful for your timely arrival, Commander. It is my duty to aid you in ruling the lands of Amaranthine."

"You are welcome, Varel. Listen, I…ah…I really need to eat something. We all need food and water and rest before we can attend to our dead, the Joining ceremony and ridding the estate of darkspawn corpses. Could you gather all the survivors together and see what provisions we have?"

"Yes, Commander. The kitchens are at the back of the keep, if you will join us there." He bowed to her and Alistair and turned, waving soldiers back up to the keep.

Kallian turned back to Alistair. "Are you sure you can't stay?"

Alistair nodded. "I wish I could, I do, but I'm on my way to Highever to meet with Teryn Fergus Cousland to discuss what aid we can offer him in rebuilding. Look, the security of Ferelden relies on the Grey Wardens now even weakened as the order is. It will be up to you to deal with the vestiges of the Blight before the situation grows out of control. No easy task, but I am confident you're up to the task."

"Thank you, Alistair. Please extend my greetings to Teryn Cousland. I would offer assistance if I could, but I think the damage here is extensive, to both the property and the people. We, too, must rebuild."

"Keep me informed of your progress, all right?" Alistair gripped her arm.

The king chatted briefly with Zevran and Oghren and the others before turning back to his retinue to mount his horse. "Good luck, Sister. May the Maker watch over you."

"Maker watch over us all, Brother."

xXx

An hour later, Kallian was seated at the head of a large dining table, watching the others eat. In addition to Varel, the senior staff included Captain Garevel who was to replace Rowland, and Mistress Woolsey, sent from Weisshaupt to manage the keep's treasury. From the soldiers' ranks they had accounted for Sergeant Marverlies and Private Evalyn and nine soldiers, the injured having been seen to by Anders and Petra, who were proving to be quite the healing team. Other soldiers had been sent out to scout the surrounding area and had yet to return, so it was anyone's guess how many more might join them. They had also found dwarven brothers Dworkin and Voldrik Glavonak, who had been hired to supply bombs and stone masonry work, respectively; a Circle mage ambassador named Cera; two merchants named Alexi and Yuriah; four household staff who cooked and cleaned; an elven grounds keeper named Samuel. She was delighted to discover that Alistair had arranged to send Wade and Herren to the keep to outfit her men, and equally happy to find them alive, even if Wade had done nothing but complain ever since.

Varel asked her if she had seen anyone else in the homes surrounding the keep and was saddened to hear she had not.

"We have a dozen homes here, a dozen families," he whispered as she and Zevran huddled close to him. "If they are lost, we lose a great deal in return. Collectively, they provide us with eggs, fowl, milk, butter, cheese, the ingredients required for the ale we brew, wool…"

"That is a loss indeed, Varel, and if they truly are lost, we must invite others to take their place. If the countryside is, as we hear, being terrorized by these roaming bands of darkspawn, an invitation to reside here, under our protection, will mean something. Perhaps even more so if we bring them into the keep itself to complement the household staff. There's an entire wing of servants' quarters."

"Perhaps," he acknowledged.

Captain Garevel leaned forward in his seat. "Commander, I hate to bring this up now, but I am reminded that we have a prisoner in the dungeon. He was found creeping around the grounds the same day we were attacked. It took four Wardens to capture him."

"Has he had no food or water since?" Kallian asked, sitting up straight.

Garevel shrugged, looking slightly baffled by her concern for a common thief.

"Maker's breath. Bronwyn?"

"Yes, my lady. Commander. Er…" The poor girl looked positively frightened as she leapt up from her seat at the far end of the table.

Smiling in an effort to hide her annoyance with the titles, Kallian stood. "If I'm wearing my armor, call me Commander. If I'm wearing regular clothing, 'my lady' will suffice, I suppose. Could you please ensure that some hardtack, a jug of water, salt pork and cheese be taken to the prisoner?"

"Yes, Commander." With a curtsey, Bronwyn scurried off.

Kallian cleared her throat and knocked on the table to get everyone's attention.

"Thank you. There is much to be done in order to clean up and recover from this attack, but I think we have a few priorities. I have a Joining ceremony to perform this evening, we must rest and then we must honor our dead and rid our estate of vermin that has invaded. While I take care of my duties, I would be grateful if the rest of you could find accommodations for us all. Many, if not all, of us need to clean up, as well.

"I think until we know for certain that we are indeed safe from further darkspawn attack, we should sleep in groups. There are thirty seven of us in total, plus Lucius, and it looked as though the Wardens' quarters were spacious enough to hold four to six to a room. As long as those who do not know how to fight are protected, we will be fine."

There was a pause and everyone looked at her expectantly. Sighing, she finally said "Dismissed."

Wood scraping on stone echoed throughout the hall and armor creaked and clanked as everyone stood and prepared to follow her orders. Zevran stood and took her hand. Planting a kiss on her knuckles, he stroked her cheek.

"You look exhausted, amata. We must find you a bed and get you out of your armor."

"When the others have beds, mio marito. We're almost there." She squeezed his hand and they followed Varel.

Varel showed them to the armory first, where everyone stripped off their armor and hung it up, putting their weapons on racks as well. Once they all had a change of clothing and a towel ready, they went to the common bathing room used by the soldiers. This room was fitted with several deep tubs enchanted with runes that would either fill the tubs with water or send a cascade of water pouring out of a stone disc suspended above each tub.

Varel had argued with Kallian, insisting she and Zevran go first and bathe alone as the lord and lady of the estate, and standing under a stream of hot water, she couldn't help but be grateful she had been far too tired to insist otherwise.

"This is _fantastic_," Kallian groaned as a she rinsed soap from her hair and body. "If it weren't for the long line of people outside, I could stay here for hours."

The hot water had done wonders to ease the aches and pains from her muscles and it was a relief to be free of the stench of darkspawn. She stood under the stream for a while longer before stopping the flow with a tap to the rune stone.

Zevran wrapped a towel around her and helped her out of the tub. Drying off and dressing as quickly as they could, they gathered their things and stepped out into the hall. Kallian sent all the remaining women in to bathe and instructed the men to do the same when the women were done. As each group bathed, the others waited, chatting. Strangely, in spite of how exhausted and traumatized everyone was, the atmosphere in the hallway was light. Kallian made a point of talking with everyone and saw that they were doing the same. Soldiers and staff and warden recruits were following her example, all mingling, getting to know each other a little, and offering comfort to one another. Having shared such a terrible experience had drawn them together, binding them and giving them a deeper understanding of the purpose they served. When they had all bathed, they climbed to the second floor to seek beds for the night.

Kallian pulled Varel aside to ask where she might perform the joining ceremony, wondering how she was going to approach the matter of having a potion to work with. She had made a point of bringing several vials of archdemon blood and Avernus' potion with her, along with the instructions for mixing it. The kit was contained in an ironwood box tucked into the very center of her pack.

"Varel, if you could tell me where our room is, I'd be grateful. I'll also need a private room for the Joining. Um…"

"You have a suite of rooms, Commander, at the end of the hall. There is a fairly large sitting room, den and library, bath, and bedroom. The Ambassador had been outfitting all of the rooms in this wing with runes for the baths, and we've been removing family portraits, but we have fallen a bit behind as you would expect. We should be on track within a few days."

He lowered his voice. "However, for the Joining, I would suggest the throne room. Everything we need for the ceremony is there and should any of your recruits not survive, it would be an easy matter to remove them from the keep quickly, with little notice, as there is an exit at the back. You wouldn't want to alarm anyone any more than they have been already."

Kallian was stunned and didn't know what to say. Varel knew how to perform a Joining; he knew recruits could die during the ceremony. He chuckled at her expression.

"Commander, the Orlesian Wardens were fairly tight lipped about many things, but you will find that many other things are widely known. However, as administrator of the Grey Warden lands here in Amaranthine, I am privy to information that they would not normally trust to others who are not members of the order. The Ambassador can assist you with preparing the potion and I am able to conduct the actual ceremony if you wish"

Recovering her voice, she thanked him. "Well, all things considered, that is definitely for the best. I have some things here in my pack, a refined mixture that I would like to use, but if you could please bring the recruits and Ambassador Cera with you, I will meet you downstairs. Zev, would you walk with me?"

She didn't speak again until they began to descend the stairs to the main floor.

"Maker have mercy, Zev, I'm nervous. I don't know if I can ask Ambassador Cera to do this. I mean, the instructions should really just be something like 'a shot of this and a shot of that, mix it up and drink it down', right? It looks short enough. You don't suppose it includes any dire warnings like 'this ritual may contain blood magic, proceed with caution', do you?"

By the time they had found the throne room, she was twisting her tunic in her hands, worrying about the souls under her care.

"You heard Alistair, amata. You must rebuild the order and by any means necessary, I would say. If anyone chooses to disagree with you…" he shrugged. "However, you have had reasonable success with honesty thus far."

Kallian laughed and nodded. "Indeed, it has served me well. Perhaps I'll leave out the darker details until I know better what I'm dealing with, but I will proceed with Avernus' new potion."

She remembered Ser Jory, a human Duncan had recruited along with her and Daveth. Upon seeing Daveth die, he abruptly changed his mind about becoming a Warden and had attempted to back out of the Joining. Duncan had to kill the man, leaving a widow and child behind. She had often wondered what Duncan would have done if Jory hadn't drawn his sword, forced him to drink the potion? She would never know, and hoped she would never have to make such drastic choices while she was Warden Commander. This made her stop and think for a moment. If indeed it was true that the less attractive aspects of being a Warden were widely known, and their recent victory against the archdemon was to give them a boost in popularity (_how could it not?_ she reasoned), recruiting might be easier than she had imagined. It might be…_sexy_ to be a Grey Warden.

Zevran pulled Kallian out of her thoughts by suggesting that they walk around to look at the various books and items on display along the outer perimeter of the throne room. She realized she was too tired to register much about the things she saw and resolved to make an effort to better explore her new home when she was more alert. Not too long into their stroll, the door to the throne room swung open and Varel and Ambassador Cera came into the room. Kallian could see Anders, Oghren and Mhairi waiting outside.

"Perhaps I should wait outside with the others," Zevran offered. "While you are performing the ceremony, I will prepare our bed for the night and make you some tea, hm?"

Nodding, Kallian kissed his cheek. "Thank you, Zev."

"Good luck, bella."

xXx

In the end, Kallian's concerns about the preparations for the Joining were unfounded. Varel and Ambassador Cera readily accepted her explanation that Avernus had developed a new mix of darkspawn blood for the joining and asked no questions at all. Cera read the instructions and proceeded to mix enough for three recruits. New worries filled Kallian's mind, but she pushed them aside and welcomed the recruits.

Varel, Cera and Kallian stood before Mhairi, Anders and Oghren, and the seneschal spoke.

"The time has come for us to begin the Joining. I shall speak the words that have been said since the first…"

xXx

Kallian stared down at the two Wardens who lay at her feet, faces twitching as the nightmares came upon them. Oghren stood beside her, belching every now and then. When he hadn't passed out, Kallian wondered if they'd mixed the potion correctly, but Anders and Mhairi had reacted just as Ser Cauthrien had, eyes going white, bodies stiffening and falling back, and they lived. The success of this Joining combined with sheer exhaustion had made her quite giddy, giving her the illusion of a second wind, but her energy was waning again and she wasn't sure she'd still be standing if it weren't for the fact that Zevran was by her side, all but holding her up.

Varel and Oghren had agreed to stay with Anders and Mhairi and they had fetched cots, blankets and pillows for them from the infirmary. Now that the rest of the household was sleeping and they were ready to turn in, Kallian bade them goodnight.

"Thank you for all you've done, Varel. Have a good night's sleep, gentlemen. We'll be in our suite." She and Zevran retreated to the second floor, Lucius at their heels.

Their rooms had obviously once belonged to Rendon Howe. They were huge, with beamed ceilings higher than she had ever seen, even at the royal palace in Denerim. The walls were covered with wooden paneling and a light plaster and each room was furnished with large, heavy pieces made of ornately carved wood, leather and fine fabrics. Large paintings had been removed from the walls and were propped up around the room, partially packed. She stopped and stared at a portrait of a young Howe, sitting on his throne, the robes of his office and a gaudy livery collar around his shoulders. He looked different, healthy, vibrant, almost handsome, and yet there was still something in his eye, a glimmer of the monster he would become, and she wanted the thing gone from her sight. She and Zevran pulled it and the crate it was to go into outside and locked the door behind them when they returned to their suite. Lucius settled down in the corner almost immediately and was snoring softly in no time.

Zevran took his wife's hand and led her through the sitting room and den and into the bedroom. A canopy bed of enormous proportions stood along one wall of the room, flanked by two windows covered with heavy drapes. A fire was crackling in the hearth and a warming pan had been slipped between the sheets. He pulled the pan out and returned it to its spot by the fire, helped Kallian undress and then pulled his own clothes off. They climbed onto the bed and under the sheets, gravitating to the warmest spot.

"I can't believe everyone survived," Kallian whispered as they pressed their bodies together. "Apparently that hardly ever happens. Might be my luck, might be the new potion, but I really don't care much. Too tired. Ti amo."

"Mm, go to sleep amata. As much as I would like to ravish you, I agree. Ti amo."

They were asleep before either could think to say anything more.

* * *

A/N: Tune in next time when Kallian, Zevran, their companions and the survivors of the keep pick up the pieces and carry on, finding an unlikely recruit in the process.

Thank you Bioware for the use of dialogue, some verbatim, some not quite. Thank you, readers, for adding me to your alerts/faves lists! As always, I love to hear from you, so please feel free to comment and review. Cheers, Biff.


	3. A Whole New Kind of Adventure

**A Whole New Kind of Adventure**

20 Harvestmere, 9:30

When Kallian first awoke, she kept her eyes closed and listened. Zevran was snuggled up behind her, his breathing slow and steady, and from out in the sitting room she could hear Lucius snoring. She cracked an eye open and could tell it was dark outside, but wasn't sure if it was still the middle of the night or nearly dawn. It didn't matter; she wanted to stay in bed. She was not looking forward to the clean up and the funeral pyres, and wanted, if only for a few minutes, to pretend that nothing was out of the ordinary and no one needed her for anything. Zevran's breath in her hair sent a shiver down her spine and she felt her pulse begin to race. Closing her eyes again, she pressed her thighs together, imagining Zevran making love to her, and her breath quickened.

That was when she heard it and stilled herself, listening. From somewhere outside she heard it again, faint but distinct. A rooster crowed. Save for the crows that were always present scavenging for carrion, the grounds of the keep had seemed devoid of animal life, domesticated or otherwise, when they had arrived. She took the presence of a rooster as a welcome sign that _some_ semblance of normalcy might be returning to the keep.

"Thank the Maker," she whispered.

Zevran stirred beside her, his arm sliding around her waist.

"Buongiorno, mio marito, mio amore," she purred, pulling his hand to her breasts.

"Buongiorno, amata." Zevran cupped a breast in his hand, gently pinching and pulling on her nipple.

Rolling over to face him, Kallian pushed herself up on one arm and rested her hand on Zevran's cheek, eyes searching his. "The past few days have been terrible. I have felt…out of sorts, not quite myself, full of grief. I dread our duties today, but you…you have been a great comfort to me, Zev, and I must thank you for that." She held his gaze a moment longer. "I love you."

She kissed him before he could respond, tenderly at first, her lips barely touching his. As the kiss deepened and became more passionate, she caressed his ear and dragged her fingers through his hair, nails gently scraping his scalp. He groaned and pulled her closer, and in spite of the cool air in their bed chamber, she felt deliciously warm. It had been days since they had done more than sleep together and now that they were clean and rested and safe to enjoy one another's company, it seemed an excellent time to do exactly that. She straddled his hips and smiled down at him.

"What are you thinking?" he asked with a grin, absentmindedly letting his hand drift to her stomach. They had both become fascinated by the way it had begun to harden and protrude ever so slightly.

Kallian licked her lips and bent over to kiss Zevran's chest. "Oh, I know you know what I'm thinking."

He was hard against her groin and she rocked her hips to rub her sex along his manhood. Zevran's hands found her hips and before she could object he had flipped her onto her back and covered her body with his, pinning her to the bed. Amber eyes dark with desire, he kissed her mouth, ears, throat, collarbone. His warm lips and hot breath were on her shoulders, breasts, navel, the crook of her elbow, and every inch of her felt alive with desire. He slid down the bed and kissed her thighs and when his lips finally pressed against the core of her and his tongue pressed into her, she cried out his name.

"Ti amo, amata," he whispered as he slid his length into her. "Ti amo."

Kallian sighed with pleasure and contentment as their bodies met, wrapping her arms and legs around Zevran. Thoughts of the day ahead of them faded away as a pool of warmth spread throughout Kallian's body and she lost herself in the moment.

xXx

Kallian pulled on her boots, tunic, leggings and cloak, and crossed to the large set of curtains opposite their bed. Pulling one aside, she discovered double doors made of thick wood and steel, set with several small panes of glass, which opened out onto the ramparts. She opened the doors and stepped outside, taking a deep breath of fresh air. Their suite was at the front of the keep and they had a clear view of the courtyards and baileys, over the gates and fields and spiked barricade, and of the road and hills beyond. The keep was angled to the south and would have good sun exposure all year long, when the sun was out as it was now. It was a breathtaking view as the sun rose, and the air was invigorating. Zevran joined her, pulling her back to his chest and wrapping his arms around her.

"I didn't expect _this_." She waved her hand in front of her. "It's beautiful."

A distant knock and then the sound of someone shouting "Hello?" drifted out to them and Kallian groaned.

"Enter!" she shouted back. "And so the day begins, I suppose."

Zevran turned her around in his arms and kissed her, releasing her just as Varel joined them on the rampart. She giggled and straightened her clothes while Varel apologized for interrupting.

"Nonsense, Varel. If we hadn't wanted you to come in, we would have told you so. Besides, our friends will tell you to get used to this. I hope, however, that you will not make a habit of arriving at dawn every day."

"No, Commander, but today is an unusual day."

"Yes," she sighed sadly, stepping toward the outer wall to peer down into the courtyard.

She could see the soldiers there, carefully loading a wagon with darkspawn corpses. The others were laying the bodies of Grey Wardens, soldiers and staff out to be prepared for funeral pyres. Mistress Woolsey and Captain Garevel appeared to be in charge of recording the names of the dead, while other staff cleaned up. The keep was alive and bustling with activity already.

"Well, let us join the others and get this over with. Varel, I don't know how the Wardens are to be handled, but the others…their personal effects will be returned to their families if possible, yes?"

"Yes, Commander," Varel replied as they left the Commander's suite with Zevran. "Woolsey will see to that."

"Varel, please call me Kallian whenever the situation allows it."

Varel nodded. "Thank you, Kallian. You may find that those of us who served under Howe are…_fearful_ of misstepping, being punished. It really hasn't been that long since Howe was last here and he ruled with a very harsh hand. I am not ashamed to say word of his death was well met by those of us who knew him."

"I'm sure there's a story there, but I assure you, I am a vastly different kind of person." She shuddered just thinking about Howe and reached for Zevran's hand, relaxing as his fingers slipped between hers.

Varel smiled. "Yes, I rather like that about you."

xXx

Kallian directed the destruction of the darkspawn corpses, which they took out to the fields beyond the keep's outer defenses and set ablaze, while Varel and the rest of the staff took care of the bodies of their own. As they tended to the Wardens, Varel recalled that one, a fellow named Kristoff, had actually been away in Amaranthine at the time of the attack. Kallian didn't have the heart to tell him she thought it was highly unlikely that he was alive, since she had felt no sense of any living Wardens as they had travelled to the keep, and found herself hoping that perhaps she had been so full of grief at the time she had missed him somehow. They determined that three Wardens were definitely missing; the remaining eight were placed on one large pyre. The keep's soldiers and staff were burned on two additional pyres. The sun was finally dipping toward the horizon when the fires were reduced to piles of smoldering ashes and Kallian remembered the prisoner.

"Zev, Anders, please come with me. Mhairi, Oghren, I'd like you to round up Samuel, the groundskeeper, and some of the soldiers and walk the curtain wall. I want any remaining breaches patched as much as possible before nightfall."

The young housekeeper Bronwyn appeared at her side with a mug of steaming hot liquid. "My lady, Petra asked me to give this to you. Broth to tide you over to supper."

Kallian smiled, feeling an immense sense of gratitude for all that she did have at the keep. These people were here to help make her job easier and it was a blessing for which she was grateful. She was determined to make sure they knew this.

"Thank you so much, Bronwyn."

They walked to the entrance to the dungeon. Bronwyn updated Kallian on the state of the kitchens and larder while the latter sipped her broth. Bronwyn also reported that the prisoner had been fed twice since the previous evening, but still had not spoken.

"The prisoner, my lady…he looks familiar, though I cannot imagine where I would have seen him. I have been employed here for four months now and have not been away from the estate much."

"Hmm. Well, thank you Bronwyn. I'll see you later, at supper."

"Thank you, my lady, my lord." She curtsied and ran back to the keep.

Zevran smoothed his hair and tunic. "Mmm. _My lord_. I do like the sound of that." He pulled the door open and followed Anders and a giggling Kallian down the long flight of stairs to the cells below.

"Good morning, Daveth. How are you today?"

The soldier stood at attention and smiled. "Very well, my lady, and happy to be alive." He bowed to Zevran and congratulated Anders on becoming a Warden.

While the men exchanged pleasantries, Kallian looked at the lone prisoner in the center cell. He sat on the floor leaning against the far wall, just at the edge of the pool of light caused by the lanterns Daveth had lit. She couldn't see much. He had his knees drawn up, head down, dark hair hiding his face. If he was awake, he wasn't letting her see it.

"Bronwyn tells me he hasn't spoken yet."

"No, my lady. He's been locked up here four nights now, safe while our good men and women died." Anger crept into Daveth's voice. "He's just a common thief, but it did take four Wardens to bring him down."

"What did he have with him when he was caught?"

Daveth took her to a trunk nearby and opened it. There was nothing much; drakeskin armor, leather boots, a bow, arrows, belt, amulet and two rings.

"Hmm. If you could please open the door, I'd like to speak with our guest."

Zevran and Anders both protested, but she waved off their concern. "Anders, can you paralyze him if he tries anything?"

The mage looked slightly affronted. "Of course, my lady."

"Would you _please_…oh, never mind," Kallian sighed.

The creaking of the jail cell door opening drew her attention back to the prisoner. "Thank you, Daveth."

She stepped into the cell and stopped just inside the door, crouching down to get a better look at the man. Kallian sucked in her breath when he finally looked up at her. That face…She stood and he began to pick himself up off the ground.

"Well, if it isn't the great hero, conqueror of the Blight and vanquisher of all evil. Aren't you supposed to be ten feet tall with lightning bolts shooting out of your eyes?"

"Pfft. Are you trying to insult me?" She crossed her arms over her chest and began tapping her foot on the floor.

He shrugged and answered her unasked question. "Somehow I thought my father's murderer would be more…_impressive_. You're an elf." The way he said it, it didn't sound quite like an insult, more a statement, as though he'd been caught off guard by the realization.

Kallian's eyes narrowed and she pursed her lips. "Is this where I'm supposed to say something like 'that explains the pointy ears and short stature'? I assume you're a Howe. You bear a remarkable resemblance to a portrait in my suite."

She could hear Zevran let out a low whistle and then mutter an explanation to Anders when the mage asked what was going on.

The prisoner's lip lifted in a sneer. "I am Nathaniel Howe. My family owned these lands until you showed up. Do you even remember my father?" His insolent tone was grating on Kallian's nerves.

"Of _course_ I remember your father. Rendon Howe's last words to me were 'Maker spit on you, you knife eared bitch. I deserved more.' Rather hard to forget something like that, but his list of accomplishments is rather lengthy."

She began counting on her fingers. "He slaughtered the Cousland family, indeed everyone within the castle, even innocent women and _children _and visiting nobility. He conspired with Teyrn Loghain to sell members of my community, the Denerim alienage, to Tevinter slavers, and we may never see any of them again. He held Queen Anora captive so she couldn't interfere with their plans to take over the throne. He held innocent men and women prisoner and tortured them to gain information to further his own plots. That's just to name just a few.

"I am grateful to him for one thing, however. Had he not hired this assassin to kill me, I wouldn't have met my husband. The current Arl of Amaranthine. Also an elf." She waved a hand over her shoulder to Zevran.

The man was an accomplished rogue, of that she was certain, and though he was clearly angry, he seemed in control of his emotions. His eyes were his weakness, however, betraying an inner turmoil. Kallian didn't sense that he was a real threat; his bravado seemed false. She cocked her head to one side and considered him as he spoke.

"My father served the Hero of River Dane and fought against the Orlesians, yet our family lost everything!" He began to pace back and forth at the back of the cell, his hands curling into fists and back out again, over and over.

"I came here…I-I thought I was going to try to kill you, to lay a trap for you. But then I realized I just wanted to reclaim some of my family's things." He stopped to lean against the wall and shrugged. "It is all I have left."

Kallian felt sorry for him, remorseful, even, for killing his father when she knew how much she valued her own relationship with her father. Would she believe the accusations if her father were accused of terrible crimes? She knew she wouldn't, she would try to discover the truth. How would she react if the accusations _were_ true? She wasn't certain she knew.

"How much did you know about your father?"

He turned to face her, anger flaring in his dark eyes. "If you're asking if I had any idea what he was up to, the answer is no. I was squired in the Free Marches.

"Look, I know you're a hero. You fought a war and you won and to the victor go the spoils, right? But whatever my father did shouldn't harm the rest of my family. The Howes are pariahs now, those of us left. It's all thanks to you and now you get to decide my fate. Ironic, isn't it?"

Kallian chuckled and shook her head. "Some would say everything happens for a reason. What would you do if I let you go?"

More protests from behind her. She raised a hand to silence them.

Howe looked genuinely confused. "Let me go? I…I don't know. I only came back to Ferelden a month ago." He continued pacing, his eyes taking on a mischievous gleam.

"If you let me go, I might come back again. You might not catch me the next time."

"Really? You aren't making a very good case for yourself," Kallian snorted.

"I could lie, if you prefer." He leaned back against the wall, folding his arms across his chest.

Kallian took a moment to really look at the man. For some reason the Warden recruit Daveth came to mind again, the man set to hang from the gallows, freed when Duncan conscripted him. Duncan had given Daveth a chance to redeem himself, really, and had he survived he may very well have made a good Warden.

"I understand you gave the Wardens a hard time."

"I am not without skills. My time abroad wasn't spent chasing skirts and drinking wine," he scoffed.

"And what skills are those?" she asked.

"Hunting, scouting, fighting…_poisons_…why? What do you care?"

Kallian shrugged and sucked her breath through her teeth. "I think I've decided what to do with you."

There was the briefest flash of fear in Howe's eyes before indifference sent in again. "Already? Good."

The door to the prison swung open and Daveth and Varel walked in.

Kallian smiled at them both. "Ah, good. Varel, did you know this is Nathaniel Howe?"

Varel's brows lifted with surprise. "A Howe? Figures they would turn up eventually. They are implacable enemies, my lady."

She shrugged and puffed out a lungful of air, looking Howe in the eye. "I invoke the right of conscription."

Anders and Zevran both began protesting yet again. Varel and Daveth stiffened, neither of them comfortable enough with the new arlessa to argue, but clearly questioning her decision. Howe stammered.

"Wh-what? No, absolutely _not_. Hang me first!"

"Is that _really_ how you want to play this? Death by Grey Warden? Don't tempt me, it's been a rough couple of days." She put her hands on her hips and stared at him. "You don't think this is better than dying? A chance to redeem your family's name?"

"Hard to say. You like having Grey Wardens who want you dead?"

"Pfft. Some of my best friends have wanted me dead. Have you met my husband?"

There was a moment of silence before Howe spoke again. "I don't know if this is a vote of confidence or punishment."

"Well, that all depends on what you make of this opportunity, I suppose. Zev? Please lead the way. Anders, I'll need you to find Ambassador Cera for me. Tell her we have need of her services. Daveth and Varel, please escort Nate to the throne room."

xXx

_24 Harvestmere, 9:30_

_All four recruits survived the Joining. I doubt I can count on such luck every time, but considering our arrival at Vigil's Keep, it was a blessing not to have to add any more bodies to the pyre. Unfortunately, all the Orlesian Wardens, save perhaps for this Kristoff fellow, are either dead or missing. I cannot say I am confident Kristoff is alive, but I cannot bring myself to dampen the hope of the others. Zevran knows. It seems I do not have to tell him much these days, he has learned to read me so well. _

_I have come into a mess here at the keep. Dworkin's bombs have damaged the lower levels of the keep and the building generally needs to be fortified, as do many of the out buildings and the curtain wall. I suppose it is good news that these bombs have also caused a tunnel in the basement to collapse. This is where the darkspawn entered the keep. Given that I can feel the presence of the beasts all the time, tainted blood rolling through my veins and a sensation between my shoulders akin to a thousand spiders crawling around there, it is perhaps understandable how the Wardens were overcome._

_We found treasures and horrors when we ventured into the basements, discovering what has happened to many of the people living around the keep. Several men and women were trapped below, having been turned into ghouls, and most unfortunately for Howe, we discovered a woman named Adria had met the same fate. I gather she was like a mother to him when he was younger. He begged me not to kill her, to spare her, but there was no hope of recovery, there never is. I can only hope he sees this. Her mabari, a female named Rosa, is now recovering and I have hope she may imprint upon him. The poor hound was down in the basement for close to a week with no food or water, her mistress slowly dying. Lucius and Nate were able to get her to respond eventually and between Lucius' constant presence, Anders' magic, several mabari crunch cookies, and a bath, it looks as though she will survive._

_We had to fight off small pockets of darkspawn all along the way, but eventually cleared the area. Our investigation led us to an entrance into the Deep Roads, of all things, here under the keep. Voldrik will seal the area and with any luck we will not be attacked from within again. As I write about it now, it all sounds so simple, but it took the better part of two full days to secure the keep and if it were not for the all the soldiers and Wardens combining their efforts, I am certain it would have taken much longer. We found lyrium sand, which Dworkin will be able to use to make more bombs. That dwarf is insane, but I certainly cannot argue that his talents will be of great use to us._

_We have an interesting bunch of characters here, most of whom are quite pleasant and jovial. Howe is really the only dark spot in the household at the moment and I am hoping I can turn his mood around. I haven't seen much other than a scowl on his face since we first met, although I cannot blame him much. He ran into Samuel for the first time this afternoon, however, and discovered that his sister Delilah is alive and living in Amaranthine, married to a shopkeeper. I am not certain why he thought her dead, but when Samuel told him she was alive, Nate smiled and seemed truly happy. I believe he cares about and takes joy in things his father had no time for, and I am all the more convinced that I made the right decision in conscripting him. I found some things he might want to have – letters of his sister's and an antique bow – and intend to give them to him this evening._

_~ KA_

Kallian stood in the middle of the throne room, staring at Woolsey, Varel, Garevel and Voldrik. Zevran and the Wardens were milling about the room, feigning great interest in the books and other items on display. She had finally asked for a report on the state of the arling and found herself wishing she'd done so before supper so that she wouldn't fear seeing it again. She put a hand on her stomach and took a deep breath, vaguely aware of Zevran murmuring to a servant who then scurried out of the room.

"So let me see if I have this right." Kallian looked up. "The keep itself is in disrepair and requires an investment in skilled labor, we have lost fifty percent of our guard, the region has suffered financially and we need to attract merchants, craftsmen and farmers to the keep so we can rebuild the treasury and this community, we need materials for the keep and our smithy and soldiers to guard the miners, _and_ we need to protect the farmers and the city of Amaranthine? Is that all?"

The others nodded, not sure if they should say anything more. Kallian nodded and began pacing back and forth, huffing a little as she contemplated how much worse things could possibly get.

"Well then. Um…here's what I think. The city of Amaranthine has its own walls and guard and should be able to take care of itself for a while longer. I am more concerned about the unprotected farmers between the city and the keep, and frankly we are only as strong as our weakest link. I will not have this keep be that weak link. We need to rebuild and fortify and I am prepared to fund the labor myself. As we are exploring the area, we will keep an eye open for a better stone supply. Whatever new metals and other crafting materials we find will go to Herren and Wade."

She looked up as the servant returned to offer her a mug of steaming tea, the variety she drank for morning sickness. She offered the young elven woman a smile and took a sip before turning her attention back to the others.

"Rebuilding is our first priority, but I think we can work on other projects at the same time. I want the word put out that we are recruiting, not only for the Wardens, but also the keep's guard. Room and board and with any luck a healthy stipend in return for joining.

"We also need to do an inventory of the houses on the property, repair any damage and clean up. Then we can start inviting other families to move in. The protection of our guard and the close proximity of a secure keep should be enticing enough. We need everything from cows and goats, to milk, chickens, eggs and cheese to wheat, wool, and meat. If we can turn it into something we can eat, drink, wear or sell, I want it here. We need staff, as well. Woolsey, Varel and Garevel, you're in charge of hiring. I will want routine reports on what's going on, of course, and to meet new arrivals and such, but Zev can look into people's backgrounds to make sure we aren't hiring enemies, assassins and whatnot."

She paused and began pacing again. "While we're getting back on our feet I will have to figure out how we can take care of everything else that needs doing. Is there anything else?"

Varel cleared his throat. "Well, yes. We will need to assemble the lords and ladies of the arling to swear their fealty to you. This will be a rather delicate matter, as some were fiercely loyal to Rendon Howe and have lost dearly as a result of his fall. They may see you as being directly responsible for this."

Kallian sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "How soon do we need to do that?"

"Well, it could take several days for them to arrange passage and prepare. Perhaps we could set a date in a week to ten days."

She nodded. "If we make a push to repair all damage between the main gates and this room, we should make a good enough impression. Fine, let's do that. I want to go to Amaranthine tomorrow, but I'll check in with you before we leave to provide the funds I'm committing to your various efforts. Something else I'm thinking is I'd like to have a Satinalia celebration of some sort, so we'll need to plan for that. Ah…I need to talk to the Wardens now, so you may go if there's nothing else."

Woolsey, Varel and Garevel took their leave and Kallian sought out Zevran's company.

"This is…a whole new kind of adventure, isn't it? I wonder what disaster awaits us around the next corner. Gah." She rested her head on his shoulder.

"Tesora, life would be boring otherwise, yes?" He kissed the top of her head. "Come, speak with your Wardens and then let me take you to bed, mia moglie."

"Hmm, you are brilliant." She stood up straight and called to the others as she strode to the chest and large armoire at the end of the hall. "Gather around."

Unlocking the chest, she took out a small bundle of letters. "Nate, I found these and thought you might like to have them."

He took the package from her, his eyes widening when he realized what they were. "I-I don't know what to say, Commander. Thank you."

"It was nothing, Nate, really."

He stared at her a moment longer before leaning against a nearby pillar to look through the letters.

"Anders, this earring might appeal to you," she said as she held out a gold hoop to the mage, who did indeed appreciate the gift.

"Ohgren, I know how much you like your liquor." She handed the red headed dwarf a bottle of West Hills brandy she had found.

"Mhairi, I notice your great sword is in rough shape. While Wade can certainly repair it, I thought you might like to wield this." She wrestled a sword out of the armoire, her nose wrinkling with disgust. "It smells funny, I am sorry to say, but it is made of dragon bone and is enchanted to cause fire damage while protecting you from the same."

Mhairi took the sword from Kallian and stepped away from the group, swinging it back and forth and checking its balance. "Thank you, Commander, it is a fine weapon."

"Nate tells me this may very well be Ser Alvard's missing sword, the object of a local legend. If you're curious, he should be able to tell you more." She pressed her hands to the small of her back and stretched.

"Okay. I am extremely tired and very much looking forward to a hot bath and a good night's rest, and I imagine you are too. I would like us to go to Amaranthine tomorrow. We need supplies, I want to take a look around, Nate's sister Delilah should be there, and I need to make a few contacts for recruiting, that sort of thing. You with me?"

Everyone nodded and began drifting out of the room. Howe glanced over his shoulder at Kallian and then back to the letters in his hand, shaking his head to himself as he disappeared.

Zevran took Kallian's hand and began walking her to their chambers. "You seem to have won him over, amata."

She slipped her arms around his waist and pressed her head to his shoulder. "It's a bit early to tell, but you know I can be quite charming and persuasive at times. I have a good feeling about him. He is struggling to come to terms with the things he's hearing about his father and all that has happened in his absence. That has to be hard for a man like him, who has such a deep sense of honor and loyalty to his family. But…I think a visit with his sister will help. I hope it does."

They arrived at their suite and Zevran pushed the door open, ushering Kallian into the room. "I think we have other business to attend to now, tesora, do we not?"

"Mmm, we do," she sighed as he pulled her into an embrace. "Ti amo, mio marito caro."

* * *

**A/N:** Greetings! Here I am after a bit of a break. Valentine's Day was also my 7th anniversary, so the hubby and I took some time out to celebrate that this week. I really do appreciate the continued support of readers, so thank you very much for that. I love hearing comments and getting reviews; please feel free to do either! Cheers, Biff


	4. You Suck the Joy Out of Being Angry

**You Really Suck the Joy Out of Being Angry**

25 Harvestmere, 9:30

It had started with a discussion about how they would divide their duties for both the Grey Wardens and the arling, and they were trying to decide how best to share their chambers between the two of them. That was when Kallian had commented that the present desk was as big as a bed and they should move it out and use two smaller desks instead. With a raised eyebrow, Zevran had swept his arm across the top of the desk, pushed her onto it and made love to her. Kallian and Zevran were sprawled across the desk, having agreed that while it wasn't quite as big as a bed, it was a fair size. Her fingers were slowly tracing the lines of his tattoos as she listened to his heart beating in his chest, a comforting rhythm. Zevran was winding her hair around his fingers. She loved moments like this, when it was just the two of them and all the cares of the world seemed distant, unable to touch them. Their breathing had begun to slow and the cool air was chilling their sweat-dampened skin when there was a knock at the door.

Zevran stood up, pulling his tunic on and adjusting his breeches, while Kallian began scrambling around for her clothing, realizing they were late. She had wanted to leave for Amaranthine at dawn and yet here they were, a few hours later, no further ahead. She felt a flutter in her belly and smiled to herself as she remembered why, exactly, they were still in their chambers.

"I am not so certain you and I should share an office, Zev," Kallian whispered as she tugged her leggings on, hopping first on one foot and then the other as she pulled them up. Raising her voice, she yelled "Just a minute!"

Waiting for Kallian to quickly re-braid her hair and nod that she was ready, Zevran opened the door to reveal Anders, who stood in the hallway inspecting his finger nails.

"I have some urgent messages for you, courtesy of Private Evalyn." He produced two parchments from within the folds of his robes and held them out to Kallian. Looking around the room, he smirked. "I thought I heard you two having a little…_accident_ in here earlier. Any injuries you need me to attend to?"

"_Thank you_, Anders, but no," Kallian replied, choking back a laugh. As an afterthought, she added "Don't you dare break that woman's heart."

"Yes, Commander." He turned to leave, but Kallian stopped him.

"Hold on a moment, please, Anders. I might need you."

Kallian held the parchments out. "Pick one, Zev."

Zevran made his choice and they each opened a letter. After a moment, Kallian sighed and looked up. "Kidnapping ransom exchange. What about you?"

"Darkspawn threatening the…_Turnoble_ estate," Zevran replied as he looked around the room. "There is a map here somewhere…it is to the west."

Anders crouched down to pull the map out from underneath a book and spread it out on the desk while Kallian and Zevran exchanged letters and read them, pinpointing destinations on the map. Anders busied himself picking up other books and stacking them on the desk while he waited, reading covers and spines as he went.

"It seems logical that I should take the Turnoble estate and you should go out to Forlorn Cove to rescue the girl." Kallian was suggesting.

"Agreed. I will need a warrior, a few archers, and Petra."

"I'll take the Wardens, and ask Nate if he wants to bring Rosa. She needs the exercise and experience. Take Lucius with you, to protect Petra." Kallian put a hand on her stomach. "We can't have anything happen to her, now can we?" She flashed him a provocative smile.

Zevran put his arm around her waist to pull her close and within a heartbeat they were kissing, arms wrapped around each other.

"Ah-hem." Anders stood up, noisily scraping his chair across the stone floor. "I believe we have some heroics to get up to today?"

Kallian pulled away from Zevran with some reluctance. "Right you are. Very inappropriate of us, I apologize. Could you gather up the Wardens in the throne room and ask Garevel for a soldier and a few archers? Zev and I need to get our armor on. We'll be down in a few minutes."

The mage sauntered out of the room, shaking his head. "Right, I'll tell everyone you'll be an hour or two."

xXx

Kallian looked around the bailey at the two assembled teams and smiled. It had been a good morning thus far. Mhairi and Oghren were chatting with the soldiers Zevran would be taking with him, the former obviously trying to keep some distance between herself and the dwarf without looking too obvious about it. Various members of the household staff were milling about offering assistance, although Kallian suspected that recent events had made everyone nervous and just a bit afraid that this might be the last time they would see each other. Rosa and Lucius were playing together, chasing each other around the bailey.

Kallian looked for Nate. She had remembered to give him the bow she'd found and sent him off to Wade's smithy to see if it could be repaired. The bow had apparently belonged to his grandfather, and Nate mentioned that the man had been a Warden before he'd excused himself from her company. She wasn't certain, but she thought Nate's eyes had gotten teary as he muttered his gratitude and turned away. She spotted him talking to Herren and Wade and smiled. Herren was nodding, admiring the antique bow while gesturing at the damaged cable backing, while Wade pouted and was no doubt about to complain that this was a job beneath his skills.

Anders was fussing over the orange kitten she'd spotted drinking from a bucket of water when they had first come out of the keep. The poor thing was thin and scruffy looking, and had obviously been on its own for a while, but seemed friendly enough and came running to her for a bit of dried meat. Its reaction to Anders, and his to the cat, had been quite amusing. He cooed at the thing, let it bat at his fingers, and scratched its chin, sighing about a mouser named Mister Wiggums from the Circle. Deciding it couldn't hurt to let him keep the cat, she gave it to him. The cat had rubbed his face against Anders' chin and jaw, purring loudly, and the friendship was solidified. Anders named the cat Ser Pounce-a-Lot almost immediately and tucked him into the folds of his robes, much to the amusement of the others. Ser Pounce settled into a deep pocket, Nate returned from the smithy, and they were ready to go.

Kallian brought her horse close to Zevran's and leaned out as far as she dared. He kissed her, a hand cupping her cheek.

"Ti amo, mia cara," Zevran breathed into her ear.

Shivering with delight, she laughed. "Ti amo, marito. Ti amerò sempre."

With the household staff waving good bye, Kallian headed west and Zevran lead his team to the east coast. If all went well, they would return by nightfall, but if they had to, both groups were well prepared to camp overnight.

xXx

Zevran slept by the fireplace in their sitting room, a book of Antivan poetry resting in his lap where it had fallen, Lucius snoring at his feet. The kidnapping affair had been a relatively minor effort to resolve. The archers who volunteered to accompany him were excellent shots and had killed three of the kidnappers before a fourth ran off, leaving the last two to fend for themselves. Petra had cast a sleep spell on them, and the matter was over in less than ten minutes. The two men were bound and taken to Lord Bensley's estate along with his daughter. The man had been beside himself with joy upon seeing his child and Zevran felt a flood of emotion, witnessing their reunion, as thoughts of fatherhood drifted through his mind. It was, even now, still a hard thing to fathom and yet it filled his heart with an unexpected joy. He had wanted nothing more than to return to the keep and to Kallian's arms.

They arrived at the keep shortly after dark. A meal, several rounds of drinks and numerous bawdy songs later, and almost everyone else had turned in for the night, but there was still no sign of Kallian and her Wardens. Petra, who waited up with him, finally insisted they both retire, for certainly the others had stopped to camp or were staying at the estate over night and would be home in the morning. He prepared to turn in, but found himself feeling apprehensive. He tried to ignore it, tried to convince himself it was simply that it had been quite some time since he had been separated from Kallian and any number of things could have delayed her and the Wardens. Wine and terrible poetry finally put him to sleep.

xXx

Judging by the moon and stars, Kallian thought it must be close to midnight when the keep finally loomed in the near distance, less than half a league away. As they drew closer, she could hear a faint shout from the guard tower and saw a flash of fire as a torch was lit. A moment later, another torch lit up along the wall of the inner bailey. The moon was full and illuminated the road, but at this distance it would be impossible for the guards to tell if they were friend or foe; the flares were lit to summon more guards to the outer bailey and prepare staff for the arrival of either. It was reassuring to see that things were as they should be at the keep. She was tired and damp and wanted to be home, with Zevran. This day had not gone well.

They had arrived too late to do the Turnobles any good. The family had been killed, mutilated and hung up on display, visible from a fair distance in all directions. The Wardens left their horses in a nearby barn and approached the estate. As Kallian and her team had gotten closer, the sensations she'd been feeling for days, that rolling of the taint through her blood and the feeling of something crawling along her shoulder blades, flared briefly and they were set upon by a group of darkspawn led by the largest ogre she had ever seen. Everyone had risen to the challenge, in spite of their initial shock at the sight of the Turnobles and their unfortunate guests, and they soon had the advantage. In a moment of distraction, however, Rosa and Nate lost track of Anders who was so focused on casting protection and healing spells that he walked into a darkspawn mage's glyph of paralysis.

With Anders down, Kallian felt they needed an advantage. She shook her gauntlets off and made small cuts on the backs of her wrists, calling upon the powers of her tainted blood and killing the ogre and emissary in quick succession. The reaction of her teammates varied. Oghren knew about her skills and was more concerned with taking a swig from his flask when the battle was over to bother commenting now that he had actually seen her use them. Mhairi and Nate were understandably shocked; Zevran told her blackened blood flowed to her hands to coat her blades, the whites of her eyes turned blood red, and the speed with which she could move improved significantly, which could be a disturbing thing to witness. She wasn't prepared for Anders' reaction as the paralysis glyph faded, however.

"_Anders! Are you all right?" Kallian called out as she ran towards him._

_The mage's hand flew up in warning as he fell to one knee. "Don't come any closer," he gasped._

_Kallian skidded to a halt, searching the ground between them. "What is it, a magic trap?"_

"_What in the bloody blazes was _that_?" Anger flared in his eyes as he pointed to the cuts she had inflicted upon her wrists and then waved a hand at her face. "What's wrong with you? Your eyes…blood magic? How is that possible?"_

_She had a sinking feeling in her belly. "No…" _

"_The books on the desk in your room…" Anders was starting to piece something together; Kallian could see it in his face. "Avernus, a mage, something about…"_

_Kallian bit her lip and cursed herself for not having had this discussion with them sooner. "We should talk about this, but right now isn't…"_

_Anders had straightened up. "A katılma yan etkilerini azaltmak anlamına gelir…" He muttered to himself for a moment as he worked through the translation. _

"_Anders, would you please let me expl…" Kallian's anxiety was turning to anger._

"'_A means to mitigate the side effects of joining'? What does that mean? Joining the Grey Wardens? What side effects?" _

_Sparks crackled on Anders' fingertips and the air around him stirred, blowing loose wisps of hair over his face. Kallian hadn't known him long, but it was obvious she had crossed a line with him. She took a deep breath and tried to speak again._

"_If you'd…"_

"_What have you done to us?" Anders demanded._

"_Enough, mage!" Nate growled. "This is our commanding officer. You will show her respect and let her speak." Rosa moved to stand between Nate and Anders, keeping her gaze on the mage. _

_Kallian found herself thinking that the mabari was adapting very well to her new owner and then had to fight to suppress a nearly hysterical urge to laugh out loud at the absurdity of that thought at a time like this. _

_Mhairi stepped closer to Kallian's side as Oghren moved forward, his hands held out in a gesture of peace. "Calm down, Sparklefingers." _

_Clearing her throat, Kallian pointed to the Turnobles' home. "Perhaps we should take the opportunity to sit down and discuss this. There are some…things you need to know about what it means to be Wardens."_

_The walk there, which took hardly more than a moment, felt like an eternity to Kallian. As she watched Anders stalk off in front of them, she thought back on the past year. The Blight had been a miserable experience. They were cold and wet and hungry most of the time, on the run from Loghain's men, regularly beset upon by any number of beast, darkspawn or bandit, and they definitely had interpersonal conflict within their group. Every one of them knew what was at stake, however; knew that they each had a role to play in saving Ferelden from the greatest threat it had known in four hundred years. Now, she had no idea what they were dealing with, not really. The darkspawn were supposed to be retreating into the Deep Roads, she was supposed to rebuild the order and train Wardens to remain vigilant, and yet someone seemed to have other plans. And now this. _

_Kallian had to admit to a certain amount of surprise that none of the people she travelled with during the Blight had killed anyone else in the group. In spite of their vast differences, they had all worked together and managed to get along, but perhaps the overarching sense of purpose that bound them was responsible for that. They had tolerated each other's quirks knowing they could count on the others to protect them when the time came. When arguments flared up, Kallian had rarely needed to get involved. Morrigan and Alistair would stalk off to their respective tents after much name calling; Sten would go into the woods to meditate; Zevran would practice his forms; Wynne would disappear into a book or some sewing; Leliana would go hunting with Lucius; Oghren would drink. They had all followed her, stuck with her, but she had never really understood what inspired them to do so, or why they chose to look to her for guidance and leadership. Yet…it was happening again. _

_Anders had been quite happy to follow her lead, until now at any rate. Nathaniel Howe, who most likely still hated her, respected her position and had come to her defense. Oghren and Mhairi weren't such a surprise. While Oghren was perfectly capable of assuming command, Kallian suspected he preferred to take a position with less accountability. Where Mhairi was concerned, Kallian's impression was that she was far too straight laced to rebel against her commander. She had wanted to be a Warden all her life, too, and didn't seem likely to abandon it so quickly._

_Kallian hadn't given much thought to what she had to do now. So much had happened over the past few days, there really hadn't been a good time, but she found herself wondering if she had been putting it off. She remembered how she felt when Alistair had told her about the taint she had ingested as part of the Joining, the nightmares, the Calling, not being able to have children…she had been angry and devastated and it had taken a few days contemplating her other options – being abused, raped and killed by the city guards in Denerim or trying to survive on her own – to accept these things as the price she'd have to pay for her freedom, such as it was. Would Nate and Anders see this? Would Mhairi still be hopelessly in love with the notion of being a Warden? Not for the first time, doubt entered her mind. Was she _really_ suited to being Warden Commander? Was Anders being insubordinate or just angry, as she had been? Maker, if he was angry now…How was a commander supposed to deal with such things? _

_With a start she realized she had wandered into the Turnoble home and was standing in their kitchen, staring out the window at the legs of whichever unfortunate person it was who hung there. Her stomach turned and she reached to rub it, the sound of her gauntlet scraping across her armor jarring her further out of her reverie. Taking her gloves and helm off and placing them on the counter, she turned to find her Wardens crowded around the nearby table, Anders still clearly agitated. Ser Pounce was perched on his shoulder, peering around the room, his hair standing on end from the electricity that crackled around Anders._

"_Go on, kid. I got yer back," Oghren muttered as he gave Anders a pointed look. _

_She cleared her throat. "Ah…thank you, Oghren, but I don't think that will be necessary." She spoke to Anders. "Look, I was conscripted into the Wardens by Duncan, the Warden Commander at the time, pretty much as you two were," she said, looking at Anders and Nate. Both seemed surprised by this. "He…well, I would have been executed."_

_She began to pace the length of the kitchen. "I didn't know anything about the Grey Wardens before that day. Duncan didn't tell me anything about what I was getting into, save that I would be joining an order that bore a sacred burden, that we protected the lands of men. He told me nothing about the Joining ceremony, said he couldn't tell me anything about what was to come after until I was a Warden, and so we went to Ostagar to join the king's army. We met Alistair and two other recruits…"_

_Kallian briefly described the events leading up to her Joining ceremony, Daveth's death, and how Duncan had killed Ser Jory, before she paused and looked at her Wardens. "Whether or not it seems right, the Grey Wardens have long kept the deadly nature of the Joining ceremony a secret because it stands to reason people wouldn't join if they knew." She began to pace again. _

"_I think Duncan intended to tell me what I am about to tell you, but everything that followed happened so quickly and then…he was gone. They all were." The memory brought tears to her eyes, but she blinked them back and cleared her throat, leaning against a butcher's block. _

"_Alistair and I were badly injured and it wasn't until a few weeks after Ostagar that he told me what he knew of being a Warden, the things Duncan had told him. You will have nightmares, dreams of darkspawn…" The others were nodding._

"_It's worse if you join during a Blight, because you see visions of the arch demon, hear it calling out to the hoard." She shuddered. "Um…the…ah…potion that you drink during the ceremony contains darkspawn and archdemon blood and lyrium, among other things. It's what gives us the ability to sense them and listen to them in our dreams._

_The drawbacks to this are that Wardens do not live as long as normal people. From what I understand, up until now the average Warden could expect to live for thirty years after the Joining, less the older they are at the time, and it is unheard of for two Wardens to have children, the chances of one Warden parenting a child are rather slim."_

_There was a long stretch of silence as Kallian waited for this information to sink in. It was Anders who spoke first. "Why do you say 'up until now'? And how do you explain your pregnancy?"_

_She took a deep breath. "You may have heard the stories of how Alistair and I and our companions took control of Soldier's Peak, repaired a tear in the veil? Well, what isn't common knowledge is that we found a Warden mage there, a man named Avernus. He served under Sophia Dryden, and if you know your Warden history you will know that she was the Warden Commander two hundred years ago." _

"_Wait, that makes Avernus…" _

"_Yes, Anders. It makes him a very old man. He died not too long ago, actually. My point is, he had been holed up in the fortress ever since Dryden was defeated, trying to close up the tear in the veil he had created and looking to improve the Joining ceremony potion. While I was there, I took a vial of it after reading some of his notes." _

_She looked to Oghren. "I guess you could say I was young and foolish, because I got into a drinking contest with Oghren and drank the potion later that night."_

_Oghren blinked and then laughed. "Oh, aye! Alistair chewed my arse off about that, told me never to get ya drunk again!" _

_Kallian pursed her lips and shook her head. "Right, well it was rather by accident that I discovered what you saw today. As a result of drinking that potion, I can will my blood to coat my blades and taint my enemies. I can also move very quickly. Warriors and mages have different abilities, based on their skill sets. I don't know if that makes you a blood mage, Anders, I'm sorry. All I can do is offer you the protection of this order." She didn't give him a chance to say anything, wanting to get her stream of thoughts out of her head. _

"_Ah…Avernus also suggested that the potion would increase my longevity and help with fertility. Your Joining potion was made with an even more refined version of this formula, if I understand correctly, which has the added benefit of being less fatal to new recruits."_

_Again, silence. Mhairi was nodding slowly, a serious look on her face; Oghren was taking another pull on his flask; Nate's brooding frown was back. Pounce had calmed down considerably and Anders, at least, didn't seem to be sparking as much, but he was staring at the floor and she couldn't really gauge his mood._

"_I…am on my own here. Alistair and I didn't hear from any other Wardens until we met Riordan during the Blight and it wasn't until it was all over that the First Warden wrote to me. Even then, he didn't exactly make me feel welcome or offer me any training or support, so I really don't have much to work with here. I believe it is my duty to rebuild the order and to ensure that we are well protected from any future darkspawn threat, and so I've made some decisions that perhaps won't sit well with you, but they were made with the best of intentions and the hope that a greater good would be served._

_You have all, as part of your Joining, had the potion Avernus perfected before he died. Your chances of surviving the Joining were greater, you will live longer than was previously expected for a Warden, and you may yet be able to have children if you so desire."_

_She wished she could put off the worst of it, and paused for a moment to consider her options. Anders caught her indecision, his observations spot on yet again._

"_There's something else, isn't there? You said we have shorter life spans. Why is that?"_

"_The taint. It will eventually kill us. It's too early for you to sense it, but when darkspawn are near, I can feel it as though my blood was trying to get out of my body. A thousand ants may as well be crawling across my shoulders. That…disease will eventually overtake us and we will be called to the Deep Roads. Grey Wardens go there for a final battle with the darkspawn."_

_Anders looked up sharply. "You mean you just…just fight until you die?"_

"_If one doesn't die another way, yes, that's my understanding. Maybe some Wardens commit suicide or…I don't know. Guess where we were going when Alistair remembered to tell me _that_?"_

_Anders forgot his anger for a moment, shock spreading across his face. "No, not…"_

"_Yeah. To the Deep Roads, where we saw a broodmother and the archdemon and giant spiders…" She shuddered and rolled her shoulders. "That was _months_ after he had told me everything else. I still hate him for that." She kicked her foot at the floor, remembering how angry and afraid she had been then._

"_Look, I expect you might feel as though I've betrayed you, that I've taken something from you or done something to you, and you've got the right to react to this situation however you see fit. But here's the thing. I spent a few days going over and over this myself, and I realized this was the best thing that could have happened to me. I am an elf, from the Denerim alienage, and I would have died if Duncan hadn't conscripted me. Maker's balls, I would have died a hundred times over, I'm certain. Duncan saved my life and it happened to me for a reason. I choose to believe that and I choose to do this because not everyone can, and I have seen what lies ahead if I do not."_

_Anders made to say something, but she raised her hand. "I was in the Tower. Granted, I saw it at its absolute lowest point the first time I was there, what with the Templars wanting to invoke the Rite of Annulment. I'm not going to pretend that I know you, Anders, but I think I have some idea what it is you sought to escape. Aside from having strong feelings about blood magic, you seek _freedom_, true freedom, and I denied you that freedom when I withheld information from you. It won't happen again, on that you have my word."_

_A moment passed before Anders spoke again. "I…well. I don't know what to say. You really suck the joy out of being angry at a person, but I…" He shrugged, struggling to let go of the last of his anger. "I have some things to think about."_

_She nodded, a feeling of great relief washing over her. "As do we all, I suspect. You and I need to talk further, but does anyone else have anything to say? Questions to ask?" She surveyed the group._

_Mhairi, true to Kallian's assessment of her character, was supportive. "I have wanted to be a Grey Warden all my life, Commander, and I am as committed now as I ever was." _

"_Would you have let me go?" Nate surprised her with the question and Kallian had to think about it for a moment. _

"_I really don't know. You presented me with the perfect opportunity to recruit a talent, just as Anders did, and I couldn't let it get away from me."_

_She thought he looked uncomfortable with the compliment for the briefest of moments before he simply nodded and relaxed against the counter behind him. _

_Oghren looked around the room. "What are we waitin' around for? Don't we have work to do?"_

_Kallian nodded slowly. "Yes, we have a funeral pyre to set up and then we should return to Vigil's Keep."_

There had still been tension between her and Anders, but before long they ran into a group of bandits who were trying to rob a young female merchant. As it turned out, she was heading to the keep and was travelling with them now. The sound of the gate drawing open nearly brought tears to Kallian's eyes and she gratefully accepted the guardsman's help dismounting. She was home.

xXx

It was after midnight when Zevran was awoken by a knock on the door. The kitchen maid, Bronwyn, had been roused from bed and sent to awaken him.

"My lord," she said as she curtsied when he opened the door. "The Warden Commander and the others have arrived. They are in the armory."

He barely acknowledged her as he ran to the armory, Lucius at his heels.

xXx

"Kalli?"

He found her alone in the armory, looking exhausted, her clothing rumpled and bloody, her hair coming out of its braid. Her face was dirty and streaked and she looked…damp. She stood in front of a mirror, hands on her belly, regarding her reflection.

"What is it? What happened?" he asked as he stood by her.

"We got caught in the rain," she muttered.

"Well, that explains why you are wet." He looked into her eyes and worried at the sadness he saw there. "Did something happen?"

Kallian shook her head. "We're all fine, our child, everyone, but…I…" Tears rolled down her cheeks. "We couldn't save the Turnobles."

Zevran hoped this, combined with exhaustion and her advancing pregnancy, was the source of his wife's distress. "Let me help you get cleaned up, tesora."

She nodded slowly. "Please."

Zevran carried her back to their chambers, pausing to ask Bronwyn to bring them some food when he spotted her in the hallway. He undressed Kallian and ran a bath for her, grateful for the runes Ambassador Cera had installed at the edge of the tub. Before long, Kallian was soaking in steaming water scented with lavender. Zevran bathed her, massaged her neck and shoulders, and rinsed her off. Pulling her out of the tub, he wrapped her in a large drying towel and carried her to their bed.

After settling her down and pulling the sheets around her, he went to their sitting room to find that Bronwyn had delivered a tray of steaming potato and leek soup with large chunks of bread and cheese, and two mugs of ale, which he brought to Kallian's side. "Do you want anything else?"

Kallian shook her head and began to dig into her dinner. She hadn't realized just how hungry she was until half of it was gone and she saw Zevran was watching her with a somewhat amused expression on his face. She paused, had a sip of ale and wiped her mouth.

"Our mission started out well enough. The ride there was good. Nate was grumpy, but the rest of us were joking, enjoying ourselves. Even Mhairi." She smiled wistfully. "It reminded me of the Blight, the parts that weren't so bad, anyway…"

She told him everything, finishing her meal as she talked, watching him closely. The first signs of tension appeared around his eyes when she related Anders' reaction to her abilities and their subsequent discussion.

"Would you like me to have a talk with him?" There was a menacing growl in his voice.

Kallian twisted around so she could look into his eyes. "I love you for asking, but no, _absolutely not_. It's my command, I will handle it. While I did appreciate their support, it's bad enough the others felt they had to step in to protect me." She shook her head, a small grin on her lips.

He was quiet for a moment before reaching out to touch her cheek. "As you wish."

Kallian leaned into Zevran's hand and ceased to think of anything other than him. His hands on her face, his lips on hers, his body holding her close. They made love and fell asleep in each others' arms.

* * *

**A/N:** After a lengthy absence from FF, I am back. Yes, DA2 did provide a significant distraction for a while, but I was also stuck in the middle of a labour dispute between my employer and another union on campus, so I was busy feeling sorry for myself, looking for part time work and doing the required union duties for strike pay thing, all of which was far more tiring than I would like to admit. Now that I have adjusted my attitude, am back at work and significantly relieved to see we'll make our next mortgage payment, my muse has returned…sort of.

This chapter was hard for me to write, but here it is. I love hearing from you, so please feel free to comment and review. FYI - After tinkering around with a translator, I decided to use Turkish as Tevinter for no other reason than it looked interesting.


	5. The Trouble with Anders

**The Trouble with Anders**

26 Harvestmere, 9:30

Kallian yawned and stretched as she padded down the hallway to the stairs and down to the main floor, Lucius at her heels. As they turned down the last hallway to the kitchens a small ball of orange fur hissed at them and backed up against the wall. Lucius assumed a less threatening posture, lowering himself to the floor, head on his paws. Kallian watched with great amusement as Ser Pounce slowly crept toward Lucius, a tentative paw striking out to assess the danger. Finally satisfied that the mabari could be trusted, the kitten rubbed up against Lucius' large jaw, his purring audible from where Kallian stood. A moment later, Anders appeared to her right in the doorway to the kitchen, holding a small bowl of fish mixed with egg.

"Oh. Um…Commander." He looked uncharacteristically awkward.

Kallian smiled, determined not to let the previous day's events linger between them for long. "Good morning, Anders. That looks…_totally_ unappealing. I hope it's for Pounce."

She looked down to find that the kitten had curled up on Lucius' front legs, under his chin, and appeared to be dozing. The hound had pulled his head back as far as he could in an effort to see Ser Pounce, but couldn't, and looked up at her as if to beg for help. She and Anders began laughing and they both crouched down at the same time to collect the kitten. Their knees knocked together, putting them both off balance and sending them to the floor. Anders saved the saucer, but its the contents sloshed out onto the stone. Pounce stirred, meowed loudly as if to object to the treatment of his breakfast, and ran to the goopy mess, lapping it up eagerly. Lucius looked greatly relieved and stood, carefully stepping around the cat as he continued to the kitchen.

Anders jumped up and extended a hand to Kallian, pulling her onto her feet. "Are you all right? I'm so sorry." He was reaching for her belly, his hand glowing a pale blue, when he pulled back. "Oh. I…ah, I shouldn't presume…"

Kallian put a hand on her stomach. "Anders, I fell on my ass. I did that a few times yesterday from further off the ground and we both survived just fine."

"You are lucky, but you can't always count on that, Commander." Anders replied gently, the spirit healer in him taking over. "Pregnancy can be a tricky thing, and the…um…your friend…"

"I know, but do you?" Her throat tightened. She had rarely felt the presence of the fade spirit within her over the past several days, whereas Wynne had always been acutely aware of it. Perhaps that was because she was a mage, but Kallian didn't find that notion very reassuring and Anders had just confirmed she was right to be concerned. Not for the first time she feared how her baby would fare when the spirit left her, for that time must be drawing near, and how this life of hers would affect the child.

"I have a strong connection to the Fade and I've healed you," he explained with a shrug. Anders put a hand on her shoulder. "Look, I can see you're worried, and I didn't mean to upset you. Petra's an excellent midwife and we've both delivered babies, so you're in good hands. But you will eventually have to stop running into the thick of it, okay? Let that insane dwarf and Mhairi take the front line."

She smiled and took a deep breath, nodding. "Okay. Thank you, Anders."

Kallian waved a hand toward the kitchen and they stepped into the brightly lit and lively room. She paused to take in the atmosphere. The air smelled of fresh bread and sausages, and a large fire burned in the hearth. Enchanted lanterns illuminated the far corners of the room and there was a bustle of activity going on. Dorothy, who ran the kitchen and household staff, was giving Bronwyn, Elspeth and Alison a list of duties for the day. Mhairi, Nate and Oghren were serving themselves breakfast while a group of soldiers sat at a nearby table finishing theirs. Several people saw her enter the room and waved or called out. It was warm and comforting to Kallian, and just as she was soaking up this feeling, strong arms slid around her waist and the smell of Zevran's soap and leathers enveloped her.

She wrapped her arms around his and leaned back to kiss his cheek. "Buongiorno, mio marito."

Inhaling the scent of her hair and giving her a quick squeeze before releasing her, Zevran smiled and kissed Kallian's forehead. "Buongiorno, tesora."

"I'm famished. I need a good meal before we leave for Amaranthine and I wanted to talk to you and Mhairi about training routines. Anders, I'd like you to join Nate, Oghren and I in Amaranthine. You'll all need equipment and armor, potions, that sort of thing."

"Oh…I don't have…" Anders started, rubbing the back of his neck.

Kallian shook her head, imagining he didn't have much money or didn't think he needed anything. "As your Commander, it is my responsibility to ensure that all of you have good equipment, Anders. How many sets of robes do you have? Surely you've noticed your staff has splinters?" She raised an eyebrow at him and waited for a response.

"Once her mind is made up, there is little point in arguing with her," Zevran offered.

Anders laughed and bowed to Kallian. "Very well, my lady, I will be ready to leave when you are." With a flourish he left the kitchen.

Zevran pulled Kallian close and walked her to the buffet of food. "He is no longer quite so annoyed with you. Perhaps this more intelligent variety of darkspawn will fall prey to your considerable powers of persuasion."

"Ha!" She began to fill a plate. "If only that were possible."

xXx

While the sun was still low on the horizon, Kallian departed the keep in the company of several household members, armed with a list of supplies to purchase and the sovereign with which to do it. In addition to this and the shopping Kallian had planned, Varel had given her notices to post announcing that the keep's guard and the Grey Wardens were recruiting members, and she would be collecting Ser Aiden and the wagon of possessions they had left in the city on the way to Soldier's Peak.

The Wardens were on foot, having left their horses behind to recover from the previous day's encounters with darkspawn, with Lucius chasing Rosa around in what was beginning to resemble a courtship dance. Dorothy and the keep's primary merchant, Yuriah, rode in the oxen-pulled wagon they accompanied, and Ser Marcus and Ser Thomas joined them to provide additional security. The skies were clear and the road was nearly perfect for such travel, neither too hard nor too soft for the wagon's wheels to navigate comfortably. They expected to arrive by early afternoon and planned to stay at least one night, perhaps two.

The journey was fairly uneventful, in spite of evidence that there had been darkspawn attacks along the road. Abandoned homes and burned crops were visible at numerous points along the way. Much to Kallian's dismay, they came upon a group of six dead soldiers who wore the same armor as those of Vigil's Keep and they quickly gathered up any personal effects they could find, as well as the soldiers' armor. While Kallian offered a prayer to the Maker for their souls, Anders created a firestorm that served as a funeral pyre, and when the corpses had been reduced to ashes, they continued on.

xXx

"You want me to _what_?" Anders asked sharply.

Kallian took a deep breath. "I would like you to translate Avernus' texts for me. I'm assuming that would be easier than my learning to read Tevinter." She winced as she heard herself speak. Sarcasm wouldn't get her very far, but something about Anders made her quick to respond in kind to his mood.

Anders offered up a slight huffing sound in response, his brows pulled close together.

"Anders, I'm not asking you to _learn_ blood magic or, Maker forbid, _use_ it, but doesn't it seem reasonable that you should learn what these new skills you've acquired are and how to control them if you don't want to use them? That…_thing_ I do, I discovered that by accident."

"Completely foolish of you to drink a potion without knowing what it would do," Anders mumbled.

Kallian took another deep breath and stared at the sky for a moment. "Yes, yes, thank you for reminding me of that, _yet again_. As though nearly everyone else I know didn't say the exact same thing. _Moving on_, I need this done for the sake of the order and as the Senior Mage of the Ferelden Grey Wardens does it not make sense that you should be the one to undertake such a task?"

"I'm the _only_ mage of the Ferelden Grey Wardens," Anders shot back. "And how could I not _learn_ it if I'm _reading_ it?"

Kallian snorted. "I'll grant you have a point there…"

"Two. I have _two_ points there."

"…but so do I. Tell me, have you ever wanted to take control of someone's mind, make them do your bidding?"

"Of course not." Anders muttered.

"Kill someone who wasn't trying to kill _you_?"

"No…not until very, _very_ recently," he offered as he glared at her.

"Watch it, I could have you thrown in the cells when we get back to the keep. My point is, would reading a blood mage's journals and research notes suddenly make you inclined to take control of someone's mind or kill them to bolster your own power?"

Anders' jaw flexed. "No, perhaps not."

"Pfft. Most likely not. I've tracked down and killed blood mages, Anders. A blood mage slaver took many of my people to Tevinter and almost got my father, too, so don't think I don't know how bad they can be. Having said that, I think the _mage_ who wields the magic, not the magic itself, is the problem. If you don't trust yourself to so much as read this stuff without going insane and turning us all into your blood slaves, fine, _just say so_. Otherwise, please give the matter some thought instead of rejecting it outright. I'll have it done, one way or another." She picked up her pace and jumped onto the front of the wagon to ride with Dorothy and Yuriah.

Nathaniel, who had been lagging behind them, stepped forward, his voice low. "I would be careful if I were you, mage. You are lucky she tolerates your attitude, but I do not think she is the one you need to worry about. I imagine her husband is not a man to be trifled with."

"And what do you mean by _that_?"

Howe shook his head. "I have no doubt he knows what happened between the two of you yesterday and that he'll hear about this, too. Knowing what he is, what they obviously mean to one another, and the way he was watching _you_ this morning, I should think it obvious what I mean by _that_."

Anders paused. "The way he was _watching_ me?"

For the first time since they had met, Howe smiled. "No wonder you haven't managed to stay free for long, mage."

"Oh, bugger off, Howe," Anders growled, staking off to the other side of the wagon.

Oghren chuckled and took a swig from his flask. "Well, this trip got interesting pretty quick."

xXx

Kallian raised her hand and stopped, the rest of her group slowly coming to a halt around her. She shielded her eyes from the sun and surveyed the group of refugees who had settled in a makeshift community outside the walls of the city. It was all too similar to many she had seen during the Blight. Tents and wagons lined either side of the road. Refugees were huddled together in groups near small fires or milling about engaged in various chores or games. Others appeared to be waiting for a moment such as this, when someone came by and they could beg for a copper or two. Beyond this community, she could see the gates of the city, closed and more heavily guarded than those of Denerim, which was a much larger city. Kallian spotted a young elven woman nearby with a sleeping toddler in her arms and approached her.

"Excuse me, I'm Warden-Commander Arainai. Can you tell me what's going on here?"

The woman looked startled and clutched her child closer. "The Warden-Commander?" she asked nervously. "H-hero of Ferelden?"

While appearing gracious, smiling and nodding, Kallian groaned inwardly. The use of titles and the sense of awe, and sometimes hatred, she occasionally encountered continued to make her feel uncomfortable and she thought of Alistair.

The woman's eyes grew wide and she offered a quick curtsey. "Oh, I…well, my lady, we are all displaced by the Blight and darkspawn, some from as far as Lothering, some from nearby. Many of us have a skill or trade we hope to offer, but they won't allow us into the city." Her daughter stirred and eyed Kallian with sleepy curiosity.

Kallian's lips pursed together and she slowly eyed her team members. Her gaze fell back to the young woman, whose daughter was reaching out to grab Kallian's hair. She laughed and took the girl's hand in hers.

"What is your name?"

"I am Myriani, and this is my daughter Talindra."

"And what trade or skill do you have to offer, Myriani?"

Myriani obviously understood an opportunity when it presented itself and smiled brightly. "I cultivate herbs for medicinal, culinary and cosmetic use. I can make potions, soaps, essential oils and other products. I have some plants in our wagon and my own seed collection. I could have a garden ready by Drakonis or sooner, if I were to plant in a greenhouse or solarium."

Kallian nodded slowly as she considered this information. "I have a proposition for you, Myriani…"

Within the hour, Myriani and three humans had agreed to return to Vigil's Keep with Kallian. Two brothers, Phillip and Aaron, a brew master and a hops and barely farmer respectively, and a carpenter named Myles would be joining them, along with their wives and two more children. The specific details were to be worked out upon return to the keep, but Kallian proposed that anyone who produced goods would provide a portion of their wares to the keep in exchange for a home in which to live and space to work. After keeping a portion for their own use, the keep's merchants would receive rights of first refusal on all surplus goods and anything left would be shipped to the City of Amaranthine for sale, with the profits going back to the craftsmen and women. Kallian offered their wives the possibility of employment within the keep as housekeeping or kitchen staff. Her travelling companions were both amused and amazed by her luck in finding these people and convincing them to take a chance on her by relocating yet again.

As they continued towards the gates to the City of Amaranthine, Kallian searched the crowd for a human named Colbert and his elven friend Micah, two hunters Captain Garevel had suggested she find. There was a rumor that these two had found an entrance to the Deep Roads. The two men were near the gates to the city and Colbert was more than willing to give them all the information they needed to find it, and even marked the location of Knotwood Hills on Kallian's map. The area was to the west of Vigil's Keep. Micah remained quiet during the entire conversation, eying Kallian from behind Colbert's shoulder.

Their story was both amusing and frightening. Micah had fallen into the chasm and was screaming hysterically, Colbert fell in trying to save him, and then a group of darkspawn appeared from further into the hole on their way to the surface. The beasts were so engrossed in whatever it was they were doing that they completely ignored the two men who were, by this point, both yelling in pain and fear. Kallian couldn't imagine a time when she had ever thought the darkspawn would ignore her. It was highly unusual for the darkspawn to pass up men to taint or eat or just plain rip apart, and this was cause for concern, in her opinion. The others agreed.

It took them another hour to get into the city, and not just because of the additional security posted at the gates due to a problem with smugglers. While speaking with the Captain of the Guard, Kallian had pulled her journal, a quill and a small bottle of ink out of her pack and made several notes, listing people to talk to, places to go, errands to run and anything else she thought was worth noting.

"This is going to take _forever_," Anders groaned as he watched Kallian and the Captain talk.

Oghren nudged the mage with an elbow. "Get used to it, Sparklefingers. The kid can't say no to someone in need and you could be one of those people some day." He smiled to himself as Anders muttered unhappily and turned his attention back to his fingernails.

xXx

By mid-afternoon, they arrived at the guest house where Ser Aiden had been staying. Kallian arranged rooms for them and began issuing orders. Dorothy and Yuriah were to go shopping, the soldiers would post the recruitment notices and keep an eye open for any suspicious activity, and she would take the Wardens and mabari shopping for equipment. They were all to meet back at the guest house for dinner at sunset. Kallian turned an eye to the skies and estimated they had about three hours at most. Anything they couldn't get done in that amount of time could be left for the next day.

They were walking around the outer ring of the city toward the market when they were stopped.

"Oy, Anders," an elven woman dressed in leather armor called out as they neared a corner of the city wall.

The mage started and stopped to look at the woman more closely. "Namaya? You're still here?"

"Unlike some, I keep my promises." She stepped forward, looking around furtively. "You were right. The cache is here."

"In Amaranthine?"

The woman rolled her eyes at him. "Yes. Here's what you need to know. Me, I'm done with mages." She emphasized her last statement by slashing a hand through the air in a chopping motion.

Namaya handed Anders a piece of parchment and turned to Kallian. "A word of advice. _Don't_ let him sweet talk you." She stalked off down the street and around a corner, out of sight.

Anders turned around slowly to find Kallian watching him, her eyes wide with amusement. "Um…I guess that requires an explanation."

Kallian folded her arms across her chest and looked at Anders, a smile tugging at her lips. "I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that you somehow got into and right back out of her good graces."

"Yes, yes, I did, but while I was in, it was _great_," he sighed, looking in the direction Namaya had gone.

Kallian cleared her throat and nodded at the parchment.

"Ah…right. It's my phylactery," Anders whispered. "I'd heard rumours that the Templars moved the Denerim cache during the Blight, and apparently it's here." He looked at the parchment he held. "It's in a warehouse…on the opposite side of town. If you don't mind, I'd like to look into this." He was backing up and turning to go when Kallian caught him by the wrist.

"Are you crazy?"

Anders straightened up to his full height, pulling his arm from Kallian's grasp, and glared down at her. "Well, I am a big boy, I can handle myself."

"Don't be daft!" she hissed at him. "_That_ was a woman scorned, if I ever saw one, and it hasn't occurred to you that this might be a bad idea? I am _not_ going to let you…"

"_Let_ me? _You_ aren't a mage, you don't know what it's like…"

"…do this _alone_, you fool!" She stamped her foot down and put her hands on her hips, glaring up at him.

"…to be caged and…and…what?" He stared at her for a moment before relaxing his posture, a look of shame passing over his face. "Oh, I…ah…hmm."

"What'd I tell ya?" Oghren asked with a belch.

"Pfft. Let's go take care of this and then just go back to the guest house. I'm bloody hungry and not in any mood to go shopping now."

xXx

_Shit, shit, shit, I knew it,_ Kallian thought to herself, wondering if now would be a bad time to say 'I told you so'. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Anders was already thinking it. It had been too easy to get into the warehouse, and it was too empty, and there in the back room, waiting for them, was Ser Rylock and three other Templars.

"And here I almost believed the infamous Anders wouldn't take the bait.

Anders recovered himself. "Ha, yes, I suppose I should have known it would be you."

Rylock turned to Kallian. "You made a poor choice with this one, Commander. Anders will never submit, not to us and not to you."

For Anders, this was the moment of truth. He wondered if he'd been enough of a pain in the ass for Kallian to give up on him right here and now, but she didn't.

"He's made a fine Grey Warden so far," Kallian replied, her voice far more calm than Anders would have expected.

Rylock smiled. "So far, yes. I'll make sure this murderer is never a bother to anyone ever again."

"What? You can't arrest me! King Alistair allowed my conscription," Anders argued, shooting glances at Kallian, Nathaniel and Oghren.

Rylock smiled. "The Chantry supersedes the crown in this matter. You cannot hide within the Grey Wardens' ranks."

"Oh, there's where you're wrong, Rylock. Anders will be staying with us." Kallian's tone was no longer pleasant and she had shifted her posture to a more defensive stance.

"Hardly surprising," Rylock sneered. "The Grey Wardens have ever been a haven for criminals and maleficar. I do not know how you inspire such loyalty, Anders, but it will avail you naught. Now you come with us."

"You _bitch_," Kallian growled as the Templars drew their swords.

In the ensuing skirmish, Kallian was barely able to keep track of who was doing what. With eight people and two mabari fighting in the confined space, it was all she could do to keep an eye on the swords, axes and maces swinging about. Everyone was shouting, blades were clashing, and the familiar taste of Anders casting a spell was on her tongue. Quite suddenly, he simply fell to the floor, struck by a holy smite, and a moment later Rylock was crouched over him slamming the pommel of her sword against his head. Before she was able to lift her sword a second time, an arrow pierced her neck from the right and she crumpled to the floor with a gurgle, landing on Anders. Seeing Nate to her left, Kallian wondered who had shot Rylock, but didn't have time to look. A Templar was rushing at her and she ducked down and rolled away, letting Oghren nearly cut the man in two with his battle axe. The two hounds had caught the third Templar and were attacking him viciously. Kallian danced around their final enemy until she was able to kick him soundly in the groin. She pushed a dagger into his face as he leaned forward with the force of her kick and it was over.

"Anders!" Kallian rushed to his side and with Nate and Oghren's help they pulled Rylock off him.

She pressed her fingers to his neck while bending down to listen to his breathing. His pulse was steady. "Anders?" The mage groaned and stirred and she sighed with relief.

Just as she was straining to see or hear any signs of their guest, she felt Nate's hand on her right shoulder. He pushed slightly, pointing to Lucius who was sitting and staring toward the main room of the warehouse, his tail wagging.

She nodded slowly, confused by the hound's reaction, and finally felt something – a very gentle breeze as someone moved. The faint smell of Andraste's Grace wafted past her. _It can't be._

"Kallian, mon amie," a voice purred from the shadows. "Life is ever exciting with you, non?" Leliana stepped into the light and crouched at Kallian's side, pressing an injury kit to the wound on Anders' head.

She said hello to Oghren as though they had just seen each other the day before and nothing was amiss. The dwarf beamed back at her and raised his flask to her.

"Good to see ya."

"Leli, what are you…?" Kallian shook her head and wrapped an arm around the bard's shoulders. "No, never mind, I'm really happy to see you, and we can talk later. Right now we need to take care of this mess."

Anders groaned and she bent down to speak to him. "Anders, Rylock got you in the head with a pommel strike after you were down, so be careful."

"I know. A holy smite is like a punch in the heart and stomach that leaves me completely unable to use magic, but she got me before I could catch my breath and get out of the way. Are they…" Anders tried to sit up. He groaned again and clutched his head.

"They're dead, Anders. Come on, we need to get you out of here." She paused as Anders stared at her, not moving. "What?"

"I…well, I figured you might turn me in."

"Why, because you're such a pain in the ass?" He laughed sharply at her choice of words and winced.

"Because you're like the older brother I never wanted? Hmm. You know, now that I think about it…" She paused and smiled at Anders' expression. "I'm kidding, Anders. You're a friend. Friends stick up for one another. Besides, infuriating as you are, I need you."

"Well, I…I thank you." He turned on his side and slowly picked himself up off the ground. "Ow, my head…oh, hello." His eyes fell on Leliana. "And who are _you_?"

"Andraste's tits, Anders, do you ever stop?" Kallian groaned as she offered him a steadying hand.

"Hey, I almost got dragged off to be executed!"

"Partly because you were got involved with a woman and it ended badly," she grumbled.

Anders adjusted his robes, scowling at Kallian. "Maybe Namaya didn't know this was a set up."

"Are you really so…"

Leliana interrupted them with a giggle. "Shush, mes amis. I must go to the Chantry of our Lady Redeemer to advise the Revered Mother that she had rogue Templars in her midst who directly defied the King's wishes and the Warden Commander's authority by attempting to murder a Grey Warden. I know her personally, she will not question this. You, however, must move. If you slip out the back door and down the side street, there is a sheltered yard where you could wash yourselves and rest."

Kallian embraced her friend and kissed her cheek. "Thank you. I'll assume you know we are at the Crow and Gate guest house and that you'll join us this evening?"

"Oui, mon amie, I will be there." Leliana smiled warmly, kissing Kallian's cheek. Turning to blow a kiss at Oghren, she slipped out of the warehouse and was gone.

Following Leliana's advice, they left the warehouse and found shelter down the alley. To counteract the effects of the holy smite without becoming lyrium addled, Anders had to consume a few lyrium potions slowly over a period of an hour before he was finally able to use a simple healing spell on his head. While they waited, Nate stole a bucket of water and a rag from a nearby laundry house and they cleaned themselves up as best they could. When they were finally ready, they gathered their things and continued down the side streets.

As they walked, Kallian felt something ripple through her abdomen, a contraction of her muscles. It wasn't painful, but she cried out in shock and stopped to reach out for support. Fear filled her eyes as she turned to Anders.

Nate and Oghren steadied her as Anders came to her side, placing a hand at the small of her back. A tingle there and the taste of apples on her tongue and he was done. "I think this is just dehydration, nothing to be alarmed about." He reached for his water skin and gave it to her, encouraging her to drink as much as she could. "You need to drink lots of water and have ale now and then. Only the occasional drink, though, for your health. None of this getting drunk and drinking strange potions business. It wouldn't do to give birth to the next village idiot."

Kallian giggled, but another contraction stopped her short. She could feel panic beginning to blossom in her chest and she felt as though she couldn't breathe. Anders was crouching down, slinging her arm over his shoulders and picking her up before she could protest.

"Just a precaution, Commander. I'll get you to your room and take a better look at you. Just breathe, okay? In…out…in…good girl…in…sleep…out…sleep…in…"

The sound of Anders' voice soothed her. Just for a moment she struggled against the overwhelming desire to fall asleep, but it became too much for her and she let the darkness overcome her.

Anders turned to Nate and Oghren. "We need to get her back to the Crow and Gate now so I can fully examine her. Nate, I need you to run ahead and have some things prepared for our arrival."

"You said it was nothing to be alarmed about." Oghren's voice betrayed the same concern Nate felt.

"And it may yet be, but she is presenting other symptoms and I need to be sure I know what's going on before I do anything, now move."

After getting Nate to remember a short list of items Anders would need, the rogue vanished into the shadows of a nearby alley while Anders and Oghren continued through the city toward the guest house.

* * *

**A/N:** Buongiorno, mio marito – Good morning, my husband. Tesora – darling, or treasure.

It's funny how this process works. In spite of my plans, for reasons I haven't quite figured out yet, when I put Kallian and Anders together, they just start picking at each other like siblings.

My thanks to Zevgirl who continues to allow me to bounce ideas her way and who pre-screens my chapters on occasion, to my 'regulars', and to everyone who has added me to an alert or favorites list. It's nice to see folks are still reading 'old school' fanfiction with DA2 out there…! I love hearing from readers, it keeps me motivated, so please feel free to comment/review. Cheers!


	6. The Trouble with Kallian

**The Trouble with Kallian**

Kallian had never appreciated being put to sleep, whether it was with a potion or a mage's touch. Demons had rendered her unconscious a few times during the Blight and for days afterward she'd had nightmares of what they might have done to her while she was unconscious. With her companions' reassurances, her nightmares had returned to the usual darkspawn variety, but the fear had lingered. Even when Wynne had perfectly justifiable reasons to do it in Haven, after Kallian had been shot in the shoulder with an arrow, she had felt violated and vulnerable and didn't speak to Wynne for days. Having Anders knock her out in Amaranthine was no different. Already on edge, when she awoke to find herself surrounded by Leliana, Dorothy and Anders, she burst into tears.

Leliana pulled her into a warm embrace, pressing a handkerchief into her hand. "Shh, mon amie. Your wee one is fine, but you must listen to Anders, non?"

Kallian looked down to see she was dressed in her leggings and tunic and relaxed slightly. Dorothy smiled and rubbed Kallian's shoulder, offering to bring up some food and drink as she slipped out of the room. Lucius was sitting in the corner, keeping an alert eye on everyone. Anders was on a chair at her bedside, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, his fingers steepled together and resting against his chin. She wanted to hit him, run from him, beg him to tell her everything was fine, all at the same time, and the conflicting emotions threatened to undo her. Trying to contain herself, she took a few deep breaths, dried her face and grabbed onto the first neutral thought that entered her mind.

"But why are you here, Leli? I thought you and Brother Genitivi…"

Leliana took Kallian's hands in her own and swept her thumbs across the backs of them. "I am here to do research, before we leave for Haven, but that is not important. We can talk later."

Kallian shifted her gaze to Anders, who smiled and sat up straight, opening his mouth to speak. She cut him off.

"_You_…don't you _ever_…" she pursed her lips together with frustration and pulled the bed sheets up around her body. "Explain yourself."

Anders sighed and leaned back in his chair. "As Senior Mage of the Ferelden Grey Wardens…"

A short laugh slipped from Kallian's lips. "Ha, so you like the title when it suits you."

He chose not to take the bait, instead speaking over her. "…I thought it was in your best interest to sedate you and bring you back here for treatment as quickly as possible. You were dehydrated and threatening to miscarry, and looked about to panic on top of every…"

Kallian pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs, fresh tears flowing down her cheeks.

"Well, you're fine _now_," Anders jumped up and sat beside Leliana, reaching out to Kallian. "Breathe…"

Kallian swatted his hand away. "Don't you _dare_ put me to sleep again, I _hate_ that!"

He pulled back with a laugh, his hands in the air. "I wasn't…I _won't_, I promise. Not without your permission, anyway," he added with a grin. "Oh, calm down, you aren't doing yourself any favors. Just relax."

She nodded slowly and tried to do as he said, relaxing her posture and taking a few deep breaths. Leliana slipped an arm around her shoulders, and the added support calmed her. "Wh-what happened?"

"You were having contractions as a result of dehydration, and that could have led to a miscarriage. Tell me, how often does Petra examine you?"

Kallian frowned. "She's seen me two or three times so far, I think, since my recovery. She wants to see me when we return to the keep. Why?"

"Hmm. She has told you that it is important for you to drink water, right?" Kallian nodded. "This is why. But now that I think on it, I haven't seen you drinking much. Tea, for the morning sickness, certainly, but while we've been out in the field, hardly anything." He passed a water skin to her. "You _must_ drink lots of water every day, Kallian, or this could happen again and it is very likely that you will lose your baby. As tough as you are, that child is not, and you are far from invincible. Do you understand me?"

She suddenly felt as though she were a child again, getting into trouble with Soris and Shianni. She could almost picture her father standing over them, waving a stern finger while lecturing them about one wrongdoing or another. Kallian drank from the water skin.

Anders continued his lecture. "You need to make sure you're getting enough food and rest, and you have to be more careful when we're out in the field. You're thirteen weeks along and I think you should have birthed the babe by mid-Drakonis, early Cloudreach at the latest. Truly, you should step down from your duties by Guardian." With that, he stood and smoothed out his robes, missing the look of anger that crossed Kallian's face.

"_Step down from my duties_?" she asked with a sharp tone. Lucius growled and lowered himself onto the floor.

Anders looked up and frowned at Kallian's expression. "What, do you honestly think it's a good idea to be traipsing around fighting with darkspawn while your belly is full with child? Do you have any idea how you'll be feeling by then?"

"Um…no, I don't know how I'll be feeling by then because I've never been pregnant before!"

"Well, elven women are different, of course, but your belly will _much_ larger than it is now, your ankles will be swollen, I expect you'll be _terribly_ cranky _all_ the time…"

Leliana watched with amusement as the two bickered about Kallian's fitness to serve as an active Grey Warden while pregnant. Dorothy and a servant from the kitchen brought up trays of food and left again. The debate continued until Kallian absentmindedly nibbled on a chunk of cheese and was so distracted by her hunger that she all but forgot everything else. Anders took that opportunity to slip out of the room with some stew and bread, closing the door behind him.

When she was finished eating, Kallian let Leliana move their trays to the nearby table while she settled back against the pillows. A pang of shame ran through her as she ran her hands over her abdomen and thought of Zevran. Until now she hadn't given too much thought to the possibility that she could lose their child, whether through misfortune, battle or her own foolishness, and the thought of it broke her heart. _How could I face him?_

Leliana watched as Kallian got lost in her thoughts, fear and sadness playing across her delicate features. When the elf finally looked up at her again, she quirked an eyebrow.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" Kallian asked, her voice tight.

"Of course, mon amie," Leliana purred as she sat next to Kallian and stretched her legs out on the bed. "Tell me what is bothering you."

"I…I don't know, Leli. This…" she rubbed her stomach and shrugged. "…hardly seems real. I mean, all the symptoms are there, two mages have confirmed it, and I don't doubt it. But it doesn't feel real yet, you know? And the thought of…I almost lost him, Leli. What if I had? How could I face Zevran? He'd be so disappointed." She frowned and brushed a tear from her cheek.

Leliana put an arm around Kallian's shoulders and pulled her into a hug. "Do not be so foolish as to think he would love you any less, Kallian. You have learned that you simply must take better care of yourself, and you will, non? You will be fine, Kalli."

Kallian shifted to face Leliana. "I didn't really think about this, about being Warden Commander. I mean I _did_, when Alistair and I first talked about it, but when I found out I was pregnant, I didn't rethink it and maybe I should have. This life of mine is crazy, and I'm going to drag a child along with me? What if something happens to him? Or to me? What if…"

With a gentle smile and a shake of her head, Leliana put a finger over Kallian's lips. "The pregnant women I have known experienced periods of doubt and fear, but for all the uncertainty that being a Warden will bring to your life, you have Zevran, your family and friends, and your Wardens. And you live in a fortified keep, non?"

"Pfft! _That's_ not such a great argument. It's built over an entrance to the Deep Roads."

Leliana laughed, the sound bringing a smile to Kallian's lips. "I assume you are getting that fixed?"

"Well, yeah, of course."Kallian finally laughed and let go of her worries, leaning back against her pillows once more. "It isn't all that bad, really, and might not be such a terrible place to raise a child. Nate has daddy issues, but he kind of turned out okay…"

The two friends talked late into the night about all that had happened since Alistair's coronation, until Kallian could no longer keep her eyes open. As she drifted off, her head on Leliana's shoulder, she mumbled "I want to know why you're really here, Leli."

"Oui, mon amie, I know. I will tell you. Bon nuit." Leli kissed her friend's forehead and nodded off to sleep herself.

xXx

_27 Harvestmere, 9:30_

_Maker, there are many things to do here in Amaranthine. There are smugglers, bandits, and rogue mages to contend with, I need to speak to someone named Mervis about problems along the trade route, Nate and Anders have already been to the Chanter's board and accepted several jobs, and who knows what else we'll discover along the way. We still need to get armor and weapons for Nate, Oghren and Anders, and I want to check the Crown and Lion to see if Kristoff stayed there._

_My mind still dwells on the health and safety of my unborn child and I wish to be done here as quickly as possible so that we may return to the keep. Being away from Zevran is all the more difficult now._

_~KA_

Kallian put her quill down and blew on the page to dry the ink. Closing her journal and binding it, she tucked it into her pack and hung her pack over her shoulder. Whistling to Lucius, who immediately came to her side, she stepped out of the room and locked the door behind her. Turning, she walked right into Anders who had clearly been about to knock on her door.

"Whoa, are you all right? Surely you saw me," he laughed, grabbing her shoulders to steady her.

"I'm sorry, Anders. Little distracted. Is everyone ready to go?" She tried to step around him, but he held her in place. "What?"

"Are you all right?"

Kallian's brow crinkled with annoyance. "I'm fine. Let's just get on with our errands. The sooner we finish up, the sooner we can return to Vigil's Keep."

He nodded, dropping his arms to his sides, and replied in a cheery voice. "Okay."

"Um…listen, Anders, I owe you my thanks, truly. Thank you for everything you did yesterday. I don't know what I would have done, if…" She left that thought unspoken. "I'm sorry if I seem short and grumpy."

His eyes glittered with mischief as he looked down into her eyes. "You're a pregnant elf. You _are_ short and grumpy."

She laughed and shook her head, giving the mage's arm a light punch. "You're walking a fine line, Anders."

xXx

Kallian and Leliana walked behind the rest of the group, arms linked, heads close together as they talked.

"So? Tell me," Kallian said, nudging Leliana's shoulder.

The bard nodded. "When we were in Denerim, before the siege, I met a man named Slim Couldry in the market. He was looking for someone who might be interested in helping him…_play_ with some of the nobles." She winked at Kallian, who caught her meaning immediately.

Keeping her voice low, Kallian asked "So you got back into the game?"

Leliana shrugged noncommittally. "There were a few burglaries, a few marks. Afterwards, I redistributed the profits to the city's less fortunate."

They stopped at a small stall and Kallian purchased hot savory buns, which they ate as they continued.

"While no one knows it is me, I am called the Dark Wolf."

"But that doesn't explain why you're _here_." Kallian pointed out as she popped a piece of bread-wrapped sausage into her mouth.

Leliana stopped and turned to face Kallian, her eyes surreptitiously taking in everything and everyone around her as she moved. "I heard a rumor not too long ago that there are people here who were loyal to Howe who would have you removed from your duty." She thought it best to get to the point.

Kallian stopped chewing, her mouth full. "What?"

She shook her head, realizing she had expected _something_, so this simply confirmed it, but it was upsetting nonetheless. Fear of being killed wasn't her first concern; it was anger that rolled through her. _I'm doing my duty as a Grey Warden, carrying out my king's command, and unknown persons who know very little about me are out to kill me._ _All because of that traitorous rat, Rendon Howe_, she thought. Shaking her head again, she finished chewing her mouthful of food and swallowed, a scowl forming on her face.

Leliana tipped her head toward their companions who had noticed the two women were trailing behind and stopped to wait for them. Kallian took her arm again and they continued walking.

"Great. This is just _great_. Do you know who?" Kallian mumbled as she kicked a rock along the ground.

"Not yet. Come," Leliana tugged on her arm. "I am here to help you with this, do not fret so."

Kallian sighed and drank from her water skin, surveying the market and her men. "Let's get some equipment. Nothing like a bit of shopping to cheer a girl up."

Within the hour she had equipped Anders, Nathaniel and Oghren with new armor and weapons, packs and clothing, even smalls and socks. At Anders' insistence she also purchased a bow and arrows for herself so she could transition to ranged attacks as her pregnancy progressed. After speaking with Mervis, Kallian was about to suggest that they go to the Crown and Lion to eat when she walked into Nathaniel, who had stopped dead in his tracks in front of a grocer's stand.

She stepped around to Nate's side as he mumbled an apology, his gaze fixed on the dark-haired woman who was rearranging produce, her back to him.

"Delilah? Is that really you?" he asked.

She straightened up and turned around, her mouth gaping open with surprise when she saw who had spoken. "Nathaniel! I had feared the worst."

Running to him, she threw her arms around him, tears flowing down her face. To Kallian's surprise, Nathaniel softened considerably and embraced his sister, lifting her off the ground. He finally put Delilah back down and introduced her to Kallian and the others. There was none of the awkwardness one might have expected in such circumstances; rather, Delilah was warm and gracious and Kallian took an immediate liking to the woman.

Holding her out at arm's length, Nathaniel gave his sister a hard look. "Times must have been hard, Delilah, but you can do better than this. Come back to the estate with me until we find somewhere else."

"What?" She put her hands on his arms, laughing gently. "Oh Nathaniel, I didn't marry Albert out of desperation, I adore him. I was so glad to get away from father's evil. This life is so much better."

He frowned. "Father's evil? Isn't that overstating things a bit? He got caught up in politics…"

Delilah's eyes drifted to Kallian. "You weren't there. You didn't see what he did, Nathaniel." She shook her head. "You want the culprit who destroyed our family? It was him, without question."

"I…I had no idea," Nate shifted uncomfortably.

Delilah smiled sadly. "Of course you did, but you always worshiped father, right from the time you were a little boy. Come, brother, let us sit and catch up a bit, shall we?"

He turned to find Kallian still by his side, nodding. "Go, Nate. Take Rosa and stay as long as you like. You can catch up with us at the Crown and Lion or our guest house, okay?"

"Yes, Commander. Thank you." He held out his arm to Delilah who stepped forward to loop her arm through his. Bowing her head to Kallian, Delilah led her brother to a nearby bench to sit.

Kallian watched them for a moment before turning to the rest of her companions. "Let's have a meal and a pint at the Crown and Lion."

xXx

The group had settled at a table in an alcove at the back of the Crown and Lion and was soon joined by Aiden, Marcus and Thomas. The three soldiers looked as though they had done far more than visit the weaponsmith's, which caused Kallian to raise an eyebrow. She flagged down the bar maid, Sorcha, and ordered a round of ale and the farmer's platter for everyone. Once Sorcha had left, Kallian raised her hand to silence the group.

"What in the Maker's name have you three been up to?" she hissed across the table.

Ser Marcus sheepishly scrubbed a smudge of blood from a new dent in his breast plate and proceeded to describe how they had run into a suspicious looking man who attacked them near the weaponsmith's shop. This had led to a chase around the city and several encounters with thugs and finally to a conversation with Constable Aidan after their original attacker disappeared into an abandoned house. Marcus paused his narration when Sorcha and the bartender returned to deliver their drinks and platters of food. As they all dug in, the three soldiers grinned at each other conspiratorially.

"We think we may have stumbled upon something, Commander. The constable wants us to look into the shifty looking bloke loitering about the abandoned house in the western quarter. As we passed, we thought we could see what might be a trap door through the window. There were two others with him at the time, but it is something worth investigating further, yeah?"

Kallian nodded, slipping a gold coin across the table. "Thank you, gentlemen. Why don't you stock up on poultices, injury kits, get your blades sharpened again, that sort of thing, and take care of that? Let Constable Aidan know what comes of it and report back to me at the Crow and Gate tonight." The men nodded and turned their attention back to the ample portions of bread, meat, cheese and pickles before them.

"Tomorrow we'll all head back to the keep to prepare to head out to the Wending Woods to look into Mervis' claims that merchants' caravans are being attacked along the Pilgrim's Path. Ach, we'll have to delay that a few days. I'll have to get…" Kallian paused to remember their names. "Myriani, Phillip, Aaron, Myles and their families settled in, and there's the Satinalia party on the first. We'll have to look into the cavern in Knotwood Hills, too. Hmm." She bit her lip for a moment, wondering which the bigger priority was. "Our last order of business today is to look into Kristoff's activities, see if he was staying here."

"Did you say Kristoff?" Sorcha had returned with jugs of water for the table.

"I did. I need to find him. Do you know him?"

Sorcha nodded. "Yes, he has a room upstairs. He's paid for another couple of weeks, but I haven't seen him for three or four days now. He said he was going south, to the Blackmarsh." She put the water down and excused herself from their company.

"With a name like the Blackmarsh, I don't imagine it's a very pleasant place," Anders mumbled through a mouthful of sausage.

Ser Marcus shook his head. "It isn't, from all I've heard. Stories, mostly. It is to the east of Vigil's Keep, if I recall correctly. More than a day's travel, two or three perhaps."

"Maker's balls," Kallian mumbled to herself, dropping her food onto her plate. "I'll have to ask the inn keeper to let us into Kristoff's room so we can see if he's left anything that'll give us an idea what he's looking for, where he's been. _Shit_."

Leliana spoke up, reaching out to put her hand on Kallian's. "What is it?"

"Why haven't I felt his presence, or he mine? If I could feel what was happening at the keep from the north of Amaranthine, couldn't he have felt it wherever he was? These men were his _brothers_. Why hasn't he returned to the keep? Did we pass each other on the road here?"

Oghren shook his head. "She said she hadn't seen him in three or four days. Seems unlikely, but it coulda been close." He paused, watching Kallian's face. After months of travel with the young elf, he knew when she was beating herself up. It started with the lip chewing, which she was now doing in earnest. "Come on, kid, ya can't be everything to everybody all the time, no matter what they call ya. Ya've been surrounded by soddin' darkspawn for days now."

Kallian shook her head. "I know, I know, but it doesn't make sense. Dammit."

"Are you going to finish that?" Anders asked, reaching across the table. Kallian had a knife hovering above her plate before he'd gotten half way. "All right, don't touch your food. I get it."

She ripped back into a chunk of bread and continued eating. Silence fell upon the table as they finished their meals. Sorcha poured more ale, bringing a mug of mint tea for Kallian, and eventually the conversation picked up again as she planned their departure in the morning.

"We'll pack up tonight and try to be on the road by dawn. Could someone let the families we're taking with us know that we'll collect them along the way? I'd rather they were awake and ready to go so we can keep moving."

Ser Marcus nodded, raising a hand. "We can do that while we're out. Myriani...Phillip...Aaron and Myles, you said? I think I remember where they were all camped."

"Thank you." Kallian stood, motioned to Lucius and turned to the three soldiers. "So you'll look into the situation as we discussed, while the rest of us see if we can figure out what Kristoff is up to. Leliana, what are you about?"

"Mon amie, I offer you my assistance while you are here, of course. I shall return to my duties in the morning."

Satisfied that there was nothing more to discuss, Kallian nodded. "Okay, let's go."

xXx

The inn keeper pinned her with a cold glare. "And who might you be, elf, to be askin' about him?"

Kallian put her arm on the bar and leaned forward. "I am his commanding officer, Warden Commander Arainai of Vigil's Keep, or Arlessa of Amaranthine if you prefer." _Might as well use the title if I have it_, she thought with a smirk as she watched the man's face.

"Jus' say the word, Commander, and I'll rip him a new one," Oghren growled.

The inn keeper had produced a key and was pushing it across the bar toward Kallian. "I don't think that will be necessary, but thank you, Oghren."

Taking the key, she led her companions to Kristoff's room and asked them to wait in the hall. Letting herself into the room, she looked around. It was neat and tidy and had obviously been prepared for Kristoff's potential return. The bed was made, the sheets had been turned down, and a fire burned in the fireplace across the room. Starting at her right, with the bath, Kallian walked around the room. There was a dagger and a small box of mementos in a trunk next to the bath, beyond that a couch and low table faced the fireplace. Picking up a leather-bound book that lay on the table, she continued to walk along the far wall, pausing in front of a map that was pinned up there. Numerous locations had been crossed off, save for an area to the east of Vigil's Keep. "Blackmarsh" had been circled. Along the wall to her left sat the bed, two side tables and another trunk. The trunk contained a long sword and a pair of heavy chainmail gloves made of white steel, an enchanted amulet and a letter. She took the letter and sat on the bed, waving her companions into the room. She read the letter out loud.

_Dearest Kristoff,_

_My sister and her babe are well. I shall leave Jader as soon as they're settled. Expect me at Vigil's Keep within the month. Ferelden is cold and wet, so make sure your socks are dry before you put them on. I know how it is with men. You can slay a thousand darkspawn, but when it comes to clean clothes and dry socks, you're hopeless! I can't wait to see you. _

_Love, Aura._

Kallian smiled, remembering Alistair and his damn socks during the blight. They were always damp and dirty, needing to be mended. The smile fell from her lips as she realized that if Kristoff was dead, she would have to deal with his wife. The letter wasn't dated, making it impossible to guess when Aura might be expected to arrive at Vigil's Keep. Leliana took the letter, folded it up and put it back in the trunk, while Kallian flipped through the leather-bound book.

"It looks like his journal," she mumbled. "I wonder why he left it behind?"

Flipping to the last written page, she read the entry to her companions.

_Few in town have heard anything about darkspawn stragglers. I doubted reports myself until a man told me he encountered darkspawn in the Blackmarsh. Although locals say the marsh is haunted, brave and desperate souls like this man still risk collecting peat._

_The man said their leader spoke, but all know darkspawn cannot talk. More horrifying, he described a monster, a worm with legs. Surely he was mistaken about it following the darkspawn._

_I shall leave for the Blackmarsh in the morning._

Kallian stood and walked back to the table, putting the journal down where she'd found it. Looking around the room, she straightened the bed sheets where she'd sat down. When everything was as it had been, she pulled her own journal out of her pack, along with a small vial of ink and a quill. She wrote a quick note – _Please return to Vigil's Keep at your earliest convenience. Warden Commander Kallian Arainai_ – dated it and pinned it to the center of the map on the wall.

"He left here four days ago, so he must be in the Blackmarsh by now. I think we have to assume that Aura will arrive any time within the next few weeks, at most. Hopefully we can find Kristoff, alive and well, before I have to tell her I've got no idea where he is or what's become of him, or…worse." She sighed and gave the room one last look. "Okay, let's go. There isn't much more we can do here."

As they descended the stairs, Kallian caught site of Nathaniel, who was just entering the tavern. She waved him over and stopped to speak to the inn keeper again. The man was far more pleasant and accommodating than he had been earlier. "I want Kristoff's room held and kept secure to the end of Firstfall. How much will that be?" She pulled her coin purse from her pack.

"Oh, for you, Arlessa, there is no fee." He spoke loudly enough for those nearby to take interest.

For weeks there had been great speculation as to who would replace Rendon Howe and the announcement that the Hero of Ferelden was the king's choice had garnered mixed reactions. Some people were offended that she was an elf or a Grey Warden or the person who had killed Howe, or any combination of those factors. Others were pleased for the very same reasons. A common person, an elf no less, rising to the ranks of nobility, was inspiring and many citizens had been waiting for a chance to see their new arlessa.

Aware that they were attracting attention now more than ever, Kallian smiled and spoke clearly. "I thank you for your kind offer, ser, but I _insist_ on paying you for your services." She slid a gold coin across the bar. "I trust this will suffice?"

His eyes widened. "Oh yes, my lady, thank you. Please feel free to come back any time, day or night. It would be my pleasure to serve you."

Kallian bowed her head to the man and turned, walking out of the Crown and Lion with her companions trailing behind her, smiling and nodding to those who took notice as she passed.

"Well," she mumbled as they headed toward the Crow and Gate. "That was…strange."

Leliana looped her arm through her friend's. "No doubt he thinks so as well. You could have paid for a few months with that sovereign."

Kallian took a deep breath and blew it out. "Pfft. Can't hurt to spread some good will around and put money back into the city. His reaction…One minute I'm a dirty elf, the next minute he's offering me free room and board. It's just...weird."

"Oh, just wait five minutes," Anders interjected. "The rumor mill in this town is well oiled. By the time we get to the guest house, everyone will know exactly who you are."

"Super."

Nathaniel broke his silence, his tone bitter. "My father never paid for anything in this arling, ever. You have no such sense of entitlement. You will be a welcome change for many people, Commander."

Kallian met his gaze and sensed that something had shifted for Nate. Running into his sister had clearly done the man some good. "Thank you."

Kallian tipped her head up to face the mid-afternoon sky. Dark clouds were rolling overhead, threatening rain, and a cold wind stirred up dust and refuse along the street. Again, her thoughts drifted to Zevran and she longed to be with him. _This time tomorrow_, she promised herself as the first drops of rain began to fall.

* * *

A/N: Another delay in posting, but here I am at last. Things are going to start heating up for our Warden.

My thanks goes to Bioware for letting me mess around with their stuff. A shout out to Zevgirl and Zute (you're my next priority!), and a big thank you to everyone who has reviewed, alerted or "favorited" me and/or my stories. It's a real boost to the creative ego to know you're out there. I welcome comments, reviews, and constructive criticism, especially if I've missed an error/typo. Hearing from readers is great fun and it keeps me motivated! Cheers, Biff


	7. It's all Coming Together

_NSFW passage coming up..._

* * *

**It's all Coming Together**

28 Harvestmere, 9:30

Their departure in the morning was a bit chaotic and slowed by hangovers, but they managed to collect the families they were taking with them shortly after dawn. Marcus, Thomas and Aiden had successfully cleared the smugglers out of the city and their underground hiding spot, and had celebrated late into the night with Anders and Oghren. The dwarf was no worse for wear in the morning, accustomed as he was to drink, but if Kallian could have prevented Anders from healing himself and the soldiers, she would have, to teach them all a lesson.

Leliana accompanied the group as far as the city walls, where she embraced Kallian and kissed her cheeks. "Take care of yourself and your wee babe, mon amie, and give my regards to Zev."

"I wish you could come with us, Leli, stay for a while. You will try to visit before you head west, won't you?"

"Of course. I hope to have some news for you soon," she said with a wink. After another hug and a quick kiss, Leliana slipped into the shadows and was gone.

When they were finally out on the road heading south to the keep, Kallian rode up and down the line of wagons and people she had with her, trying to get to know a bit about each of them. Myriani's daughter had just turned two; her husband had died in a farming accident the previous year. Phillip's wife's name was Ana and their son Colin was five years old. Aaron had only just married his wife Aoife, but they thought she might be with child already. Myles and his wife Brianag had a daughter named Seàrlaid, who was four. The three wives could all sew and embroider, which Kallian thought might come in handy. She wrote everything she'd learned about them in her journal when they stopped for a break at noon, worried she'd never remember it all otherwise.

As the sun dipped toward the horizon in the late afternoon, the keep loomed ever larger on the horizon and Kallian's thoughts returned to Zevran. Warmth spread through her body and her pulse quickened.

xXx

Zevran and Mhairi had used their time wisely, inviting Garevel to help them plan out training regimens for the keep's guard and the Grey Wardens alike. The routines included calisthenics, a series of movements and poses designed to strengthen and tone the body, running, sparring and more focused training on specific skills. Everyone was to engage in some form of training or exercise every morning, and Zevran enjoyed sparring with the soldiers.

Household members had continued to put the keep and its grounds to rights, the wooden defenses surrounding the baileys had been repaired, and Voldrik's growing team of dwarven stone masons had begun the task of pulling debris up out of the keep's basements to salvage what they could and remove what they could not. Lillith had given Mistress Woolsey a list of merchants who travelled the northern and coastal routes and might be convinced to come to the keep, Varel had begun receiving messages from the nobles who had been summoned to swear fealty to the new Arlessa, and plans for the Satinalia celebration were as well in hand as could be expected, given the circumstances. All in all, life at the keep was getting back to normal quickly.

xXx

Varel stood in the guardhouse, a spyglass extended before his eye. Just as Sergeant Marverlies had said, the Warden Commander's group had more than doubled.

"Well, Marverlies, it looks as though we have company coming. Please have someone advise the kitchen staff and let our lord know that the commander has returned."

"Yes, Seneschal." The warrior hurried away to do as she was asked, while Varel turned his attention back to the group of wagons and riders approaching the gate.

As they neared the main gates, Kallian became anxious. Anders had suggested that they seek out Petra and Zevran immediately to talk about what had happened in Amaranthine and let Petra examine her. Kallian had found herself wishing they could just let it go, but even now, as she took another drink from her water skin, she felt shame for thinking such a thing. Zevran wanted to share her burdens, and would likely be more disappointed if she kept this to herself than he would be about what had actually happened. The sound of the gates opening pulled her back to the moment. Varel was at her side, offering to help her down from her horse.

"Welcome back, Commander."

She removed her helm and gloves. "Thank you, Varel, it is good to see you again. We have much to discuss, but we are hungry and weary and I…" She spotted Zevran entering the bailey with Petra, Elspeth, and Mistress Woolsey following in his wake, and promptly lost track of her thoughts. "I would appreciate it if we could speak first thing in the morning. I have invited these people to join us here at the keep in exchange for goods and services, as we've discussed. No doubt you have news as well."

Varel smiled. "Of course, Commander."

Zevran took Kallian's helm and gloves and handed them to Elspeth. "Bella, welcome home."

"Mio marito," she breathed as he took her face in his hands and kissed her. She trembled at his touch, sexual arousal mixing with nerves.

Ever perceptive, Zevran could sense something was amiss and raised an eyebrow at her. Before she could say anything, Anders was at her side.

"Petra, Zev, we need to have a chat."

"_Dammit_, Anders," Kallian protested, resisting the urge to punch him. "Could you not give me five bloody minutes? I have people to take care of here."

Anders turned and waved to Nathaniel. "Nate, would you mind playing host for our commander, get these people inside and taken care of?"

Kallian made an exasperated sound and Howe's eyes narrowed. "Commander?"

Kallian rolled her eyes, but nodded. "Please, Nate, if you could. You'll know best where to put them for now, until we can see which houses are suitable for them. I need to…"

Nathaniel shook his head, putting up a hand to stop her. "I understand, Commander. There is no need to explain." With that, he turned on his heels and beckoned to Mistress Woolsey to follow him toward the wagons.

Zevran cleared his throat. His features were smooth and relaxed, but concern clouded his eyes and his grip around Kallian's waist tightened.

"We are fine…but…I…ah, let's go to our chambers."

Looping her arm around his, she shot Anders a withering glare as they turned toward the keep's entrance. The mage simply chuckled and pulled Ser Pounce from a pocket within his robes, scratching the cat under the chin.

xXx

Kallian tied the belt of her dressing gown and bid Petra a good night as Zevran escorted the mage out of their chambers. She moved to stand by the fire, a large platter of food nearby of little interest to her in spite of her hunger. Kallian had been drinking water religiously since 'the incident', as she called it, and Petra assured them their child was out of danger. However, she did agree that Anders was correct to suggest a few days of rest before departing again, with more regular visits to Petra. Kallian had bristled at that, but couldn't deny she had essentially put the spirit healer in charge of the health of the Grey Wardens by declaring him their senior mage. She could hear him talking to Petra and Zevran out in the hallway, their voices low enough that she couldn't make out what they were saying. On any other day, under other circumstances, she would be annoyed to be excluded from such a conversation, but she was too weary and concerned for their child to protest. The flames spluttered as the door opened and closed again.

Warm arms wrapped around her and Zevran murmured in her ear. "Speak to me, tesora."

"I'm so sorry, Zev." It was the first thing that came to her mind.

Zevran frowned and moved to stand in front of her. "Why do you say this?"

"I almost lost our child, Zev, _your son_. I should have been more careful. I will be, I promise." She blinked back tears.

He tipped his head to one side, not able to agree or disagree with her. "Come." He led her into their bed chamber, and took her to the full-length mirror that stood by the armoire. Standing at her back, his arms around her waist, he looked her reflection in the eyes. She knew he loved her, but did she know how deeply? He set aside his usual reserve and spoke from his heart.

"Here is the woman who gave me an opportunity to start a new life, to choose for myself what I would do and where I would go. This woman encouraged me to think of the possibilities before me if I were free of the Crows, and she helped bring that about." He gave her a quick hug and kiss on the cheek.

"Because of her friendship and her faith in me, I have allowed myself to love and be loved. I have dared to hope that I could have the things I thought I could not, a wife, a child, a home, a future. Do not misunderstand me, I…_want_ this child," he pressed his hand to her belly. "But it started with _you_, Kallian. If we lose this child, we may hope for another, but I cannot say the same about you. I could not bear to lose you, mia moglie, and I pray you will remember that."

She could hear the emotion in his voice, see it in his face, and she was overwhelmed by his declaration. Kallian's knees went weak and she thought they might fail her, but she found the strength to turn and face him. "Oh, Zevran," she gasped, embracing him. "I swear to you I will never forget it."

"Glad I am to hear it," he replied, his voice deep and husky with desire.

Nothing else mattered as his hands swept her hair aside and his lips descended upon her neck. Shivers of pleasure ran down her spine and any lingering memories of Petra's hands examining her body quickly vanished. She wriggled against him, pressed her breasts to his chest, silently begging for more, but Zevran pulled away from her a moment later.

"No, no, minx. You must have some dinner first."

Evidence of his arousal was plain to see and Kallian whimpered, pressing her body to his, but he insisted and pulled her back to the table where their dinner sat waiting.

"You are a cruel man, marito," she sighed as she sat and pulled a napkin into her lap.

Zevran smiled, a glint in his eye. "You think so, do you? Petra and Anders have been quite clear. You are to eat regularly and get plenty of rest."

Kallian simply pouted in response, drawing a laugh from Zevran. "Are you not happy to know they also prescribed exercise, listing sex as one of the many acceptable ways to accomplish that goal?"

He pulled his chair next to hers and began setting out a meal for her: a goblet of ale, a bowl of beef broth with barley, a portion of roasted boar and root vegetables, a chunk of bread with cheese, and bread pudding for dessert. Once he had his own meal assembled, he began to feed Kallian. She began to protest, but as he slipped a slice of boar into her mouth, he let his finger linger along her bottom lip and she thought better of it. He spooned broth into her mouth, licking away anything that dripped onto her chin, and she trembled with desire. Juices from the roasted vegetables dampened her lips and he leaned forward to kiss them. She fed him as well, and reveled in how utterly erotic it was to have him suck her fingertips clean, wondering when something as ordinary as eating bread and cheese had become sexy.

Watching his mouth as he ate, imagining his lips on her body, made her flush pink with desire. Kallian's smalls grew damp and she felt as though she were inching closer to an orgasm with every bite they ate. She marveled at Zevran's self control. Although he was clearly as aroused as she was, his patience and ability to ignore his emotions when he wished was enviable. When they finally dug into the bread pudding, with its sweet custard sauce, she dropped the spoon down the front of his tunic as she fed him.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Zev," she pouted as she reached forward to collect the spoon and dip it into the pudding.

"You are not, you did that on purpose," he countered with a grin, slowly removing his tunic and tossing it aside.

"I don't know what you're talking about." The spoon somehow managed to fall again, leaving a trail of custard sauce and bread pudding on Zevran's chest and abdomen before it landed in his lap. "Oh, how clumsy of me."

"Hmm. Are you going to do something about that?"

Kallian took the spoon and slowly licked it clean. Tossing it aside, she used her finger to wipe some of the custard from Zevran's chest, sucking her fingertip and licking her lips as he watched. Kneeling before Zevran, Kallian began to lick the custard from his body, flicking her tongue back and forth as she went.

"You'll have to take these off," she whispered, her voice breathy with lust. She tugged on the laces of his trousers and he lifted his hips off his chair, allowing her to undress him.

Kallian's lip twitched at the sight of his naked body and she reached out to wrap her hand around his length, pressing it to her mouth as she licked the underside of it. She took him into her mouth and groaned, happiness filling her as she enjoyed the taste of her husband's flesh. Zevran ran his fingers into her hair, moaning as her ministrations brought him closer and closer to his climax until he finally let go. With a shout, the tension that had been building in his groin was released and he stiffened and bucked against her one last time, shuddering with pleasure. Loosening his grip on her head, he relaxed into his chair and looked at her. She was radiant, seductively licking the last of him from her lips.

"Zevran, do you remember what you said to me in Redcliffe? Months ago, when we were headed to Denerim to call the Landsmeet?"

He smiled. "I assume you are referring to something…sexual?"

"Mmm mmm." She stood and held out her hand, taking his and leading him back to the mirror in the other room.

Zevran smiled, standing behind her as they faced the mirror. "Ah, I do recall saying something about a mirror…"

He slipped his hands around to the front of her dressing gown and undid the belt, opening the garment to reveal her naked body. He pulled the dressing gown from between them and tossed it over a nearby chair.

"Look at how beautiful you are, tesora," he murmured into her ear.

Zevran brought one hand up to the slight bulge in her belly that was their son while his other cupped her breast and teased her nipple. Kallian leaned back against him and groaned, the feel of his hands on her skin lighting a fire within her. His hands slowly dropped to her thighs and she watched in the mirror as he cupped her pelvis in his hand and slipped his fingers into her warm, damp folds, teasing the bud of flesh and nerves there. As his hand toyed with her, he kissed her shoulder, gently nipping at her tender flesh. Keeping her eyes on the mirror, Kallian moved her hands behind her back, gripping Zevran's manhood. She moved her hand up and down his length, sliding her thumb over the tip of it, and smiled as she made him gasp with pleasure. Twining his fingers in her hair, he pulled it aside and planted kisses on her neck, pausing here and there to leave a mark. Finally unable to resist her any longer, he turned her around and lifted her by her thighs so she could wrap her legs around his waist. He kissed her then, his tongue laying claim to her mouth, while his hands sought to guide himself into her body.

Kallian gasped as he filled her and threw her arms over his shoulders for support as she moved up and down. She watched in the mirror as the sweat on their bodies glistened in the candlelight, fascinated by their reflection. Zevran's legs and buttocks flexed as he bore her weight and rocked up to bury himself in her body and the sight of him took her breath away. His eyes found hers in the mirror as she watched his arms and chest muscles work to support her, his tattoos seeming to ripple as light and shadow distorted their reflection.

"Do you like what you see?"

"Y-yes, yes," she panted in response.

He gently bit the tender flesh just above her collar bone. "You are delicious, mia amora…cosi bella," he murmured, his breath sending shivers of delight throughout her body.

She ground down against him, groaning, and he lifted her back up and plunged into her, and they continued to dance until Kallian could feel her climax coming upon her, a warm and wonderful tingling sensation spreading out in waves from her core. She cried out as her pleasure overwhelmed her. With a shout, he stiffened and held her close to his chest, whispering "ti amo, cara moglie, ti amo".

"Mmmaker, Zev," she breathed, taking one last look at their reflection as he turned toward their bathing room, "that was in-incredible. _You_ are incredible. I love you, ti amo."

They cleaned themselves off and stumbled into bed, falling into a deep and contented sleep in one another's arms.

xXx

29 Harvestmere, 9:30

The keep was a bustle of activity the following morning when Zevran led Kallian to the great hall. The room had been cleaned, broken furniture had been repaired or replaced, and it was full of life. Seàrlaid and Colin were chasing each other around and under the tables, and occasionally darted after Lucius who seemed quite happy to entertain the young ones. Varel, Garevel, Woolsey and the Wardens all sat at the long high table, placed on a platform at one end of the room; the soldiers, merchants, staff and the new arrivals sat around a large U-shape of tables arranged below it. Zevran led Kallian to the high table, stopping along the way as people greeted them.

Sitting down, Kallian surveyed the room. "All of you have done an amazing job cleaning up around here," she said to Varel. "I can't thank you enough for your efforts."

Varel bowed his head slightly. "Thank you, Commander…"

"Varel, please…"

"_Kallian_. We have felt particularly motivated the past few days to make as much progress as possible. We must discuss the business of the arling, but perhaps Mistress Woolsey can update you on matters pertaining to the treasury."

Elspeth and Alison arrived and began serving Zevran and Kallian their morning meal while the discussion continued.

Woolsey nodded, looking happier than usual. "We are already seeing an increase in business through Yuriah's efforts, and if Mistress Lillith's network of merchants can be convinced to come to the keep we will be well on our way to recovering from recent setbacks and building up the treasury. I understand you spoke to Mervis?"

Kallian nodded. "Yes. Trouble along Pilgrim's Path, in the Wending Woods, he thinks. Caravans have been attacked, merchants have gone missing. If we can deal with that and get things moving again, business should be even better, yes?"

Woolsey smiled. "Indeed. May I suggest something?"

"Please. Speak freely, all of you," Kallian said, looking up and down the table.

"There is a suite of guest rooms in the keep, which is where Nathaniel has placed our current guests. Perhaps in time we could rent those rooms to merchants and other travelers passing through."

"That's a good idea. Myles is a carpenter. I want him to start work on repairing the homes he and the others want to live in. Once we move them all out of the keep, let's do it." She paused for a moment, looking down at the lower tables. "So…how do we feed everyone? I never really gave that much thought until now."

"We are well stocked with a small variety of grains and wheat, the Hafter River offers a bounty of fish, and from what I understand, Rendon Howe did not allow the locals to hunt or forage in the surrounding forest or up the mountain behind us, so a wide variety of wildlife, herbs, edible and medicinal plants, and mushrooms is available. The wheat fields were harvested in August and records indicate they were sown with seed by mid-Kingsway, so another harvest will be ready next August. I would imagine that if you are able to successfully recruit some farmers to take over the fallow fields to the south of the curtain wall, we will be fairly self-sufficient within another two years."

"There was a conservatory along the south side of the keep where we used to grow plants year round," Nathaniel offered, a slightly guilty look crossing his face. "It is how I gained entry to the keep," he offered when Kallian raised a questioning eyebrow at him.

Woolsey shrugged. "It is still there. Some of the window panes are broken and the place is overrun with weeds, but with time and effort we could certainly restore it. Perhaps Myriani and the other women could work on that project over the winter."

"I think it would be wise if both you and Zevran were to familiarize yourselves with the day-to-day operations of the estate and arling," Varel suggested as they finished their meals. "There are some immediate concerns to deal with. You must hold court within the week. While you were gone, we made a few arrests. There is also the Satinalia feast and bonfire in two days' time and the nobility will be here two days following that. Then perhaps as your schedule permits we can arrange to spend some time together going over the affairs of the estate, matters pertaining to the treasury, and so on."

Kallian was starting to feel a little overwhelmed. "Wow, okay. Um, let's hold court tomorrow. I'm on healer's orders to rest and we can't travel to the Blackmarsh and back in between any of these events, anyway, so I would like to make good use of my time over the next week. I suppose we need to get a message out to First Warden Ronan, too."

"Yes, as you wish. If you will excuse me, I have things I must attend to."

"Thank you, Varel."

Kallian searched the great hall for Marcus, Aiden and Thomas. When she spotted them, she whistled and waved them over. "Tell us, what were your impressions of Constable Aidan?"

Marcus looked at the others and shrugged. "He's a bit of a git, really." Garevel chuckled, nodding in agreement.

"The three of us cleared out the smuggler's hideout and salvaged trade goods, and that was _after_ that bloke attacked us and led us around town for nearly an hour, fighting with thugs. The Constable's got twice as many men as our group had," he waved at everyone who had been in Amaranthine "stationed all over the city, so it stands to reason he should have been able to take care of the problem himself. So why didn't he?"

Kallian thought back to Sergeant Kylon of Denerim, complaining about the useless 'spares and bastards' he'd been forced to recruit and how she and her companions had helped him deal with numerous problems. "Incompetence or corruption, I'd say. What other explanation could there be? Thank you, gentlemen. When will you and Ser Stephan return to Denerim? I assume you be joining King Alistair's personal guard."

Aiden cleared his throat. "His Majesty did make the offer, Commander, but with Vigil's Keep and the Grey Wardens recruiting, I, for one, am considering my options."

She was surprised. An appointment in the King's Guard was a prestigious and important one to hold. "I am honored, thank you. Please enjoy our hospitality while you decide what you wish to do."

The men took their leave and she pondered everything she had heard. Finally pushing herself away from the table, she stood and addressed everyone sitting around her. "I'd like you all to meet me in the throne room in an hour. We have some things to discuss.

xXx

Anders looked up from his perch in front of a bookshelf along the perimeter of the throne room to see Kallian striding toward him, a journal in her hand. When Ser Pounce spotted Lucius padding along behind her, the cat leapt from the mage's shoulder to trot to the mabari's side where he promptly began to purr and wind himself around the hound's legs. Kallian watched the two animals for a moment, laughing.

"I suppose as long as Lucius doesn't step on Pounce, they'll get along just fine." She turned to face Anders. "Look, after what happened in Amaranthine, I thought you might be interested in reading this." She held the book out to him and he took it, flipping through the first few pages.

"'The Ways of the Arcane Warrior'?"

"It's a long story, but I came upon this knowledge in some ancient ruins in the Brecilian Forest. Took me four days to write it all down, but there it is. As a mage, you could learn to wield both your magic and weapons. You're stronger than most Circle mages I've met, so I don't imagine it would be too much work for you to become accustomed to armor and a sword and shield. You could cast spells without a staff, and keep fighting even if you've been hit with a holy smite."

"Oh, well…thank you. I've never thought of wearing armor."

"I hear the ladies find it rather sexy," she offered with a smirk as she walked away.

xXx

"Sooo…here's the thing," Kallian said as she sat on the stairs up to the throne.

She looked around at Varel, Woolsey, Garevel, Zevran and the wardens who were gathered around her. "I have it on good authority that there is a conspiracy afoot to get rid of me." She had already told Zevran everything that had happened in the city of Amaranthine, but he still bristled at the thought.

"I can think of a few nobles who would have been quite put out by my father's downfall," Nathaniel mumbled.

"Indeed," Varel agreed. "How did you come into this information?"

She waved her hand dismissively. "One of my companions during the Blight happened to overhear a conversation in Denerim and is investigating. When we have the nobles here, I want all of you to mingle with them and see what you can pick up."

She caught Nathaniel looking quite uncomfortable with the suggestion and raised a hand. "Nate, all that has happened is in the past. You are a Grey Warden now. As a matter of fact, I think you should be my second in command."

He clearly looked shocked and was about to protest, but she cut him off. "It makes sense. You know the area and its history, the people, and in spite of being your father's _spare_, as you put it, you were raised a noble. You'll be able to help guide me in my dealing with them and handle affairs in my absence. This arling is a bit different in that it is Alistair's intention that it be handed down from Warden Commander to Warden Commander, and I think it stands to reason that a non-warden should not be in charge around here."

With a quick glance to Zevran, who nodded, she added "Besides, Zev isn't interested in the administration of the arling. He wishes to train recruits and oversee various operations around the keep."

"I…ah…thank you, Commander. Your faith in me is…appreciated." He donned his usual scowl as he drifted off in thought.

"Let's talk about this in greater detail later, all right?" Getting a distracted nod from him, she stood. "Well, that's all I had to say. I want to check in with the latest additions to our community, and I believe you have training sessions to attend to."

They parted ways and Kallian and Zevran began walking toward the guest rooms. Anders paused before running after Kallian.

"Commander. Kallian."

"What is it, Anders?"

He tapped the book he held in his hand. "I wanted to thank you again for this, and…um…to say that I will help you with those…books you wanted translated."

A sense of relief washed over her, and tension she hadn't even realized she was feeling eased. "Are you certain you feel comfortable doing that?"

"Well, not entirely, but I trust you."

"Thank you, Anders. I understand that this has been a difficult decision for you to make, and I want you to know that I really appreciate you agreeing to do this."

She watched him as he wandered down the hallway and disappeared around the corner before she took Zevran's arm in hers and continued walking. "I think it's all coming together, finally."

She squeezed his arm as he leaned down to kiss her and smiled as the sounds of children laughing drifted down the hall.

* * *

_**A/N: **My gratitude as always to Bioware for their universe and dialogue and to the readers who have added me and/or my stories to an alerts or favorites list, especially to those who have reviewed me. Hearing from you is great! Oy, a shout out to my girls, Zevgirl and Zute!_

_According to my sources (Gaelic and Scottish names site):_  
_Aoife is pronounced 'EE fa' and means beautiful/radiant_  
_Brianag is pronounced 'BREE uh nak' and means strength_  
_Seàrlaid is pronounced SHAWR lutch, a precursor to Charlotte, and may mean 'instigator'_


	8. A Day in Court

_My thanks to Bioware for the universe in which we play, to everyone who reads and reviews, to my ladies Zute and Zevgirl, and finally, to my recently acquired beta, Mille Libri, whose gentle poking got me to be more creative and to think through a few things a bit more logically. I did not, however, get her to read this again after my revisions…I hope I've done her justice!_

* * *

**A Day in Court**

30 Harvestmere, 9:30

Kallian awoke filled with more energy than she'd had for weeks and, finding that Zevran was awake and in his usual morning state, promptly took advantage of her husband. As they lay together afterward, she found that the fears and guilt she'd felt over the past few days had faded away, new concerns filling their place. She confessed to feeling slightly ill at the thought of presiding over matters of justice.

"I have never seen legal proceedings before, I don't know all our laws…I suppose that's why I have Varel and the others, but my ignorance makes me so dependent upon them. I feel vulnerable as a result." She lay with one leg draped over his, propped up on her elbow as she traced the lines of his tattoos with her other hand.

Zevran wound her hair around his fingers and smiled up at her. "You needn't feel that way for long. The keep has a fair sized library. There must be some books on the subject you can read."

"I will have to, you're right. I have much to learn and much to do, _and_ we need to prepare a nursery for our son, try to determine if we need a wet nurse and then find one. Maker, we need to do so many things. We aren't prepared for this."

He laughed and pulled her down into an embrace. "One step at a time, bella. We have several months. You must be hungry, yes? We shall eat first."

Her stomach growled in response and she laughed out loud. "To the dining hall, then."

xXx

"This isn't funny, Anders." Kallian looked down at her feet, which were hanging a few inches above the floor as she sat on the throne. She swung them back and forth. "I look like a child."

Anders and Oghren both laughed again and then beat a hasty retreat to the nearby keg, where the dwarf refilled his flask. Nathaniel snorted with displeasure and turned his attention back to Kallian.

"We could get you a footstool," Varel offered, a hint of amusement in his voice. He turned to Elspeth and tipped his head toward the door, and the maid hurried out of the room.

Kallian pursed her lips. "Hmm. That will do for now, I suppose, but honestly I would feel much better if we could find something…smaller. And more comfortable. This thing is hard as rock, but if I put a _cushion_ on the seat…pfft." She hopped off the oversized chair and began to pace back and forth.

"So, Varel, Garevel. Who have you arrested, what happens, what do I do?" She paused and laughed to herself. "Forgive me, I think it's safe to say I'm nervous."

Garevel looked at the parchments he held. "We have a shepherd named Alec, charged with stealing two bushels of grain from the crown, and a soldier from Vigil's Keep's own guard, one Danella, charged with desertion. The maximum penalty for both crimes is death."

"Oh." Kallian stopped walking and rubbed her forehead. "Oh…wow. What was their motivation?"

Garevel looked confused. "Excuse me?"

She rolled her eyes at Nathaniel. "Why did they do what they did?"

Elspeth returned with a footstool and, at a nod from Varel, placed it in front of the throne. Before leaving, she announced, "Dinner will be ready at mid-day as usual, my lady."

"Thank you!" Kallian called after the elf as she slipped back out of the room.

Garevel cleared his throat. "I don't know, my lady. If you like, I could ask the soldiers who found and arrested them?"

"But what exactly would _they_ know? No, I'll ask the prisoners myself. I think it's something worth knowing." She smoothed out her gown, turning to face the throne. Shaking her head, she sat on it and put her feet up on the stool. "All right, bring them in."

Several minutes later, the prisoners were brought up from the cells and Varel declared the court in session. He sat at a table to Kallian's left, keeping notes on the proceedings, while Nathaniel stood at attention to her right. Alec was brought forward first, the man's shackles practically falling off his wrists and ankles he was so thin. He hung his head low while the charges against him were read aloud and silence descended upon the room as Kallian considered the man before her.

"Alec, why did you steal this grain?" By the looks of him, it seemed obvious to her, but she wanted to hear him tell his story.

The man jumped, clearly not expecting to be spoken to at all, and turned his face up to hers. "I b-beg your pardon my lady, but my family is starving…" His voice faltered and he struggled to raise a hand to his face to wipe a tear from his eye. "I was desperate to feed my wife and child. We have some sheep, but the money their wool brings in could provide more meals than the sheep, and they need grain as well. I…I know what I did was wrong, my lady, but we have so little out here because of the Blight and I didn't know what else to do."

Kallian watched him for a moment, trying to assess his character. Nothing about him made her think he was a _bad_ man; he had simply been desperate and she had seen too much of that in her lifetime. _Who am I to judge this man? I am certain I have done worse, and perhaps not always with the best of intentions._ She sighed inwardly, not doubting others before her must have had the same struggles. _Try to be fair and just, and serve to set an example for others,_ she told herself, remembering a lesson her father had taught her.

"Thank you, Alec. That will be all." Kallian waved Varel, Nathaniel and Garevel to her side, speaking in low tones.

"Garevel, would you please get the man a chair or stool to sit on and take the shackles off his arms, at least. I hardly think he's going to attempt to escape with all of us gathered around him. He's clearly in poor health, and if I find out he wasn't given sufficient food and water while he was in our cells…" She pursed her lips to stop herself from saying more. "_Go_."

Leaning in closer to Varel and Nathaniel, she sought their counsel. "What are my options?"

Varel explained that she could have the man hanged or flogged, but that hanging was typical, and Nathaniel added that his father would have done both. Kallian's forehead creased with a frown. _Surely Alistair wouldn't kill a man for trying to feed his family and keep his sheep alive?_ She thought back on the times during the Blight when they had been forced to steal to survive. They had been able to hunt and forage for food, too, but there had been times when she'd put their survival above what she knew to be right. Knowing that Howe reserved the sole right to hunt and forage on his lands, Alec had few options. She resolved to throw out Howe's restrictions on the surrounding forestlands and turned her attention back to the man now seated in front of her. Sliding off the throne, she went down to stand before the shepherd.

"Alec." She waited for him to look up at her. "Stealing is wrong, you know this, and we cannot allow such an offence to go unpunished." If it were possible, the man's shoulders slumped even more and they began to shake as he silently cried.

Kallian reached out to put a hand on this shoulder. "However, I shall be lenient as you did not intend to harm anyone. Quite the opposite, really, and I cannot fault you for wanting to take care of your family. If I had known about your situation I would have done what I could to help. I realize I have been neglectful in truly investigating the state of the arling's people. I regret that and intend to remedy the situation as soon as possible.

"Here is what I propose to do with you, Alec. First, you are hereby conscripted into the army, where I trust you will serve the arling faithfully for as long as you are able. You will stay in the infirmary under the care of our healers until you are well enough to take up a post here within the keep and begin training. Our soldiers receive room and board and are paid a wage for their service. Your wage will be docked the cost of the two bushels of grain you stole, at a reasonable rate, so that you may repay the Crown for them."

The man was now openly weeping with gratitude and reached out to take Kallian's hand in his, pressing a kiss to her fingers. Garevel lurched forward as if to protect her, but Kallian stopped him with a quick wave of her free hand.

"Th-thank you, m-my lady, th-thank you," Alec sobbed.

Kallian held his hand firmly in hers. "I trust you will make much of this opportunity to redeem yourself, Alec. We will speak again, and I will see to your family's welfare. Anders? Sergeant Maverlies?" She looked up to see the two of them stepping forward.

"Anders, please take Alec to the infirmary, assess his condition and do what you can to hasten his recovery. Maverlies, I would be grateful if you could find Dorothy and instruct her to ensure this man has three meals a day and water to drink. He must regain his health. Have a guard stationed outside the infirmary as a precaution. Garevel, remove the man's shackles."

As Alec was led away, Kallian turned to Varel. "I want you to find his wife and child as soon as possible. Send Petra along with a few guards, perhaps one or two of the women here, and some rations, grain for their flock, however small or large it might be. I don't want this unhappy situation to be further compounded by their deaths, if there's anything I can do about it. We can bring them and their sheep here, find a place for them. Let the family bring with them whatever possessions they wish."

"Yes, my lady." Varel made a note in his journal.

Once Garevel returned, Danella was brought forward and the process was repeated. She insisted that she had asked for leave several times after receiving word that her parents' farm was in danger of being attacked by darkspawn, reported in the area. Finally, in desperation, she had left her post and fled to their farm to the northwest of the keep. When she arrived, the farm was under attack, and while her family had survived, their crops and home had been burned to the ground. Given a choice between execution and imprisonment, Kallian chose to sentence the woman to a year in prison, followed by a return to service.

"Where are your parents and brother now, Danella?" she asked as she approached the woman.

"Camped nearby, my lady. They had nowhere else to go and followed me back here when I was arrested."

As Danella brushed tears from her face, Kallian noticed dark bruises under the shackles around her wrists. A purple tinge along her jaw line spoke to a recent punch or backhand to the face. She shot a look at Garevel, disappointed to see that he averted his eyes almost immediately, and resolved to look into the matter further. She turned her mind back to Danella's family. They were homeless farmers; she had fallow fields that needed seeding and an overgrown conservatory that had to be reclaimed.

"Varel, please send someone to fetch Danella's family. I don't like the idea of them out there while darkspawn are still wandering about. I think we can come to an agreement that will allow them to live and farm here at the keep under our protection. Danella, I would like you to write them a note explaining that they are not in trouble, I simply think this the best thing for their own safety. If they choose not to stay, they will be allowed to leave."

"Yes, my lady. Thank you," came Danella's reply, grief and gratitude distorting her voice.

"In the meantime, you will serve your term of imprisonment here. In order to keep your skills well honed for your return to service, you will participate in a daily exercise and training regimen."

Turning to Garevel, she whispered, "You'll need to arrange a rotation of guards who will be responsible for supervising her during these sessions." He nodded and turned to leave, but Kallian put her hand on his arm. "I want it made clear they are not to treat her badly. I'm not saying she should get _special_ treatment, just make sure she's not _mis_treated. Am I understood?"

Garevel shifted uncomfortably, but nodded again. "Yes, my lady."

"Take her back to the cells, and collect a quill and parchment along the way so she can write this letter."

Kallian pulled her skirts up and went back to the throne to sit down, only half hearing Varel as he declared the day's court session adjourned and made additional notes in his journal. Kallian was proud she had made it through the event with relative ease, considering how nervous she had been at the start. She hoped she had ruled fairly, and felt she had, but her eyes narrowed as she reflected on several points that bothered her. Finally, she drew herself out of her thoughts and looked to Varel.

"I wish to meet with you, Zev, Nate, Anders, Captain Garevel, Sergeant Maverlies, Mistress Woolsey and Dorothy in one hour, my chambers, to discuss a few changes I'd like to make around here." Standing, she swept out of the room to find Zevran.

xXx

Kallian found Anders and asked him to make Danella his next priority, suggesting that he attempt to discover how she had been treated since her arrest. From there, she tracked down Zevran, finding him sparring with Private Evalyn in the inner bailey, and asked him to join her. On the way to their chambers, they collected some tea and food from the kitchens. Anders and Nathaniel were waiting for them outside their rooms.

Kallian leaned against her desk and waved the Wardens over while Zev put together a meal for them. "Anders, what do you have to report?"

Anders looked grim. "Alec says that he was fed once over the course of two days and Danella says the same." He paused to take some tea from Zevran. "Thank you. Ah...right. Alec's current condition is generally due to malnutrition, and time in our lovely prison did nothing to help. I suspect that he will improve dramatically now that I've had a chance to see to him and you're insisting on better treatment."

"And Danella?"

Anders grinned and promptly looked contrite. "I shouldn't look so..."

"Happy? Maker's breath, I hope you didn't proposition her. That would be highly inappropriate, Anders."

"My dear lady, I am offended," he replied, barely managing to look offended. "I will confess the notion did cross my mind, because she is a lovely girl, but let us not forget that I do have some experience in the matter of imprisonment and being at the mercy of my captors. No, it's more that I suspect things are going to get rather interesting around here."

Kallian's eyes narrowed, which Anders took as encouragement to continue. "She told me that she fully expected to be chased down and arrested, if she couldn't turn herself in first, and when Garevel's men caught up with her, she surrendered."

"I gather they didn't just say 'thanks' and bring her in?" She sat down and ripped some bread from the loaf Zevran had brought up and began eating.

"You are correct. She was roughed up. The bruises on her wrists are from being yanked around by the shackles since her arrest and one of the men backhanded her this morning when she asked for something to drink with her meal."

Kallian was so angry she had difficulty swallow what she had in her mouth and finally drank a mouthful of tea to wash it down. "Who?" she demanded.

"She refused to say and that's when our conversation ended. She fears retribution, of course."

Kallian shook her head. "I will not tolerate that kind of behavior. I won't press the issue with Danella, but if I do find out who did it, I'll backhand him myself and toss him into prison for a few days. Pfft, listen to me. Maker's _balls_." She wiped her mouth with a napkin, pushed her plate away, and began pacing around the room as she thought about what she wanted to say when the others arrived.

Zevran caught her by the wrist as she passed him, his expression grim. "I do not like this either, Kalli, but one step at a time, yes? Calm yourself and try to eat. The others will be here shortly and we will deal with it then."

Smiling at Zevran, she nodded, took her seat, and ate some of the stew he had served her. After a few mouthfuls, she looked at Nathaniel.

"Nate, I wish to make changes around here, but I…well, what do you think?"

He didn't speak immediately. He finished a mouthful of bread, took a sip of tea and leaned back in his chair, fixing his gaze on Kallian.

"The people of this arling have overlooked many things over the years, too many things, and I fear we are now paying for it." From the look on his face and the surprising softness of his voice, Kallian suspected he wasn't just speaking of the people. He spoke slowly and thoughtfully. "Delilah opened my eyes to the reality of what my father became and what he did to this arling. This place can be great again, it can be the hub of trade that it once was, a thriving community. Who better to lead the way than the Hero of Ferelden? You will have my support, Commander."

"Thank you, Nate." She was surprised to feel tightness in her throat and the prickling of tears in her eyes, and took a moment to overcome the wave of emotion that welled up within her. "Do you perceive that anyone here will object to reform?"

He shook his head. "Samuel is the only staff member I recognize from before I was sent to squire in the Free Marches and I don't imagine he will object. Varel is a good man and Mistress Woolsey came with the Grey Wardens, solely dedicated to the treasury. I don't think either of them will resist. I wonder about Captain Garevel, though. I cannot say much of his character beyond what we may have discovered today and my own experience with him."

Kallian looked up from her stew. "Hmm. I do find him to be a bit…well, he always seems rather confused by my concern for the prisoners, their motivation. He was taken aback when I asked if you'd been fed or given water, as though it never occurred to him to do so. I don't know if that's just ignorance or a belief that prisoners don't deserve fair treatment. And then there's this business with Danella. How did he treat you?"

"Well," Nathaniel said with a slight smile, "in his defense, I wasn't as… _compliant_ as Alec and Danella were."

"That isn't what I asked you, Nate. Come on."

He shrugged. "He wasn't a _complete_ ass, not like my father. Set the ground rules and let him know you'll keep an eye on him. If he doesn't shape up, he can be replaced."

Kallian jumped slightly as a knock sounded at the door. "Well, now is the time," she said with a sigh.

Nathaniel shook his head. "Be firm in your convictions, Commander. You have our support and you have already begun to draw the admiration of the staff and the people you've brought to the keep."

Kallian stood, taking a deep breath to steady her nerves. "Thank you, Nate."

Zevran opened the door, admitting Varel, Garevel, Dorothy, Maverlies and Woolsey, followed by Alison and Bronwyn, who brought more goblets and ale with them. The two maids served ale and left again, while chairs were arranged around the room. Kallian looked at the crowded space and decided to find a better room for their office.

Once everyone was settled, she cleared her throat. "I think it's clear Rendon Howe's influence and policies are still being followed here at the keep and to say that I am not happy about it would be an understatement. _I_ am the Arlessa of Amaranthine for the foreseeable future and I need everyone at this keep to be on board with _me_, not the ghost of a cruel man who betrayed this arling and his country, and actively sought to undermine the Grey Warden order, very nearly handing us all over to the darkspawn.

"We will begin anew, today. From this day forward, prisoners of this keep will not be abused in any way, unless they first attack one of us. Even in that circumstance, the prisoner is to be subdued with reasonable force if possible. Any guard found guilty of disobeying this order will be punished. Varel, Garevel, we will have to discuss suitable ways to respond to such offences. These penalties will apply to _any_ member of the keep." She paused to let the significance of that statement settle upon the others.

"Furthermore, all prisoners will be fed three meals a day and provided with enough water to drink and bathe, daily. They will be allowed out to a confined area, under guard, where they will exercise and train for a period time every day. Their _imprisonment_ will be the punishment I mete out, as it is my duty to do so. The abuse, humiliation, starvation and dehydration of our prisoners _will not be tolerated_. Am I understood, Captain Garevel?" She pinned him with a cold stare.

His eyes met hers and he nodded. "Yes, my lady. I understand."

Sensing that he meant it, she continued. "If a prisoner has a skill that may benefit us, I see no reason why we shouldn't take advantage of it. If a prisoner has no skills, they should learn something useful. I do not wish to release weak, unhealthy, underfed and unskilled people back into the arling, for fear they will be forced to return to a life of crime in order to survive.

"Finally, the ban on hunting, fishing and foraging in the forest, rivers and up the mountain around the keep will be lifted and however we get the word out to the people, I want it done immediately. We do need to be careful not to allow too much, however. Perhaps a token fee or a limit on what each family can fish or hunt should be considered."

Varel nodded. "We could reinstate the licensing system the previous arl had in place. I believe it is documented in the library."

"Good, let's look into that as soon as possible. If anyone objects to any of these reforms, they are perfectly welcome to end their employment at the keep and leave, or face the consequences of going against my orders." She stopped talking and looked around the room. Zevran was smiling at her and tipped his head ever so slightly in her direction.

"These reforms have been a long time coming, Commander," Nathaniel spoke up. "As your second, you have my full support and cooperation."

"Thank you. Well, that is all I wished to say at this time. We have much to do for tomorrow. It is my hope we can have Danella's and Alec's families collected and at the keep for tomorrow's celebration, so I want those search parties sent out immediately. If any of you wish to take part in the fishing or hunting parties going out tomorrow morning, feel free to do so, please just let Varel know you'll be gone."

Everyone drifted out of the room eventually, leaving Zevran and Kallian alone. He closed the door and turned on Kallian, pulling her into his arms.

"I think that went well, don't you?"

"I think you did very well. Nate and I will keep an eye on our Captain. I was watching him and I do not think he is a _cruel_ man, just misguided, but we will see." His eyes drifted downwards. "But enough business."

"Do you like what you see?" she asked coyly, pressing her hips forward.

"Very much, my lady Arlessa," came his response, whispered against her forehead. "I have something to show you."

He led her out into the hallway and toward the back of the keep to a room a few doors down from theirs. He opened the door and let her in. It was a small suite of rooms, with two bed chambers along the back wall, the main room they were standing in, which had a fireplace, and a small bath to the left. Kallian walked through each room, finding the entire place completely empty and cleaned spotless. The windows in the bedrooms faced southeast onto the forest and along the mountainside. She returned to Zevran's side, a smile lighting her features.

"A nursery?"

"Yes. The larger room would be for the child, the smaller, his maid's or ours if we need to be closer. Your father has written that he will build our son a bed and wardrobe, and bring it to us in Wintermarch. He will bring Shianni and Soris with him." He pulled a small roll of parchment out of his pocket and handed it to her.

Her eyes glistened with tears as she read the letter and realized just how much she missed her father and cousins. "It will be good to see them again. When did you do this?" she asked, waving a hand around the room.

"The day after you left. The room was very sparsely furnished to begin with, so was easily emptied and cleaned. Several of us were able to do it within a few hours. Do you like it?"

Kallian's smile grew even brighter. "Like it? I _love_ it, Zev. It will be perfect. Thank you so much."

She kissed him and put her arms around his waist, resting her head upon his chest with a contented sigh.

"There is more news," he breathed into her curls. "King Alistair and Anora are to be wed on the fifteenth of Wintermarch and we are invited, of course."

She laughed lightly, enjoying the sound of his voice rumbling in his chest. Tipping her head up to look at him, she kissed his chin. "Of course. Perhaps we can recruit more Wardens and guardsmen while we are there, see how Ser Cauthrien is doing. Maker, I really must write to her in the meantime. I should do that now, while I'm thinking of it."

"Oh no," Zevran chuckled. "No more work this afternoon. You are supposed to be resting, are you not? I think you should take a nap," he whispered into her ear.

She giggled in response and did not object when he swept his arms under her knees and carried her back to their own chambers.

xXx

_1 Firstfall, 9:30_

_This Satinalia comes with much reason to celebrate. When we awoke this morning, Garevel reported that a dozen men and women had arrived in response to our call for recruits to the keep's guard. I am disappointed that none wish to join the Wardens, but I will not complain. We desperately need soldiers, too, and any recruit is a blessing. Zevran will be working with Garevel and Maverlies to see how fit they are before any appointments are made._

_In the meantime, the hunting and fishing parties were very successful. Several large pike, two wild boar and a variety of fowl will be served at the feast this evening, along with deep mushrooms, and an assortment of root vegetables. Every seat in the great hall will be adorned with a bag of sweets and a few silver coins for good luck, prosperity and a sweet life. I've just finished putting them all together now, with the help of Myriani, Aoife, Ana and Brianag, and have sent the ladies off to place them. I managed to find small gifts for the Wardens, and have commissioned Wade to craft a gift for Zevran. In all, I don't think I could have asked for a better Satinalia celebration, given how things were when we first arrived here two weeks ago. _

_I am also very happy to report that Alec's wife Morag and son Donnan were found alive. They are all staying in the infirmary until Anders and Petra are happy they have recovered enough to take up residence elsewhere. The six sheep we found with them have been penned in the outer bailey where Myles is building a shelter for them. With water and grain available, and grazing land nearby, I believe they will do well and may be able to breed in the spring. Danella's parents, Eoghan and Grainne, and their son Marcan, were squatting in an abandoned home not far from the keep. Petra has seen to various injuries, everyone has enjoyed a hot bath and refreshments, and all have agreed to consider my offer of a home and the opportunity to ply their trade under the protection of the keep. Truly, our blessings are many._

_~ KA_

Kallian and Zevran sat on a log within the large ring of light provided by the bonfire, both wrapped in their cloaks, mugs of hot mulled apple cider in their hands. Every single person on the grounds was out, dancing and singing, playing games or simply standing by the fire. Even the young children were nearby, trying to stay awake. The feast had been enjoyed by all and the mood around the fire was light and jolly. Several soldiers had musical instruments – lutes, drums and recorders – and had been playing songs for quite some time now. Rosa and Lucius gnawed on meaty bones nearby and Ser Pounce appeared to be playing a game of tag with Anders and Myriani's daughter Talindra.

The gifts she had purchased for everyone had been well received. She gave Anders a bell collar for Pounce and Nathaniel a new set of locksmith's tools. A bottle of MacKay's Epic Single Malt went to Oghren, and to Mhairi, a book of stories about kings and nobles. Zevran had proven a bit more challenging, and Kallian commissioned Wade to craft a pair of full-tang daggers with ivy engraved along the blades. Ivy represented fidelity and eternity, and adorned their wedding bands. The result was so beautiful, she had almost kissed Wade. The white steel blades and pommels gleamed, the brown and black leather-covered hilts were incredibly comfortable to hold, and they were impeccably balanced. She wasn't entirely certain, but she thought Zevran's eyes looked rather wet when he unwrapped them. He put them on immediately and wore them even now.

His gift to her was a silverite chain and amulet depicting a vhenadahl, the tree of the people. She reached up to her throat and touched it, turning to watch Zevran. He had jumped up to grab Phillip's son Colin, who was running circles around the fire, and was tickling his bare feet. The little boy squealed and laughed with delight. Watching them together, indeed seeing everyone enjoying this moment together, filled her heart with joy.

Zevran's eyes caught hers and he put Colin down, sending the boy on his way with a light pat to the bottom. With a flourish, he bowed and held out a hand. "Will my lady dance?"

Putting on airs, she took his hand and stood, offering him a curtsy. "As you wish, my lord."

As they danced, Kallian offered a prayer of thanks to the Maker and Andraste for the many blessings she enjoyed. She was happy, full and content, and wanted for very little. As if he knew her thoughts, Zevran gave her a squeeze and whispered to her, "We have all we need and soon we shall have a little boy of our own."

She smiled up at him. "Indeed, husband. It seems strange to say it, but I cannot imagine being anywhere else."

* * *

Morag is pronounced MORE-ak  
Eoghan is OH-in, like Owen  
Grainne is GRAW-nya  
Marcan is MAR-kawn


	9. The Trouble with Nobles

**The Trouble with Nobles**

2 Firstfall, 9:30

Zevran and Nathaniel stood along the edge of the training grounds, watching pairs of recruits sparring with practice weapons. Garevel and Maverlies were in the thick of it, swapping weapons amongst the recruits, giving them a chance to use a weapon and shield, a two-handed blade, and daggers. Several of the recruits were reasonably proficient with a sword and shield, a few with daggers, while a brother and sister amongst the group were well skilled with two-handed swords.

"Do you know where these men and women came from, Zev?"

"Some come from the nearby farmlands and others from the city, from what I understand." He turned to look at the Warden. "Why do you ask?"

"Bann Esmerelle was ever loyal to my father. From what I remember of her, and all I learned when I first landed in the City of Amaranthine, I do not imagine she will be all that pleased to know the commander has attracted so many people to the keep. If they have families, they may eventually move here as well, taking even more coin from the Bann's treasury. That is how she will see it."

"Perhaps she is part of this conspiracy against Kallian."

Nathaniel nodded. "It would be wise to assume so. She will be coming to the keep to swear fealty to the Commander. Keep an eye on her."

Zevran nodded and they turned their attention back to the training grounds. "And what do you think of them?" he asked, nodding his head to the recruits.

"If they are willing, I say take the lot of them," Nathaniel replied. "The weaker ones will improve with training. If they do not, they can leave before taking their oath of service."

"Very well, let the Captain know we are in agreement. I must speak with Myriani about where we might have a garden of plants for poisons. With the little ones and animals around, it will not be as easy as I had hoped."

"The battlements and towers may provide suitable areas for container planting," Nathaniel offered. "A tower room could also serve as a place to mix your poisons. Some are fairly spacious and the open windows would provide ample ventilation. I would offer my assistance, but your wife is taking her first archery lesson today." He tipped his head to Zevran's right. "Commander."

"Good morning, Nate. _Marito_," Kallian purred as she slipped her arms around Zevran's waist and snuggled against his side. "It's cold out here." As if to prove her point, she puffed out a breath of air and nodded to the cloud of mist that billowed away. "Must I really stand around shooting at targets?"

Zevran kissed her temple, a hand coming to rest at her waist. "You will be grateful later, mia moglie, when your growing belly makes dancing and tumbling difficult. Nate is an excellent archer and I think you will pick it up quickly. When you are done here, practice your forms, and after dinner, we will work on getting settled in the library, where you can have a raging fire."

She sighed. "I fear by the time we get there, Varel will have pulled several large tomes from the shelves for me to read and lined up hours of work for us both." She pulled away from him and stretched, rolling her head from side to side. "I'll see you in the great hall."

They exchanged quick kisses and Zevran turned back toward the keep as Nathaniel began Kallian's archery lesson.

Zevran took a roundabout route from the training yard to the keep, first stopping briefly to offer tips to the soldiers who were sparring opposite the archery range. From there, he climbed onto the curtain wall and walked from one end of it to the other, looking out over the lands around them. In the immediate area, he could see the hops and barley fields and fallow fields they hoped to plant in the coming spring. Beyond that there were fields of wheat and some pasture lands, and he wondered if they were large enough to provide for everyone living at the keep, as well as the sheep. With that thought in mind, he walked to the inner curtain wall and climbed up to join a guardsman in one of the wall towers.

Turning his attention to the various stalls within the inner bailey, he eyed the half dozen sheep penned there. Myles was making good progress on a shelter for the animals and they seemed to be doing well enough, all things considered. Zevran was somewhat knowledgeable about the production of woolen, having learned about the subject while preparing for an assignment involving a merchant who specialized in fine woolen cloaks and clothing. It was possible that these sheep were of the merino variety, and therefore very likely to produce good quality wool. Good quality wool produced lanolin and yarn, which meant profit. The applications of lanolin, combined with the talents of some of the others now gathered at the keep, made the notion even more intriguing. It was definitely worth mentioning to Kallian and their administrative team.

Shielding them from the sun, Zevran turned his eyes toward the uppermost towers of the keep. The tallest was too far removed from any battlements, but the lower two looked more promising. If they were large enough, they might be useful workspaces. His mind made up, he began the ascent to the towers to investigate further.

xXx

_3 Firstfall, 9:30_

_The arling's nobles began to arrive last night, and there has been a steady stream of people through the gates today. I find I am nervous once again, unaccustomed as I am to matters of politics in spite of all that has happened. I can imagine how much Alistair would laugh at me now, if he knew. _

_We have moved our office to the library, where there is ample seating and writing space, as well as access to many books and documents relating to the arling. Treasury reports, birth and death records, laws passed and repealed, histories, and on it goes. I find the birth and death records rather fascinating, as they detail what each parent looked like at the time, as well as any features of interest on the child. Zevran found several books documenting seasonal planting reports, animal husbandry undertaken at the keep over the years, and the local flora and fauna, and has begun reading several of them. _

_Our sitting room has become a personal sanctuary once again and I have begun to unpack my Blight journals and the other documents I collected as we gathered our armies. I found it surprising how many trinkets I'd kept from our travels, but Zevran laughed and reminded me I usually had two or three back packs of possessions on Bodahn's wagon, in addition to everything I carried. Point taken._

_I found myself in the awkward position of having to ask Varel, Woolsey and Nate what I should wear during the oaths of fealty ceremony – armor or finery. Varel suggested I remind them of who and what I am, the Warden Commander of the Ferelden Grey and Hero of Ferelden. Armor for the ceremony, a gown for the banquet afterward. Fair enough, but I fear my armor will be uncomfortable. I have yet to discuss with Wade what exactly I should do about it. My good health and expanding waist make some sets less comfortable to wear. My best gown is the one I wore for my wedding, and thankfully it has been altered around the bodice ever so slightly, using some of the fabric from the ample skirts, and looks as lovely as ever. Maker help me, am I writing about fashion? Leliana would be so pleased._

_~ KA_

Kallian was staring at her reflection in the mirror, trying to decide if her slightly bulging belly was comfortable enough in her armor, when Zevran called to her from their sitting room.

"I have a surprise for you, amore."

"What, that we don't have to do this after all? Because that would be _great_." she grumbled as she crossed the room to the doorway. Looking up, she saw Leliana standing with Zevran, a bright smile on her face, and she rushed over to them. "Leli!"

The two women greeted each other a quick kiss to each cheek.

"I am so glad to see you. Your timing couldn't be better."

Leliana laughed and pulled Kallian back toward the bed chamber. "Yes, I can see you have no idea what to do with your hair. I will help you, mon amie."

Kallian's hand drifted up to the mass of unruly curls that hung about her head and shoulders. "Ah, well thanks for pointing _that_ out, but that's not what I meant, I…I feel so out of place now when it's politics and conspiracy, not battle," she whispered.

Leliana shushed her and made her stand at the vanity. She began working her fingers through Kallian's hair, taming it, and arranged it in a loosely twisted figure eight, which she then pinned in place with deft fingers. "I thought this would be the perfect time for me to observe the nobles." She stood back to inspect her work. Nodding with satisfaction, she turned Kallian around.

"Let me worry about the mystery and intrigue, while you charm the nobles, oui? This is your chance to get to know them, as much as it is theirs to get to know you. Make use of it, and tomorrow, when they are gone, we will talk."

"All right." Kallian turned to look at Zevran, who had been observing from the doorway. "How many people are we talking about?"

"Fourteen have arrived, an equal number of men and women. Nate tells me the two most important of the group are Bann Esmerelle, who resides in the city, of course, and Lord Eddelbrek, who is a minor lord with a significant amount of land in the Feravel Plains to the northwest of the keep. He, apparently, was not so fond of Rendon Howe, whereas she was."

Kallian nodded slowly, considering what he said. "Well then, if I had to guess who wants me out, I'd say the Bann is the most likely suspect. I caught a glimpse of her earlier when she first arrived and she was not being in the least bit kind to Alison and Elspeth." When Leliana raised a questioning eyebrow, she qualified, "Elven staff members. Stands to reason she won't warm up to _me_ very quickly. Shall we?" She gestured toward the front of their suite.

Nodding, both Zevran and Leliana followed her to the hallway and down to the main floor.

xXx

In the antechamber off the side of the throne room, Varel greeted Kallian with a smile. "The lords and ladies of Amaranthine are now all assembled to swear fealty to you and the Grey Wardens. These were Arl Rendon Howe's vassals and now they will be yours." He couldn't help noticing that the air of tension that had filled her earlier in the day was now gone, replaced with an air of relaxed authority.

"What do I need to know about them?" she asked, adjusting her armor.

"As you know, some of these people bore Rendon no love, but others had their prospects dashed with his demise. Tread carefully, commander." He reached out for the door handle, waiting for her.

"Hmm. Well, I was expecting as much. Thank you."

Kallian took a deep breath and nodded to Varel. He pulled open the door to the throne room and stepped inside.

"Lords and ladies, I present the Warden-Commander of Ferelden and Arlessa of Amaranthine."

Kallian strode into the room, followed closely by Zevran and Nathaniel. There was a low rumbling of voices as they joined Varel, Woolsey and Garevel near the throne. Kallian heard someone ask "Isn't that Rendon's boy?" while another expressed some surprise that she was an elf. She smiled and surveyed the men and women standing around the room. An elderly man with white hair was on one knee at the front of the group.

"Commander," he said, bowing his head.

Knowing she would have to persuade many of these people into being loyal to her and the Grey Wardens, she was prepared to appeal to their better natures. "Our differences are many, but our cause is one." Smiling to the man at her feet, she waved him up off the floor.

"Lord Eddelbrek, my liege," Varel said with a nod to the lord before him. Lowering his voice, he asked Kallian, "Shall we begin?"

At Kallian's nod of approval, Varel addressed the room. "Bann Esmerelle, as is old custom, you have the honor of beginning."

The woman Kallian had seen arrive earlier in the day stepped forward, her hair pulled back, her face stern, and spoke. "I promise that I, Bann Esmerelle, will be faithful to the arling in matters of life, limb and earthly honor. Never will I bear arms against her or her heirs. So I say in the sight of the Maker."

Kallian watched Esmerelle closely, noticing the bann's stiff posture and the way her eyes never quite met Kallian's. She took an immediate disliking to the woman. Lord Eddelbrek stepped forward and repeated the oath. This man was a different story. He looked more at ease and maintained eye contact, and generally appeared to have more respect for Kallian than many of the others in the room.

When everyone present had sworn the oath of fealty, it was Eddelbrek who approached her first. "It is an honor to meet you, my liege," he said with slight bow of his head. "You come to us in desperate times."

Another man, whose name Kallian couldn't remember, had followed Eddelbrek and huffed with disdain upon hearing him. "Not more about your precious farms, Lord Eddelbrek."

Eddelbrek looked discouraged, but continued to appeal to Kallian. "Some in our arling do not have the comfort of city walls. On the plains, the situation is dire."

"What seems to be the problem, Lord Eddelbrek?" Kallian asked, deliberately stepping between him and the other man. Putting her hand on his arm, she steered Eddelbrek away from the others.

"While we feast, my liege, peasants are starving or worse. There have been darkspawn attacks and…"

"The city's defenses are more important," the other lord countered as he trailed along behind them.

Eddelbrek frowned. "You may have wheat in your silos now, but if the farmers die, where will you get your food?"

The other man made an exasperated noise, shook his head and wandered off toward Bann Esmerelle. Kallian watched him as he spoke to the bann, then turned back to Eddelbrek.

"Lord Eddelbrek, I happen to agree with you, but I think it would be wise to keep that between the two of us for the time being."

Eddelbrek nodded, a slight smile toying with his lips as he tipped his head to her. "As you wish, my liege."

Bann Esmerelle approached them, an air of self importance hanging around her. Kallian found that she felt thoroughly uncomfortable in the woman's presence, but she took a steadying breath and turned to greet the bann with what she hoped was a genuine smile. Whether or not she was successful, the bann certainly wasn't. She was clearly unhappy that Eddelbrek had managed to get Kallian's attention first.

"I see Lord Eddelbrek wastes no time petitioning you for soldiers to protect his farms. Do not be deceived, Commander. His livelihood is all he cares about. Amaranthine is the jewel of the arling and must be protected."

The woman's attitude grated on Kallian's nerves, but she maintained a pleasant demeanor. "We have begun a recruiting campaign for both the Grey Wardens and the keep's guard, and I anticipate that we will be able to send more soldiers out to the areas where they are most needed, and soon. I wonder, Bann Esmerelle, if you shouldn't also consider recruiting for the city guard, if you are in need of more soldiers."

Esmerelle kept the smile on her face, but a slight twitch along her jaw muscle hinted at her displeasure. She continued to attempt to build her case for more protection for a short time before Kallian stated that she would take the matter under advisement and discuss it with her staff. The bann gracefully excused herself from the Warden Commander's presence and drifted away. Kallian took a deep breath and squeezed Lord Eddelbrek's arm.

"We will speak again, Lord Eddelbrek, but know this. I have lifted the hunting, fishing and foraging ban that Rendon Howe had in place around the keep. We will be returning to a licensing system as soon as possible, but given the urgency of the situation, I will allow you unrestrained access for the time being." She looked around the room and caught Woolsey's and Varel's attention, waving them over. "See to it that your people are fed, Eddelbrek."

The elderly man smiled and bowed, taking her hand in his to press his lips to her fingers. "Thank you, my liege."

When Varel and Woolsey arrived, she instructed them to meet with Eddelbrek immediately following the ceremony to discuss their new arrangement. "I'll leave you to it, then. If you'll excuse me, I wish to mingle with the others."

Kallian drifted around the room, stopping to speak with her fellow Wardens as well as the nobles. She spotted Leliana and Zevran, alternately observing their guests from a distance and engaging them in conversation. Nathaniel had all but melted into the background, and Anders appeared to have gained the attention of a pretty, female knight named Ser Tamra. They were with Oghren, near the large keg that kept him company, their heads close together in discussion. Anders' manner was flirtatious and his hand occasionally drifted up to rest upon the woman's upper arm. Kallian groaned inwardly, wondering if she would have to speak to him about this sort of behavior before every single event or outing. When she felt she had spent enough time engaged in meaningless small talk, she approached Varel.

"Let's end this for now and remind everyone of the feast this evening."

"Yes, Commander." Varel strode off to herd the nobles out of the throne room.

Kallian waved to her companions, who gathered around. "You're on your own from now until this evening's feast, and tomorrow morning we will discuss the day's events. I want your impressions of the nobles. Anders, a word?" she asked as the others left.

"No doubt you are wondering about the good ser knight?"

"As a matter of fact, _yes_." She looped her arm through Zevran's and motioned to the door near the throne. The three of them began walking.

Anders kept his voice low. "It seems Ser Tamra is in possession of some information that supports the suspicions regarding a conspiracy against you. Several letters that by themselves mean little, but when looked at collectively, paint a different picture. She is quite clever, but she is understandably nervous that she may be found out, so she left the missives behind."

"There is no need for her to endanger herself any further," Kallian murmured as they stepped into the antechamber. "We are aware of the threat and I _think_ we have a good idea who's at the heart of it. She should just keep the letters hidden and stay safe for now, we'll take care of it. Find a way to get that message to her discreetly, all right?"

Anders smirked and nodded. Sighing, Kallian gave him permission to leave, laughing as the door to the hallway slammed shut behind him. "Maker help us all," she sighed.

Zevran chuckled. "He is almost as much a menace to society as I am."

"_Was_, you mean."

"Do I?" he asked as he pulled Kallian closer.

Pressing his lips to hers, he kissed her passionately. She responded in kind, heat rising to her cheeks. Pulling away from him, gasping for breath, she laughed.

"Imagine, making love here in this room, while the others waited out there for us…"

"Do not tempt me, woman. We do not have time for this," Zevran chided with a somewhat serious expression on his face. "Besides, you are in your armor."

"Later then, mio marito."

He growled and stole another kiss from his wife. "Indeed, mia moglie, later."

xXx

4 Firstfall, 9:30

The evening's feast had been a success in Kallian's eyes, and had provided further opportunity for her and the others to observe and interact with the nobles. By midday, all their guests had departed for their own homes, and she had gathered the Wardens, Leliana, Zevran, Varel, Woolsey and Garevel in the library. There was no doubt in anyone's mind that Bann Esmerelle was the one person most likely to want Kallian out of the way, and most able to rally others to her cause.

"The woman rubbed me the wrong way the moment I first laid eyes on her. She is insufferably rude to the _hired help_, she moves and speaks with a…a sense of privilege that infuriates me, she lost much with Rendon's downfall and it certainly doesn't help that she bears no love for elves," Kallian said from her perch on the arm of Zevran's chair near the fire. "I don't suppose having a sour personality is enough reason to think her guilty…"

Nathaniel chuckled. "When she thought she was out of ear shot from anyone else, she did speak rather disparagingly of you."

"Well. There you go, then," Kallian muttered with a bitter laugh.

Mhairi spoke up. "She does seem rather fond of Lord Guy and his wife." Anders and Oghren named two other men who had spent a great deal of time with the bann during the ceremony and banquet.

Leliana and Zevran muttered their agreement and the room grew quiet, save for the crackling of the fire in the library's hearth. The Wardens and administrative team alike were pensive, staring into the flames as they drank from their goblets and considered the matter before them. Zevran finally broke the silence.

"You wish to head out along the Pilgrim's Path in two days, yes?" Kallian nodded. "Then I suggest that we let Leliana handle this situation while you and the Wardens prepare for that journey. You will have to write to Alistair about this."

"Yes. I think at least two of his soldiers have decided to return to Denerim, so I'll send a letter with them."

The group dispersed until only the two of them remained. Kallian offered Zevran a coy smile, taking his hand. "And what exactly do you have planned now?"

"Not what you might think, tesora, at least not right away. No, I wish to show you what I have been up to lately."

"Ooh, intriguing."

Kallian allowed Zevran to lead her toward the back of the keep and up to a tower room. The narrow staircase led to a room with a small fireplace and an alcove with space to store wood, a cauldron and utensils. There was enough room for a table and chair, more if needed, it had windows, and it had access to the roof. From there they could see farther than they had from any other point at the keep and Kallian was stunned by the beauty of it. The landscape was a mottled tapestry of oranges, yellows, reds and various shades of green; the sky was blue; the air crisp and clean and it was surprisingly quiet.

She took a deep breath and leaned back into Zevran's arms. "You'll be able to grow your plants and herbs up here?"

"Hmm," he murmured as he nuzzled her neck. "It will be hard work getting the dirt and materials required up here, but a pulley system from the lower level of the keep is possible. No matter how we do it, I think it will be worth it. This provides ample space for both Nate and me to work on poisons and the like for the Wardens and guard without endangering anyone else."

He heard her sigh, felt her relax against him, and he smiled. They enjoyed the view for a few minutes before her posture changed and she lifted her head. He couldn't help thinking Kallian resembled an animal, sniffing the air for signs of friend, foe or prey. She didn't seem alarmed or on edge, however, and he waited and watched as she paced along the rooftop wall and eventually stopped to stare to the southeast.

"Maker's breath," she breathed as she waved Zevran over.

"What is it, darkspawn?"

She shook her head. "No, I don't think so. I…I think it's…_Kristoff_."

She turned to face him. "I've been so close to darkspawn for so long now, had them right under my feet, I sometimes stop really _listening_ to it." She absentmindedly rubbed a hand across her shoulder and flexed her back muscles as if reacting to the ever-present crawling sensation of the taint in her veins. "This is different, like Oghren and the others, a more…pleasant hum. It's a fair distance away, but it's _there_."

She closed her eyes and tipped her head back, slipping into a more meditative state. After a while she shook her head again. "I need to hone this ability, meditate daily, perhaps. Come, let's go. I'm cold."

As they descended the stairs and made their way back through the maze of hallways to their chambers, she made up her mind. As long as she had the sense that Kristoff was alive and in the area, she had to assume he was headed to the Blackmarsh. That being the case, she would take the Wardens to the Wending Woods to investigate claims that merchants were being attacked there.

* * *

**A/N:** As always, my thanks to Bioware and to my beta reader, Mille Libri, and a shout out to Zevgirl and Zute – read their stuff! Last, but by no means least, my gratitude goes out to everyone who reads, reviews, alerts and favorites these stories. Reviews are great, please comment!


	10. A Walk in the Woods

**A Walk in the Woods**

_5 Firstfall, 9:30_

_We have spent a better part of the day preparing to depart for the Wending Woods in the morning. I will be taking all four Wardens with me, as we will also be investigating Mervis' claim that there may be a darkspawn lair in the woods. I think it best to leave Lucius and Rosa here to help our guard protect the keep and the surrounding area. The guard is now twenty-five strong with the new recruits, and Sers Aiden and Marcus, who have decided to stay with us. However, we will have many people in and out of the gates all day long, and between the keep, the farmlands and the city, our soldiers can only be in so many places. It may be in our interest to breed mabari hounds, and I have asked Varel to give the idea consideration and to look into the state of the kennels we have. _

_Our little community continues to strengthen and the inner bailey's market is now quite busy all day. People aren't only there to shop, but also to meet to discuss plans for the surrounding lands, the rebuilding of homes within and around the keep's walls, commercial ventures, the gardens and conservatory, hunting, fishing…on it goes. I couldn't be happier with the results so far. I have asked Varel to keep the great hall open for this same purpose on days when the weather is miserable, so that the people of the keep will always have a place to gather. It has occurred to me that the keep's chapel should be restored for our spiritual needs and I have added this to the growing list of projects that Myles has agreed to undertake._

_Some merchants have arrived from the north east coastal trade route and I believe Mistress Woolsey is quite pleased with the discussions she's had with them so far. I am very grateful to Lillith for her help in building our network of merchants, and have offered her a small cottage within the outer bailey, near Yuriah's and Alexi's homes. She has accepted and agreed to use the keep as her base._

_For the past few days, Anders has been getting used to wearing a suit of armor. He has chosen to use a sword and shield and has been sparring with Ser Aiden. I am not surprised that Anders has taken so quickly to the armor and weaponry, as I expected that having a defense against templars would appeal to him. As strong as he is, fists are not effective against swords. His mastery of the magical talents he possesses is evident in the way he has become accustomed to casting without the use of a staff. _

_As for me, Wade made an entirely new set of armor for me at Zevran's request. It is fashioned from the same white steel as the daggers I gave him on Satinalia. Wade engraved a griffon on the breast plate and Zevran had him engrave ivy around the wrists of the gloves and on the boots, too. The suit fits perfectly and can be adjusted with additional plates, so it should work well for the duration of my pregnancy. Wade is a genius and Zevran continues to surprise me._

_~ KA_

Kallian put down her quill, closed her journal and looked up to find Zevran watching her from where he sat across from her desk in the library. "What?" she asked with a smile.

"I would ask you the same, tesora," he replied as he stood and walked to stand behind her. Putting his hands on her shoulders, he bent to kiss her head. "You look rather pleased with yourself."

"Perhaps I am. We are doing well, Anders is learning the ways of the arcane warrior and taking to armor quite nicely, and I have a wonderfully thoughtful husband. You must know of him."

"Hmm, perhaps." Zevran slid his hands over her shoulders and down to her breasts, cupping them in his hands. She gasped as he pinched her nipples through the thin fabric of her tunic and breast band, gently rolling the stiffening peaks between his thumbs and forefingers. Her breasts had become more sensitive lately, and he delighted in the responses he could pull from her by fondling her this way.

"What are you doing?" she asked breathlessly, reaching up to stroke his arms.

Zevran dipped his head down to hers to whisper in her ear. "What do you think I am doing?" he asked, taking the tip of her ear between his lips.

"Mmmm…ha…distracting me…not that I'm…asking you to…ssstop." She gasped, arching her back to press into his hands, her face and neck flushed with desire.

"Would you like to join me in our bedchamber?" He doubted they would make it that far.

She stood and turned to face him, a lusty smile on her face, and kissed him. He pulled her into a tight embrace, crushing her sensitive breasts to his chest, and their kisses became frantic. Kallian ground against Zevran, feeling him hardening, and she was overwhelmed with desire for him. Pulling him back onto her desk, she rolled them over and sat on top of him, unfastening his shirt as their mouths locked in another kiss. In their passion, they were unaware of Elspeth, who, as she passed by, quietly closed the door to the library to give them their privacy.

xXx

6 Firstfall, 9:31

The Wardens departed from the keep on foot shortly after the morning meal, their packs filled with supplies for the coming days. Kallian didn't want to risk losing the horses to darkspawn, travelling as they were without the dogs. They had enough dried rations to last for several nights of camping between the keep and the Wending Woods, and the location of numerous drinking wells marked on their map.

It was becoming a tradition for the residents of the keep to see the Wardens off, regardless of the weather, and Kallian smiled as everyone, from Varel to the staff to the smallest of children, braved the cold morning rain to gather in the outer bailey to pay their respects. Zevran took Kallian's face in his hands and kissed her good bye, drawing a murmur of approval from the onlookers.

"Be safe, tesora, and may the Maker watch over you both," he whispered to her, a hand lingering at her midriff. Turning to the others, he flashed a brilliant smile and waved. "Good luck to you, my friends. A warm hearth and a hot meal will await you upon your return. Maker watch over you."

A cheer rose from the crowd as the Wardens passed through the gates.

xXx

7 Firstfall, 9:30

The rain slowed the Wardens down and they set up camp by mid-afternoon under the shelter of a rocky outcropping so they could light a fire and dry out for the night. Nathaniel caught several rabbits, while Anders and Kallian set about making a broth for stew with root vegetables, deep mushrooms and some of the herbs and spices Zevran had sent with them. They settled back to enjoy their dinner and told stories well into the night.

After they struck camp in the morning, Kallian, Mhairi and Nathaniel took the lead while Anders and Oghren followed behind, trying to outdo one another by singing every bawdy song they knew. Kallian found herself humming along with the songs Leliana had taught them during the Blight. As the morning progressed, the forest began to get thicker, the path narrower, and Kallian and her team eventually found themselves climbing a gentle hill that took them deeper into the heart of the Wending Woods. Eventually they all paused, smelling something unsettling beneath the usual odors of the forest.

"Do you smell that?" Kallian asked, her nose wrinkling in disgust as a hand drifted to her armored belly. She swallowed hard, trying to ignore the taste of bile in her throat.

Nathaniel nodded, a grim look on his face. "I do, and it does not bode well."

"Aye," Oghren growled. "That's the stench of death."

Kallian slowly moved her head from side to side, sniffing the air, until she finally turned to their left and walked toward a cliff that dropped off into what appeared to be a dry river bed. Mhairi followed, peering into the distance with a spyglass.

"Whatever it is, it's over there somewhere," Kallian pointed to the horizon. She couldn't help but notice that the forest was getting quieter as they entered its depths.

"I see naught but hills and trees from here, Commander," Mhairi reported, collapsing the spyglass.

Anders cleared his throat. "We're going off to find the cause of that smell, are we?" Kallian simply looked at him. "Of course we are," he mumbled.

They didn't manage to get much further along the path before Kallian shouted "Darkspawn!" and they were forced to battle against a small group of the beasts.

She was surprised to find that Anders could protect them all with an arcane shield. It took her a moment to get used to the shimmering field around her, but she immediately appreciated the additional protection it afforded her. Kallian's armor performed well, giving her the mobility she needed to spin and tumble away from and between the darkspawn, without squeezing and pinching her torso. Indeed, they all fought well with their new equipment and quickly overcame their enemies. As they regained their breath, Kallian searched the corpses for anything of interest. Amongst the usual potions, poultices, coin and such, she found a necklace tucked into the breastplate of one hurlock's armor.

"This is elven," she muttered, holding the trinket up by its chain for the others to see. "Strange. I've known the occasional darkspawn to wear an enchanted accessory it's found, but this is almost like a keepsake." Shrugging, she tucked it into her own breastplate.

As Anders set fire to the corpses, Mhairi drew the group's attention to the south east.

"Smoke, Commander," she said, giving Kallian the spyglass and pointing to a rising column of black smoke in the distance.

Kallian could see that several trees were on fire and if she wasn't mistaken, a group of men were fighting walking sylvan trees, something she had first seen in the Brecilian Forest. A nearby caravan was also on fire, its contents of crates and sacks scattered around. As she stood there, the crawling feeling along her shoulders intensified and she couldn't help but feel as though she were being watched. The sensation was quite unnerving and she had to take a moment to settle her nerves before she could report her observations to her team.

"_Living_ trees? As in _walking around_?" Mhairi asked, her eyes wide with disbelief and fear, knuckles white as she gripped her sword.

"I have heard of such things, Commander, but never seen them." Nathaniel's brow pulled together with more force than usual as he readied his bow and arrows.

Kallian nodded, adding, "I have a bad feeling about this. I…I think someone's _watching_ us, you know?"

Even as she said it, she caught the others peering into the trees around them, and knew they understood. They all shared a knowing look, their bond as a team growing rapidly, and prepared themselves for a fight. Oghren took a bolstering swig from his flask and gripped his battle axe while Anders cast a protective spell on them all. Kallian pulled her own daggers out and led the group down the path toward the skirmish.

xXx

When the last of the charred sylvan trees fell to the ground, the forest was eerily silent. Some bandits had succumbed to the trees' branches, while others had turned on the Wardens only to be slain. Anders slipped into his now well-practiced routine of assessing everyone's injuries and treating them according to severity, beginning with Kallian who had a branch protruding from the armor covering the fleshy part of her left arm. She refused to let him put her to sleep and instead endured having the wood removed with only a minor pain-relieving spell, her teeth clamped down on a pair of leather gloves they'd found in her pack to prevent her from screaming out loud. After a break for healing, what armor repairs they could manage, and some food and water, they continued along the path as it turned to the north, toward a bridge.

As they began to cross the bridge, a man dressed in leather armor came running down the path toward them.

"Get out of my way, I need to get out of here!" he yelled as he slid to a stop in front of Kallian, blocked by the group.

Kallian scanned the path behind him, seeing nothing. "What's wrong, can we help?"

"No! No one can help me. I just need to get out of here!" He kept looking over his shoulder as though a darkspawn horde was bearing down on him, but Kallian and the others could see nothing.

"Who's after you?" Kallian asked, continuing to scan the hill behind him.

He turned to look back the way he'd come, whispering, "The elf. She makes the trees come alive. All we wanted was some easy money from the caravans, and…"

He stopped and listened and Kallian thought she could hear the sound of wood creaking. The ground trembled beneath her feet, so much so that she nearly lost her balance. The scavenger yelped.

"Maker help me, she's here! Gotta get away…" He turned and pushed his way around Kallian and the others.

"Sodding nug humper," Oghren growled, gripping Kallian's arm to steady her.

Before Kallian could respond, a nearby overhang shook, roots shot out of the earth with a resounding cracking sound, and a moment later they retreated, revealing a scantily clad female Dalish elf. She stared down at them, anger contorting her features and making her posture rigid.

"Who are you and why are you here? Are you working for the shemlen? I would leave the forest if I were you, or it will end badly for you!" she shouted down to Kallian.

Kallian could hear Anders snorting with indignation behind her and shot him a silencing glare before looking back up at the elf, holding her hands out before her. "I mean you no harm. Why was that man afraid of you?"

"These caravans belong to the forest now. He sought to take what was not his."

"Have _you_ been destroying the caravans?"

"After all the shemlen did to me…did to my people…this is justice! They stole my sister and likely sold her to merchants. I will not rest until I have her back! I have no quarrel with you. I would hate for that to change." The woman raised her hands and summoned a ball of roots up out of the ground around her.

"Wait!" Kallian shouted out, but it was too late. The elf was gone again, the woods quiet.

"By the stone, another bitchy witch," Oghren mumbled.

Kallian laughed uneasily; the woman had resembled Morrigan in many ways. "I don't think I want to know what happened to her to push her this far, but we have no choice." She looked up the path heading north. "Let's see what we can find."

xXx

The party moved deeper into the forest, pausing to search for tracks or any other signs of habitation. Shattered caravans dotted the landscape and crates and sacks of merchants' goods lay about. Kallian and the others put these things aside to collect later and carried on, eyes scanning the forest for signs of life. As they worked their way through the woods, Oghren spotted a rocky section of the landscape that he insisted was worth investigating. He let out a shout as he got closer to it.

"By the stone, Commander, do you know what this is? Granite, plain and simple, girlie, and there's lots of it! Mark this spot on your map, because we're gonna want this for the keep's walls."

"_Girlie_?" Nathaniel mumbled with the slightest hint of a smile as he made note of the granite's location on their map.

"He's a little rough around the edges, I'll give you that." Kallian grinned in response. "But he's right. Voldrik wants granite. Lucky find."

They carried on and passed what appeared to be a mine entrance, pausing to make note of it on their map, and continued up the hill until they came upon an abandoned Dalish camp. It was set within ruins atop a hill with a good view out over the surrounding forest. From the moment they stumbled upon the camp, nothing about it made any sense. A Ferelden soldier's blade had been thrust into the ground at the entrance to the camp, and a pile of similar swords and daggers had been tossed into the center of the area. The Dalish traveled in large groups, and had hallas to move their aravels, but there were only three of the moving homes here and no halla to be found anywhere. Most disturbing was a row of shallow graves nearby, which looked to have been dug recently. Kallian walked around the camp, looking into the aravels, poking through any crates and sacks that had been left out, until she finally returned to the pile of weapons. The Wardens gathered around Kallian as she stared down at the weaponry.

"Looks like there was some sort of fight." Oghren pointed to dark brown splotches on the ground. "No bodies, though, just these weapons. Hmmm." He rubbed his chin as he grumbled to himself.

Kallian hunched down over the blades. They weren't the best money could buy and some were definitely not worth using, but most simply needed to be cleaned and sharpened. "Dalish elves wouldn't use such weapons, and dwarves certainly prefer dwarven crafted swords. These blades may not be worth much, but they are worth _something_, and I can't imagine humans would leave them behind. I wouldn't."

Nathaniel agreed with a quick nod of his head. "This is odd."

"I don't understand this," she said, waving a hand around the camp as she stood. "So…this must be where that mage has been living, and we have to assume that the poor souls buried here are her clan members, or friends…Maker, her family? Someone comes in, attacks the camp, kills some of them, makes off with her sister, she somehow survives and now she seeks justice, revenge. Against human_ merchants_…" _Maybe merchants might leave behind weapons they couldn't repair or sell, _Kallian thought to herself. _Maybe someone wanted it to look that way?_

A shift in the direction of the wind distracted her, bringing with it the stench they had observed earlier in the day. The sun was high in the sky and the afternoon was surprisingly warm. Her stomach lurched as she realized that whatever lay rotting to the north west was cooking as the temperatures rose. With a sigh, she turned and led her team back down the path toward the mine and then to the west. As the smell they were tracking grew stronger and drew them toward a cliff, Anders spoke.

"Are you sure you want to…I mean, don't you think you might prefer it if Nate, Oghren and I were to…"

Kallian cut him off with a wave of her hand. "Oh please, Anders, I'm not that deli…"

She stopped dead in her tracks, with a view over the cliff, unable to finish her sentence, the others gagging and retching behind her. The bodies of at least two dozen men and women in varying states of decay were scattered in a pit below them. With her keen eyesight she could see how many of them had died. Skulls bashed in, necks broken, torsos crushed. It was as horrifying and sickening as anything she had seen during the Blight and the stench was now overpowering. She doubled over and threw up, vaguely aware that someone had grabbed her by her belt to prevent her from falling into the pit below.

"Thank you, Mhairi," she gasped when she righted herself again and saw who had held her. "Oh Maker, Anders, if there is _ever_ a next time, and I pray there never will be, _please_ feel free to be more forceful. I did _not_ need to see that." She walked away from the pit to lean against a tree and rinsed her mouth out with water.

"We need to…" she nodded back toward the pit. "They shouldn't be left like that, but…but we need to know who they are. I…"

Mhairi stepped forward. "Commander, after you defeated the archdemon, I helped identify the dead soldiers. I will collect any personal effects there are to be found."

"Thank you, Mhairi. I have ink, parchment and a quill in my pack." She slid her pack off her shoulders and began searching for her journal.

Oghren took them from her when she pulled them out. "I'll go with her. You drink yer water."

"Pfft. Thanks."

Within the hour, they had gathered wedding rings, necklaces, ledgers, journals and other paperwork that would identify the merchants and had packed it up. Kallian turned to Anders and nodded.

In a solemn voice, he recited a line from the Chant of Light that felt fitting. "The one who repents, who has faith, unshaken by the darkness of the world, she shall know true peace."

He cast a firestorm spell over the pit, incinerating everything that lay within it, and they continued along the path. They were headed south again, and eventually came to the dry riverbed they had first spotted when they entered this section of Wending Woods. Kallian stopped, a strange sensation tugging at her consciousness.

"What is it, Commander?" Nathaniel asked.

She closed her eyes and slipped into a meditative state. "Someone…I can feel someone else here, someone who's tainted, but not darkspawn. Not a Warden, either."

Opening her eyes again, she turned around and followed the pull of the taint up a hill to a small clearing where a campsite was set up. A wounded militiaman was lying on the ground and Kallian knew immediately that he was too tainted to be saved by the Joining ceremony. She knelt by his side as he stirred and opened his eyes.

"Don't look…don't look at me."

"Shh, it's okay. Anders, help me." Kallian pulled her canteen and a handkerchief off her belt, handing them both to Anders.

"But he's…"

She shook her head and nodded to the handkerchief. "Wet it, please, Anders."

Anders did as she asked and handed the wet cloth back to Kallian. She pressed it to the man's forehead and face, then to his lips. The relief would be temporary; the fever was raging through him.

"Who are you?" Kallian asked.

"Olaf…my name. Came with friends to drive away the elf, but the darkspawn were too quick. Ripped apart, biting teeth and slashing claws…darkness, then I awoke, flesh and bone and gristle under me, around me, everywhere. One dead, soft meat melting into the ground. I crawled away, came here, can't stand to see it."

More than one Warden behind her was gagging, Mhairi and Anders, if she had to guess. "Olaf, where did the darkspawn come from?"

"Beneath, around, from the shadows."

"But you and your friends didn't kill the elves?" She brushed strands of hair from his face and reapplied the wet cloth.

"No, no, darkspawn came first, slaughtered us, took our steel, brought it to the elven camp. Tricked us and the elf. Now she thinks we are to blame. Wants all in her rage while they watch."

Anders was appalled. "So all these people died over a _misunderstanding_? Maker, that's horrible. We have to stop her, tell her she's wrong. If we search the woods we might be able to find her again."

"The dark ones are curious about you, too." Olaf continued, trying to focus on Kallian. "They watch you as well as her. Can you feel them?"

Mhairi gasped. "Commander…"

"I know, Mhairi." Kallian's skin crawled at the man's words, knowing her suspicions earlier were justified, but she couldn't spare the time worrying about it. "Do you know anything about the elf's sister?"

"Sister? I have a sister. No…elf's sister. No, we didn't take her. Probably dead or eaten."

Oghren grunted and took a swig from his canteen. "That would be a blessing."

Kallian shuddered, knowing full well he was remembering the broodmother they had killed in the Deep Roads. She turned her attention back to Olaf. He was suffering, he would die a slow and painful death, and there was really only one thing she could do for him. It pained her to think it, to know that killing an innocent man, a victim of circumstance, was preferable to letting him live. _It is the merciful thing to do_, she told herself as she swallowed the lump in her throat.

"Olaf, I am _so_ sorry, but there's nothing we can do for you. This disease will kill you."

"Am already dead, am already gone. Please…make it end. _Please_," he begged, his eyes clearing in a moment of lucidity.

Kallian swallowed hard and looked to Anders, who knelt beside her, his eyes searching hers. "Ease his pain," was all she said as she pulled a dagger from her belt. Anders' hand glowed blue momentarily and Olaf relaxed.

Smiling at Olaf, Kallian leaned forward to whisper in his ear. "May the Maker have mercy on you, Olaf." With a quick motion she thrust her dagger into his heart and placed her hand over his eyes to close them as he died.

She stood up quickly, dropped her dagger and walked several paces away, trying to contain the emotions she was feeling. All she'd witnessed here, the pointlessness of the elf's revenge, and the idea that they were pawns in some game the darkspawn were playing made her angry and sad and fearful for what was to come. She squeezed her eyes shut and swallowed hard, trying to shake the feeling of vulnerability that was slowly creeping into her consciousness. Oghren was at her side, holding out his canteen.

"You did the right thing, boss."

Kallian took a swig of ale and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "I know, but that doesn't make it easier."

"Didn't expect it would, but it's the truth." He clapped her on the shoulder, took his canteen, and walked back to the others.

Anders stood up and looked at the dwarf. "Is she all right?"

"Yeah, she'll be fine. Him, we should burn like you folks do with your kind." He picked up Kallian's dagger and wiped it clean, sliding it into his belt to return to her later.

The Wardens stretched Olaf out and crossed his arms over his chest. Kallian turned and walked back to stand with them. Clearing her throat, she nodded to Anders. Fire danced along his fingers until he held a large ball of it in his hands and a moment later Olaf's corpse burst into flame.

The feeling that she was being watched returned as the taint danced in her veins. "We've got company!" Kallian yelled as a group of blighted wolves emerged from a stand of trees across the clearing.

Nathaniel's arrows quickly struck down two of the wolves, while another four managed to make it across the field to engage the other Wardens. Oghren bellowed out in rage and swung his battle axe in front of him, ripping the head off one wolf and knocking another into a tree several feet away. It crumpled to the base of the tree, where it stayed. Anders froze the other two wolves, allowing Mhairi and Oghren to shatter them with their blades, and it was over as quickly as it had begun.

They barely had time to catch their breath when the earth shuddered and the sound of cracking wood filled the air. The Dalish elf appeared on a nearby hill.

"Why are you still here?" she shouted, throwing her arms up in the air. "I told you to stay away from me! I warned you, this place is not for you."

Kallian shouted up at the mage, trying to keep her own anger at bay. "You _don't_ understand, the merchants aren't responsible for this, humans didn't kill your people or take your sister, it was…"

The woman let out a shriek. "I know a human crime when I see one, I have experienced more than enough of them. You will pay for spreading their lies!" She lifted her arms and began to shout out a spell in the Dalish tongue.

"Maker!" Anders gasped, barely able to cast an arcane shield around the group before two sylvan trees near them shook and came to life.

As the Wardens turned to fight the trees, Kallian saw the elven mage run up the hill toward the abandoned camp.

"We have to stop this madness," she shouted at the others.

"I'm not arguing with you, Commander," Anders shouted back. "But I'm a little busy here!"

He ran a few steps away to put some distance between himself and the fight, and turned back toward the nearest sylvan. Protecting himself with his shield, he began mumbling. The air around him began to stir and then, quite suddenly, a thick strand of lightning shot forth from his hand, larger than any he had ever conjured, striking the first sylvan and forking out to the second. Both trees exploded into a cloud of smoldering splinters and the forest was silent once again.

Kallian and the others were dumbfounded for a moment. Even Anders looked impressed.

"Maker's balls, Anders," Kallian exclaimed when she finally found her voice. "That was brilliant!"

"Umm, thank you. I…I wasn't sure that would work. I haven't actually had a chance to try it until now." He laughed nervously, in awe of, and startled by, the power he had unleashed.

She dusted herself off, noting the others were still staring at Anders in stunned silence. "Well, then. Ah…I guess you maybe need a safe place to practice your magic. You know, so you don't have to experiment on us. Out here. With real darkspawn and such."

They looked at each other for a moment.

"Yeah, that would be a good idea," Anders agreed, bobbing his head up and down.

"Right." Kallian turned to the others, clapping her hands together to get their attention. "Okay then, I saw the elf run back toward the Dalish camp. Let's move."

xXx

The mage was standing by the graves, her shoulders slumped in defeat. She laughed when she saw the Wardens approaching.

"You will never take me alive," she said, her breathing ragged.

"I just want to talk." Kallian stayed back, hands out where the mage could see them.

"Ha, _talk_," she sneered in response.

"Look, can we start over, try to be…well, _civil_ to one another? As civil as possible, considering the circumstances." She risked taking a few steps forward. "My name is Kallian Arainai, Warden Commander of the Ferelden Grey Wardens."

The mage relaxed slightly, something about Kallian's introduction catching her attention. Holding her head up high, she replied, "I am Velanna."

Kallian nodded. "Humans did not do this to you and your clan members, Velanna. It was the darkspawn."

"What? Do not be ridiculous, that is impossible. The darkspawn are mindless."

"Until recently, I believed that, Velanna, but it's no longer true. I have reason to believe that you and I are being toyed with. The darkspawn attacked your camp and made it look as though humans had done it. We found a witness who was able to tell us, before he died, what he had seen." She reached into her breastplate. "And I found this on one of the darkspawn."

Velanna fell silent, the haughtiness draining from her as she took the trinket and stared at it. "This is Seranni's, our mother gave it to her. She would part with this no more easily than her own life."

Kallian watched as the mage processed what she'd been told, casting her eyes on the graves, weapons, the Wardens and, finally, back on Kallian. "I wondered why someone would just discard the weapons. You're saying the darkspawn _planted_ them? That they killed my people and took my sister?"

"Yes."

"Why would they do this?" Velanna hissed.

Kallian shrugged, trying to mask her true fear that Velanna's sister had been captured to serve as a broodmother. "I don't know, but I intend to find out. Let us help you."

"You…you would help me find Seranni? Why?"

"No one deserves to suffer at the hands of darkspawn, Velanna."

"Great, another twitchy, magic sort. Just what we need," Oghren grumbled as he took a swig from his flask.

"Are we _really_ going to…" Anders began. Catching Kallian's expression, he pursed his lips and nodded.

"Do you know where the darkspawn dwell?" Velanna asked, clearly making an effort to ignore the others.

"Underground, in tunnels, usually."

"There is an abandoned mine nearby," Velanna pointed back down the hill to the north.

Kallian nodded. "That's what I was thinking. Shall we?"

After a moment's hesitation, Velanna nodded curtly.

"Right. These are the Ferelden Grey Wardens. Mhairi, Nathaniel, my second, our healer, Anders, and Oghren."

The others each nodded in turn, and there was a moment of awkward silence before Kallian herded the group toward the mine entrance.

"All right, let me…" Kallian was pulling her lock picks out of her braided hair when she looked up, stopping short. The door to the mine was slightly ajar.

"Wait a minute. That was closed when we first passed by. Right?"

Kallian felt a sense of apprehension. The other Wardens were looking at each other and nodding slowly. Indecision filled her as she recalled Olaf's words. _The dark ones are curious about you, too._ This was a trap; she knew it instinctively, but she couldn't see any way around actually going into the mine. They were Wardens, they had to investigate, root out the darkspawn, eradicate them. She peered into the woods around them, but couldn't see anything but the trees. There were definitely darkspawn ahead of and below their current position, however, and that was what they were here for. She took a deep breath and steeled herself against her own conflicting emotions.

"Okay, we're going in…"

Velanna pushed past the others. "Well then let's go," she snapped sharply, pushing the door wide open to reveal a large cavernous entrance leading to a wooden staircase that wound down into the mine below them.

"Slow down, Velanna," Kallian whispered as she and the Wardens followed her. "We need to proceed cautiously."

They gathered at the top of the stairs and peered down. The next level wasn't too far below them and the area was reasonably well lit with torches along the walls.

"Um…those aren't enchanted lanterns, are they?" Kallian asked. _Please say yes._

Anders shook his head. "Nuh uh." He was pale and looked to be sweating.

"Are you okay?" She reached out to put a hand on his arm, only to find him shaking slightly. _Oh shit_, she thought. _I do not like this at all._

He gulped and nodded. "Not really. Don't like small spaces much, is all."

_Why didn't I see this before?_ Kallian squeezed his arm and looked around at the others.

"Okay, so we're going to go in, look around, see what we can find, deal with it and get out. Keep an eye on each other and be wary."

Those very words would come back to haunt her mere moments later as she descended the stairs and walked across the stone floor toward a mining tunnel. The floor, which was covered with such a thick layer of dust that it appeared to be dirt, was actually paved with stones. Kallian realized this just a moment too late, as she reached the center of the cavern they crossed, and an intricate pattern of circles and squares beneath her began to glow an eerie green. That feeling of being watched washed over her again and with a start she felt the presence of a powerful darkspawn.

Her attention was drawn back up to the platform overhead and she thought her heart had stopped beating. Time seemed to come to a halt. The oddly shaped head; the human, almost _handsome_, face; woven leather pauldrons; breastplate that looked like a rib cage; long arms and fingers…It was all as she had seen it in her nightmares and it was real and staring down at her. Standing next to him was a tainted dwarven woman…wearing a_ Warden's_ armor, the griffon crest shining brightly in the torchlight. Terror gripped Kallian and she felt frozen, unable to speak or move. _What have I done?_

"Shhh…" the beast whispered as he waved a hand in the air.

Green mist swirled up around them and the world seemed to tip to one side. Kallian's vision blurred and as quickly as panic threatened to overtake her, the feeling slipped away, replaced by an overwhelming desire to rest, and everything went black.

* * *

**A/N:** Thanks to Bioware for use of some dialogue and their universe. Gratitude as always to my beta reader Mille Libri (happy vacay!), a shout out to Zevgirl and Zute for their support and friendship, and a special thank you to you, the readers, for reading, adding me to your alerts lists, and for reviewing/commenting. It really is great fun, and encouraging, hearing from you. Please feel free to comment; it's what keeps me going and makes this so much fun. Cheers!


	11. What a Charming Little Cave

**What a Charming Little Cave**

Kallian tried to sit up and discovered that she couldn't, and it was then that she realized she could only move her head and breathe. No other part of her body would respond to her commands. She remembered entering the mines with her Wardens and the elf, Velanna. _Stay calm, panic will do you no good. Stay calm._ Kallian's head lolled to the left and she thought she might vomit as horror settled into her very bones. The same creature that had put them to sleep and appeared in her nightmares stood there, looming over her, a calm, almost serene look upon his very human face as he stared down at her. For the first time in a long time, she felt the subtle stirrings of the Fade spirit within her and the fear that threatened to take control of her slid away.

"So, you are the Commander of the Grey Wardens," he said in a soothing voice. "Do not be frightened. Your injuries have been tended to. I apologize for what I must do. I do not wish to be your enemy, but now is not the time for this. _Rest_…"

Kallian felt a brief flash of anger before she succumbed to the spell.

xXx

"Yer gonna wanna give her some space. I hear she gave Alistair a black eye the first time Wynne put her out." Oghren's voice filtered through the fog in Kallian's mind.

"She punched the _king_? Why?" Mhairi sounded incredulous.

"Ah, the little pike twirler wasn't the king at the time, and it just sorta happened. She woke up fighting, hit him before she'd even opened her eyes. Look, she's already balling her fists up."

"Pike twirler?" Mhairi took one of Kallian's hands in her own, patting it reassuringly.

"He does this thing where he dances around with sticks for exercise. Weirdest thing I ever saw."

"Would you two please…Anders, she's waking. _Anders_, snap out of it! _Dammit_. Velanna, hand me that cup of water, please."

"Tcht. _Here_."

"Thank you, my lady."

"Stop calling me that."

"Shut up," Kallian groaned, finally making a concerted effort to open her eyes.

Nathaniel sat to her right, a cup of water in his hands; Mhairi was on her other side, her face lined with concern as she helped Kallian sit up. Anders paced back and forth nearby, muttering verses of the Chant of Light to himself; Oghren sat on the floor, leaning back against the wall; Velanna had moved to the other side of the cell, her arms folded across her chest.

"Wha…uh, thirsty." Kallian took the cup from Nathaniel and took a few tentative sips of water. Her stomach lurched and she waited a moment longer before drinking more water. "How long've…we been…here?"

"Several hours, at least. We don't know for certain," Mhairi responded.

Kallian looked down at her arms to find her left sleeve rolled up and a small scar at the crook of her elbow. She was wearing a plain dress, not her armor or her own leggings and tunic. She dropped the metal cup, hands flying to her bosom, and she stared down at herself as her hands roamed over the clothing she was wearing. Kallian looked at the others and saw they were all wearing strange clothing. The terror that filled her was only slightly calmed when her hands came to rest on her belly and she could feel that the bump that was her child was still there. Tears prickled the backs of her eyes and she struggled to maintain control. _What have I gotten us into? What has that thing done to us?_

"Commander?" Nathaniel reached out to put a hand on her arm, but she pulled away, backing herself up against the cell wall.

She began to shake, her chest heaving with short, shallow breaths. "This is my fault. I stepped on that glyph on the floor, and…and…Oh Maker, what has he _done_ to us? I'm so sorry," she gasped.

"Commander, calm yourself." Nathaniel's tone was stern.

"Andraste's tits, Nate, she's had a traumatic experience and she's got a child to be concerned about. Back off." Anders' voice drew her back out of her thoughts. He had stopped pacing and was crouched next to Nathaniel, fear and concern in his eyes.

Anders crept forward slowly, until he was close enough to take Kallian her by the arms to pull her to her feet. His face close to hers so she was forced to look him in the eye, he tried to speak in a soothing tone. "Hey, _hey_…No one else realized the glyph was there, it could have happened to any of us. And look, we're okay. That thing only took our blood. He's done _nothing_ else to you or your child, or _any_ of us. Right?" he raised his voice, looking over his shoulder at Velanna.

"The shem tells the truth, Commander." Velanna's shrill voice cut through the air. "I think they brought us here immediately after that…_creature_ first put us to sleep. I woke up in this," she waved a hand at the dress she wore, "and you were all here, in your armor. He came back for each of you, one after the other, putting me to sleep each time so I couldn't interfere." She was positively bristling with anger. "They would bring each of you back, dressed as you are, arm scarred, and take the next one away."

Anders ignored her insult. "He's taken everything of ours to gain the upper hand, reduce us to our most vulnerable state, _that's all_. Do you trust me?"

"You don't know what they do to…to…_women_," she whispered, and while he couldn't really fully comprehend what she was saying, Anders understood her concern all too well.

"Kallian, you are my arlessa and my commanding officer, and sometimes you can be scary for someone your size, but you are also my _sister_ and my _friend_, and I simply could not lie to you about something like that, I…" He shook his head. "I _wouldn't_. He only took your blood, nothing else. Physically, you're fine. Do you trust me?"

Kallian looked up at him for what felt like an eternity to her, trying to get control of herself. _Calm down, calm down, he's telling the truth, calm down. _She fought to keep her fears at bay until she could finally speak. "Yes."

Anders smiled and let go of her, taking a step back. Kallian smoothed her hands over her hair and straightened her clothes, taking several deep breaths.

"Okay?" he asked.

She had a sudden impulse to hug him and gave in to it, grabbing Anders and embracing him. After a moment of startled surprise, he wrapped his arms around her shoulders and hugged her back. He was shaking, too, and she remembered that he was afraid of confined spaces. _I am not alone, we need each other. _A range of emotions – fear, anger, disgust – flooded through her and it was all complicated by the fact that she felt somewhat guilty for being grateful that he and the others were with her. _This is what it is. You have to deal with it._

"Thank you, Anders." she said as she finally pulled back and rubbed the tears from her face. "Are _you_ okay?"

"Oh, I guess it helps to have something else to worry about." He laughed grimly.

"Ha. Glad I could help. Everyone else? You okay?"

They nodded and gathered around her. Kallian reached out to each of them, taking a measure of comfort in being able to _touch_ them, see that they were unharmed. Their strength bolstered her confidence. Feeling more like herself again, ready to face this latest ordeal, she smiled sheepishly and tried to lighten the mood.

"Um…do me a favor and don't tell anyone I lost it, okay? Can't have the Warden Commander looking weak, right?"

"Sparklefingers there was on his knees praying and _crying_ when I woke up," Oghren said with a gruff laugh. "And I thought I was going to piss these fruity, nug-humper pants when I thought that maybe those bastards had touched Little Oghren."

There was an awkward silence and then the Wardens began laughing. Velanna cleared her throat.

"May I remind you…" The sound of metal scraping on stone caught everyone's attention and Velanna lunged forward, gripping the bars of their cell, as an elven woman appeared through a doorway along the wall opposite their cell. "Seranni! Seranni, what have they done to you?"

The young woman cast a furtive glance over her shoulder and turned back to them. "They haven't done anything. I'm fine, Velanna. It isn't me he wants. I have to get you out before something bad happens." She fumbled with something in a small pouch tied to her belt. "I don't want anyone else to get hurt."

"All right, let me out of here and I'll take you home," Velanna tried reasoning with her sister.

Seranni ignored Velanna's pleas and spoke directly to Kallian. "The darkspawn have your things. If you're careful and clever, you can get it all back."

"Please, tell me what is going on here. You must know _something_." Kallian pleaded, standing beside Velanna. Seranni was tainted, but there was something different about her. Kallian couldn't quite tell how long she'd been tainted, or how soon she might succumb to it, unlike the militiaman they had met earlier in the day. _Day? Night? I have no idea._

"They're coming, you _have_ to go!" Seranni insisted, grabbing at Kallian to get her attention. "Find a way out of the mines, please!" She pressed a key into Kallian's hand and ran out of sight.

Velanna uttered a choked cry. "No, I can't just leave you here! Seranni, wait! Aaagh!"

Kallian ran to the door of their cell and began trying to open it. It took some effort, but after a few minutes she was able to reach the lock and work the key. The door swung open with a loud creak and they stepped out into a larger room with several prison cells.

Three darkspawn shuffled through the doorway where Seranni had first appeared, and roared when they saw their prisoners had escaped. Anger and instinct kicked in, overriding any fear she was feeling. Rushing the genlock in the lead, Kallian drove her fist up into his nose. Pulling her skirt up to her thighs, she kicked him between the legs and then punched him again and again. The other Wardens followed suit, engaging in an all-out fist fight. Between punches, Anders and Velanna cast spells to slow down and incapacitate the darkspawn. The brawl barely lasted ten minutes, but when the last of the beasts fell, Kallian doubled over, gasping for breath.

"Son of a…bitch, I think I…I wear too much…enchanted stuff."

"We've all suffered blood loss," Anders piped up, sounding somewhat cheerful, all things considered.

Oghren chuckled. "I think you really put all you had in you into that fight. His own mother wouldn't recognize him." He kicked at the genlock lying at her feet.

Looking at her sore and bloodied hands, Kallian grimaced. "Eeew. The sooner we find our weapons and armor, the better."

Feeling the part of a commander once again, she began issuing orders when she regained her breath and Anders had seen to their wounds. "Search the area for anything that might help us get out of here, weapons, armor, potions, anything."

The darkspawn they had just defeated had weapons Anders and Kallian could use, armor for the three men, and a key, which Anders pocketed. Their search expanded to the adjoining cells, where they found the corpse of a recently deceased dwarf. He had a long sword with him and Oghren was quick to grab it. "Ancestors guide you, my friend."

"Hey," Anders called out from a doorway at the far end of the room, waving the key in the air. "I think this is maybe where that thing works. Looks like a lab…or a prison or…"

Kallian followed him into the room and felt a shiver run down her spine. A green mist billowed up along the back wall of the lab, behind a raised dais with a stone table at its center. Kallian approached it warily and found herself peering down into a pit below them. She could barely make out a room and a large chest before she began to feel dizzy.

"Careful, Commander," Nathaniel warned as he reached out to grip her elbow.

Kallian stepped back and shook her head. "Thank you. Let's see if there's anything here to give us an idea what they're up to."

The group split up and began searching the room. Nothing was left unexamined. Kallian and Anders found themselves drawn to the piles of books scattered about the tables. Anders sucked in his breath as he read one passage.

"Kallian, come here," he hissed, trying not to draw any one else's attention. When she was at his side, he showed her what he held in his hands. "It's that thing's _journal_."

Her face twisted into a frown as she took the book from him and read the passage to herself.

"_The Seeker collected two elves, male and female. The rest died defending their camp. Unfortunate, but a small price to pay. The male has since dashed his head on the wall. Odd. Don't all living beings strive for survival?_

_The Seeker confessed that he did more than simply collect the elves. He found the elves and humans at odds, then exacerbated the conflict by making the humans look responsible for the two elves' disappearances. He said he wanted to see how the elf leader would react. Odd again._

_The female elf has developed a…bond of sorts with her guard. Many of the other disciples seem drawn to her as well. The Seeker says her name is Seranni. Perhaps I should speak to her. Maybe she will understand."_

"Maker's blood…"

"What have you found?" Velanna was at her side, peering over her shoulder. "Is that my sister's name?"

Unable to hide the truth from her, Kallian handed her the journal. After a moment, anguish filled the elven mage's eyes.

"I am sorry, Velanna."

Velanna thrust the journal back to Kallian, who tucked it under her arm. "Keep your pity, I have no need of it."

"Are we keeping her?" Anders asked beneath his breath as the mage stalked off.

Kallian sighed and shrugged. "She's been through a traumatic experience, too, Anders, and has lost much. I can forgive her some of the rudeness."

He nodded. "Point taken."

"Hey, look at this. _'Phylacteries: A History Written in Blood.'_ You'd probably get more out of this than I would. Take it." She tossed the book to him and kept sifting through the materials on the table in front of her.

"Thanks, this is great," Anders mumbled as he flipped through the book. "Maybe I can figure out a way to find mine and finally be free of it." When Kallian didn't respond, he looked up to find her staring at a piece of parchment, her hand trembling slightly.

"Kallian?" She waved him over and he went to her side, reading over her shoulder.

_-What happens if the Old Gods perish? Does the song die with them?_

_-The blood is the key. The blood is always the key._

_-The female elf is accommodating, allowing me to take her blood for my work. Perhaps she thinks I'll release her if she cooperates._

_-My disciples report that another elf is rampaging through the woods, killing humans. Revenge for what we did to her kind, only she hasn't seen through the Seeker's ruse. We'll keep this from Seranni. If she is upset, she may stop cooperating._

_-Perhaps I should have killed it while it slept._

The notes were written in the same handwriting as the journal.

"Okay, this is getting more than a little frightening," Anders mumbled. "He's experimenting on us, elves, dwarves maybe, his disciples have been toying with us just to see what we'll do, and what's this about the old gods?"

Kallian pointed to the paper. "The old gods, their song…that's how the Blights start. Darkspawn, drawn to an old god by its song, awaken it, infect it with the taint, and it rises as an archdemon. Its will guides the darkspawn, they surge to the surface as a horde, and you have a blight." She turned and leaned against the table, the others drawing closer to listen.

"The stories tell us that there are seven old gods, who tried to turn mortals from the Maker. The Maker imprisoned them underground, but their minds were free to roam the Fade and they were able to contact Magisters, teach them to use magic to free the old gods. When these Magisters entered the Golden City to usurp the Maker, they caused the First Blight, turned the Golden City into the Black City and became the first darkspawn. These old gods continue to call to the darkspawn constantly.

"It has always been said that the darkspawn were mindless, their response to the songs of the old gods was purely instinctual, and they weren't aware of what they were doing. That may still be the case, but these notes suggests to me that this creature is aware of the song, and that he wants to…stop it? _'Perhaps I should have killed it while it slept.'_" she sucked in her breath. "You don't suppose he woke up this last god, Urthemiel, do you?"

The others considered the idea for a moment before Nathaniel spoke. "If he does want to stop the song, it makes sense he would have to find and kill the gods, and so it follows he might have inadvertently woken this last one."

"'_The blood is the key. The blood is always the key.'_" Kallian slowly rolled the parchment and began tapping it with her fingers.

"What is it, Commander?" Mhairi asked.

"Mmm, I don't know. Just thinking. It's disturbing to realize that maybe these creatures share the same curiosity and desire to explore and learn that we have. Maker's breath, the one who's keeping us here even writes a _journal_. I hate to say it, but what he's done to me seems no worse than what I was required to do for my Joining. In fact, less so as he didn't track me down and kill me to take my blood. I suppose for that I should be grateful." She made a face and shook her head, motioning for them to leave.

They left the lab and prison and found themselves at the top of a set of stairs that was blocked by the roots of trees from above and the rubble they'd pushed into the building. A group of darkspawn was at the base of the stairs, but hadn't noticed them yet. Kallian waved for everyone to crouch down out of sight while she eyed a nearby ballista. It happened to be pointed at a very large and old looking statue near the darkspawn. She put her hand on Nathaniel's leg and leaned in to whisper in his ear.

"I'm going to fire that. Get your bow ready to pick off any who survive."

He nodded and began to slowly pull his bow and arrows while she crawled to the ballista. When she was ready, she moved quickly, leaping up and drawing the mechanism back, letting the bolt fly a second later. It hit the statue and shattered it, sending large chunks of stone raining down on darkspawn around it. Only one remained standing and Nathaniel was able to kill it immediately.

They stood and found a tunnel to their left that ran down to the lower level, pausing to gather any armor and weapons they could use from the darkspawn they'd just killed. Kallian stood up suddenly, looking over her shoulder.

"Kallian?" Anders reached out to put a hand on her arm. "You okay?"

She had her eyes closed as she focused on the pull of the taint within her veins. "There's another Warden here."

"Kristoff?" Oghren asked, pulling on a pair of boots.

"No, not Kristoff, another." A sense of urgency was building in her. The man was injured, he needed help. Without a word to the others, she gathered up the items she was carrying and carried on.

As they turned a corner, a hurlock shuffled into view and Oghren let out a bellow. "Hey, that…_thing_ has my things! He's had his sallow, clammy hands all over my doodads, touching my junk. _No one touches Oghren's junk and lives!_"

He rushed forward and nearly ripped the beast's head off before it even had a chance to pull Oghren's battle axe off its back. Muttering a string of curses, the likes of which Kallian had never heard, Oghren began the process of getting his own things off the darkspawn and back onto his own body. When he was finally done, he looked at the others.

"Well, what are ya waitin' for? We gotta get yer junk back."

Nathaniel clapped a hand on the dwarf's shoulder. "I couldn't have said it better myself."

xXx

The buzz of a fellow Warden's tainted blood grew stronger until it finally led them to a small antechamber where a man lay on the floor, his legs at an odd angle to his body. Judging from the blood on the floor around him, and what she could see of his legs through the gashes in his armor, he was horribly injured and in dire need of healing. A quick look at Anders, only to find him shaking his head ever so slightly, dashed her hopes that they could do anything for the man. She knelt by his side and he stirred. Even in his state, recognition dawned almost immediately.

"You're the Warden Commander," he rasped. "I would not have expected to meet you here. Did those bastards get you, too?"

"Yeah, but it won't happen again. What's your name, Warden?" Kallian took his hand in hers. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Anders' hands glowing blue as he cast a spell to relieve the man's pain. His features relaxed as the spell took effect.

"Keenan. I was to help rebuild the Ferelden Wardens. We hadn't been at Vigil's Keep for long when the darkspawn came. I think I'm the only one left. The others are dead…or worse."

"Kristoff yet lives, but he is out in the field. What are the darkspawn doing, do you know?" _Surely this man has other things on his mind, making peace with the Maker, a final thought for his loved ones, a lament or regret, and here I am grilling him for information._ Guilt lanced through her even as she told herself she _had_ to know whatever he knew.

"I do not. The emissary who leads them is more cunning than any other darkspawn I have ever seen. He's fascinated with the Wardens, has that dwarven Warden, Utha, with him constantly. Listen, there is a darkspawn here with a huge maul. He crushed my legs and took my wedding ring. Please, Commander, slay him and take my ring to my wife, Needa, in Amaranthine. Tell her I died trying to make this world a better place."

"I swear to you it will be done, Keenan." Her voice caught in her throat. He looked young, perhaps in his late twenties, and he was married. _How many of these men were married, had children?_

"Thank you, Commander. May the Maker turn his gaze upon you." Keenan took a few more ragged breaths, and then he was gone.

Kallian felt his life slip away, saw his eyes go dead, and choked back a sob. _Again we were too late, too late._ She held his hand a moment longer before folding his arms over his chest and brushing her fingers over his eyelids to close them. Reaching to his neck, she took the Warden's Oath amulet that hung there and secured it around her own neck. "May the Maker watch over you, Brother."

She stood and straightened the clothing she wore, taking a few breaths to center herself again. "Okay, let's go."

"'He wanted to make the world a better place'?" Velanna asked sharply. "What an insipid line. Is that supposed to make her feel better about his death?"

"_Hey_," Kallian snapped as she spun around to face the mage, gripping her upper arm. "Maybe you could use your _internal_ voice, Velanna, and show some respect. Just as you have suffered, so have I, and while our losses are different, I will _not_ allow you mock mine." She released the elf with a little shove and spun on her heels to leave.

Velanna responded by folding her arms across her chest and huffing slightly.

"Let's get out of here," Kallian snarled as she stalked out of the chamber.

xXx

The Wardens and their elven companion ran through the maze of tunnels and rooms that formed the mines, battling more of the strange darkspawn's experimental subjects, some recognizable as former Grey Wardens, and his disciples. Quickly enough, they found all of their armor, weapons and accessories. Kallian barely had time to wonder where their backpacks and potions were, when they stumbled upon a nest of dragonlings and a drake. Apparently the darkspawn were breeding dragons.

"Andraste's frilly knickers!" Anders exclaimed as he encased the party members in an arcane shield and summoned a blizzard.

Nathaniel slipped into the shadows. He reappeared barely a moment later atop a section of scaffolding and began targeting the dragonlings with a shower of frost-enchanted arrows. Oghren and Mhairi slashed a path through the group of beasts with their heavy blades, dismembering the creatures and scattering their body parts across the cavern. Velanna stood back with Anders, her face grim with intense concentration, as she called upon tree roots to shoot up through the stone floors at strategic moments, impaling the creatures with deadly accuracy. Kallian danced and tumbled around the drake, stabbing and slicing at every vulnerable point she could find until it was weak and too injured to make any attempt to fly away. Running around it and up its back, she grabbed the drake by its boney crown and pulled its head back, drawing her blade across its leathery throat. A wide spray of blood covered the ground before them as the drake collapsed to the ground. She tumbled off and jumped up into a defensive stance, panting heavily, eyes searching for more enemies, but it was over. She doubled over and put her hands on her knees.

_Maker, grant me the strength to get out of here and back to Zevran alive and in one piece. _

"Is everyone alive?" Anders asked weakly. "Ouch."

Kallian turned to see Velanna propping Anders up against a wall, a glowing hand pressed to his forearm. "Don't be such a baby, mage, it is barely a flesh wound."

"My robes," he pouted in response, picking at the rip in his sleeve. "Hey, why'd you do _that_?" he whined as Velanna wiped her hand on his other sleeve.

"You bled on me, what was I supposed to do?"

Kallian looked at the scene around her – blood, guts and gore everywhere, Velanna and the Wardens standing around taking what they needed from the health, lyrium and stamina draughts they had found or attending to their injuries – and she didn't know whether she should laugh or cry. Part of her felt a deepening despair that they would never find their way out of here and she would never see Zevran again, while another part of her was becoming increasingly angry about the whole situation and willing to rip to the entire place apart in order to find and kill every last darkspawn there. Even this disturbed her as she thought back to the documents she now had tucked in her breastplate, the journal and research notes. This new perspective on the darkspawn was confusing, hard to piece into the information she already had about them. Realizing that the others were now looking to her for further instruction, she decided to split the difference of her indecision. They would get out and kill everything that stood in their way. If they could come back to this location for mining purposes, they would provide a complement of guards to clear out the passages before any work began.

Nodding brusquely to the others, she led them back into the tunnels.

xXx

They had no idea how much time had passed or how many more drakes and dragonlings they fought before they finally faced off against the breeder himself, a large genlock, and they were beginning to tire. They were only able to keep going due to their good luck finding stamina draughts and lyrium potions as they went.

When they finally ran into the darkspawn who had ultimately killed Keenan, Kallian wasted no time calling upon the skills she had acquired as a result of Avernus' potion. With her blades tainted, she moved with lightning fast speed to flank the beast as the others kept his attention focused forward. The perfect moment came several minutes into the fight, when the darkspawn lifted his blade above his head to bring it back down with a chop. She was able to shove her blades into the weaker points beneath in the armpits of his armor before he had a chance to bring the maul back down on someone's head. With the darkspawn's arms rendered useless, the great maul fell to the ground, followed by the darkspawn itself.

"That is for Keenan!" Kallian roared as she grabbed the creature's head and wrenched it to one side, breaking its neck.

"Like I said," Anders broke the silence that followed with his usual chipper tone. "Kind of scary for someone her size."

Oghren nodded with something akin to pride shining in his eyes. "Aye, if she were a warrior, she would make a great berserker."

Kallian took a moment to tuck stray strands of hair into her braid and wipe blood from her gloves before suggesting that Oghren take the maul, and then she was moving again.

xXx

The next chamber they found appeared to be a bedroom, complete with a small desk, lamp and stationery set. Kallian picked up a letter and read it aloud.

_Utha, I know this has tested your patience. You first gave your blood years ago to further our common dream. __I know at times it seems we're going nowhere. Trust me, Utha, I echo your frustration.__Vigil's Keep__was a setback, but minor. I intend to keep my promise to you._

_Perhaps you should venture above ground. The greenery and fresh air would do your spirit good._

_Architect_

"Utha is the dwarven Warden and this…_Architect_ is the thing that captured us," Kallian mumbled, more to herself than anyone else. _It writes her letters, shares a dream with her, sympathizes, and tells her to get some fresh air?_ "This is so…weird. I just…I can't…it's weird." she finished lamely, shaking her head as she folded the letter and slipped it into her breast plate.

She was still shaking her head when they ran into a Qunari merchant standing at the top of a wide staircase leading to a grand doorway. Her anxiety about getting out was stalled by curiosity and a need for potions and packs.

"Who are you?" Kallian asked the Qunari.

"I am Armass. You are not supposed to be here," he replied, reminding her very much of Sten.

"Neither are you?" She hadn't meant for it to sound like a question, but she was completely surprised to find a merchant standing in a darkspawn lair looking for all the world to be completely free of the taint and in good health. "And what do you mean by that?"

She could hear Nathaniel off to her left, opening a chest. "Our packs and potions!"

Anders stayed by her side while the others collected their things.

"You are not one of them; you were brought here. They do not allow those they bring here to wander about freely. If they find you they will kill you."

For a moment, Kallian felt a wave of nostalgia, reminded as she was of Sten, the Qunari who had travelled with her during the Blight. She wondered, fleetingly, where he was, but let the thought go.

"Erm…not if I kill them first."

"Then go, unless you wish to trade. Your gold is as good as theirs."

"Why would the Qunari work with the darkspawn?"

"The Qun is a lie. I am Tal Vashoth, an outcast. My life is my own. I do not help the darkspawn, I help myself."

"Will you…trade at a discount?"

He sighed, and she thought back to all the times her persistent questions had gotten such a reaction from Sten.

"Very well. You are in a bit of trouble and I am not heartless."

Kallian found she had to bite down on her tongue to prevent herself from laughing. This was starting to get quite strange.

"But if you truly wish my help, I would suggest that you escape this place as soon as you can," Armass continued as he opened the large trunk beside him.

Kallian snorted as she picked through his wares for various potions, injury kits and arrows for Nathaniel. After asking the others if they had anything to sell, she pulled numerous items out of her pack and gave them to Armass. The Qun counted out their money and gave them change, his eyes constantly roaming the stairs behind them.

"Believe me, getting out of here is our primary goal at this point." Pocketing her coin, Kallian smiled up at him. "Thank you, Armass."

She turned to leave, stopped and looked back at him. "Armass?"

"You are still here."

"Um…yes. Listen, would you consider trading at Vigil's Keep?" _Kallian the Opportunist, they'll call me,_ she thought with a slight giggle.

"Vigil's Keep? That is the Grey Warden fortress near Amaranthine. Yes, I know it." Armass was clearly giving the idea consideration. He looked around the dark tunnel he was in and finally settled his gaze upon Kallian, nodding.

"Yes. If there is coin to be had, Armass will be there. We will meet again…if you survive this place." With that, he turned away and began to secure the contents of his trunk.

Anders laughed. "You are so lucky."

"Pfft. We aren't out of here yet, Anders." She paused to listen at the door and then pulled it open only to find herself looking down a hallway to another set of doors. She looked back at Armass, who nodded and she shrugged. "Okay, away we go."

The second set of doors opened into yet another large cavern and the party cautiously stepped forward. Kallian sucked in her breath as she felt the pull of their captor's tainted blood. She came to an abrupt stop and turned to look up at one of several balconies that looked down into the cavern. The Architect stood there looking down at her, with Utha and Seranni at his side. He turned to Seranni, who dipped her head to him and then he turned to look at a balcony across from theirs. Not one but two dragons sat there and at some subtle command of his they pushed off and landed on the floor below, staring down the Wardens.

"Andraste's flaming sword, what the…"

"A little less talking and a whole lot more killing, Sparklefingers!" Oghren bellowed as he be bolted down the length of the room to confront one of the dragons.

The flurry of battle that followed was hard and furious, every single one of them putting everything they had left in them into the fight. The battle was long, loud and bloody, vines and branches crashing through the floors and walls, battle cries and the roar of the dragons echoing off the walls, streams of orange fire streaking across the room, until suddenly all they could hear was themselves, the defeated dragons lying dead before them. Foliage lay everywhere and the blizzard Anders had called up to help keep burns to a minimum died down, leaving the room covered in a light dusting of snow.

Kallian spun around and looked up to the balcony where they had last seen the Architect and the others. Utha shook her head and turned to walk into the tunnel behind them. The Architect looked down at Kallian for a while before turning to guide Seranni off the balcony. When he reached the mouth of the tunnel, he turned and summoned a spell that caused a violent tremor, collapsing the entrance. Dust and small bits of debris rained down on them.

Velanna shrieked, turning to Kallian. "No, NO! Why is she with that monster? We must get to her!"

Kallian gripped her by the shoulders and looked her in the eye. "We will try to find another way, Velanna."

Oghren shook dust from his head. "They're darkspawn. They'll head underground to the Deep Roads, they always do."

Velanna's eyes gleamed with newfound hope. "The home of the children of the stone. Yes…They say Wardens can sense the darkspawn, even deep beneath the ground. I would join the Grey Wardens. Give me the ability to hunt down these monsters in the deep!"

Kallian had decided that she would be honest about the danger of undergoing the Joining. "The Joining could kill you."

Velanna laughed. "I do not fear death. I will pledge my service to you in exchange for the powers your order can grant. What say you?"

Kallian sighed, unable to refuse in spite of the nagging feeling that she might regret accepting this harsh woman's offer. "Very well then. Welcome to the Grey Wardens, recruit."

"Ma serannas. Shall we go then? I have had enough of this place."

xXx

When they finally staggered out of the mines, Kallian judged it to be late afternoon by the relation of the sun to the horizon. It was cloudy and threatening rain, and she groaned.

"Dammit, I want get as far away from here as possible and we're losing light. Anders, can you cast a haste spell on us?" Anders nodded, flexing his fingers.

Nathaniel checked their maps. "I think we can reach this point here," he tapped a spot along the path leading out of the woods, "before too much longer. There are many small caves and ledges in that area that would provide protection from the elements."

"Okay then, are we are all ready? Any reason to stay? No? Good, good. Whenever you're ready, Anders."

Blue light surrounded them all and the increased energy with which they had been endowed spurred them on at an alarming pace, away from the mines and toward the Pilgrim's Path. The further away they got, the better Kallian felt, but churning beneath the relief were unsatisfied curiosities about this Architect and his plans, anger and fear. _What comes next?_

* * *

**A/N:** Deep gratitude goes out my fabulous beta, Mille Libri, who turned this around in mere hours – mwah! I hope I haven't left any errors behind in my edits...To Zevgirl and Zute, cheers! To my readers and reviewers, thank you very much. I love hearing from you all, so please do feel free to leave a comment/review, or to send me a PM. Cheers, Biff


	12. What We Do Isn't Pretty

**What We do Isn't Pretty**

Kallian poked at the fire, added a few more pieces of wood and settled against the wall of the small cave where they were camped. It wasn't her turn to take watch, Anders was out there somewhere, but she couldn't sleep. When she closed her eyes, she could see the Architect's face, or Utha's, Seranni, Olaf, Keenan…and on it went. She contemplated what they had discovered. Feeling, thinking, caring darkspawn, it boggled her mind. Darkspawn who were driven to cruelty not by instinct, but by a desire to _see what would happen_ sent chills down her spine. It was overwhelming and she felt entirely out of her league. It had been easy during the Blight. Track them down and kill them. _What am I supposed to do now, invite them over for a pint and a chat, negotiate the terms of an agreement?_ Advice would be days coming if she wrote to the Anderfels and she certainly couldn't expect Alistair to help; he had a kingdom to run and was no more experienced than she was in such matters. All the same, she would have to report her latest findings to both Alistair and First Warden Ronan and hope for some guidance.

She couldn't help thinking that on some level she had failed to protect those who depended upon her, her Wardens, the people of the arling. She was no further along in her investigation into what was happening here and had, in fact, uncovered more mysteries than answers. She had led her team into a trap and gotten them all kidnapped by this strange darkspawn, the Architect. It didn't help that Kallian still had lingering fears about whatever experiments he might have conducted on them. She trusted Anders, but he had been unconscious, too, so how could he _really_ know? When her mind wandered in that direction, her throat closed up and her eyes filled with tears. She was reminded of the way she had reacted to the situation when she awoke, and felt embarrassment and shame for falling apart as she had.

She pulled her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on them, pulling her cloak around her body as she hugged her legs. While she did so, she realized she wouldn't be able to do it much longer before her growing child made sitting this way impossible. The thought provided momentary comfort before fear and anger both welled up inside her at the realization that she had put her child at risk. Kallian desperately wanted to stop thinking about all of this, but she couldn't. She wished she were back at the keep, in Zevran's arms, but it would be hours yet before they could even leave and, not for the first time, she wanted to cry. Tears spilled down her cheeks and she pressed a fist to her mouth to stop herself from sobbing.

The crunch of fallen leaves and a snapped twig betrayed Anders' return to the cave. She sat up and steadied her breathing as she brushed the tears from her face. He drew closer and smiled, sitting down near her.

"Can't sleep, Commander?"

Kallian shook her head.

"Thinking too much?"

She shrugged.

"You've been pretty quiet since we left the woods. How are you feeling?"

"I…I don't know. I don't know what to think or what to feel…" She cleared her throat, trying to hide the tightness that threatened to steal her voice.

He reached out to put a hand on her arm. "We've all been through a pretty stressful ordeal and may not have completely reacted to it yet. You need to talk about this, sort it out, we all do, you know? Don't retreat into that pretty head of yours and get all tied up in knots. It'll backfire on you. I'm here if you need me, a friendly ear."

Kallian offered him a weak smile. Duncan had said similar things when he first took her from the alienage so long ago. "I just want to get home. We don't even know what day it is or how long we've been gone." That was just one more thing about this entire mission that bothered her.

Anders squeezed her arm and let go, running his fingers through his hair. "I think we've maybe lost a day. The Architect is clearly working on something and I don't see him wasting too much time getting on with it. I don't know if any of us would have been awake long enough to determine if he even sleeps, or for how long, so…probably a day, maybe a day and a half?"

Kallian decided to accept that logic and finally allowed herself to relax a little. "Thanks. I feel…I…I'm disappointed with the way I reacted earlier," she admitted.

"What? Oh no, don't do that to yourself. Sure, you had a moment there, but trust me, we all did when we first woke up. Well, Velanna was all but spitting wooden pegs angry from the start, but she's got a bit of a chip on her shoulder as it is, so that's hardly surprising, is it?" He realized he was babbling. "My point is, we each had our_ moment_. You rose to the occasion like you have done from the moment I met you. Like you always do, from what I hear. Don't be _disappointed _with yourself."

Anders cleared his throat. "Look, speaking as a healer, senior mage, and your friend, someone who is concerned about you…"

She laughed a little then. "If you have something to say, Anders, you can say it. You don't need to wrap it up in a pretty package."

"Well, I think you take on too much responsibility for…_everything_, really. We're obviously going to be getting into some pretty dangerous situations, but we've all taken an oath to do that. Don't carry around some misplaced burden of guilt for what has happened to us, or what might. Look at what we're dealing with here. What we do isn't pretty. All we can do is give it our best and hope it works out. Right?"

Kallian knew he was right, knew she had to talk about the thoughts that were running through her mind, and she wanted to. It had to be better than turning these matters over and over in silence and getting nowhere. In spite of their rocky start and the way they could get on each others' nerves, Anders was easy to talk to. She turned to look at Anders.

"I blame it on my mother." She said it with a light laugh, clearly not meaning it in a negative way, and he smiled in response.

"Your _mother_?" He hadn't quite expected that.

She leaned forward to hug one knee, a sad smile on her face. "Mmm. She never accepted…her _place_, as the guards used to put it. A trouble maker, a…_shit disturber_, they called her. She was a rogue, and she trained me, even though Papae feared it would bring us trouble. I suppose it did, in the end. It's how I wound up here, really. I remember she was always taking care of people, helping others, and she was so brave. Mamae never seemed to be afraid of anything." Kallian paused, staring into the fire.

"She died when I was ten, trying to save a girl, a child barely older than I was, from being dragged off by a drunken guard. The guard took the girl and ran my mother through, leaving her there to die. That was the first time I'd ever seen her look afraid of anything." She blinked a few tears away.

"I'm sorry, Kallian." His own mother had been alive when he'd been taken by the templars at twelve, left with nothing more than a backhand to the cheek and the _threat_ of death when she tried to stop them. He had no idea if she was alive. Thirteen years later and he could still see her bruised and tear-stained face watching them take him away. It struck him now that he hadn't seen her look really afraid before that day, in spite of his magic and the hardships they'd suffered.

Kallian nodded, a wistful smile on her face. "Thank you. I wonder if she _was_ afraid and just hid it well, or I was too much of a child to see it. I wanted so much to be like her and the heroes you read about in stories, courageous, a champion for justice." She held a fist up in the air and mimed waving a flag around in a mock display of victory. "For a while I _thought_ I was, but now…well, I sometimes wish I could talk to her. I don't feel so brave lately."

He snorted at that. "I'm sorry, but really? You weigh what, maybe seven stone fully armored and you're about five feet tall? Have you ever _seen_ yourself fighting darkspawn?"

It was her turn to snort at his statement. She was hardly that tiny. "Um…no, I can't say that I have."

"Well, I'll draw you a picture sometime. You certainly _look_ brave enough," he chuckled.

Anders stretched his neck and shoulders and leaned back against the cave wall, watching Kallian out of the corner of his eye. She had nestled into a curve of the wall beside him and looked to be relaxing. They had a few hours before dawn and she needed to sleep.

Keeping his voice low and as soothing as possible, he spoke. "Maybe when you're a parent, you develop this ability to _act_ like it's all under control, a survival tactic so your children won't worry. There inevitably comes a time when that façade slips away, though, and we realize our parents are just human…or elven, as the case may be. Don't you think?"

"Mmmhmm," she mumbled, nodding her head slowly as her eye lids drooped.

He took off the knitted scarf he was wearing and began folding it up. "Well, I, for one, think it's more inspiring to know the hero is afraid and not always so certain things will work out. Makes it easier for someone like me to try to be heroic, you know?" His question was met with silence and he turned to look at Kallian. "Commander?"

Kallian's eyes had closed and her head was tipping back slowly. Anders shuffled closer to her and slipped his scarf behind her head just before it made contact with the cave wall. He pulled her blanket up around her shoulders and tucked her in. Casting a spell to put her into a deep sleep, he began to make himself some tea.

xXx

_The stench of rot and decay and waste filled the dark cavern, turning her stomach. The broodmother was a hideous monstrosity of deformed, mottled flesh that spread out across the floor and towered above her, larger than the one she'd seen in Orzammar, its multiple rows of breasts heaving and swaying with its movements. Arms that were far too small to reach a vast majority of its body or do anything at all grabbed at the air as its swollen face twisted with rage. Tentacles beat at the walls and floor of the cavern, making it difficult to see where the next attack would come from. _

_Kallian held her ground, bow and arrow in hand, firing shot after shot at the thing, and still it stood. Her companions were nowhere to be seen and she knew she couldn't last much longer. She was exhausted and running out of arrows. The earth shook beneath her and chunks of stone and dirt exploded into the air as a tentacle shot up through the ground, sending her flying backwards. She landed with a sickening thud, momentarily stunned, stars dancing before her eyes. Before she could clear her head and roll away, one of the broodmother's tentacles grabbed her ankle and hauled her up off the floor, dangling her over a pit of darkspawn. _

"_This one breeds," it shrieked as it let go of her and then Kallian was falling toward the darkspawn. Hands grabbed at her, tearing at her armor -_

"Maker, _NO_!" she screamed, sitting up, arms striking out.

"Ooof! Ouch!" Anders groaned. "Calm down, calm down."

Kallian opened her eyes and saw him sitting next to her, one hand on her shoulder, another covering his left eye.

"I'm so sorry," she panted, her hand going to her throat to clutch at the pendant Zevran had given her for Satinalia. Her heart ached to be with him, but the keep was hours away. She was suddenly quite anxious to get on the road. The interior of this cave looked too much like the one from her nightmare and she wanted to be gone.

Anders patted her shoulder. "It's okay. Maker, I hope for Zevran's sake you don't wake up like that often." He healed his eye and blinked at her. "I'm okay, are you okay?"

"Yeah…yeah." He raised an eyebrow at her. "Uh…no I'm not." She shook her head, trying to rid her mind of the horrifying images of her dream. "I just…I need fresh air." She quickly extracted herself from her blanket, pulled her cape around her body, and walked several paces out of the cave.

The sky was clear and the sun was just breaking the horizon. It was cold, but the forest around them was beautiful, glittering wherever the sunlight caught dew in its beams. Kallian tried to enjoy the view as she took several deep breaths to calm herself. She could hear the others stirring, mumbling, Anders telling them it was fine. They were moving their packs and bedrolls, getting a meal prepared. _It's just been another night at camp_, she reminded herself. _We will be on the road soon._

When she finally turned around, everyone, save Velanna, was seated around the fire eating, their back packs nearby. Even her own things were ready, her bedroll secured to her pack. Velanna had withdrawn from the group, much as Morrigan had done during the blight, and was perched on a boulder along the opposite wall of the cave. Anders waved Kallian over and patted the ground next to him.

"Come on, have a nosh and some tea. We'll be on our way and home again before you know it."

Everyone greeted her as she sat down, as though nothing was amiss, and Mhairi handed her a large chunk of bread with some smoked fish and salt pork before turning back to her conversation with Nathaniel. Kallian stared down at the food in her hands, wondering if she really felt like eating and nearly laughed out loud. _When have I _not_ felt like eating since becoming a Warden?_

Anders gave Kallian a reassuring smile and nudged her shoulder. "Eat up and we'll get out of here. Healers' orders, all right?"

"All right," she replied, her lips pulling into a small smile. She could wear a brave face for a few hours.

xXx

9 Firstfall, 9:30

Zevran stretched and dropped the washcloth into the bucket at his feet, looking around the tower room he had chosen to be his workspace. He'd started setting up the room almost as soon as Kallian and her Wardens had left, and after three days of cleaning and moving furniture in, he was satisfied with the results. It was now equipped with a small writing desk and chair, a second table for mixing poisons, a cabinet where he could store supplies and finished poisons, racks for drying ingredients, and a washbasin, and everything was neatly organized. The nook by the fireplace was stocked with wood, a small broom and dustbin, a kettle and pot. Several barrels had been placed around the roof, where they were already collecting rain water, and Yuriah had promised to deliver, by evening, all the equipment Zevran would need to finish repurposing the room. Tomorrow Alex would be building planter boxes on the top of the tower, dirt would be brought up over the winter and in the spring he could begin planting.

He climbed to the roof and took a deep breath of air. The day had started out cold enough, but the sun had taken some of the chill out of the air for awhile. It was early afternoon now and dark clouds were looming along the northern horizon. He wondered if they were more likely to get snow or rain this winter when the sounds of a commotion drifted up from the inner bailey. He pulled a spyglass from his belt and spotted Varel and a member of the household staff hurrying into the keep. He turned his attention to the road to the estate and saw a group of travelers coming down the hill toward the main gates, still too far away to properly identify. Collapsing the spyglass, he returned to his chambers to clean up and change clothes.

xXx

Kallian was surprised by the number of people who were there to greet them when they returned to Vigil's Keep. The market had more stalls than it had on their departure and she could see that Armass had arrived before them with the aid of an ox and wagon. He acknowledged her with a curt nod. As they entered the inner bailey, the merchants returned to their stalls and everyone else quickly assembled in the center of the bailey. Zevran and Lucius stood at the front of the crowd, Varel, Woolsey and Garevel behind them. It was the moment she'd been longing for - coming home to Zevran and this community - but her reaction as the crowd gathered around them confused her. Her throat and chest felt tight, her pulse began to race, her breathing became laboured and a strange sense of anxiety washed over her. Lucius was at her side immediately, whining and nudging her hand with his head.

Zevran took her hand. "Tesora? Are you not well?"

So many things ran through her mind, but she opened her mouth and nothing came out. Her throat was dry, her hands clammy. _What is wrong with me?_

Zevran turned to the others. "Anders, what has happened?"

Anders cast a minor healing spell to calm Kallian and gripped her by the elbow, ushering them away from the crowd. "Excuse us. Nothing serious, folks, but the Commander needs her rest. Dorothy, could you please have some food sent to the Commander's chambers? Thanks, love," he called out to the cook as they climbed the stairs to the portcullis.

"Bit of a story, that," Anders responded to Zevran when they had finally reached the interior of the keep, away from the crowd and noise. "We'll have to have a meeting about it as soon as possible. We're okay, but we did have a bit of an upset and I think she's experiencing some anxiety as a result. It can happen after critical events. She just needs to lie down, have some peace and quiet, and take a break."

Kallian began to feel better the further away from the crowd they got, and while she couldn't fault him for it, or even stop him from doing it, she was annoyed with Anders for taking over yet again. The irritation was just enough to bring her back around to some semblance of her right frame of mind. _It won't bode well for me as commander or arlessa if this was how I return to Vigil's Keep after each mission away,_ she chided herself as the feeling of panic slowly receded.

Anders turned Kallian to face him. "Are you all right?" Her breathing was returning to normal and her eyes were clear and focused once again, but she was still rather pale.

"I-I don't know what happened, I just…You're right." She rolled her shoulders back. "I think you're right, Anders. A hot bath, a fire, a meal and a warm bed and I'll be fine." She took Zevran's hand in hers, trying not to grip it too tightly.

Anders' eyes narrowed. An aura of tension was rolling off her in waves and he suspected she was lying to put him off. "Right. I'm sending Petra up to see you."

"Anders, there's no need. You said the baby and I were fine. _Really_." Her tone and expression suggested she would suffer no arguments.

He didn't try to hide his irritation with her, his normally somewhat jolly expression replaced with a scowl, but he did acquiesce. "Well, I think I'm going to go collect Ser Pounce from Myriani and Talindra and get myself some food. I'll also let Varel know that you have a Joining ceremony to perform. You know where to find me if you need me. Zevran." He nodded to them both and turned back to the main entrance.

Zevran slipped his arm around Kallian and they walked to their chambers in silence. He had seen her like this before, after particularly disturbing events during their travels, and knew it was best to let her approach the matter herself. He led her into their bed chamber and helped her out of her armor, leaving her to finish undressing while he ran a bath, mixing several drops of a variety of essential oils into the water to help her relax.

"Did I see a Dalish elf with you?" he asked as he helped her into the bath.

Kallian nodded absentmindedly, sliding under the water to wet her hair while Zevran soaped up a wash cloth. "Velanna. She was killing the merchants. I recruited her. Long story," she said as she came back up out of the water and rested against the tub.

Zevran raised his eyebrows. A story worth hearing, certainly, but not tonight. He reached for her left arm and was about to begin washing her when he saw a scar at the crook of her elbow.

"What is this?" he asked, taking a closer look.

Magic had kept her skin relatively scar free for as long as he had known her and Anders was as good as, if not better than, Wynne. He had to wonder why she had a scar now. Kallian stiffened slightly, reaching out to touch the scar. Sighing, she looked up at him.

"Well, that's part of a long story, mio caro marito, but we found a silverite mine that the darkspawn are using as a base. We barely got in a short way when I set off a paralysis glyph and that creature I've seen in my dreams appeared…"

xXx

Zevran could hardly believe what he was hearing and he was glad to have the distraction of bathing Kallian as she told him of their capture and escape, and the things they had discovered on the way out of the mine. Few things in life scared him – his training with the Crows had certainly beaten quite a lot of fear out of him and had toughened him up considerably – but seeing his wife fearful and uncertain like this, knowing she had been traumatized and subjected to unknown experiments, that their son had been in danger as well…it was almost more than he could bear. He had to draw upon a great deal of his past training to steady his shaking hands and keep the tension from his face as he listened to her story. When he helped Kallian out of the bath and saw the curve of her belly, his heart ached. _In so short a time I have come to hold dear these things I never thought to have and I could not bear to lose them._

Kallian was shaken from reliving the ordeal, and telling Zevran of her fears and nightmare, but felt strangely lighter for it. and Zevran left her to dress herself while he helped Elspeth and Bronwyn set up their dinners in the sitting room and stoked the fire. She finally appeared in the doorway to their bed chamber, in a very becoming pale green dressing robe and gown, and found him staring into the flames.

"Zev?"

He turned to face her and the look of concern and intense concentration that was there softened. He crossed over to her and pulled her into a tight embrace.

"Kallian, mia tesora," he murmured as he nuzzled his face into her neck. "Ti amo."

"Ti amo, marito." She inhaled his scent, truly feeling at home and safe at last.

They held each other for what seemed like an eternity and then her stomach rumbled so loudly even Lucius heard it from across the room and woofed at Kallian as if telling her to eat.

"Yes, my friend. Your mistress will have her dinner." Zevran laughed as he led Kallian to the table. He served her some stew and bread, poured them each a goblet of ale, and then set about serving his own dinner. "Let us keep the conversation light, shall we? We can discuss all this later."

"Agreed. Umm…the market has expanded," she said.

Zevran nodded. "Yes. Lillith's network of contacts will generate quite a bit of business here if we are able to provide stalls for travelling merchants, and so we built more stalls. Mistress Woolsey and Varel can tell you more, but I believe they will be rented out to these merchants and the keep's own residents most days of the week, ensuring that the keep's market will have a variety of constantly changing goods."

"Meaning it's more likely people nearby may come here on a daily basis to see what we have and, hopefully, purchase or trade," she said thoughtfully. "When did the Qunari merchant, Armass, arrive?"

He chuckled. "Ah, so much like Sten, yes? Only a few hours before you. He told us to expect you and that you had invited him to trade here, but not in so many words, and that was about all he said."

Kallian smiled, pushing her empty trencher away from her. "Velanna's so much like Morrigan it isn't funny, Zev. She's blonde, she's elven, and she wears less revealing robes. Those are the only things that distinguish them from one another, I swear it."

"And she wishes to be a Warden?"

"Mmm. She thinks it will help her find her sister, Seranni, and it might. What exactly Seranni will be if and when Velanna ever finds her is a completely different question, however. Part of me hopes it won't happen." Kallian leaned back in her chair and sighed, exhaustion washing over her.

"I think I'm ready for that nap now, Zev."

He tossed his napkin aside and helped her up. "When would you like to perform this Joining?"

"This evening, so she can sleep it off overnight, if she survives."

"Very well, I will let the others know and wake you in a few hours." He helped her into bed and pulled the covers up around her, and sat beside her.

He brushed hair from her face, his eyes searching hers. "Sleep well, amore." He bent down and kissed her as her eyes drifted shut.

"Thank you…love you…"

It was only a moment or two longer before she was asleep and Zevran kissed her again, his lips lingering on her forehead as he breathed in the smell of her. He stayed by her side and watched her sleep for several minutes, going over everything she had told him. In spite of Kallian's recovery from the anxiety that had gripped her upon her return to the keep, it was clear to him that this last darkspawn encounter had affected her deeply.

"I regret that I was not with you, mia moglie," he whispered, cupping her cheek in his hand.

Even as he said it, Zevran wasn't sure what he could have done that the others couldn't. He was certain of one thing. This new breed of darkspawn and whatever they were plotting changed things dramatically, and for the first time since her recovery after the battle in Denerim, he truly feared for his wife and child.

* * *

**A/N:** As always, I extend my gratitude to Bioware for this universe. Thank you to my beta Mille Libri, for her input - I hope I've properly proofed my edits (typos at this point are my fault)! A shout out to my 'bouncers' Zevgirl and Zute! Last, but most certainly not the least, my thanks to those who read, comment/review, and add me and/or my stories to their lists. *blows kisses* Please read and review; I love hearing from you!

Tesora: treasure

Mia moglie: my wife

Mio marito: my husband

Ti amo: I love you

Amore: Love (used for 'my love/mio amore' in this case)

And…seven stone is roughly 98 pounds.


	13. Date Night

**Date Night**

9 Firstfall, 9:30

Zevran pulled himself away from Kallian with some difficulty, torn between his desire to stay at her side and his need to know more. He had been with her through many ordeals, had seen her work her way through a wide range of emotions in difficult times, but the look of panic on her face earlier worried him. He had expected that her duties as the Warden Commander could be dangerous, but the darkspawn were supposed to be retreating into the Deep Roads. This was the time when the Wardens should be standing vigilant. The events that had occurred in the silverite mine led him to believe the dangers to her and their child were quickly exceeding his expectations. He checked on Kallian one last time. She looked to be sleeping reasonably well and he pressed a lingering kiss to her forehead before slipping out of the room.

Lucius looked up at him with a low whine as he tidied up the remnants of their meal and moved the trays out to the hallway. Zevran handed the hound a scrap of bread and scratched him behind the ears, sinking into the chair beside him.

"What are we to do, Lucius? Your mistress is not helpless, but if something were to happen to her and our child, and there was any chance I could have prevented it…" The mabari looked up at Zevran, an eyebrow raised. Zevran couldn't help but chuckle at the animal's human-like expression of curiosity.

"I know I cannot protect her from all harm, but I cannot stay back and play the lord of the manor. I should be by her side, as should you. I will not allow her to leave you behind again, my friend." Lucius gave a low woof of approval and settled his head on his paws.

Zevran gave the dog a pat on the head. "Keep an eye on her. I will be back in a while."

xXx

Kallian sat up suddenly, hands grabbing at her neck and throat as if to pull something away, her eyes wide with fear, her breath coming in short gasps. She was no longer in a cave, strung up and surrounded by darkspawn; she was in her own bed. _Thank the Maker_. Lucius was standing by her side, one brow arched up questioningly.

"Just a nightmare, boy," she said firmly, more to convince herself than the hound. _Just a nightmare, nothing to be afraid of_, she repeated to herself. As much as she needed the rest, she couldn't bear the thought of sleeping alone at that moment.

"Zev?" she called out tentatively. There was no response. The door between their room and the outer sitting room was open; if he was there he would have heard her. He's probably making arrangements for Velanna's Joining ceremony.

"Let's go find Zev, Lucius," she said as she climbed out of bed and began to get dressed.

xXx

Zevran found Anders sitting by the fireplace in the library, sharing a bottle of whiskey with Nathaniel and Oghren. He sat down while Anders poured him a glass and Nathaniel put another log on the fire.

"We were…commiserating," Anders explained, raising his cup. The others returned the gesture and drank.

"How is the Commander?" Nathaniel asked.

"Kallian is sleeping. She ate well enough, and fell asleep quickly, so she may be past whatever came over her. How is Mhairi faring?" Mhairi wasn't much of a drinker, but she often did socialize with the other Wardens. He wondered if her absence meant she, too, was having difficulty dealing with the aftermath of their ordeal.

"She's okay, just tired, but I think maybe her experience as a soldier is making some of this easier to take," Anders replied. "Um…If I may ask, I've been wondering about something. Is there more to the Commander's fear about what the darkspawn might have done to her than I know? I understand fear of being raped," he shuddered as if imagining such a thing, "but is it just that?"

"The darkspawn take women, taint them and turn them into broodmothers. I'd kill a woman myself before I'd let that happen to 'er," Oghren growled. Zevran nodded in agreement.

Anders' face twisted with disgust, clearly grasping the implications of Oghren's comment. "Oh. I…ah…I don't think I need any more information on that, then."

"Varel and the others would like to meet with you and Kallian tomorrow afternoon," Zevran said, wanting to change the subject. "What else did you find on your travels?"

"There is a substantial granite deposit near the silverite mine and the mine itself, lyrium sand, and all the goods scattered throughout the forest, thanks to Velanna," Nathaniel replied. "We set numerous crates and barrels aside, hoping to salvage them later. Perhaps a group of soldiers and some of our merchants could take care of that. I suspect the Architect has left the area, but we should take every precaution."

The four men drank their whiskey and fell into silence for several minutes before Zevran spoke again.

"What happened to Kallian earlier? I have not seen her act that way before."

"Well, from the moment we stepped into the Wending Woods it was one long string of skirmishes and ambushes, deaths and disappointments." Anders looked around and lowered his voice to a whisper. "And that mage, Velanna, just added to the tension, what with the murderous rampage and her bad attitude. Never mind the mess we had to clean up there."

Nathaniel nodded. "Add to that the stress of falling into the Architect's trap and being held prisoner to his whims…"

"And the fact that the rules of the game and the blighters playin' it changed…" Oghren growled into his mug.

xXx

Kallian and Lucius padded down the hallway toward the library, the first place she'd thought to look for Zevran. She could see the door was open, the rosy glow of a fire spilling out into the hallway, and she smiled, imagining Zevran sitting by the fire. Quite suddenly, Zevran's voice drifted out into the hall.

"What happened to Kallian earlier? I have not seen her act that way before."

She stopped and motioned for Lucius to stay still. Moving to the wall along the library, she inched closer to the door, controlling her breathing so she could hear the rest of the conversation.

xXx

"And the fact that the rules of the game and the blighters playin' it changed…" Oghren was saying.

"And you have a lot of stress. It was a lot to swallow in one day." Anders sighed. "I think she felt it the most of all of us. I've seen people who have experienced a traumatic event and seem to be fine at first, unravel later on. They begin to behave irrationally and erratically, lose their patience more often than normal, while some may get dizzy, vomit…there are many symptoms. She was taken with anxiety."

Zevran considered that for a minute. "Is it likely to happen again? Could such a thing put her, our child, or her command in jeopardy?"

"Well, I…I don't know if it will happen again, I don't know what exactly triggered it." Anders was beginning to look uncomfortable. "Why aren't you talking to the Commander about this?"

"Under the circumstances, I thought it best we talk of other things so the moment could pass and she could get some rest." Zevran stood and went to the hearth, watching the flames. "I am not ashamed to admit that I am worried for her and our child." In another life he never could have put words to feelings such as these, if he'd ever even had them, but as Oghren said, things had changed.

"I'm sure she'll be fine after some rest and relaxation. It was just a reaction to the stress of such an intense set of circumstances," Anders reassured him. "We should all take some time to recuperate."

"You could come out with us, Zev, and keep an eye on her back like the good ol' days," Oghren suggested.

"I had thought of that," Zevran replied.

"That way you'll see her comin' for ya when she hears about this," the dwarf finished with a grin.

"Wait, what?" Anders asked nervously, looking back and forth between elf and dwarf.

"I was married once, son, and…"

"Only the once? I can't imagine why."

Oghren growled before he continued. "I'm sayin' women like the Commander don't want to be treated 's'if they're fragile and in need of protection."

"You have a very valid point, my stout little friend," Zevran sighed.

"Indeed he does." Kallian's voice drifted to them from across the room.

The four men turned to see Kallian standing in the entrance to the library, arms crossed over her chest. She was wearing a pair of linen pants and one of Zevran's shirts, loosely laced at the neck, a woolen shawl around her shoulders. Stray curls from her ponytail framed her face, making her look a little wild. Her eyes flashed with anger.

Anders quickly emptied his cup and stood. "I was about to leave."

"Yes. We have a Joining ceremony after supper to prepare for, if you could please be so kind as to get that arranged."

"Yes, Commander."

Oghren appeared to have no intention of leaving, but Anders and Nathaniel pulled him from his seat and steered him to the hallway, sparing Zevran a sympathetic glance as they closed the door behind them. When they were finally alone, Kallian turned to Zevran. Her eyes were dark, her face flushed, her jaw set. She closed the gap between them, standing at the opposite side of the fireplace. Lucius padded along beside her and sat between the two elves.

"It is not what you think."

"No? Oh, well that's good to know. Because I thought you might be discussing my fitness to command, to cope with the stress of the job, behind my back, with my men." Lucius grumbled and slid down into a more relaxed pose, head on his paws.

"All right, it may have sounded that way, but that was not my intention, Kalli. I wanted to know if there was something I could do to help, to know what happened…"

"You could have asked me, instead of going to my men." She could feel her throat tightening up, sensed the prickle of tears in her eyes, and was furious with herself for being emotional at that exact moment in time.

"I had a nightmare about…darkspawn, and I…I was looking for you, hoping you'd…and I find you here…" She gestured to the door, no longer sure of what she was trying to say. After a pause her anger flared again. "What I don't need right now is my husband second guessing me and undermining my authority with my Wardens."

A wave of exhaustion rolled over her and she tipped her head up, trying to blink away her tears. The past couple of days had been far more emotionally draining and tiring than she had been willing to admit and she knew she shouldn't be getting into arguments with anyone, least of all her husband. She couldn't stop the tears from falling and made a frustrated sound in her throat, wiping at her eyes with a sleeve.

Zevran stepped closer to her. "I am sorry, tesora. I only wish to protect that which I hold dear. I did not mean to question you or your ability to command, truly. I was trying to understand what happened to you, but you are right, I should have asked you." He held his hand out to her. "Come sit with me, please, amore."

Kallian hesitated. Part of her wanted to be angry; she _was_ angry. But the more vulnerable part of her, desperate to forget those horrid images of darkspawn pawing at her, was winning out. She took his hand and followed him to the nearby loveseat. They sat down and he turned to face her, her hand still in his.

"What is happening, bella?" he asked, cupping her chin with his other hand so she would look at him.

"They were right," she admitted finally. "It was…well, it wasn't quite the walk in the woods I'd thought it would be. I thought I'd be standing vigilant, you know?"

"Do you know I had that very same thought earlier?" Zevran smiled, brushing his thumb over her lips before releasing her chin.

"The darkspawn are…different. How is that possible? Why is it we never met one of these talking darkspawn before now? And the way they toyed with Velanna? All the people whose lives were lost over this misunderstanding?" She stared into the flames for a while, slowly shaking her head.

"I'm…afraid, Zev. I thought I knew what I was up against, but things have changed and I'm not so sure of myself now, I guess."

Throughout their travels during the Blight, he had seen her struggle with the responsibility she felt for others and what she perceived as failures to protect them. She would beat herself up over one thing or another, but she always picked herself up and moved on again. He wondered if that was becoming more difficult for her to do now or if there was more to it. Something she'd said earlier came to mind.

He pulled Kallian closer and wrapped his arms around her. "You said something about a nightmare? The same one from this morning?"

Kallian's breath hitched and she slid her arms around him. "There was more to it this time," she whispered, fresh tears flowing. "They strung me up and started pulling at my armor…" Kallian buried her face in the folds of his shirt, sobbing.

Zevran held her tightly as she cried, both grateful and pained at the same time. He couldn't bear to hear her talk of the dream any longer and couldn't imagine it would do her any good, so the crying was a good thing. That she was haunted by such a horror, something he could do nothing about, was not.

"That will never happen to you, mia cara, never," he promised fiercely, remembering the oath the companions had sworn to one another when they were in the Deep Roads during the Blight. _Never_. They had all agreed it would be better to kill a woman than risk losing her to that fate if there was no hope of rescue.

A few minutes later Zevran realized Kallian had cried herself to sleep. He looked down at her head where it lay on his chest and stroked her hair. He gently lifted her and carried her back to their rooms. With a little juggling and help from Lucius, who pushed doors open for him, he got Kallian back onto their bed. He settled down beside her, snuggled up to her and dozed off himself.

xXx

_11 Firstfall, 9:30_

_The Dalish mage, Velanna, survived her Joining and did not seem overly concerned about any of the consequences of being a Warden. However, I had to tell her, and Mhairi, about how darkspawn breed and think that conversation easily trumps all others as the most difficult I've ever had. Both women were shaken, obviously, and Velanna is now more determined than ever to find her sister. I cannot help but wonder about her past. She is like a Keeper, and yet she had so few clan members with her. I should hate to think that they were wiped out in a conflict with humans, yet that is so often the way it goes. She's such a prickly sort, I do not dare to ask her about it._

_The past two days have been busy and not very restful in spite of Anders' and Petra's efforts. We have had a few meetings with Varel, Garevel and Woolsey, on matters pertaining to the Wardens and the arling. Our first priority was to prepare a report on the events in the Wending Woods for Alistair and First Warden Ronan, which Nathaniel and I wrote. Our account was too heavy to send by Fereldan Carrier pigeon, so we have sent them ahead with encrypted messages advising of the arrival of the full reports which are being sent by rider to Denerim and the City of Amaranthine. From there, the First Warden's report will be sent to Weisshaupt by ship. Maker only knows how long it will take for First Warden Ronan to get the report, never mind respond to it, and I can only hope the voyage to the Anderfels goes smoothly._

_Mistress Woolsey tells us that trade has improved significantly over the past week and while she is a bit leery about Armaas, she seems impressed with him so far. He accompanied Yuriah and several soldiers to the Wending Woods and returned within a day with the goods we had set aside for salvage. Woolsey has paid our stipends, everyone seems in good spirits and the market is busy._

_At some point very soon, I will have to return to the City of Amaranthine to speak with Mervis and return to him all the personal effects and papers we found on the dead merchants. Keenan's wife is also there, I assume at one of the guest houses. I hope it won't be too difficult to find her._

_Voldrik Glavonak was thrilled to learn of the granite deposit and immediately arranged to have a team of his workers go to the Wending Woods with a few soldiers to look at mining the stone. Dworkin almost danced with joy when we gave him the lyrium sand we had found. He has provided us with several of his special bombs, but cautioned me against using them unless I could get to solid cover before the actual explosion. Wade, on the other hand, wasn't too excited about the silverite. He finds it too boring. Herren was more interested and hopes we will still be able to access deposits within the mine._

_Another five recruits for the guard have arrived and Garevel feels they all hold promise, although some perhaps less so than others. They will undergo a few days' training and then take their oaths if they are deemed fit. Still, no one has expressed any interest in joining the Wardens, beyond those I've managed to collect so far. Unfortunately, I am not surprised. If I weren't a Warden, I would want to forget all about the darkspawn, if I could, if I thought it would help._

_I continue to have difficulty sleeping, and I fail to see how I will get much rest before we leave for the Blackmarsh. Although I still sense that Kristoff is alive, his continued absence makes me all the more curious about his whereabouts and activities, and I wish to resolve that matter as soon as possible._

_~KA_

12 Firstfall, 9:30

Kallian started awake and stifled a groan, certain she hadn't slept more than a few minutes. This time it seemed that Zevran's hand on her shoulder had done it. Three nights now, she'd tossed and turned most of the night, catching a few minutes of sleep here and there, nightmares and imagined assaults jarring her awake. Zevran's leg had moved against hers when they napped before Velanna's Joining and Kallian had practically jumped out of bed before she'd even opened her eyes. Their sleep wasn't the only thing that was off kilter. They hadn't made love and it certainly wasn't for lack of opportunity. At first, it was because she had clearly been traumatized and needed to rest, then there was the Joining, the meetings with the administrative team and the reporting. But when she ran out of reasons to avoid it, she realized that she had been avoiding it. When Zevran pulled her close and she closed her eyes all she could think of, see, hear or smell, was darkspawn, and it left her deeply confused. She wanted to be with Zevran, needed to be with him, and she hated her mind for turning on her this way. _I have to get past this damned nightmare._

Zevran shifted against her. "What is it, mia tesora?" he asked, kissing her shoulder. "Nightmares?"

Kallian nodded, saddened beyond measure. Something he had said to her during their honeymoon came back to her. "We must be open and honest with each other in all things. You should not bear the burden of these doubts on your own, you do not have to. Promise me this."

She sat up and faced him. "I need…want to be with you, but I…I can't because all I see when I close my eyes…"

"Shhh…I understand, I do. Is there anything I can I do for you?"

"I don't know what I need, or what to do," she sniffled, tears spilling down her cheeks. "You are my husband, my home, my anchor, and I need you now more than ever. This is…upsetting."

Zevran sat up and took her hands in his. He had already given this some thought. "Let us try something different, yes? We will get dressed and break our fast, and then we will part ways and avoid each other until the evening meal. You go about your training, this bridge business you must attend to, and whatever else you must do." He squeezed her fingers. "I have something in mind. I will send for you by early evening. Agreed?"

"Okay." Wiping her cheeks, she smiled at him. "What…"

"Oh no, it will be a surprise." He stood up and pulled her out of bed. "Come, we both have a busy day ahead of us."

xXx

Zevran's cheerful and teasing manner had lightened Kallian's mood. It felt good to get out of the keep for her exercise routine and when she had finished sparring with some of the soldiers, she met Nathaniel at the archery range for another lesson. She was getting quite good at notching and firing arrows in quick succession and Nathaniel was pleased with her progress. When he felt they had done enough for the day, he suggested they get something to eat and walked her back to the keep.

After a few minutes of silence, he cleared his throat. "Commander, I feel I owe you an apology."

Kallian smiled at him. "For the other day? It's not necessary, Nate. It's fine."

He shook his head. "No, not for that, for coming here with the intention of killing you. An apology is necessary."

They stopped walking and stood at the stairs leading into the keep. Nathaniel folded his arms across his chest and cast his gaze over the entrance, the portcullis and walls, before looking back at Kallian. "When I came back from the Free Marches, I had hoped to…repair some bridges, as it were. My father and I didn't really have the best relationship, but I still wanted his approval. When I heard what had happened to him…" His voice trailed off and Kallian imagined the memories were still rather fresh for him.

Nathaniel shook his head. "My father did it all to himself. No conspiracies, just one stupid, selfish man. I should have known better."

Kallian put her hand on his arm. "Nate, how could you have possibly known?"

"I should have dug deeper before I acted. I was foolish and like a child I sought to blame you and the Wardens. But you weren't at all what I expected. You've given me a chance, a place to live, a new purpose. You've placed your trust in me and you're even proving to be a friend of sorts. Unless I'm misreading that, too?"

Kallian laughed. "No, Nate, you read that right. I'd like to be friends. Now come on," she said, pulling him up the stairs. "You were the one who said we should eat and I'm starving. Race you."

With that she was off and running and much to his surprise, Nathaniel chased after her, oblivious to the looks they got along the way.

xXx

Kallian looked back and forth between Lady Liza Packton and Ser Derren, considering her options. She waved to Garevel, who held the papers in question, took them from him and examined them for a few minutes before waving Varel and Nathaniel closer.

Lowering her voice, she asked, "Are these documents legal?"

Varel took the papers from her and scanned them. "It would seem so. And while you could decide to overrule them and return the bridge to Ser Derren, I would be careful if I were you, Commander. Ser Derren is already an ally. By upholding these agreements, you could gain Lady Packton's support as well. You would, however, have to compensate Ser Derren somehow, I would think."

Kallian nodded and turned to Nathaniel. "Do you agree, Nate?" she asked, amused by the somewhat surprised look that flickered across his face before he adopted a more neutral expression.

"It does appear that Ser Derren's father and their seneschal approved of the transfer, and I do agree with Varel's assessment of the parties involved. Perhaps you could offer Ser Derren a comparable piece of land adjoining his estate, hunting and fishing rights, a freeze on taxes for a time, or something to that effect."

"Thank you, gentlemen." Kallian took the papers from Varel, stood and stepped off the dais to stand before Ser Derren.

"These documents do appear legal, Ser Derren, and so I feel I cannot overrule them. However, I would like invite you to enjoy our hospitality for the evening so that tomorrow we may negotiate the terms of a settlement to compensate you for this loss of land and income. Would that be agreeable?"

The young man nodded slowly. "My father built that bridge, my liege, but I accept. Thank you."

"Lady Packton," Kallian said, turning to the woman to hand her the documents she held. "If you would like to spend the night with us before you return to Teyrn's Down, you are more than welcome. If you wish to travel this afternoon, however, please let my seneschal know and we will arrange to send you with some provisions for the journey."

Lady Packton bowed her head. "Thank you, my liege, you are most generous."

Garevel led the two from the throne room and Kallian returned to the dais. "Varel, I'll trust you and Mistress Woolsey to come up with some ideas to work out an agreement with Ser Derren. Just let me know what time works best for us to meet with him tomorrow."

"Very well, Commander. Is there anything else you need?"

"Um…no, I don't think so. We're done here?" Looking around the room, there were no more nobles or commoners to be seen, just the Wardens and various staff members. Varel hadn't prepared her for any other cases and she was very curious to know what Zevran had been up to all day.

Varel nodded. "Yes, Commander. I have been asked to arrange for Elspeth to escort you to your chambers, Commander." He waved the elven maid over and stood, collecting his writing materials.

"Excuse me?"

"I was told it was a surprise, Commander," Varel said with a sly smile. "Nathaniel, perhaps you could assist Woolsey and I with this?" he asked, waving his journal in the air.

"Of course. Commander, enjoy your evening." Nathaniel nodded to Kallian and followed Varel into the antechamber.

Kallian's brow quirked with curiosity as she watched the two men leave the throne room. Turning to Elspeth, she said, "That was an odd thing to say, don't you think?"

"I wouldn't know, Commander," Elspeth replied with a quick curtsy.

"Sooo…" Kallian said, eying the maid as they turned and headed to the second floor. "Why are you taking me to my rooms?"

"My lord thought you would want assistance with your armor and such, Commander," came the polite response.

_'And such'…I wonder what that means?_ Kallian mused to herself.

The answer wasn't very long in coming. Their chambers were lit by a fire, and sparkling candle light drew Kallian into the bed chamber where she took a deep breath. The room smelled of the outdoors, of rain and trees and dirt. Pine boughs had been brought in and hung around the room and the doors out to the battlements beyond had been opened to air the room out. Elspeth closed them quickly, drew the heavy curtains shut and put a few small logs on the fire to warm the room. Kallian began to unbuckle her armor and Elspeth assisted her, taking the pieces and laying them aside to be cleaned. When Kallian was down to her tunic and leggings, Elspeth motioned to the bath.

"Oh," Kallian gasped when Elspeth opened the door.

The room was warm and fragrant, lit with more candles, and the bathtub was full of steaming water. She recognized a favorite sensual blend of Zevran's, made with vanilla and kukui oil, with a hint of the rare ylang ylang flower. A dressing screen had been placed by the tub and Kallian slipped behind it to remove the rest of her clothes and tie her hair up.

"If it please you, my lady, my lord asked that I let you soak and bathe for a spell. Would you like a bit of ale?"

"Mmmhmm," Kallian murmured as she slid into the hot water. The chill in the air was forgotten and she could feel herself relaxing almost immediately.

She watched reflections of candlelight dance along the top of the water and was only vaguely aware of Elspeth retreating into the sitting room and returning a moment later to put a glass down on the edge of the tub. In a hushed voice, the maid announced that she would be leaving and would return within twenty minutes to help Kallian dress. Kallian nodded dreamily and leaned back against the tub, immersing herself up to her neck for a few minutes.

The ale was tasty and cool, a nice contrast to the warmth that was enveloping her. She had a few sips and soaked a while longer, thinking of things she associated with this fragrance. Zevran had used this particular blend of oils on several occasions, for those massages that were meant to calm the nerves and stimulate the senses, and which always led to sex. A nervous flutter passed through her and she smiled to herself at the thought. Taking a cloth and bar of soap, she washed herself and then soaked for several minutes while drinking her ale. Elspeth returned and had a warmed drying towel ready for Kallian as she stepped out of the tub.

Bronwyn was waiting for them by the wardrobe in the bed chamber with a few items of clothing in her hands. She curtsied and smiled shyly. "We're to dress you, my lady, and send you to your husband."

Zevran had obviously gone to a great deal of effort to plan a special evening for the two of them and Kallian decided to let the two maids do what they had been asked to do, rather than question anything. She was dressed in a new breast band and matching small clothes made of pale green lace, a white chemise with a bit of ruffle around the low-scooped neckline, and a simple, dark green dress that clung to her curves quite nicely. The two maids then sat her down at the vanity so they could rearrange her hair into a loose twist at the back of her head and apply a bit of blush to her cheeks, stain to her lips, kohl to her eyes, and a dab of scented oil to her pulse points. Bronwyn and Elspeth murmured their approval as Kallian stood in front of the mirror and turned from side to side, examining the end results.

"You look beautiful, my lady," Elspeth said as she stood back to admire Kallian.

"Thank you, both of you, for this."

Bronwyn produced a parchment from her apron and handed it to Kallian. "Good night, my lady," she said, and the two maids curtsied and left Kallian's chambers.

Kallian unfolded the parchment and smiled as she recognized Zevran's slanting scrawl.

_Kallian, mia tesora…_

_I trust the scented bath brought back some of the many pleasant memories we already share together. Join me in the tower for more sensual delights. Z_

Her cloak was draped over the back of a chair near the door and she put it on. Assuming Zevran was referring to the tower where his lab was, she went to the end of the hallway and into the stairwell, following a trail of torches that eventually ended at the base of the tower. The door was slightly ajar and she could smell roasted meat. She recognized the spicy scent as a seasoning blend she had first sampled during the Blight, when Zevran had decided they all might live longer if he took over Alistair's cooking duties. Kallian pulled the door open and hurried up the stairs into the tower room.

Zevran's lab had been transformed and the sight of it took her breath away. The fireplace served as a campfire, of sorts, with two log seats and wooden trenchers, spoons and glasses set on the floor nearby. Across from the fireplace, bolts of fabric had been draped over the rafters to mimic a tent around the pile of furs and blankets that were arranged there. Zevran stood at the door to the roof, dressed in his cloak, a white linen shirt and tan leggings. She couldn't help but admire how they clung to his muscular frame.

"And you look equally lovely, tesora," he chuckled, correctly interpreting her expression.

"Zevran, this…this is wonderful. Our own private campsite, without the danger of bandits or darkspawn. And the food smells so good…" she groaned, stepping toward the fire.

He came forward to offer her his hand. "All in good time, Kalli. Come to the roof with me."

She took his hand and followed him to the door. They ran up the stairs and out into the cold, darkening evening. The skies were clear and deep blue, painted with a band of crimson along the horizon. Here and there a bright star glowed, and more joined them as the light waned. A strong breeze stirred the trees along the mountainside behind the keep, bringing with it what few sounds of life could be heard from far below. Zevran watched as Kallian went to the edge of the roof and looked out over all that she could see. He wanted her to see, hear and smell things that would make her feel comfortable, at home, and happy. He had done his best to create an environment that would soothe and relax - good food and ale, and pleasant sights and smells would all delight her, as he had seen so many times throughout the Blight. He suspected these things reminded her of her connection to the environment around her and the sense of community she so enjoyed. The weather had certainly cooperated. A light rain earlier in the day had cleaned the air and it was pure luck the clouds had blown over, allowing this lovely sunset.

"Would you like more ale?" he asked, pouring himself a glass from a pitcher he'd had set out on a table.

"Please. What is it?" Kallian came back to his side and took a glass.

"Varel calls it 'Amaranthine wheat ale'."

"Well, here's to Amaranthine wheat ale," Kallian said, taking a sip.

She slipped her arm around Zevran's waist and snuggled up to him, barely realizing how much more comfortable she was feeling now. "Mmm, everything smells so good. My bath, our rooms, the food, this ale, you, even Amaranthine smells good."

"You smell terribly delicious yourself, mia cara, but you must eat first. Come, we have roasted wild boar with wild mushrooms, potato and leek, and some of Dorothy's sourdough bread."

Kallian groaned. "Maker, what are we waiting for?" Laughing, she pulled Zevran back down the stairs.

Her playful mood was encouraging. Zevran took her cloak and folded it up, draping it over one of the logs to make a cushion for her as he had done so many nights at camp. He helped her get comfortable, and then served their meals. He handed Kallian her trencher before taking a moment to make a seat for himself and getting settled.

"Oh, this is…mmm…delicious," Kallian moaned as she popped a slice of meat into her mouth.

"Thank you. It took me a while to talk Dorothy out of that chunk of roast and to convince her that I could cook it myself, but I taught her how I was seasoning it and that seemed to make up for the invasion of her space." He looked up to find Kallian staring at him. "What is it?"

"You did this all yourself?" She cast a glance around the room.

"The cooking, yes. This…" he waved a hand around the room, "wasn't so hard to do and I did get some help from Alison, Elspeth and Bronwyn."

Kallian ate more of her dinner, stealing the occasional glance at Zevran, and more than ever it did feel as if they were at camp. She felt a nervous excitement, that same deep-in-her-belly feeling she had felt when she first began to realize that she was attracted to him. It had been a night at camp, very much like this, she realized. He had made a comfortable place for her to sit and served up a bowl of stew, poured her some of the Antivan Brandy they had found and literally waited on her the entire evening.

"What are you thinking, tesora?" he asked, putting his trencher down.

"I was remembering another time like this, during the Blight. We were returning to Redcliffe with Andraste's ashes, I was exhausted…well, we all were, but you…you took care of me that first night out of Haven. You put up my tent, fed me, and put me to bed without making a single attempt to flirt with me or talk me into your bed." She smiled, remembering the looks they'd gotten from the rest of the group, the way Alistair had glared at Zevran for days afterward.

Zevran's face broke into a grin. "Ah yes, the Chantry boy sulked for days."

"I was just thinking that!" Kallian laughed. "I began to fall in love with you that night, you know. You tucked me into my sleeping roll, got Lucius to settle at my side, wished me good night and left and I…I just knew that there was something there."

Zevran smiled and reached for a kettle and two mugs that had been sitting by the fire. As he filled the mugs, Kallian leaned forward and sniffed the steam wafting in her direction.

"Ooh, is that spiced Antivan tea?" she whispered. "Where did you get it?" The smell was divine and made her mouth water.

Zevran handed her a mug and took a sip from his own. "Lillith has a regular supplier in Antiva, who has a small fleet of ships for importing and exporting," he replied.

Kallian drank some tea and moaned. "Holy Maker, this is delicious. Mmmm." She sighed and leaned back on her log, taking another sip.

Zevran did the same, and they enjoyed their spiced tea, watching the flames dance in the fireplace. After a while, Zevran stood and began to light candles around the room. Kallian watched him out of the corner of her eye, thinking back on all that he had done for her this evening. She felt incredibly lucky to have such a caring, sensitive husband. She wasn't certain that she had worked through the inner turmoil that had dogged her since her encounter with the Architect, but she couldn't let it keep her from her husband any longer. She had been foolish to shy away from the comfort he could provide, and as she watched him move around the room, desire for him surged through her body.

"Zev." She stood up and took the burning piece of bark he was using to light the candles. Tossing it into the fireplace, she pressed her lips to his palm before looking up into his eyes.

"Grazie, mio amore, for everything you have done for me. Not just this evening, but every day since we met. Well, after you tried to kill me, of course."

"Of course." Zevran smiled down at her, waiting. He wanted her to be in control, to make the decision about what happened next.

"I appreciate that you have given me what I needed, even when I didn't know what that was. I…I want you…now."

She kissed him passionately, pulling him closer to her. Zevran's hand slid to the back of her neck, cradling her head as he responded. He could feel her fingers working the laces of his leggings as she pushed him back toward the furs. They pulled at each other's clothing as they moved blindly across the room, laughing as they fumbled along. Kallian's physical responses were back in full force, her breath was coming in short gasps, and she was growing impatient.

Kicking her shoes off, she pulled her dress and chemise over her head, and tossed them aside, removing her smalls next. Zevran pushed his leggings and smalls down to his ankles and kicked them off. He was sitting down to remove his shirt when Kallian pushed him onto his back and sat on him. "Now."

Her movements were strong and her confidence was back, he could sense it. It was intoxicating. Her eyes held his and she gripped his swollen manhood, impaling herself on him in one quick movement. The feel of her, warm and tight around him, was a relief and he could see that she was similarly affected by their union.

She moved slowly at first, undulating her hips back and forth, the feeling of him beneath her bringing her fully back around to herself. This was real, her nightmares were not, and Zevran would always do what he could to protect her. She believed in this more than anything else and that belief brought her more happiness than she thought possible. Zevran's hands roamed over her body, pausing now and then to playfully squeeze her breasts or her bottom, inciting her passions further. Their pleasure built until at last they reached their climax together, and Kallian collapsed onto his chest, gasping.

They lay that way for several minutes before the cold night air moved Zevran to pull the blankets around their bodies, and then they made love again before drifting off into a peaceful slumber. Kallian had a restful sleep for the first time in several days, blissfully ignorant of the unrest that would find them in the morning.

* * *

**A/N:** As always, my thanks to Bioware and my beta, Mille Libri. She helped me quite a bit with this chapter and I hope I've addressed all we discussed...! Props to Zevgirl and Zute! Thank you, readers, for sticking with me and sending your comments. I love hearing from you, so please do review and/or comment.

Tesora - Treasure

Grazie, mio amore - Thank you, my love


	14. CSI: Amaranthine

**CSI: Amaranthine**

13 Firstfall, 9:30

Kallian stirred and opened her eyes, wondering what had awoken her. The chill of night had settled into the tower; a small pile of coals smoldered in the hearth and the candles had either burned down or blown out. Next to her, Zevran radiated warmth. He awoke and reached out to slide an arm around her waist.

"Mmmm?" he mumbled as he spooned against her side.

"Something…" In the distance, barely audible, someone shouted and a moment later the guard tower bell rang in earnest.

Zevran and Kallian were on their feet and dressing without further delay and ran down from the tower to the armory to grab some weapons for Kallian. At the main door to the keep they met a group of soldiers who had been off duty for the night.

"What's happening?" Kallian asked, pausing to catch her breath.

Ser Marcus stepped forward and used the peephole to check the bailey beyond before unlocking the door. "We don't know, my lady. Captain Garevel told us to guard the entrance when the alarm was raised. Be careful, my lord and lady." He pulled the door open and waved Alec over to accompany Kallian and Zevran.

The sound of someone yelling for light, and a high pitched whinnying and stomping of hooves, came from the outer bailey. The market was empty save for a group of soldiers who escorted two men to the prison cells and they disappeared down the stairwell. Ser Aiden and two other members of the keep's guard approached them with a rather large and angry looking man in tow. He struggled and shouted that they had no evidence against him and would pay for this mistake. The group of men passed under a torch and was close enough to Kallian and Zevran that she could see the man's finery was bloodied, particularly around the cuffs of his shirt. When he caught Kallian scrutinizing him he stopped abruptly.

"Who are you and what the bloody blazes are you looking at, elf?" he bellowed.

Ser Aiden pulled hard on the ropes binding the man's hands, jerking him forward and down on one knee. "You will address the Arlessa, your liege lord, with respect."

"Gently, Ser Aiden, but thank you for answering the who. As for the what, I was looking at you." She cocked her head to one side, eyeing the man. "But I am at a disadvantage. You are…?" She took in several details; the fine clothing, the scratches on his left cheek and abrasions on his knuckles, the large signet ring on his right hand.

"Ser Temmerly," he snarled. Ser Aiden cuffed the back of Temmerly's head, causing the man to add, "_My liege_," his voice full of contempt.

"Hmm. Ser Aiden, why is this man in custody?"

"My lady, it grieves me to have to tell you this, but he's been arrested on suspicion of what I hope is only attempted murder. I missed the woman's name, but she was here as your guest earlier this month."

Kallian froze for a moment, the possibilities running through her mind. _Leliana? No, she's too clever…isn't she? Maker please._

Zevran's voice cut into her thoughts. "Make sure you obtain all of Ser Temmerly's clothing, that shirt in particular, and keep it safe. Give him something else to wear. I think one or two of the men amongst you is roughly his size. If you find _anything_ of interest in Ser Temmerly's possession, bring it to Varel."

"Yes, my lord." Ser Aiden and the others hauled Ser Temmerly up to his feet and turned toward the prison entrance.

With some force, the man lunged toward Kallian, yelling, "You knife-eared bi-"

Alec pulled Kallian out of harm's way as Zevran punched Temmerly in the chest, striking the bundle of nerves there with sharp force. The blow brought the prisoner to his knees once again, this time in pain and gasping for air.

Zevran crouched down and glared at Temmerly. "If you ever threaten my wife or speak to her that way again, I promise it will not end well for you." Zevran stood and straightened his clothes, nodding to the guards.

"My lord, lady." Ser Aiden and the others pulled Temmerly away and to the prison.

"My lady, did I hurt you?"

"No, Alec…Alec? The shepherd?" Kallian barely recognized the man.

"Yes, my lady. I've been with the guard for just over a week now. This is my third shift."

She smiled, pleased that he appeared so healthy, even if he was still thin. "I am fine, thank you, Alec. Please give us just a moment."

When he had moved several paces away, she turned to Zevran. "I'm just sick, Zev. What if-"

He took her hand in his. "You don't know who it is yet, tesora."

She squeezed her eyes shut and nodded. "You're right."

"Come." Zevran hooked her arm around his and nodded to Alec, steering Kallian toward the outer bailey, his head close to hers. "There will be an investigation. You have the right of high justice and will appoint an investigator."

"And who better to head an investigation than an assassin?"

"If you are asking me if I accept the appointment, then yes."

"O…Okay." Kallian slowed down and stopped, transfixed by what she saw.

Men and women had gathered in a semi-circle around a wagon, holding up torches to cast light upon the scene before them. Nathaniel, Oghren, Mhairi and Maverlies held the wagon steady while Varel and Garevel unhitched its horses; Anders and Petra crouched in the back, hunched over something, their healing magics flowing. Velanna appeared from out of the darkness and joined them, her normally acerbic manner replaced by something resembling compassion. Zevran squeezed her arm and she stepped closer to the wagon. As Kallian and Zevran drew near, she saw a woman lying in the wagon, her clothes bloody in several places, her face bruised. Her first reaction was to breathe a sigh of relief; it was not Leliana. Guilt followed; it was Ser Tamra, most likely a casualty of the conspiracy against Kallian and the Wardens.

A pale and frightened looking man was in the seat of the wagon, staring at the fallen knight, twisting the reins of his wagon around his hands. Kallian climbed up and sat next to him, putting her hand on his to calm him and draw his attention.

"What is your name, good man, and what happened?"

"M-my lady…ah…I am A-arthur." Kallian smiled at him and squeezed his hands encouragingly. Taking a deep breath, he started again. "Your soldiers woke me, less than an hour ago, perhaps only thirty minutes, and asked me for help. They had this lady with them, and hoped to get her here to save her life." He glanced back down at Ser Tamra and the three mages who were attempting to do just that. "They were able to slow the bleeding, but..."

"Arthur, thank you for your help."

Garevel, who had handed off the horses to a soldier, came to Zevran's side and reported what he knew. "From what I understand, the patrol found Ser Tamra on the side of the road, and shortly thereafter, as they sought this man's help, they found Ser Temmerly and some of his men. They acted quite suspiciously, and drawing the only conclusion the soldiers could under such circumstances, they arrested the men and made their way here." His expression was grim as he watched the mages try to heal the knight. "She was a friend of King Cailan's."

Kallian turned to face the Captain. "Thank you, Garevel. Make sure the prisoners are properly secured, if you would. We'll deal with them in…the afternoon? Maker, I have no idea what time it is." She rubbed her forehead, collecting her thoughts. "Ah…We will want to speak to the members of the patrol as well, please ask them to be available.

"Mistress Woolsey, take this man to get something hot to drink, food if he wishes, and a bed for the rest of the night, please. Have a rest before you return home," she told the anxious driver. "Your horses can stay in our stables."

"Damnit!" Anders exclaimed abruptly. Looking up over his shoulder to Kallian and Zevran, he shook his head. "She's gone, it was too late, we couldn't save her."

Silence descended upon the group for several seconds, before Kallian finally muttered, "May she find peace with the Maker."

_Breathe, breathe, _she told herself as she heard one of the women nearby stifle a sob. Her own throat was tight, her eyes stinging, and she felt weary. _This isn't right, Tamra didn't deserve to die. She barely knew me, and yet she was loyal and she paid for it with her life. _Anger filled Kallian, giving her a second wind and she stood, clearing her throat.

"Zevran, I would be grateful if you'd lead the investigation into Ser Tamra's murder."

He nodded. "I should have a word with Captain Garevel before we continue here, to give him some instructions on how to deal with Temmerly and his men."

"Thank you. Mistress Woolsey?" Her gentle tone prompted the treasurer into action and Woolsey escorted Arthur to the keep.

Kallian turned to her seneschal. "Varel, would you please make arrangements to notify Ser Tamra's family of her death? We can have her pyre here, if that's convenient for them. If she knew Cailan, she may have known Queen Anora. We should notify her of this."

"Yes, Commander. I don't think Ser Tamra had any family, but I will check our records and follow up."

"Thank you." Kallian stepped into the back of the wagon and knelt beside Anders and Ser Tamra, gently closing the knight's eyes. She was concerned about Anders; he appeared particularly upset.

Zevran appeared beside them, casting a glance at Ser Tamra. "What can you tell us?"

Anders wiped his hands on a handkerchief. "She was beaten and stabbed several times. Injuries include a punctured a lung, torn stomach, and blood loss. I'm not sure we could have prevented this, even if they'd found us sooner." He swore again and threw the bloodied handkerchief to the ground.

Kallian placed her hand on Anders' shoulder and gave it a squeeze. "Thank you, all of you, for trying. Help Zev look for anything she may have been hiding in her clothes or on her person, letters, a list of names, _anything_."

Zevran nodded. "We will need to keep her clothing, Anders. Fold it up, store it safely. Temmerly has scratches on his face, scrapes on his knuckles. Look for blood under her fingernails. Please report to us as soon as you can."

Kallian glanced around to find that Dorothy and the other women of the keep had gathered beside the wagon.

"We would like to offer our assistance preparing the good knight's body for her pyre."

"Thank you, Dorothy. I appreciate that. Wrap her in her cloak for now. I'd like our mages to examine Ser Tamra before you bathe her."

Anders took the lead and instructed Dorothy and the others on how to wrap and move the body. Kallian accepted Zevran's help climbing down from the wagon, sighing as he pulled her into an embrace.

"This is terrible. I'm certain she died because of this conspiracy against us, Zev." Her eyes followed the others as they carried Ser Tamra's body to the keep.

Zevran kissed her forehead. "And so we must do what we can to bring her killers to justice. Come, mia cara, let's get back inside. We should try to get some more sleep before too much more of the night passes. Varel, you can wrap this up, yes?"

"Of course, my lord. I will see to it that everyone retires or returns to their posts. I'll catch up with you both in a few hours." With a nod, he got to work.

Kallian let Zevran lead her back into the keep, the remaining Wardens following, and they all climbed to their chambers in silence. The group mumbled good night to one another and returned to their rooms. Kallian sank into a chair and pulled her feet up, wrapping herself in her cloak to stay warm; Zevran started a fire. She watched him crouch by the hearth, add kindling and logs to the brazier, pour water in the kettle they kept on the mantle, and pick through a basket of tea packets. He'd choose something to help her sleep, soothe her worried mind, of that she was certain. She was troubled, a woman had died a very unnecessary death tonight, but the memory of Zevran hitting Temmerly and stopping him in his tracks came to her and desire surged through her again. _We are alive, and we have this time together._ She stood, shed her cloak, and went to his side.

"I don't want tea, Zev."

Licking her lips, she dropped to her knees and pushed her hands into his hair, kissing him hungrily, pressing her body against his.

"I don't want any either, amore."

xXx

_13 Firstfall, 9:30_

_Ser Tamra's death affected all of us at Vigil's Keep; the day dawned cold, damp and gloomy to match our somber mood. Ser Derren and Lady Packton seemed genuinely shocked to hear of it, and of Ser Temmerly's arrest, so I feel confident neither of them knows anything of this conspiracy against me and the Wardens. They departed with their retinues as soon as possible. Poor Arthur recovered from his midnight adventure and returned home. Everyone seems of a mind to keep busy and so we practiced our training routines, opened the market, and went about the day's business. Varel reports Ser Tamra is survived by no one and so her funeral pyre is tomorrow at dawn. Zevran and I await Anders' report on Ser Tamra's condition upon death. Afterward, we will visit Ser Temmerly._

Kallian stood and stretched. Pulling her shawl around her shoulders, she put more logs on the fire and paced the length of the library and back to warm up. Winter was settling in and the keep was drafty, making warmer clothing, and more layers of it, a necessity. She wondered for a moment how Velanna was faring, as it seemed evident she was sleeping outside of the keep, but her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the library door swinging open.

"Have I ever told you I find tattoos on women incredibly attractive?" Anders asked as he held the door open.

"And I have ever told you that I find most humans physically and morally repulsive?" Velanna responded without missing a beat.

"Good to know!" Anders chuckled deeply, following Velanna and Petra into the room. "Good afternoon, Commander, Zev."

Anders closed the door and found a chair near the fire. He sat and stretched out, wiggled around in the chair until he was comfortable and then pulled Ser Pounce-a-Lot out of a pocket. He gave the kitten a scratch under the chin. Velanna's eyes opened wide.

"You keep that poor creature stuffed in your robes?"

"What? He likes it. Don't you, wittle Pouncie?" Ser Pounce mewed and rubbed his head against Anders' chin, purring loudly, before he jumped to the floor and ran to Lucius' side. The cat curled up against him, drawing a sigh from the hound.

Kallian sat at her desk and got ready to take notes. Zevran cleared his throat and addressed the three mages.

"Anything to report?"

Anders took on a far more serious demeanor, counting off injuries on his fingers. "Yes. As I said, Ser Tamra was punched, and more than once, I suspect. Fractured jaw, broken tooth, bruising on her jaw and around her neck. Tem..._someone_ throttled her." He paused to give Kallian time to write.

_Beaten, fractured jaw, broken tooth, throttled._ "Uh huh."

"She was stabbed four times. Once through her chest to puncture a lung, another to her stomach, two through her back. Those didn't hit any vital organs, but did cause damage to her spine and a rib." He sighed and turned away, causing Kallian to wonder once again what had happened between the two the night Ser Tamra had come to the keep to swear fealty.

"These…_men_ brutalized the woman, Commander." Velanna had managed to soften her tone and manner somewhat, but her emotions were so close to the surface she was anything but inscrutable. She folded her arms across her chest, fists clenched, and scowled.

"I think she did fight back, Commander." Anders returned to the conversation.

"How so?" _Maybe fought back._

Petra held up a phial with a small amount of something at the bottom. "As Zevran suspected, Ser Tamra had this under her fingernails. All of them. We've determined it's blood."

_Blood under all fingernails._ Kallian shifted her gaze from one mage to another and back to Zevran. "Temmerly has scratches on his face, his left cheek. I wonder if he has scratches anywhere else. His neck, perhaps? _Maybe_ under his sleeves on his forearms? We should ask Garevel to look him over, if he hasn't already. What about the scrapes to Temmerly's knuckles?"

"If he just punched her in the face, I do not think he would have scraped his knuckles," Zevran tapped a finger on his lips. "He would have had to hit something hard or abrasive to wound himself, agreed?"

Kallian nodded, making an affirmative sound in her throat, as she wrote more notes in her journal.

Zevran asked Anders about the accessories Ser Tamra was wearing.

"She had a large, ornate brooch holding her cloak in place, and a belt. I'll take a closer look at those."

"Good. Or maybe he pinned her against a tree, a wall, or even on the ground, and missed her." Zevran pointed to the phial in Petra's hands. "What about that?"

"If I knew how the Chantry uses blood to track mages, I might be able to figure out whose blood this is, but…" Anders waved a hand in the air. "I can't. She didn't have anything else with her, save a small coin purse and her jewelry. I don't know what else we can do at this point."

Silence descended upon the group and Kallian considered their options. Finally, she stood and paced in front of the fireplace.

"Okay. Write up a report, preserve everything you gathered from her in a safe location and Zevran will talk to Garevel about Temmerly. I'm going to hold him for a while, in case something else comes up. We will have a funeral for Ser Tamra tomorrow morning at sunrise. That's all for now."

As the three mages stood to leave, she reached out and tugged on Anders' sleeve. "Could you stay a few minutes?"

Nodding, he waved to Petra and Velanna, who slipped out of the library. Kallian watched Anders for a moment, until he raised an eyebrow at her.

"Are you okay? _Really_?"

"Yes, I'm…" She raised her eyebrow at him and he sighed and slouched back down into his chair. "No. I might be a bit of a cad where the ladies are concerned, but nothing happened between us that night. She…she just accepted me for what I was, wasn't…freaked out by the mage thing, and she _flirted_ with me. A knight, a noblewoman, flirting with _me_, the wanted apostate. Not to mention she was a clever, pretty woman who certainly did not deserve what she got. And I've never…that's the first time I've…lost a patient."

Kallian put her hand on his shoulder. "I'm so sorry, Anders. I wish there were more I could say or do."

He put his hand over hers and smiled sadly. "It's sweet of you to want to, Kallian. Thank you."

"Well, Zev needs to speak to Garevel and we've got things to do as well. Shall we?"

"Yes, of course." Anders stood and smoothed out his robes.

They collected their respective pets and walked to the main floor together, the two men falling into step beside Kallian.

"See you in the great hall at sundown?" Anders perched Ser Pounce-a-Lot on his shoulder.

"Roast boar with gravy and Ferelden pudding tonight," she replied with a wink.

"Maker bless Dorothy," Anders sighed as they parted ways.

xXx

14 Firstfall, 9:30

Ser Tamra's funeral pyre stood waiting in the pale early morning light. A solemn procession of guards carried her body from the keep down to the outer bailey to the mournful tolling of the guard house bell. Kallian was pleased every single member of the keep's community had turned out to pay their respects. Lord Eddelbrek, alerted to the knight's death by Arthur, his tenant, had arrived just before dawn and stood with Kallian and Zevran.

The guards placed Ser Tamra's body on the pyre with care, crossed their arms over their chests and bowed. As they formed a semi-circle around the pyre, Sister Magritte, whom Varel had summoned, stepped forward to recite sections of the Chant of Light. Kallian tried to keep her mind in the present, but Ser Temmerly's arrogance during questioning the day before kept coming back to her. He did have additional scratches at the back of his neck, but had a plausible explanation ready: he'd had…vigorous relations with a bar wench on the evening of Ser Tamra's death and hadn't seen the knight. They had no way of knowing if the name he gave them was real or how they would find the woman if she existed. Anders' examination of Tamra's accessories turned up nothing. Even with the evidence they did have, and the fact that the Wardens agreed the blood on both Tamra and Temmerly was not darkspawn blood, Temmerly pointed out bandits might have killed Ser Tamra just as easily as darkspawn. He and his men claimed they had been attacked by bandits, and he injured his knuckles in the fight. There was no solid evidence to support their statement, but Kallian had to admit nothing specific and irrefutable tied Temmerly to Tamra's death. She let her eyes wander to the fallen knight.

The clouds cleared and the sun crept further into the sky. A ray of sunshine inched toward Ser Tamra's head as Sister Magritte continued her recitations. Kallian thought the ladies had done a lovely job of cleaning the knight and arranging her hair, even if their efforts weren't visible now. They hadn't been able to find any cosmetics to cover the bruises on her face and neck, so they draped her head and shoulders with silk instead. As Kallian watched, a light breeze lifted the fabric and blew it back, revealing Ser Tamra's face. She appeared to be sleeping, so peaceful in spite of the violence of her death. The sun finally hit the knight's cheek and Kallian found herself staring. The bruise on Tamra's face was darker than the day before. _What is that?_ Her brow furrowed as her focus narrowed. Unable to contain her curiosity, and completely oblivious to her surroundings, she strode to the pyre, turning a log on its end so she could climb up to get a closer look at Tamra's jaw. Sister Magritte gasped and the startled crowd began to chatter.

"Maker's balls!" Kallian exclaimed. The Chantry sister's indignant exclamation at the profanity barely registered. "Zevran, Anders, get over here!" They were at her side quickly.

"What is it, tesora?" Zevran put a hand at the small of her back to keep her steady.

"Am I imagining things, or has that bruise," she pointed to Tamra's jaw, "gotten darker and more defined since yesterday?"

Anders leaned in closely and shook his head. "No, she's right. What is that?"

"Help me with this," she ordered, pulling the silk cowl from around the woman's neck.

Anders reached out and tugged at it so the three of them had an unobstructed view of Tamra's throat. The bruise there had darkened as well and in the unmistakable pattern of marks, a variation occurred part way along one finger, a mark that appeared to match the one on her jaw. At Zevran's sharp intake of breath, she knew she was onto something.

Kallian let out a happy yelp and turned to scan the crowd. "Garevel, get Temmerly up here, _now_." A ripple of curious excitement moved through the crowd as Garevel ran toward the keep.

"Lord Eddelbrek, if you would indulge me for a moment?"

He stepped forward with a bow. "My liege."

"May I see your signet ring?"

He held his hand out for her to examine while he scrutinized Ser Tamra's face. "By the Maker," he gasped, understanding dawned on his face.

"You see it too, don't you?" She knew the expression on her face was hardly appropriate for the occasion, but Eddelbrek was smiling, too.

"Andraste's frilly knickers," Anders breathed.

Sister Magritte looked as though she might faint and Kallian nearly burst out laughing.

"You'll forgive us soon enough, Sister."

Garevel returned at a quick pace with Temmerly in tow, the prison guards at his side, weapons drawn.

"Temmerly, give me your signet ring," Kallian demanded, holding out a hand.

He hesitated and Zevran grabbed his shackled wrists, removed the ring for him, and passed it to Kallian. It came off easily, a loose fit. She held it up and examined the pattern on it; a crest with raised twists of gold resembling ropes, and she reexamined Ser Tamra's face and neck.

"Now, tell me if I'm wrong," she said to those who stood closest to her, "but I think the hand that wore this ring hit Ser Tamra on the jaw, right there. And then, when it grabbed her throat to strangle her, the ring, being loose, had spun around its finger and made this mark."

After a moment's pause as they compared the ring to the marks, Zevran, Anders, Garevel and Lord Eddelbrek nodded their agreement.

"I am not so knowledgeable of such things, but is it safe to assume that no two families' signet rings would be the same?"

"That is correct, my lady," Eddelbrek confirmed. "A registry of the heraldry in Ferelden is kept in Denerim, but you needn't travel there to confirm anything. I find our history fascinating and am quite familiar with all the heraldry currently in use. I can tell you that you will not find another signet ring in all of Ferelden with this particular rope-like pattern on it. This belongs to the Temmerly line. Currently, this man is the only living heir of the line and would be, as far as I know, the only one to have this ring."

Kallian put her hand on Zevran's shoulder and hopped down from her perch, energized by this victory. "Temmerly, I think this is solid evidence that you did in fact beat and strangle Ser Tamra, or do you have a handy explanation for how your ring left not one, but two marks on her body when you claim you never saw her?"

When he didn't answer right away, and instead appeared stunned, she smiled. "I know your kind. You think you're privileged, above the law and untouchable, but you are not. No one is going to get you out of this, your co-conspirators will abandon you, and you will hang for murdering this woman."

She handed the signet ring to Zevran and raised a questioning eyebrow at him. He pulled Garevel aside.

"Captain, take him back to the prison, but keep him away from his men. Don't let them see each other at all. Now that we know they killed Ser Tamra, we might be able to get more information out of the other two."

Garevel motioned to the guards and they escorted Temmerly out of sight. Zevran gave Kallian a quick hug, an expression of pride on his face. The crowd of people who surrounded them began to cheer.

"Well done, mia moglie," he whispered into her ear.

Others nearby echoed his sentiments, and clapped her on the back. When the excitement had calmed, she apologized to Sister Magritte and asked her to continue Ser Tamra's funeral. As the morning grew brighter, the pyre was finally lit. Samuel, the groundskeeper, and several soldiers agreed to stay behind to tend to the fire while as the others began to return to their duties. Kallian and Zevran went to the throne room where their administrative team had gathered.

"Garevel, we will have to question Temmerly's men again, to see if they know anything of this conspiracy against Kallian and the Wardens. They should hang with him, but if they cooperate, perhaps she might be willing to consider other options, whatever they may be."

"Exile?" Kallian asked.

Zevran looked for Varel who would be able to provide counsel. He felt a tug on his arm as Kallian stopped walking, and he turned to look at her. She was pale, her face a study in deep sorrow, and her eyes seemed to be staring far into the distance.

"Kalli?" He stepped closer and put a hand to her cheek. Her eyes focused and shifted to his face.

"Kristoff."

He had seen that tortured expression before, in the last few days of their first journey to Vigil's Keep, when she had felt the loss of her Warden brothers coursing through her veins. There was no doubt in his mind that Kristoff was dead.

"We are going to the Blackmarsh then," he stated firmly. He would go with her and brook no arguments.

She nodded mutely, turning to see her Wardens approaching them. Velanna was too new to feel it, but Kallian knew by the expressions on their faces that the other four had.

"Our brother Kristoff is dead. We should try to recover his body, see if we can figure out what he was looking for. I will take a team of you and leave for the Blackmarsh as soon as possible. Ah…Anders, Nathaniel and Oghren. Mhairi, Velanna, I'll need Wardens here, too, just in case the darkspawn are up to new tricks."

Without a word, the men ran to their rooms to get ready. Kallian began calling for staff to help with packing provisions and arranged for Mistress Woolsey to purchase anything they didn't have on hand from the market. When she was certain there was nothing left for her to do but pack her own things, Kallian reached for Zevran's hand and they climbed to their chambers.

"So. We finally get to see this place they call Blackmarsh. Sounds like a lovely place." An involuntary shudder ran up Kallian's spine as she wondered what they would find there. _Maker, bless us all and keep us safe._

* * *

**A/N:** A silly chapter title, but I had to! A huge heap of chocolate covered gratitude goes out to my beta Mille Libri for getting Zevran more involved in this chapter. I made some revisions and hope I have't messed anything up! Thank yous to friends Zevgirl and Zute for their support and encouragement, and to all my other readers for sticking with me. I love hearing from you! Thank you for the reviews and comments; please send more. Cheers, Biff.


	15. Just Another Day

_Previously, on A Second Chance Awakenings…Ser Tamra was murdered, suspects were arrested and subsequently proven guilty, the keep hosted her funeral, and shortly thereafter, Kallian was overcome by the realization that Kristoff was dead. The group would have to depart for the Blackmarsh._

* * *

**Just Another Day**

18 Firstfall, 9:30

His mistress' mate kept his word, insisting they would both go to the Blackmarsh with Kallian and her Wardens. Nathaniel agreed to bring his mabari, Rosa, and they left shortly after the funeral pyre, as soon as they had their supplies and provisions gathered. Lucius smelled colder temperatures and snow on the wind, but milder weather favored them and it felt good to be out with the Wardens again. New sights and smells fascinated him, and he and Rosa enjoyed exploring their surroundings as they went. The mood of their companions was strange, however. No one said much, a sense of sadness emanated from the Wardens, and their behavior had changed. Anders, the tall one with the kitten, was far more subdued than normal, his smiles and cheerful tone gone. The short, smelly Oghren hadn't dropped any chunks of dried meat for Lucius or Rosa, and the lines around his eyes and mouth pulled in a different direction than usual. Kallian's typically light tone was soft and sad, and her face took on some of the characteristics Lucius associated with bad, unhappy things. Nathaniel didn't speak at all. They travelled three and a half days, pausing in the Wending Woods to eat with the dwarves and soldiers who had arrived to mine the granite, and then they carried on to this place, the Blackmarsh. It was gloomy, and dark magic bore down on them; it did nothing to improve anyone's mood.

After a good half day of searching through the Blackmarsh, the party stumbled upon a corpse in a small clearing, and Lucius knew they had found what Kallian had been dreading. She called the corpse Kristoff and Lucius understood her to say that the man had been dead for a few days, but by the scent of him, that didn't seem right to the hound. The body didn't smell dead enough and the lingering stench of darkspawn magic clung to it. Anders confirmed this, saying the corpse was enchanted; the body wasn't as decayed as it should be. Kallian and the others were so distracted by this discussion they didn't sense the small group of darkspawn approaching until they were surrounded. The leader, who called himself The First, spoke of killing Kristoff to lure the Wardens to this place, and Kallian's face contorted with anger. Suddenly, the First held out his hand and a flash of green light appeared. Zev, the Wardens, and The First fell to the ground, unconscious. The other darkspawn simply disappeared back into the trees, unconcerned about the two mabari left standing. Killing darkspawn was what the Wardens did, and Lucius was trained to help them with that goal, but his urge to pursue the enemy conflicted with his protective nature. Giving chase while his companions were so vulnerable was not an option. He owed his mistress his life; he would protect hers in return.

Lucius dropped his snout to his mistress' face and barked. She didn't react, didn't even twitch. She was breathing steadily; he could feel her breath on his nose. Her chest was rising and falling as it did when she slept, and she still smelled like one with child. These things provided some measure of comfort and he turned to check on Zevran and Oghren. Rosa mimicked his actions with Nathaniel, and then Anders. They met where the darkspawn had fallen beside the corpse and paused to survey the scene. Their companions appeared to be fine, as though they slept, and yet this hardly seemed to be the case. Lucius sat and growled softly. Rosa whined and settled beside him, her eyes scanning the forest around them for potential danger. She could see trees and ruins, no more. She sighed and nudged Lucius. There was nothing they could do but wait.

Lucius tipped his gaze to the skies. It was mid-afternoon now, and cooling down quickly. The clouds looked full of rain. His companions would get cold and wet. Kallian and Zevran had undressed in front of him often enough; he knew they wore additional clothing underneath their armor. They all did, but that never seemed enough. They also moved around quite a bit during the day and built fires to keep warm. He turned back to his companions. They had been huddled together when they first stopped by Kristoff's body, so they had fallen close to one another when The First attacked. Not trusting that this would keep them warm, Lucius stood and grunted at Rosa as he walked to Kallian and pushed his snout under her shoulder, trying to roll her toward Zevran. Rosa understood his intention and went to Kallian's hip. Between the two of them, they were able to roll the elven woman toward her mate. They shifted Zevran and the others until their companions were nearly spooned together. Lucius eyed the collection of back packs and sleeping rolls a few feet away. Letting out a low woof, he led Rosa to them. Freeing the furs and blankets from their bindings, the two dogs began dragging the bedding over the small grouping of bodies they had created. When they had covered everyone with an assortment of furs and blankets, Lucius and Rosa settled back to watch over them.

xXx

19 Firstfall, 9:30

Kallian's eyes flew open; Zevran stared back at her, blinking. They lay on their sides, facing one another. Lucius was pressed against her back, and she saw Nathaniel's bulk behind Zevran.

"Are you all right?" A sense of urgency to act, to keep moving, conflicted with a need to clear her mind and know everyone was okay. Being trapped in the fade was always a disconcerting experience.

"Si, amore," he nodded. His eyes searched her face as he slid his hand from her shoulder down her side to her hip, almost as if he were trying to convince himself she was really there. "And you?"

"I think I'm okay. Are we covered in blankets? Why are we covered in blankets?" Lucius got up and appeared at her head, nuzzling her ear. Kallian could hear Rosa further off, snuffling about. "Did you and Rosa do that? Good boy, Lucius. And people wonder why we like our mabari. Psh."

She breathed a sigh of relief before anger and indignation flared back up. _I'd have liked to kill that son of a bitch the First myself_, she thought as she closed her eyes again and took a moment to clear her mind. She felt fine, all things considered, and in that brief moment of silence she felt something in her belly, a slight tug of muscles and a fluttering not unlike nervousness. Petra had said she would notice the stretching of her muscles as the baby grew and her body adjusted to accommodate him. _This is a good thing, this is a good thing._ Kallian's next thought was of the fade spirit living within her. _Are you still there?_ A sense of calm came over her along with another faint shift in her belly. _What is that? _

Zevran extracted himself from their blankets and stood up. He stretched, his eyes and ears working to scan the area for potential dangers. It was as eerily silent as when they'd first arrived and the air around them felt thick and oppressive. He reached down to Kallian and helped her up, pulling her into an embrace. Kissing the top of her head, he looked around them. Dew covered everything and the sky was lighter along the horizon; he took it to be near dawn. _But of what day?_ The sound of men grumbling drew his attention to the rest of their companions and Zevran and Kallian burst out laughing in spite of themselves.

Oghren, Anders and Nathaniel were huddled together under a pile of furs and bedding. Indeed, far more closely than any of them ever would have allowed if they'd been awake. Anders tried to make light of the situation as they struggled to get out from under the blankets.

"Oghren, I know you're curious, but I wear smalls, just like everyone else. I never did when I lived in the Circle, of course, because you just never knew when you might have a chance with a woman. Or man for that matter, you couldn't afford to be picky. These days I must, though, because of the armor. It chafes, as I'm sure you know," he babbled.

"I'm warnin' you, Sparklefingers, if you don't stop talkin' right now, I'll shut you up myself," Oghren growled as he picked himself up off the ground.

"Fair enough."

"The dogs did this?" Nathaniel ignored the others' antics, looking around at their packs and bedding.

Kallian opened her mouth to reply, but the dogs started to growl and bark and her eyes followed the lines of their noses, stopping as she spied Kristoff's body. Any words she may have thought to speak in response died on her lips.

"Oh…ah…" was all she could manage as she raised an arm to point at the dead Warden.

The others stared at her for a moment before turning to see where she pointed.

"Andraste's frilly knickers!" Anders took several steps backwards, shock evident on his face. He gripped his staff, arms out at his sides ready to cast.

"By the stone, what is this?" Oghren drew his battle ax, his legs flexible and prepared for a fight.

Nathaniel and Zevran had also drawn their weapons, each man's face showing a measure of alarm and apprehension at this strange development.

"Kristoff?" Kallian squeaked when she found her voice again. She struggled to make sense of what she saw, only to find herself thinking this should hardly be shocking. She'd seen the walking dead aplenty in her travels; this was simply what one would look like if it was…fresh. The thought made her shudder.

The dead Warden was on his hands and knees, trying to stand. When he pushed himself up to his feet, he looked around, confusion evident in his expression.

"What…what is happening?" He ran his hands over his face and body, eyes continuing to scan the skies and horizon.

"Ju-huh…_Justice_?" Kallian had no idea what Kristoff sounded like, but she had definitely heard that voice before. It was the spirit they had tried to help in the Fade.

"No, this is the world of mortals, beyond the veil. And this, this is a mortal body of flesh. I am trapped within." Confusion turned to anguish.

Justice faced Kallian and the two stood staring at each other for what felt like an eternity before she spoke. "How…how did you get here?"

"The witch sundered the veil in her haste. All of us were drawn through. She has returned to this realm as well, can you not feel it? The baroness is nearby." Anger swelled in his voice.

"We defeated her once already…" she started with a false sense of bravado.

"You misunderstand," Justice cut in, stepping closer to her. "The baroness is not a mortal, as are you or as were the villagers she kept trapped. There was such a mortal once, but now? That is a demon of pride. She assumed that role long ago to feed on the people she trapped. But here, in your world, she will be quite something else."

Kallian felt ill. "This is a lot to digest. We were trapped in the fade by this Mother, you're suggesting we only managed to escape by _accident_, I'm talking to a spirit-possessed corpse, and now we're to track down and kill a pride demon and who knows what else, to clean up after this baroness. Just another day in the life of a Warden, eh?"

She had fought pride demons before, during the Blight. They possessed corpses to create revenants, or arcane horrors if the corpse was a mage, get inside your head and turn you against yourself, and they were not to be taken lightly. Senior Enchanter Uldred had been possessed by a pride demon, torturing and killing numerous mages, some of them children, and templars. Because of his actions, many other mages turned into abominations and ultimately died. He nearly condemned the Circle Tower to the Rite of Annulment. Shaking her head, she pushed memories of those days in the Tower out of her mind and focused on this latest development.

"So. A pride demon. That's just…_great_. What do you propose, then?" _Track it down and kill it, of course. Have I lost my mind?_ _This is all far too strange._

"The veil has been sundered and the tears must be closed lest they continue to spill demons into this world. I can alter your weapons for a time, allowing them to drive back the fade's magic, but if we are to deal with the baroness we must move swiftly."

Kallian took a quick look around at Zevran and their companions, and found them nodding in agreement, already checking their weapons and equipment.

"Okay. So, do I call you Kristoff?" She began checking her own weapons kit and handed her blades to Zevran to be sharpened.

"No. That poor soul is gone. I am Justice."

xXx

Tears in the veil closed, Anders insisted that they rest for at least two hours before pursuing the baroness. He argued he needed time to heal the injuries they had sustained or he would run the risk of being lyrium addled, and the others needed a break. Justice was highly motivated to see the baroness defeated and was against the idea of pausing for even a minute. Kallian settled the matter, ducking into a small house that still had most of its roof intact to set out her bedroll. Justice and Anders continued debating the matter, even so.

"You're _dead_, Justice. This pace you want to maintain is well and good for a _dead_ man," Anders complained as he healed Oghren's cracked rib, "but it isn't good for the rest of us."

Kallian was lying on her bedroll, staring at the stars through a hole in the roof holding an injury kit to her brow. She'd taken a glancing blow from a desire demon, but was otherwise unharmed. Another twinge in her belly reminded her she wanted to ask Anders about that very thing.

"Anders, I feel something in my stomach."

"You're hungry." He handed some injury packs to Nathaniel before turning to look at a gash on Zevran's thigh.

"Pfft. I ate not half an hour ago. This is different, like nervous energy or…I don't know, it's strange, and don't say it's the…ah…" Glancing at Justice, she frowned. "Because I know how that feels."

Casting a healing spell to knit Zevran's flesh together, Anders looked at her for a moment, and then gestured to her midsection. "How far along are you?"

Kallian paused to think on it. "Must be four months by now."

Anders smiled and began gathering his remaining potions and injury kits. "That, Commander, is your child moving, I'd wager. It'll get far more noticeable as you progress." He moved on to examine Nathaniel's injuries.

Kallian put a hand on the swell at her waist. _Could it be? Is that really my child?_ She marveled at the thought of it, and glanced up at Zevran. A thrill ran through her at the look of love and wonder she saw in his expression and she felt a surprising jolt of arousal as he put his hand next to hers, smoothing it over her belly.

"Tesora," he breathed, leaning down to kiss her. "Our bambino finally makes his presence known, eh?"

His warm breath on her lips sent a tingle through her body and a mad desire to have him then and there nearly overwhelmed her. He felt her body respond to his touch, heard her breath quicken, and chuckled.

"Marito," she whispered into his mouth. "I'm so…it's driving me crazy because this is clearly not a good time." Even as she spoke her hand was tugging at the buckles of his leather armor, and then her lips caught his in a kiss.

Zevran stilled her hand and pressed her palm to his lips, his eyes twinkling. "We must rest, mia moglie. We do not have much time."

She snorted as she rolled to her side, pulling Zevran's arm over her. "I swear, the first chance we get..."

Anders let out an exaggerated sigh from across the room where he was trying to get settled for a nap. "Have you two completely forgotten we're here, or do you just not care? Go to sleep, or I'll knock you out myself."

Grateful for some levity in an otherwise long and harrowing fight for survival, the others laughed to themselves as they tried to relax in preparation for the next battle. Justice took up watch.

xXx

When the baroness finally transformed into a pride demon, Kallian was shocked by the violence of it and the realization that she had forgotten what it was like to witness such a thing. The baroness gasped, choked, and doubled over in pain, grasping at her throat. Kallian watched, fixed to the spot with horror, as the demon took over, splitting and consuming its host's flesh and bone in a flash of light as part of the ritual to become a solid being. Where an arrogant woman had once stood, a pride demon now loomed over them. With barely a moment to spare, Kallian came to her senses and sidestepped the demon's first blow, slipping into the shadows to collect her thoughts. She scanned the courtyard of the baroness' mansion.

Oghren and Justice charged the demon and took up opposing positions, dodging around it while taking hard swings at its legs it in an effort to wear it down. Nathaniel and Zevran were working in tandem to keep a pair of revenants distracted. Zevran caught one with his blades and spun away before it could strike back, moving to the second. Nathaniel, meanwhile, had been peppering the second revenant with a hail of arrows. When Zevran shifted targets, so did Nathaniel. Anders stood along the far wall of the courtyard, a longsword in one hand, throwing a combination of spells in all directions. He enveloped his companions in arcane shields and shot sheets of ice at their enemies. It was the most effective spell to slow the demon down, but it looked as though it was going to be a long fight. Rosa and Lucius covered the entire group, alerting them to flanking attacks and engaging raised corpses and revenants when they could.

Drawing her bow, Kallian nocked an enchanted arrow. This particular variety would freeze the flesh of its target, the ice radiating out from the arrow as much as one foot. She aimed for the demon's eye, but shot too wide and reached for another arrow. Almost a moment too late, she realized that she had caught the demon's attention. It lunged at her and struck the ground with its fist, and the shock wave nearly knocked her over. She stumbled back, slipped into the shadows along the wall of the courtyard, and ran around behind the demon, stopping only when she knew its wrath had been diverted by one of her Wardens. Dagger and shortsword unsheathed, she waited for an opportune moment and when she saw it, ran at the demon, attacking from behind in a flurry of blades and tumbling motions. Several hits were critical, but they weren't enough. She leapt into the shadows and darted away to catch her breath. As she prepared for her next attack, she took in the field before her. Everyone had shifted slightly and the demon was no longer looking in her direction.

Kallian jumped up into the tree she was hiding behind, pulled herself onto the courtyard wall, and ran along it to the corner of the house. From there, she scaled the house to the roofline and crept along it until she was near enough to the demon that she could leap down onto its shoulders if she dared. She nocked another enchanted arrow and aimed for the demon's head. It lurched to its right, she adjusted and fired, it lurched back to its left. Her arrow struck its right arm, just below the shoulder. Justice and Oghren increased their efforts at the beast's legs while Anders sent a stream of ice at the thing's chest. Nathaniel and Zevran were otherwise occupied with the revenants that kept appearing. Kallian could tell the demon was finally weakening and exchanged her bow for a dagger and clutched it in both hands. Taking a few steps back up the roof, she ran to the edge and jumped onto the pride demon's back, digging in with her dagger. With her right hand, she tried to grab onto one of its scales to pull herself further up its body. The demon jumped up and crashed back to the earth in an attempt to divest itself of its opponents. Dangling from the demon's back as she was, trying not to fall to her death or a major injury at least, Kallian's left arm and shoulder bore the weight of her body and she felt a wrenching, blinding pain as her arm pulled free of its shoulder socket.

The next few seconds of her life flashed by in a blur of tumbling scenery and pain. Almost instantaneously, Anders froze the beast solid and with superb timing, Oghren and Justice swung at each leg, shattering the thing. Frozen blood and chunks of flesh flew everywhere and Kallian dropped to the ground. She landed on her feet and instinct took over. Kallian's habit was to crouch down, tuck into a ball and roll on her less dominant shoulder, while unsheathing a dagger with her dominant hand, a move she had used and practiced so many times it was second nature. She hit the ground, rolled over her left shoulder, and up onto one knee. Blackness closed in around the edges of Kallian's vision, pain lanced through her body, and it took every ounce of strength she had to stand without getting ill. She took several deep breaths to steady herself, and scanned the courtyard for the others.

Oghren was slapping Justice on the back and shouting to Anders that they should have a drink to celebrate; Nathaniel was collecting all the useable arrows he could spot as he walked back toward Anders, nursing a limp as he went. Zevran appeared at her side from out of the shadows, blood spattered but otherwise looking no worse for wear. He spotted her shoulder injury and waved Anders over.

"You are going to need this," he stated, pulling a potion from his belt. "Drink this, it will help ease the pain."

Kallian pulled the cork from the phial with her teeth, keeping her left arm at her side, which confirmed her shoulder was dislocated. From the look of it, Zevran took hers to be the most serious injury. The others could wait or tend to themselves.

Justice reached them before Anders and stood beside Kallian, staring down at the remains of the pride demon. "And so it is done. For what it is worth, thank you. I have fulfilled my vow. May the victims of that woman's madness rest in peace, wherever they have gone."

"What are you going to do now?" Kallian tried to ignore the pain in her shoulder. She could tell from the look on Anders' face that putting it to rights wasn't going to be pleasant.

The spirit-possessed corpse looked at the scenery, such as it was. "I cannot return to the fade. I am trapped here, in the body of this…Grey Warden? There are memories within this poor man's mind. They are difficult to see, but…he was a Grey Warden and he was slain by the darkspawn, by the one called The First?"

"Yes. The darkspawn are what we Grey Wardens fight."

"It seems I am at a loss. I know nothing of this world and have only a few memories of this Grey Warden to draw from. I do not wish to die. What shall I do, mortal? You seem to be a creature of good character and you are of this world. Would you advise me?"

"Join me," Kallian blurted out, the pain in her shoulder becoming more unbearable with every passing second. She couldn't think of anything else to say or do for Justice, and she needed Anders to fix her arm. "The body you inhabit belonged to a Grey Warden."

There were some noises of concern from the men gathered around her, but she didn't hear any outright objections. Zevran's hand, resting at the small of her back, remained perfectly still; if he had any reservations, he was keeping them to himself.

"You mean continue this mortal's mission? As a Grey Warden? It was a darkspawn who murdered this mortal most ignobly and the ones that commanded it yet live. To avenge his death…yes, that would be a purpose. Very well, I will join you, Grey Warden, if you will allow it."

Kallian thought of how well Justice had fought with them, both in the fade and the Blackmarsh; he was a skilled warrior and would make a valuable addition to the team. She wondered how long Kristoff's body would last and what they could possibly do to preserve it. _I cannot leave him here, alone in this strange world, to fend for himself. Maker's breath, who has to deal with this sort of thing?_

"Yes, of course." She nodded and the movement sent a wave of pain through her arm, making her cry out.

"Enough." Anders put his hand on Kallian's right arm. "You've got a dislocated shoulder and we need to fix it. Now."

Kallian tried not to whimper. "So fix it."

"Um…Well, here's the thing. I have to actually shove your arm back into the socket, Commander. There's a bit of a trick to it, if I don't want to cause any more damage, and it will be incredibly painful. I think for your sake, I should knock you out."

"No, just give me a glove or something…"

Anders looked Kallian directly in the eye. "Why must you be so stubborn about this? You will not wake up in your smalls on a boat bound for the Free Marches, I swear it on an unabridged version of the Chant of Light. Let me put you to sleep, Commander, it will be much easier for both of us."

Zevran slipped his arm around her waist. "It is a matter of trust, yes? You trust us, so trust that we will protect you from that which you fear, mia cara. This is for the best, believe me. I have been on the rack, you know, and had to reset my shoulder on my own. Having a mage who can make you sleep through it is a blessing."

Kallian knew he was right. She did trust her companions, had to trust them.

"Okay."

Anders took her hand in his. "It'll be fine, I promise." She tasted apples, a sensation that always came over her when Anders cast spells on her, and fell into Zevran's arms, asleep.

xXx

When she next opened her eyes, Kallian found herself on a bed of blankets and furs on the floor of a room she didn't recognize. A fire was burning in the hearth nearby and several candles stood around the room. Anders was binding her left arm to her torso with a linen wrap.

"See? Still in Ferelden. How are you feeling?" he asked, tucking the ends of the wrap under the knot he had made.

"Better, I think. Where are we?"

Anders put his wrist to her forehead for a moment and, satisfied that she wasn't running a fever, settled back to look around them. "The baroness' house. I was ready to set up in one of the huts outside the courtyard, but Nate and Zevran thought this might be nicer. I have to agree. The place is in remarkable shape, for a building that's been left to rot for decades."

He nodded toward a small phial by her pack. "That potion should alleviate any discomfort you might have. Your shoulder is back in place, and your circulation is good, but it's going to be pretty tender for a few days, so the binding is to keep you from using it or moving it around too much."

"Thank you, Anders. Where are the others?"

"Nate, Zev and the dogs are snooping around to see if there's anything worth looting. I've got Justice and Oghren clearing some room in the library down the hall for the rest of us. We'll get a fire going, have something to eat, hunker down for the night and head out of here tomorrow."

"Should we be spread out? What if more of those…childer things…" She started to sit up, realized she wasn't wearing anything but her smalls and breast band, and pulled her blanket back up to cover her chest. "Ah, I'm still in Ferelden, but I'm in my smalls."

Anders smiled. "It was necessary. Your clothes were filthy. Don't worry, it's nothing I haven't seen before and Zev did most of the undressing. As for the accommodations, the place is secured and I think we're good. Besides, the rest of us wouldn't get much sleep with the two of you pawing at each other all night long, so a separate room is a good thing."

Kallian could feel her cheeks flushing. "Um…sorry?"

"No you're not." Anders laughed. "Besides, you're lucky to have each other, after all you've been through."

His expression was wistful and she wondered if he was lonely, but before Kallian could ask, Zevran and Nathaniel appeared at the door. Kallian met Zevran's gaze and was immediately grateful for Anders' consideration. Desire coursed through her. Trying to maintain some sense of dignity in the presence of others, she nodded to the box he held in his hands.

"What have you got there?"

"My good friend Nate and I have been out and about learning a valuable lesson about death and the accumulation of wealth, one our baroness missed if she ever attended Chantry sermons. This," he shook the box slightly, "is but a portion of her collection of precious gemstones. These are cut and raw rubies, emeralds, diamonds, and sapphires, and there is another box of jewelry, all likely to be worth a bit of gold."

Nathaniel offered a rare smile. "We also found a small chest with what looks to be a few hundred sovereign at least."

Kallian let out a low whistle. "That makes some of what we've had to endure here worthwhile, don't you think? Can we carry it all back to the keep?"

"I think we can figure something out. I saw a wheelbarrow and a few small carts in the shed around back. There isn't much more of value here, other than some ale we've pilfered for dinner. Almost everything else has either rusted or disintegrated."

Anders hopped up onto his feet. "Well, how about we get something to eat and then turn in for the night. I think we've all due a decent night's sleep." He ushered Nathaniel out of the room and pulled the door closed behind him, winking at Kallian as they disappeared.

Zevran went to Kallian's side and helped her up. "Come, amore, we will feast on –"

Kallian cut him off, wrapping her good arm around his neck and assaulting his mouth. "I told you, first chance I got…"

"Ah, you little minx. We must be careful not to aggravate your injury."

"Pfft. Lie down, I'll show you careful." They walked backwards, to their bed, Kallian's fingers pulling at Zevran's leggings as they went. "Clothes off."

"Si, mia signora e padrona," he replied.

Tunic, leggings, smalls and breast band hit the floor in quick succession and Zevran and Kallian finally stood naked before each other. Zevran realized it had been a few days since they had been able to do this, and he was determined not to rush himself. He pulled Kallian close, capturing her mouth in a passionate kiss, his hands roaming her body. His manhood swelled between them, pressed against her groin, and she moaned. It was a low, throaty sound that made him shiver with desire. Zevran slid a hand down her thigh and brought it back up between her legs to find her damp and aroused. Kallian rocked her hips against him, whimpering into his mouth. The realization that he had come to losing her and their child several times in just a few days hit him and threatened his resolve to go slowly.

Sinking to his knees before her, Zevran pressed kisses to Kallian's belly, his hands continuing to explore every inch of her body, fingers teasing her sex. He marveled at the idea that their child might actually be moving around inside her, that they had created life and would be parents in less than half a year.

"Tesora," he whispered hoarsely. "Promise me you will never endanger yourself as you did today. I…could not bear to lose you and our bambino."

He didn't care that his eyes were damp, this woman meant more to him than he could have imagined. He was a realistic man, he knew that any number of things could part them, but if it was within his control to extend their time together, he would do it.

She dropped to her knees, tears rolling down her cheeks. Zevran was good at keeping his emotions hidden unless his feelings for her were involved. Normally a cause for concern, should they cloud his judgment or distract him in battle, seeing them so close to the surface was a potent reminder of how deeply he loved her.

"I promise, marito, no more unnecessary risks." She threaded her fingers into his hair, pulling his mouth to hers.

Zevran sat and held Kallian in his lap, kissing and nipping at her neck and the sensitive flesh along her collarbone. She rocked against Zevran, impatient to feel him deep within her, and finally impaled herself on him.

Kallian gasped and threw her head back, losing herself in the steady motion of their bodies. Tilting her pelvis back and forth to increase the friction between them, she licked the edges of his ears and sucked at their tips, drawing from him a series of groans that drove her passion to its limits. It was eventually too much for them and they rose to their climax together, bodies tingling and shuddering with the flood of sensation that overcame them. They stayed together that way for several minutes, holding each other as their breathing slowed, until exhaustion took over and they were forced to sleep.

xXx

23 Firstfall, 9:30

Anders compared their return journey to Vigil's Keep to a walk in the park. The weather was reasonable, never raining too much, and enemies of the darkspawn variety were nowhere to be seen. The companions were set upon by a small group of bandits as they approached the Wending Woods, but they quickly killed the men and continued on their way. As luck would have it, they met a wagon of granite blocks bound for the keep and were able to store their packs on the wagon, occasionally taking breaks from the walk by riding in it. When they arrived at the keep to find a large crowd waiting to receive them, Kallian didn't feel any anxiety and she happily paused to greet numerous people as they made their way to the inner bailey.

Her smile froze in place when she laid eyes on Varel, however, and a sense of foreboding stirred in the pit of her stomach at the sight of the people with him. Leliana, Ignacio and Cesar stood close to him, their faces grave. Leliana was always a welcome sight, but Kallian took her presence to mean some form of progress in the investigation into the conspiracy against the Wardens. Ignacio and Cesar presented an entirely different set of concerns, the least of which would be Zevran's reaction. Casting a glance at her husband, she saw his jaw was clenched.

Looking up at the commotion that approached them, Leliana smiled and met her friend with a hug and kiss on the cheek. "Kallian, mon amie! Oh, you smell of the road and I have just the thing for you, some lovely soaps from the Denerim market."

"It is good to see you, Leli. Our home is yours, as always." She took a small, sweet smelling bag from Leliana and turned to greet the others.

Ignacio stepped forward and bowed deeply, taking Kallian's hand in his. "Commander, how good it is to see you again. I have heard an interesting story about you," he said, his eyes seeking hers. His meaning was not lost on Kallian; Ignacio was aware of a contract against her.

"Ignacio, Cesar, welcome to Vigil's Keep. We have just returned from a long and arduous journey and are in desperate need of a bath. I hope you won't mind if we take care of that before sitting down for the evening meal. I trust you will eat with us?"

"But of course, Commander. Nothing would please me more."

"Varel, if you wouldn't mind accompanying us?" Kallian linked her arm through Zevran's as they continued on into the keep's main hall.

"Commander, there is much we must discuss, but all in good time. I imagine you are exhausted. As you may have surmised, your friends come bearing news of the conspiracy. For now, refresh yourselves, and we can speak at supper."

"Thank you, Varel. We'll be a few hours."

Zevran and Kallian continued to their suite in silence, her hand gripping his. When they were finally alone and running a bath, she pulled him into an embrace. Whatever was coming, she took comfort in the fact that she would not be alone.

* * *

_**A/N:**__ Maker, it's been over three weeks since I posted the last chapter. My thanks to everyone for reading, especially my pals Zevgirl and Zute, and other recent reviewers Kainen-no-Kitsune, rukialover174, and GlassxCandy. Last, but certainly not least, my beta, Mille Libri, whose input is invaluable. Please do comment/review, you know I love to hear from you. _

_FYI, if you haven't already seen it, I've added a chapter to my OutTakes series. Cheers!_

_Tesora – treasure; marito – husband; mia moglie – my wife_


	16. This Old Argument

_Previously...Kallian and her Wardens, along with Zevran and the mabari, went to the Blackmarsh to discover what, exactly, had happened to Kristoff. There, they encountered numerous foes, found Kristoff's body and were sucked into the fade at the behest of a new enemy, the Mother. They should have died while they were stuck in the fade, but by chance they were brought back to the Blackmarsh by the baroness. Justice, a spirit they encountered in the fade, was also brought to the mortal world and he possessed Kristoff's body. Cleaning up the mess the baroness had created took some time and Kallian's shoulder was dislocated in a fight against a pride demon, so the gang spent the night in the baroness' mansion and helped themselves to her treasures. A sense of order restored to the area, they returned to Vigil's Keep. Awaiting them - some old...friends, of a sort, from Denerim._

**This Old Argument**

23 Firstfall, 9:30

Ignacio's presence at Vigil's Keep set Zevran on edge. Ignacio was a Crow Master and a slimy bastard, and the way he looked at Kallian made Zevran want to kill him on the spot. Instead, Zevran channeled his frustration into a more pleasant diversion, making love to Kallian twice as they bathed and prepared for dinner. There was no give and take; he wanted to possess her, hear her shout out his name and beg him for more, know she was his, and that he was the only one who saw her this way. He knew it was Antivan machismo, foolishness really, but it had the effect he hoped for. Thoughts of Ignacio vanished, and Zevran took great pleasure in bringing Kallian to orgasm several times before he allowed himself to follow her over the edge. He left her breathless and weak-kneed on their bed and went to their wardrobe to pull on a pair of dark woolen trews, a long sleeved shirt, thick socks and leather boots. He decided not to re-braid his hair. Lately, the smallest thing could set Kallian's passions afire and she seemed to find him that much more attractive with his hair down. The thought that he might be able to keep her in a state of arousal through the evening meal pleased him.

Kallian watched him Zevran for a few minutes before getting up to wash and dress herself. She knew he was not happy about having members of the Crows at the keep. Her association with Ignacio was one of the few things they argued over. Zevran didn't like the way Ignacio acted toward her, either, and she suspected that he'd left her marked with love bites on purpose. She pulled on a white linen under dress with long sleeves and over it, a dark green woolen dress with a low neckline and off-the-shoulder sleeves with slashes to show the white underneath. It clung to her figure, making the swell of her belly more noticeable and she smiled at her reflection in the mirror. Arranging her hair in a loose braid down her back, she reached for a shawl and turned to find Zevran watching her.

"Yes?" Even though she was sore and bruised from their lovemaking, the sight of him with his hair hanging loose made her pulse quicken.

He didn't miss the flush that rose from her breast. "You are lovely."

"Flatterer." Kallian walked to his side, laughing as he caught her around the waist and pulled her closer, smoothing his hand over her abdomen. "Not that I'm complaining, because I did enjoy myself very much, but I wonder if you're perhaps feeling a bit...territorial? possessive?" When Zevran sighed, she brought her hand up to cup his cheek. "Why? You have nothing to worry about, let it..."

"Nothing to worry about?" he interrupted, releasing her and stepping back. "Let it go, you say? We have _Crows _in our house. The same Crows who tried to kill you and who want me dead. You cannot trust..." He stopped himself and held up a hand.

"I am sorry, I do not want to ruin the evening with this old argument. Let us hope you are right, that I have nothing to worry about, and that they leave quickly."

She hugged him tightly. "Yes, marito. May we go eat now? Your son and I are famished."

He growled and drew a gasp of delight from her by sucking on the tip of her ear as he steered her toward the door. "After you."

xXx

Anders joined Kallian and Zevran in the hallway and smirked at the sight of Kallian's neck.

"Do you want me to...?" He pointed at a small bruise at the base of her throat.

"No, thank you, Anders." She pulled her shawl around her shoulders, barely managing to conceal the offending mark with folds of fabric.

"Right, now you look somewhat respectable." He laughed and stepped to the side as she tried to smack him.

"Oh, you may want to know that Justice attracted a bit of attention, but I managed to get him squared away before too many people who might have known Kristoff saw him. He's in the room at the end of the hall, past the nursery. I figured he should probably stay out of sight until we can explain what's going on, and I talked to Varel about the situation."

Kallian looked over her shoulder toward the end of the hall. "Maker's balls, that was a serious oversight on my part. Thank you, Anders. How is Justice?"

Anders shrugged. "Hard to say. A word of advice, don't get into a conversation with him about the injustices you've suffered, or, Maker forbid, inflicted upon others. One smart mouthed comment about the Circle Tower got me into a half hour discussion with him about how I should seek justice against my oppressors. I don't disagree with him, but he's...a bit extreme." His face broke into a wide smile. "Ooh, may I introduce him to Velanna and her sordid history? _Please?_"

"Don't you _dare _start anything," Kallian scolded.

As they entered the great hall, the smells of roasted fowl and vegetables assaulted their senses and the clamour of a fair number of people greeted them. Kallian looked around the hall and noticed that Ignacio and Cesar were seated with the other merchants. Breathing a sigh of relief, she took Zevran's hand in hers. As they walked to the high table, a voice called out.

"Andy! Andy!" Myriani's two-year-old toddler, Talindra, escaped from her mother's side at the merchants' table and ran toward the mage as fast as her young legs could carry her, locks of brown hair falling into her eyes.

She toppled onto her hands and knees at Anders' feet and her face pinched up as though she might cry, but he crouched down and held his hand out in front of her face before she could make a sound.

"Sparklefingers?" he asked, waggling his fingers at her.

Talindra sat back on her heels, her hazel eyes wide and bright, the pain of falling already a distant memory. "Sparks!"

Tiny blue sparks danced around on Anders' fingertips and the little girl shrieked with laughter and clapped her hands. "Up, please." She held her arms out to Anders.

"Don't you think your mother will be worried about you, little one?" he asked as he picked her up and tickled her ribs, pulling more laughter from her.

Myriani appeared at his side, blushing. "My lady, I am so sorry..."

"Nonsense, Myriani, it's fine."

Kallian couldn't help but notice the look on the elven woman's face as she watched Anders amuse her daughter. He had conjured up a spell wisp and made it change colors as it circled them. Talindra leaned back to watch the wisp, completely entranced.

"Say goodbye to the wisp," Anders instructed her after the wisp had done several rotations.

"'Bye, bye!"

The wisp disappeared and Anders juggled the little girl in his arms until she was facing her mother. "Here you go, I think this one's yours."

Kallian nudged Zevran toward the high table as Anders and Myriani chatted about Talindra's latest tooth. She waved and said hello to the others seated along the high table, and took her chair at the center.

Leaning over to whisper to Zevran, she asked, "Do you think Anders likes Myriani?"

"I think it is safe to say so. The opposite is certainly true, as I am sure you have noticed," he replied with a smile.

"Hmm. I think he could use some companionship." Her eyes followed Anders as he walked with Myriani and Talindra to sit with them and the other merchants. "It bodes well that he gets along with Talindra."

"You are thinking of intervening?"

"Encouraging, marito, _encouraging_."

Leliana slid into the seat on Kallian's right and kissed her cheek, her eyes wandering from Kallian's neck to her belly. "You look lovely, ma cherie. Pregnancy and Zevran agree with you, non?"

"Yes," Kallian laughed. "Yes on both accounts." She put her hand atop Zevran's where it lay on the table next to her. "I have been feeling the baby move over the last few days. Anders says we should be able to feel it from the outside in another month or so."

"Oh, that is wonderful," Leliana cooed, hugging Kallian and reaching out to give Zevran's arm a squeeze. "I am so happy you are doing well! Have you thought of a name yet? Do you have a nursery set up?" She continued to ask a string of questions about the pregnancy, barely giving Kallian time to answer one before moving on to the next.

As the servants appeared with jugs of ale and wine, the conversation turned to the Wardens' latest adventure and the windfall they had found. The clamor in the room swung from sounds of conversation to those of food and drink being served and consumed with great gusto. The roaring fire cast a warm glow across the great hall, the meal was delicious, and the mood light. Later, as the tables were cleared, some members of the guard brought out their musical instruments and convinced Leliana to sing a few songs while Kallian and Zevran retired to the library with Varel and Mistress Woolsey.

The room was a warm and welcome relief from the cool hallways; a fire and numerous candles were blazing, and the servants had set out wine, ale, and water. Varel handed Kallian a package as he and Woolsey helped themselves to a drink and sat down. Kallian sat at her desk and opened the parcel. It was a slab of dark chocolate and a box filled with packets of Antivan spiced tea, with a note from Ignacio thanking her for her hospitality. Zevran sniffed at both items and tested a small piece of the chocolate before deciding nothing had been poisoned. Kallian rolled her eyes.

"It would be a pretty bold move to give our seneschal poisoned gifts to deliver to me, don't you think?"

"I think I will be happy to see the backs of Ignacio and Cesar. Let us find out what it is they want and hope they will be on their way quickly."

Kallian sighed and turned to Varel and Woolsey. "Before we get into that matter, I should apologize for not telling you about Kristoff myself."

"It certainly was a lot to take in. I think I can honestly say I've seen and heard it all now." Varel shook his head. "Oh, Maker's breath. Aura, Kristoff's wife, is coming to Amaranthine."

Kallian nodded. "When we checked his room, we found a letter she'd written. She must be in the city by now, maybe even on her way here. Ugh. I am not looking forward to that conversation. Mistress Woolsey, I'd like to give her something, Kristoff's stipend, perhaps? Something to help her get set up to be on her own, or return to Orlais."

Woolsey nodded. "Nathaniel gave me the money and jewels you took from the baroness's mansion. The money amounted to just over three hundred fifty sovereign. What would you like me to do with it?"

"Give each Warden one rough stone and one cut stone, to do with as they please. I like emeralds." She grinned. "Sell the remaining gems to our merchants at a fair price so they have room for profit. As for the money, add it to the treasury and see to it that funds are put toward the fortification of the keep, raw materials for our smithy, and equipment for the keep's guard."

"Very well, Commander."

Kallian turned to Varel. "I will hear it from them as well, but please tell me what you can about Ignacio and Cesar. Do you know what they want?"

Varel nodded. "It seems this Cesar is Lillith's Antivan connection, and they are here on business, but they claim to have news for you and Zevran as well. I gather that is not necessarily a good thing?"

Kallian didn't have to see Zevran to know he disturbed by this news. He had been the one to tell her the previous week that Lillith knew a merchant from Antiva. Clearly, it had not occurred to him that this connection might be Cesar. _Why would it? Of all the people in all of Thedas_, she thought as she spared a glance in Zevran's direction. His face was smooth, save for a slight pinching around his mouth, but he had crossed his arms over his chest and she could see the tension in his stiffened posture.

"No, not necessarily. I suspect Ignacio may be aware of a contract against me."

"A contract?"

"With the Antivan Crows, most likely."

"Oh, I see." Varel paled slightly.

"My husband disagrees, but I trust Ignacio enough to be on my side of this conflict, if there is one. I'm not saying we shouldn't be cautious when dealing with him, however," she added as Zevran made to speak up. If the other two hadn't picked up on it already, it must have become clear that this was a source of tension between Zevran and Kallian.

There was a knock at the door and Varel stood to answer it. Leliana, Nathaniel, Anders, and Ignacio all filed into the room. Kallian stood and greeted everyone, offering them beverages. Once everyone was settled and the fire had been stoked, she took her seat and asked Leliana for an update.

Leliana stood and walked around the group as she spoke. "The Chantry called me to Denerim to meet with Brother Genitivi and while I was there, I happened to spot Lord Guy in the market. I overheard him asking where the two Antivan merchants were, and of course at this time there are only two, Cesar and Ignacio. I investigated, specifically with Alistair and Anora, and learned Lord Guy has no official business in Denerim or any familial ties there." She paused at Kallian's desk and perched on the corner.

"The city is not at its best, it is still recovering from the Blight, so while a simple visit for the sake of visiting might be possible, it seems unlikely. The City of Amaranthine and Vigil's Keep both have very good markets, stocked with popular Antivan products, so why bypass both to come all the way to Denerim to shop for such things? I suspected your Lord Guy was looking to hire a Crow assassin. Given how friendly he appeared to be with Bann Esmerelle, I am convinced that they are working together."

Kallian leaned back in her chair with a sigh. "But we still have no proof?"

Ignacio slid forward in his chair. "No, but I spoke to the man."

Zevran stepped forward, his eyes dark with anger. "And what exactly did you discuss with him?"

"Lord Guy was looking to hire an assassin, that much he made clear." Ignacio's tone carried a hint of their mutual distaste for one another, but he was nothing if not a poised individual. "Rest assured no Crow in Ferelden wishes to harm your Warden. Indeed, he would be very hard pressed to find _any _Crow who would do such a thing."

There was slight a change in the master's attitude as he turned his attention back to Kallian; his smile reached his eyes now, his tone was far more pleasant.

"This Lord Guy was still in Denerim when we left yesterday morning. I am sure if you keep an eye on him, you will discover something useful."

"Thank you, Ignacio, for the information, and the chocolate and tea. You have accommodations for the evening?"

"Yes, Mistress Woolsey has been kind enough to give us some rooms. We must be off to the city in the morning, however, as we are headed back to Antiva to restock. I wonder if I could speak with you and your husband privately before you retire?"

Kallian's eyes drifted to Zevran, gauging his reaction. _Nothing's changed, then_, she thought as she saw his lips press together ever so slightly. "Yes, of course. Varel, Mistress Woolsey, if there is nothing that cannot wait until morning, I think that's all for this evening."

"Indeed, nothing that cannot wait, Commander," Varel replied. He stood and bade the others good night before offering his arm to Woolsey, leading her out of the library.

"Nathaniel, Anders, I'd like a meeting with the entire team tomorrow. We need to catch up and figure out where we go from here. You, too, Leliana."

"Of course, mon amie." She went to Kallian's side to give her a kiss on the cheek before following Nathaniel out of the room.

Anders paused at the door. "Try to get to bed soon, Commander, and check in with Petra tomorrow. You and your little one have been through a lot this past week."

"I will, thank you. _Mother_."

Anders laughed and was gone, closing the door behind him. Kallian and Zevran sat in awkward silence with their Antivan guest for a minute. Kallian cleared her throat at last and raised an eyebrow at Ignacio.

"What did you wish to discuss?

The Crow master smiled, casting a sideways glance at Zevran. "A gentleman named Nuncio. You remember him, Zevran?"

Zevran stepped out of the shadows behind her and sat on Kallian's desk. "What of him?"

"Few people are interested in pursuing you and making an example out of you. Leaving the Crows simply isn't done, but one must...choose one's battles wisely. Nuncio, however, is not so willing to let some things lie. He was rather fond of Taliesin and I have heard that he spends his spare time plotting revenge against you, Zevran."

"What? Zevran, what is this? Who is Nuncio?" Kallian stood and circled her desk to stand before him.

"He is no one of importance." Subtleties in his body language told her a different story and Ignacio confirmed Kallian's suspicions.

"I would not say that, Zevran," the Crow master cautioned. "My lady, Nuncio was Taliesin's lover. He is not without resources, financial and otherwise, and can be incredibly single minded at times. My sources say he is prepared to track your husband down and kill him to avenge Taliesin's death. I suspect it will be many months before he could possibly leave Antiva, but out of respect for you, my lady, I thought you should know about this."

"And what do you hope to get in return for this information, Ignacio?" Zevran stood by Kallian's side, his hand at the small of her back.

Ignacio stood as well. "Zevran, you misjudge me. I enjoy my current association with our lady arlessa and have no desire to see it change. It could be bad for business, and perhaps cruel of me, if I did not tell her of this information, yes?" He turned to Kallian and took her hand in his, bowing to kiss it.

"Thank you for your kindness and hospitality, my lady. Good night."

"Good night," Kallian replied as he turned and left the library. It irked her that in spite of how the two men felt towards one another, Ignacio could be pleasant and cordial, but the same could not be said of Zevran.

He was pacing back and forth in front of the fireplace, frustration and anger evident in his every move. Kallian took a small piece of chocolate and popped it into her mouth before she put the rest of it into a desk drawer along with the tea. Sighing as the chocolate melted and spread across her tongue, she allowed herself this indulgence before she turned to face Zevran.

"Should we be worried about Nuncio?" She certainly was. She hated to admit it, but she had fallen into a false sense of security. Even if the Crows held no grudge against her, she should have realized that wouldn't necessarily protect Zevran. Nuncio might even come after her and their son in order to get to him. _Zevran has surely thought of this already... _She suddenly found herself quite angry at this Nuncio and the fact that she could do nothing about it.

Zevran stopped pacing and fixed his gaze on the fire. "I barely knew the man, but we should be wary, yes." He looked up at her as she joined him. "I was foolish to think it possible that no one would ever come for me."

Kallian could sense his turmoil and she slipped her arms around him, looking up into his amber eyes, hoping she looked more confident than she felt. "Zev, don't beat yourself up over this. We are forewarned, we will be ready for Nuncio."

He nodded, but the idea that she and his son might be in danger because of him fueled the anger and frustration he was feeling. There was nothing to be done about it, though. Like it or not, they were in business with Ignacio and Cesar, a Crow was waging a vendetta against him, and, for the moment at least, both situations were beyond his control.

Kallian watched his face, knowing with every fiber of her being that he likely was blaming himself for this situation or trying to think of a way to resolve it, and she was suddenly struck by the thought that he might leave the keep to protect her and their son. It shook her to the core and threatened to strip away the calm facade she was trying to maintain, and her desire to be one with him became urgent. She threaded her fingers into his hair, pulling his lips to hers.

"Promise me…promise you won't leave us, Zev."

He didn't know that he could promise such a thing and keep his word, but he couldn't imagine leaving her and their son for any reason. As her scent and visions of their earlier couplings flooded Zevran's senses, he nodded. Pressing her against the wall, he held her there while his tongue battled with hers. His own hands wandered over her body and up into her hair, and he could feel himself hardening. They were both panting, needing more. He wanted to see her spread out before him, to press her naked body to his, and he started walking them toward the door.

"Mmph...want...you...now..." Kallian's fingers slipped under the waistband of his trews, brushing against his erection. "Can't wait." She slid the lock home and pushed him back toward the fireplace, onto the fur spread out in front of it.

"Kalli, tesora," Zevran murmured between the kisses she was so fervently pressing to his mouth and face. "I was selfish with you earlier, and I..."

She pulled back and shook her head, her eyes searching his. "Perhaps, if you think so, but I must admit I rather liked how you just..._took_ me. I knew what you were about. It was Ignacio, wasn't it?" He nodded. "I think this Nuncio is my Ignacio, Zev. I need you now like you needed me then."

Kallian dropped to her knees, pulling his trews and smalls down as she went, and took his cock in her mouth. He groaned, knees nearly failing him as she opened her throat to accept his full length. Zevran delighted in watching her as she cupped his balls in her hands and continued to suck and lick him. She drew her tongue up and down the shaft, swirled it around the tip, and took him deep into her throat again and again, until it became too much for him. The pressure that had been building in Zevran's groin released and waves of intense pleasure flowed through him until he could no longer stand on his own two feet. He collapsed onto the fur beside Kallian and looked up to see her grinning at him wickedly, licking his seed from her lips.

"I hope you can keep up, marito," she whispered hoarsely as she removed his boots and socks.

Standing, she kicked off her own shoes and began to undress. Zevran watched with pleasure as she slowly pulled her dresses up over her head and tossed them onto the couch. Looking him in the eye with a mischievous grin, she unlaced her breast band and dropped it to the floor, bringing her hands back up to cup her breasts. Winking to Zevran, she pressed them together and pinched her nipples. He chuckled and folded his hands behind his head.

Kallian removed her smalls, slowly sliding them down her legs. Stepping out of them, she paused to look at her belly and ran a hand over it. "I can hardly wait for our son to be born, Zevran. I wonder what he'll be like?"

"He will be incredibly handsome, like me, kind and generous, like you, and a wickedly awesome rogue. With us as his parents, these things are inevitable."

Giggling, Kallian stretched out beside him, her body half on his, and plunged her hands into his hair, covering his mouth with hers. Stroking and tugging gently on his ears, she reveled in the effect it had on Zevran, and their kisses became more passionate. She pulled herself up and straddled his hips, slowly rubbing her sex back and forth along his length as he hardened again. The feel of Kallian's wet heat against him was intoxicating and he reached for her hips, but she grabbed his hands and pinned them to the floor above his head.

"Oh ho, what is this, tesora?"

She only laughed in response as she rocked her hips to position herself so that she could take him within her. Sitting up, she slowly settled herself down onto his hips. She slipped her hand between her legs and rubbed herself, her fingers occasionally stroking Zevran. She was beautiful in the golden glow of the fire, her skin rosy, her hair shining.

Kallian rode him, her hips moving back and forth and around in circles, grinding against him, until she reached a fevered pitch that brought them both to a shuddering climax, leaving them gasping for breath. She lay beside him for a while, feeling his heart pounding in his chest as she snuggled up to him.

"I love you, Zev."

"Mio cuore è tuo, cara moglie, my heart is yours."

They lay together a few minutes longer, enjoying the afterglow of their lovemaking and the warmth of the fire. Finally, and with great reluctance on Kallian's part, they tidied themselves up, dressed, and went to their chambers for the night. Pushing thoughts of what the morning might bring out of her mind, Kallian fell asleep in Zevran's arms, content to enjoy the moment.

xXx

_24 Firstfall, 9:30_

_My dreams were haunted by visions of broodmothers, several of them, and I do not know what to make of it. I fear this Mother the First referred to is in fact a broodmother, which certainly makes sense, and I wonder how she fits into what is going on here. The other Wardens all confessed to having similar dreams and Velanna is particularly quiet and withdrawn today. We cannot dwell on it, however, as there is much to do. _

_Ignacio and Cesar had to leave at dawn in order to meet their commitments in Amaranthine, and Zevran is in better spirits as a result. Temmerly and his men remain silent on the matter of who else is involved in this conspiracy, and so it remains unresolved. Leliana has left to see if she can observe Lord Guy at his estate. _

_Kristoff/Justice has now made an appearance and while a few people at the keep are afraid of him, his presence has generally been accepted. Anders tells me there is some strange magic keeping him in a suspended state, preventing him from deteriorating as quickly as a normal corpse would. He believes the First was not a mage himself, but rather was using some sort of rune to activate the spell that pulled us into the fade. I hardly have knowledge of such things, but one of two things is clear. Either the one who enchanted Kristoff's corpse to keep it recognizable long enough for me to find it is still alive, or this magic will wear off at some point, and who can say what will happen then? What a strange situation this is. _

_On a more positive note, I have received word from Ser Cauthrien that she is coming to the keep within the next few days with three recruits, which is good news indeed. I was beginning to lose hope that I would find more volunteers and would forever be conscripting reluctant Wardens._

_There is no word from First Warden Ronan. I don't know what to make of that, but I doubt my report about the Architect has reached him yet. I am disappointed, but have managed this long without them. If I must continue to figure it out as I go, so be it._

_~KA_

Kallian put her quill down and looked at the fire. It had burned down to coals and a chill was settling upon the room. She got up and put more kindling and logs on the brazier, and poured herself another cup of spiced tea. Wrapping the warm mug with her hands, she stretched and looked around the library. Lucius was just a few feet away, snoring lightly, with Ser Pounce snuggled up against his chest. Anders sat at a reading table, his nose buried in one of Avernus' texts, and Velanna had curled up in a chair to read one of Kallian's Blight journals. The others were around the keep, training or otherwise amusing themselves. Killian took a sip of tea and walked to the window to look out onto the sloping landscape around them. A wind had risen up, shaking the last of the leaves from the trees and bringing with it darker clouds. As if to answer her unspoken question, she spotted fat, wet flakes of snow begin to fall.

Just a year ago she had been preparing herself for an arranged marriage; by the beginning of the year, she was one of only two surviving Grey Wardens on the run, wanted for treason. She wondered what this new year would bring for them all. Her stomach growled and she heard Anders chuckle behind her.

"Couldn't have said it better myself. It must be time to eat, right?"

Kallian nodded. "I think we should check on preparations for the evening meal. Walk with me? Velanna, I hope you'll join us this evening."

The elven mage looked up briefly. "Thank you, Commander. I...will take you up on that offer." She was still awkward and difficult to gauge, but was at least making an effort to be pleasant occasionally.

Anders stood and collected Ser Pounce, tucking the book he was reading under his arm. He offered his other arm to Kallian, who linked elbows with him. Lucius followed them as they left the library and headed to the kitchen. When she was sure they were alone, Kallian looked up at Anders.

"Talindra seems fond of you."

"Hmm? Oh, well it's the sparklefingers," he said with a grin. "She's a sweetheart, isn't she?"

"Yes. And Myriani?"

"What about her?"

"What about her?" Kallian laughed. "Do you like her?"

Anders looked at her for a moment before shaking his head. "She's a lovely woman. I suppose I just thought...well, I'm a mage."

"That isn't all you are, Anders. You're a man, too, in case that fact somehow managed to escape your attention."

"Oh, right. That explains a few things." He grinned as she swatted his arm.

"Myriani isn't afraid of you or your magic, and neither is Talindra. You don't have anything against elves, do you?"

"What? No, of course not, you know that. Well, maybe just Namaya."

Kallian laughed. "I didn't particularly care for Namaya either. But seriously, Anders, are you going to live your life the way the templars would have you live, or the way you'd like to live?"

He was silent for a moment. "She is a pretty girl," he mused at last. "And she's the only one who offers to take care of Ser Pounce when I'm gone..."

"You'll probably always have to keep an eye open for those who would harm you, Anders, but you can choose to be happy, to live your life on your terms, and deal with what may come when it comes."

Anders stopped walking and turned to look down at Kallian. "You speak from experience?"

She smiled back at him. "Yes. When I was in the alienage, humans expected me to be subservient, to learn my place and stay in it. I guess I showed them." She snickered. "I could live in fear of the Crows, of the Amaranthine nobles who would remove me from power, even of the darkspawn, the Mother, and the Architect. But take those things away, and I have a good life, a good husband and some very fine friends."

As if to emphasize her point, the sounds of a growing crowd of hungry people drifted to them from the great hall and a group of soldiers passed them by, offering greetings as they went. Kallian took Anders' arm again and they continued walking.

"You deserve happiness as much as the next person, Anders. Don't let a good opportunity pass you by because someone else is convinced you don't deserve it." She looked up to see Zevran approaching them. "You don't want to regret never having tried. It could turn out to be the best thing you ever did."

Anders squeezed her arm and nodded, peering into the great hall. "Thank you, Commander. I think I see someone I'd like to talk to. Zevran." He smiled at Zevran and slipped off toward the merchants' table.

Zevran raised an eyebrow as he watched Anders sit with Talindra and Myriani. "You have been encouraging?"

Kallian slipped her arm around Zevran's waist, pulling his around her shoulders. "I have, and I would bet one sovereign they will be a couple within a week, if that."

"You are that confident in your skills as a matchmaker?" He steered them toward the high table.

"I can't take all the credit for any success Anders might have there. The cards are rather stacked in his favor, I simply encouraged him to...explore the possibility."

The residents of Vigil's Keep sat down to a hearty venison stew and stayed up late into the evening recounting stories and singing songs, enjoying the company they kept. Outside, a proper storm continued to build, covering the landscape with a thick, white blanket of snow. The peaceful silence that descended upon Amaranthine's surface was a stark contrast to the turmoil that raged beneath it, threatening to break free and destroy what lay above.

* * *

**A/N:** Apologies for the late updates; I had hoped to get this out in two weeks or less, but...My thanks goes to Bioware, for the playground; to Mille Libri for her beta skills (if there are errors now, it's because I tinkered after the beta read!); to Zevgirl and Zute for their friendship and encouragement; to everyone who reads, and takes the time to comment. I love hearing from you! Cheers, Biff.


	17. An Afternoon at the Crown and Lion

**An Afternoon at the Crown and Lion**

25 Firstfall, 9:30

"Commander, watch out!" Anders bellowed from across the outer bailey.

Kallian turned a moment too late and caught a wet snowball in the side of her face. Snow filled her ear and slid down her neck into the folds of her cape. Laughing, she shook it from her head and threw her own slushy projectile at Oghren, catching him in the forehead. Zevran chuckled, launching his arsenal at the dwarf. Suddenly, snowballs flew from all directions. Several soldiers, the keep's maids, even Varel and Garevel joined in the fun and before long, the smooth white blanket that had covered the ground was a trampled mess of footprints, with piles of snowballs scattering the landscape.

Kallian had a particularly large one ready to launch at Anders and threw it as hard as she could, realizing too late that Nathaniel was crossing her line of fire. The snowball hit him squarely in the ear and everyone stopped what they were doing, waiting to see how the sullen Howe would react. Nathaniel tipped his head to one side, putting the crate he was carrying on the ground as he shook snow from his ear.

"I wish you hadn't done that, Commander."

"Why is that, Nate?" Kallian asked, hoping their relationship was as good as she thought it was.

"You've ruined the element of surprise." He reached down into the crate and hurled a snowball back at her so fast, she was barely able to duck out of the way.

The crate was full of snowballs and Nathaniel began throwing them in every direction, hitting Oghren, Anders and Zevran in quick succession. Once again, the space between the group gathered in the bailey was filled with snowballs flying back and forth, exploding as they collided with each other or hit their intended targets. Shouts and laughter echoed around the bailey and the battle raged on until the bell sounding the midday meal rang out.

xXx

27 Firstfall, 9:30

The cold spell was short, the rains returned, and the snow quickly disappeared. Kallian, the Wardens, and several members of the household were waiting to greet Cauthrien when she arrived shortly after midday with her three recruits.

"Warden Cauthrien, welcome to Vigil's Keep." Kallian smiled warmly as the warrior approached the gates.

Cauthrien smiled, crossing her arms over her chest and bowing slightly. "Thank you, Warden Commander. I bring a message for you from King Alistair and another from Queen Anora. She was deeply saddened to hear of Ser Tamra's death." She pulled a small leather-bound package from her cuirass and handed it to Kallian.

"Thank you. So, these are our recruits?" Kallian asked, turning to face the two male humans and the female elf who accompanied Cauthrien.

Cauthrien introduced Kallian to the recruits. "This is Alfred and Connell, from Denerim, and Vanya, from Redcliffe."

Kallian welcomed the recruits, introducing them to the other Wardens. "Our Senior Mage, Anders, and my healer, Petra, will examine you tomorrow to assess your general health, before you report to the training yard to spar with the others.

"In the meantime, Mistress Woolsey will show you to your rooms. Recruits, you will bunk in the soldiers' barracks. Cauthrien, we have a room for you on the second floor with the senior Wardens. You can all get cleaned up and rest, and then join us for the evening meal. If all goes well and we like what we see tomorrow, you will be initiated into our ranks in the evening."

The recruits responded with a uniform "Yes, Warden Commander" before turning to follow Cauthrien and Woolsey.

As she watched them go, Kallian felt a familiar nervousness in the pit of her stomach. Any recruit could die during the Joining; intellectually, she accepted this as inevitability, but it took an emotional toll on her. Her eyes followed them as they disappeared into the keep, and she stood staring at the gates after they were gone from sight. As the others went back to their duties, Zevran moved closer to her, taking her hand in his.

"You worry, tesora." He pulled her to him and kissed her forehead.

She shook herself. "I do, but there is nothing to be done about it. If they are fit to serve and they wish to do so, I will not deny them."

Zevran cupped her cheek with his free hand and she leaned into it, breathing in scents of leather, sweat, and soap. The idea that Zevran would leave the keep to pursue the Crow Ignacio warned them about had continued to plague her. She had tried to hide it, but standing so close to Zevran, enveloped by his warmth, she found herself feeling a sudden sadness that she could no longer hide.

"Kalli, what is it?" he asked, tipping her chin up so he could look her in the eye. Seeing the tears that were beginning to well up, he sighed and hugged her tightly. "You must not let Nuncio get to you this way, tesora. He is nothing, he is not worth your thoughts or your tears."

"But he poses a threat to you, and you are everything to me, Zevran," she whispered into his chest.

"As you are to me, Kalli, you know this, but would you have this ghost haunting our every moment together? Would you give him that power?" He brushed his fingers across her cheek, wiping away her tears. "Come. I think you need a nice warm bath and a massage, hmm?"

"A massage, or a _massage_?"

Zevran laughed as he steered her toward the keep. "Your wish is my command, cara moglie."

"Mmm. In that case, I wish for a bath and a massage and an afternoon tucked away in our cozy rooms with you, some tea and some chocolate. And some cheese. Ooh, and pickles if there are any left."

"You don't want all of that together at the same time, do you?" he asked, his nose wrinkling up with disgust.

The thought of stacking cheese, pickles and chocolate together and eating it all with Antivan spiced tea made Kallian burst out laughing. "What? No! Eww."

They went to the kitchens to collect an assortment of cheese, pickles and bread before continuing on to their chambers, pausing only to leave instructions with Varel that they were not to be disturbed until the evening meal.

xXx

28 Firstfall, 9:30

Kallian sat on the couch in front of the library fireplace, her feet on a footstool, a piece of parchment in her hands.

_Warden Commander Kallian Arainai_

_Thank you for informing us of Ser Tamra's death. I understand your men apprehended her killers. Tamra was a friend to me, knighted for her service to the Crown. She served Ferelden well and will be missed. Do what must be done with her killers. _

_Alistair has told me of your trials in Amaranthine. I pray for your safety. May the Maker watch over you._

_Anora Theirin_

Kallian put down the Queen's letter and reached for the second piece of parchment Cauthrien had delivered to her.

_Arlessa of Amaranthine, Warden Commander of the Ferelden Grey Wardens, and friend to the Crown, Kallian Arainai ~ _

Kallian couldn't help but laugh at the way Alistair addressed her.

_Sister, thank you for your letter. The report of your encounter with the Architect was disturbing, but I am grateful to know you all survived the ordeal with no apparent ill effects. I regret that I cannot be of more use to you and your recruits, but the business of running the country while trying to help it recover from this Blight is quite challenging. Anora wouldn't hear of it anyway. I will offer whatever support I can in the way of weapons, supplies and even soldiers, if possible. You need only ask for it. _

_I am disappointed that the Wardens from Weisshaupt aren't offering any support or advice - have you heard still not from them? - but we did just fine under your leadership during the Blight, Kallian, __and__ you killed the archdemon, without so much as a single word from them. I have always trusted your judgment and have no doubts that you will continue to be the thoughtful leader you have proven yourself to be. It sounds as though you have a good team. I have to admit I was surprised to hear that Howe's son joined your ranks, but I hear he is proving himself loyal. Cauthrien's recruits are skilled, I have sparred with them._

The thought of Alistair sparring with Grey Warden recruits brought back memories of their travels during the Blight, the times they had practiced with each other and their companions, and even as a smile graced her lips, she felt a pang of sadness. She missed him and those companions who were now gone. Shaking herself out of her introspective state, she looked back to Alistair's letter.

_Five new Grey Wardens and three recruits in just over one month is quite the accomplishment, Kallian. If you need more Wardens with experience, however, Orlais might be willing to send more to bolster your ranks. _

Kallian paused. _Six,_ she amended silently. _I wonder what he'll think when he hears about Justice? _Her eyes drifted back to the parchment in her hands.

_As for Anora and I...our friendship continues to grow and we do seem to be a good match. In truth, I come to believe it more and more each day myself. I am learning a great deal about governance, and my father and brother, surprisingly. I am not finding this to be as terrible as I thought it would be, and I think I have you to thank for that, Kallian. Your friendship got me through difficult times, and helped me to see my duty and not fear it. That is something for which I am grateful._

_I look forward to seeing you at our wedding in Wintermarch, and pray the Maker will keep you and yours safe until then._

_Alistair Theirin _  
_King of Ferelden, Occasional Warden, Former Templar Recruit, and Lover of Fine Cheeses._

Kallian put Alistair's letter down and went to the window, feeling the moisture of more tears on her cheeks. She brushed them away angrily, cursing herself for being so emotional of late. Petra had warned her she might begin to feel somewhat moody as her pregnancy progressed, and it certainly did not help that it looked as though no advice or assistance would be coming their way any time soon. She felt quite alone in spite of being surrounded by people. The familiar itch of the taint moving in her veins that signaled the approach of fellow Wardens, and the sound of a footfall behind her, brought her out of her reverie. Wiping her face quickly, she turned to find Nathaniel and Anders entering the library.

"Are you all right, Kallian?" Anders asked as he strode toward her.

"Yes. No. I don't know." She sat down at her desk and put her head in her hands. "Alistair sends his regrets, offers soldiers and such if we need it, but..." she let her voice trail off, shaking her head. "He's got nothing. You know, at this point, I think I know more about the darkspawn than he does."

Anders and Nathaniel sat across from her, and Howe spoke. "I see. So, no help there and still no word from the Anderfels."

"Right. I suppose I do have to take into account the fact that they are very far away," she waved her hand dismissively, "but can't First Warden Ronan send so much as damn pigeon to me with some bit of wisdom?" She dropped a fist onto her desk and stood up again to pace back and forth.

"So far all I've got is the threat of a visit at some point in the future. Bah! He can visit the bloody Void for all I care. We need to get this situation with the Architect and the Mother figured out, get to the bottom of this conspiracy against us, and look into the chasm at Knotwood Hills, and if the First Warden can't offer me any help or advice about what to do about any of this, something that you'd think affects him as much as it does us, then I have absolutely no use for him." She stopped pacing, realizing she was nearly yelling.

Anders' eyes danced with amusement. "That's telling him!"

"Oh shut up," she grumbled as she sat at her desk again. "Never mind that for now. How do the recruits look?"

Anders nodded and tried to look serious again, failing miserably as he pulled Ser Pounce-a-lot from within his robes and tickled the kitten's chin. "Aside from being slightly undernourished, as are a number of the general population, they are all disease free and reasonably fit. Vanya had a mild chest infection, but Petra's given her some potions to clear it up. I'd say they'll be in excellent fighting form in no time, once they're eating regularly."

Kallian turned to Nathaniel. "How did they do in training?"

"Alfred is a fairly well-accomplished archer, and Connell fights well with a sword and shield. Vanya can use a bow and dual weapons. Daggers, mostly, but short swords as well. They also seem to be good humored and tolerant of mages. And Oghren." Howe smiled briefly before his features settled back into a more neutral expression.

"Why Nathaniel, did you just make a joke?" Kallian smirked. "So there is no readily apparent reason why we should deny them the opportunity to join our ranks?" Both men shook their heads. "All right. We will perform the Joining ceremony after the evening meal, then. Nathaniel, I'd appreciate it if you could check in with Voldrik for an update on the keep's fortifications and report back to me. Tomorrow will be fine."

"Certainly, Commander," he said with a nod as he stood to leave. "I will see you later."

Anders stood and sat on the edge of Kallian's desk. "Sure you're all right?"

Leaning back in her chair, Kallian folded her hands over her stomach. "Mmm. Just the usual. Worried about how the Joining will go, wondering what's next, heartburn, random mood swings and emotions, you know." She shrugged.

He chuckled lightly, handing her a minor healing potion for the heartburn. "There is quite a bit going on and you are growing a little elf in there."

As if to emphasize the mage's point, the child moved at that moment, and Kallian laughed, rubbing her belly. "I feel big."

"What? You are hardly _big_. You look exactly as a healthy young woman should in your condition and you know it. Of course you'll feel _huge _the closer it is to your time, but you'll have about six or seven pounds of baby in there by then."

She stared down at her stomach, imagining the small mass there as a living, breathing child she could hold in her arms.

"It's so…mind boggling, really. I used to dream about this, but I always pictured myself being just another wife and mother in the alienage. This," she waved her hand at nothing in particular, "is…too much some days. I wish…well, I would really like to get the arling in order and send the damn darkspawn to the Void before the baby is born."

Anders frowned at the troubled expression that crossed Kallian's face. "Commander...Kallian. Don't worry, we'll work all this out, you'll see. When he's born, your only concern will be keeping him fed and in dry swaddling clothes, and getting enough sleep."

"From your mouth to the Andraste's ears, Anders."

xXx

It was a familiar and comforting sight. The throne room was swathed with the golden glow of firelight, the central fire pit was fully engaged, large logs burned in both fireplaces behind the throne, and all around the room the wall sconces sparkled with candlelight. Glittering light danced along every reflective surface. Even with the somber purpose of this gathering foremost in her mind, Kallian found herself enchanted by the sight of the throne room as she stepped out of the antechamber to oversee the Joining. Varel stood at the base of the dais before the throne, and behind him a row of Wardens, fully armed and armored: Cauthrien, Mhairi, Oghren, Velanna, and Justice. Alfred, Connell, and Vanya faced them, looking confident, proud, and just a bit nervous. Anders and Nathaniel stood to one side of the row of recruits, ready to catch them as they fell, once they'd had the potion.

Taking her place beside Varel, Kallian took a deep breath. She had told her new recruits as much as Duncan told her, Daveth and Jory before their joining ceremony, and with better results than Duncan, she thought wryly. She was feeling more confident about the recruits and the Joining ceremony now and nodded to Varel to proceed.

Varel's voice and the words he spoke barely registered in Kallian's mind. The ceremony unfolded before her slowly, each recruit taking the chalice, swallowing the potion, and falling backwards into Nathaniel's and Anders's arms. As each recruit fell, they were laid out on the ground so Anders could assess their health. All three recruits lived and were in a deep, if somewhat restless, sleep. Cots were brought in for them and three soldiers who were assigned to sleep in the throne room with them for the evening. If anything were to happen, one of them would fetch Anders.

"Congratulations, Commander. Another successful Joining."

"Thank you, Varel. I am pleased." Kallian looked at the recruits one last time before returning to her chambers for the evening.

xXx

Barely an hour after she had drifted off to sleep in Zevran's arms, they were awakened by a clamor in the hallway. Someone was yelling and banging on a door. Pulling on their night clothes and robes, they ran out to find one of the soldiers assigned to the throne room banging on Anders' door. Anders yanked it open as Kallian stepped into the hallway, his hair in a wild mess about his head and shoulders, the collar of a shirt caught between his teeth as he fumbled with the laces of his trews.

"What is it, man?" Anders asked as he pulled his shirt on.

The sounds of a fussing child drifted out from his sitting room, and Kallian could see Myriani slip out of Anders' bed chamber to attend to Talindra. If it hadn't been for the circumstances, she would have been rather pleased with herself.

"I am sorry, ser, but it's the recruit Alfred, he's burning up with fever."

Anders reached for a small bag inside the doorway. "I'll be back, Myr," he said softly as he pulled it shut.

Doors were opening up and down the hallway; Wardens poked their heads out to assess the situation. Anders grabbed the soldier's arm and started walking toward the stairwell with him.

"Is it bad?" The soldier nodded. "Then we've got to hurry, get him into the communal showers and into cold water." A shimmer of light flickered in Anders' hand as he started to run and the two men disappeared down the stairs, aided along by a haste spell.

Anders was on his knees by Alfred's cot with the three soldiers standing nearby when Kallian and Zevran came sliding to a halt outside the throne room. She had hoped Anders would be on his way to the showers, but knew from his posture that he hadn't been able to save Alfred. Her own eyes stinging with tears, she went to the mage's side and put her hand on his shoulder, squeezing it. Alfred's face and shirt were splattered with drops of blood, he was soaked with sweat, and his skin was flushed a deep red. Vanya and Connell sat together on one cot that had been pushed away from the others, looking dazed and confused by the activity around them. Other household members began gathering in the hallway and Kallian heard Zevran's voice rising above the voice of the crowd. She turned to see him at the doorway, asking everyone to return to their rooms for the night.

"Anders," she whispered. "What happened?"

"Fever, a delayed reaction to the taint. I can't believe how quickly it took him. They say he awoke in a sweat and started convulsing. They sent Rodger there to get me, without delay. Alfred was rigid when I got here, coughing up blood, and _hot_, and then he...died. I'm sorry, Commander, there was nothing I could do."

She shook her head. "Don't apologize, it isn't your fault. This can happen. Alistair mentioned it once during the Blight. I guess I just hoped our luck would hold out." She patted his shoulder, seeing Varel approaching.

"Commander?"

Kallian took a deep breath. Pushing aside her personal feelings took considerable effort, but she cleared her throat and swallowed, turning to face Varel. "Fever. Could you make the appropriate arrangements? Pyre at dawn, notify his kin. I'm sure Cauthrien will have those details." Varel nodded grimly and got to work immediately.

"Anders, when you're finished here, please check Vanya and Connell to make sure they are all right."

"Vanya, Connell," Kallian said gently, walking to the cot to speak with her new Wardens.

Vanya looked up at her, eyes wide. "I thought if we survived the Joining, we'd be okay."

"So did I, Vanya, but this," she gestured to Alfred, "can sometimes happen. I think the danger for you had passed."

"We...we'll be okay," Connell said, his voice rough with emotion. "It's just…I've known Alfred all my life. I can't believe I talked him into this."

Kallian bit her lip to keep it from betraying her, and after a moment's pause she nodded. "I'm sorry for your loss. Please let Anders tend to you, and then get something to eat and drink, and try to sleep. There will be a funeral pyre for Alfred in the morning, and then you'll have a day to yourselves before you begin your training regime and get caught up on activity in the area."

The latest additions to her team nodded mutely and looked on as Alfred's body was wrapped in sheets and taken away. Sleep did not come easily for anyone that night.

xXx

_29 Firstfall, 9:30_

_His Royal Highness, King Alistair Theirin, Occasional Warden, Former Templar Recruit, Lover of Fine Cheeses to the Point of Insanity, Brother and Dear Friend ~_

_Thank you for your letter. Rest assured I will need your assistance, of that I have little doubt, Alistair. It is only a matter of time. I am afraid this missive bears bad news. Alfred developed a fever after his Joining and succumbed to it quickly. We held a funeral for him at dawn today. I am weary and sad, as are all of us who met Alfred in his very short time here. He was a pleasant and cheerful man, from what I saw of him, and he would have complemented us well._

_I must keep this brief as we leave for the City of Amaranthine shortly, but I should have more to report soon. After we wrap up our business in the city, we will travel west to Knotwood Hills to look into a report of darkspawn activity there. _

_May the Maker watch over you and Anora, Alistair._

_Kallian Arainai_  
_Warden Commander, Ferelden Grey Wardens_

Kallian blew the ink dry and slipped Alistair's letter into a leather delivery pouch with her note to Anora. Leaving it on her desk for Varel to send to Denerim, she collected her journal and cloak, and went to the main hall to join her party. Zevran, Nathaniel, Anders, the dogs and a small complement of household staff stood waiting.

Her mood lifted as they departed. It wasn't a particularly warm day, but the skies were clear, the winds were calm, and the company was pleasant. For the moment, it was nice to enjoy the simple pleasure of an outing with friends and the feeling of sunshine on her face.

xXx

After eating a mid-afternoon meal at the Crown and Lion, Nathaniel went to visit his sister while Zevran, Dorothy, and the merchants who had travelled with them, ran errands of their own. Kallian and Anders stayed behind to pack Kristoff's things and find Keenan's wife, Nida.

The bartender handed the key to Kristoff's room to Kallian. "The woman named Nida is in the room at the top of the stairs, on your right."

As they paused at the top of the stairs, Kallian nudged Anders and nodded to the right. "Let's get this bit of unpleasantness out of the way first. Lucius, you stay here." The hound woofed gently and sat down.

The door to Nida's room was open and they could see a man and woman standing by the fireplace inside the room. Kallian knocked on the door frame and addressed the woman.

"Excuse me, may I speak with you for a moment?"

The woman took a step back to stand just behind her friend. "Bran, I don't know this person."

Kallian watched as Bran reached behind him for the woman's hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze before addressing Kallian.

"Is there something you want? My companion is not comfortable around strangers."

_Companion? _Kallian thought to herself, her eye on the couple's clasped hands. She swallowed back the anger she felt and focused on her task, keeping an even tone. "I am Warden Commander Kallian Arainai. Are you Nida, Warden Keenan's wife?"

Nida nodded. "Yes, I am. Something has happened, hasn't it? I...um...sweetheart, could you give us a moment, please?" She waited for Bran to leave the room and then turned back to Kallian.

"Is Keenan dead?"

_Sweetheart? _"Yes, he is. I am sorry for your loss." Kallian knew nothing about Nida and her marriage to Keenan, and yet she was completely offended by what she assumed was Nida's infidelity. It infuriated her to imagine Keenan, a fellow Warden, living and dying as he had, thinking he had the love and support of this wife, when clearly he did not.

"You're cheating on him, aren't you?" Kallian's throat was tight with emotion. She heard Anders shift behind her and clear his throat.

Nida looked away, sorrow in her eyes. "Keenan always said he joined the Wardens to give me a better life. Was it really better for me to be alone in a strange country? Wondering if we'd ever have a family?" She looked back at Kallian. "He was gone for months at time, often without word. Was I supposed to wait forever? He forgets that I am a living, breathing woman, not just a symbol of something he's fighting for. Love can only take you so far."

Kallian gasped. "He fought against a group of darkspawn that attacked Vigil's Keep, killing most of our Orlesian brothers. He was..."

"Commander," Anders pleaded softly, his hand on her arm.

She pulled away from him. "...subjected to _experiments_ by them. He tried to escape, but his legs were horribly injured in the fight and he died a long and painful death because of it. His last thoughts on this earth were of _you_. He wanted me to give you this." She held up Keenan's wedding ring and shook it at Nida. "And yet, while he was thinking of _you_, you were here..." Her voice broke.

"Commander," Anders tried again, taking the ring from Kallian. "My lady, your husband's wedding ring. We'll be leaving."

He handed the ring to Nida and turned Kallian around, steering her out of Nida's room into the hallway. Kallian twisted away from him and continued down the hall to Kristoff's room. Opening the door, she motioned Lucius in, sat on the bed, and put her elbows on her knees and her head in her hands. Anders closed the door behind him and leaned against the wall.

"Are you going to be okay?" Anders asked at last, handing her a handkerchief.

She nodded with a short laugh. "I guess so, but that...that _selfish_, _philandering_..."

He nodded sympathetically. "I know, but it isn't your concern, not really. At least Keenan died not knowing, right?"

Kallian nodded, wiping her eyes dry. "I guess so. It's just so...sad."

"I can understand your reaction, but…is something else bothering you? We've had a few really good days since returning from the Blackmarsh, but you've seemed preoccupied since those Antivan merchants left. If you don't want to talk about it, that's fine. I just thought maybe..."

Kallian started crying again and he sat beside her to slip an arm around her shoulders.

"Hey, hey, it's okay. Look, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, just know that you can, all right?" She nodded, sniffling.

"Good. Look, why don't we pack this stuff up and get out of here? Think of it, nice hot meal by the fireplace with your husband and a few choice friends, a good night's sleep, a full Fereldan breakfast. Hmm. Now I'm hungry."

"You just ate."

"I'm a Grey Warden. We have healthy appetites, Miss 'I'll have a fourth helping of pork pot pie'." He smiled as she giggled. "Feeling better?"

She shrugged. "Yeah. Thank you, Anders. You're a good friend."

"Well, I try." He looked around the room. "I'll get his trunk and pack his personal effects. Why don't you get the map and his notes?"

After several minutes of working in silence, Anders spoke. "I...ah...I wanted to thank you for giving me a nudge. You know, Myriani." He closed the trunk and sat on it.

"It's strange, knowing there's no big rush, that we can take our time getting to know each other. I'm not on the run, there aren't any templars lurking about waiting to catch us with our knickers down in the library stacks...I don't know how I am at this sort of thing, to be honest. I've never really been a stay around kind of guy."

"You _couldn't _have been then, but that doesn't mean you can't be now. She was with you last night."

Anders looked up. "Yes, but don't get the wrong idea. Nothing...I mean we..."

Kallian laughed at the expression on his face. "Anders, I wasn't asking for details or judging you. I...thought it looked good on you."

"Oh, ah...Well, it was..._nice _to find her still there, willing to let me talk about what had happened to Alfred. Not that I can't talk to you or the others, but..."

"I know what you mean." She bit her lip and looked down at her hands, catching herself playing with her wedding ring.

Anders quirked an eyebrow at her. "Talk. You know you want to."

"Ah...where to begin? Zevran doesn't want me to worry, but I...Well, I can't help it. He may be in danger, and that could put us in danger." She put a hand on her stomach and dabbed at her eyes with a handkerchief. "I am afraid that he will leave Amaranthine or even Ferelden to protect us."

"Wow." Anders let out a low whistle. "With everything else that's going on, no wonder you're tense. Would he really leave?"

Kallian shrugged, looking a little helpless. "I don't know. He hasn't exactly _said_ he wouldn't, but maybe he would, if he felt his presence was enough of a threat to us." She shook her head. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get so…I'll be fine."

Anders nodded, not looking very convinced, and stood up. "All right then, why don't we get out of here? I'll go ask the barmaid to have this hauled over to your room and I'll be right back. Lucius, keep an eye on her, will you?" Anders said to the mabari as he stepped into the hallway and called Sorcha over.

Lucius sat and watched Kallian as she dried her eyes and blew her nose. Getting down on one knee, she waved him over and scratched him behind the ears. "Who's a good boy? Who likes the pets? Lucius, that's who." She presented her cheek to the hound and giggled as he licked her face.

"Oh Maker, I hope you wash before you let Zevran kiss you," Anders groaned as he returned. Leaving the door ajar, he took one last look around the room and picked up his backpack.

"What? During the Blight, this was sometimes the only way I could get cleaned up. Isn't that right, baby?" Lucius barked and licked Kallian again. Standing, she rubbed her hands together.

"Okay, so back we go to our rooms. I think we can leave for Vigil's Keep tomorrow, get stocked up and leave for Knotwood Hills by Saturday."

"Perfect, another walk in the park, with darkspawn! Hey, what's Lucius doing?"

Kallian had also noticed that the hound had crouched down and was crawling toward the door, his nose twitching furiously as he sniffed the air. As she watched, a shadow in the hall moved and a floorboard creaked. As quickly and as quietly as she could, Kallian went to the door and peered through the opening, catching the sound of a door closing to her far right. Seeing nothing, she opened the door further and stepped out to look up and down the corridor.

"What do you see?" Anders whispered impatiently.

Kallian came back into the room and closed the door. "I think I smell salty air, seawater. Someone was eavesdropping on us and used the smugglers' tunnel to slip out." She shivered and stomped her foot angrily. "_Damnit_."

"What?"

"What do you mean, what?" she hissed. "I am a trained rogue, a Grey Warden. I've killed dragons and an archdemon for crying out loud, and here I am crying all the damn time, letting people sneak up on me and eavesdrop on my conversations, and then sneak off, and I'm actually feeling a bit scared right now. What the hell is _wrong _with me?"

A knock at the door startled both of them. Lucius woofed, his tail wagging.

"Mes amis? C'est moi, Leliana."

Kallian let out a sigh of relief and opened the door. Leliana slipped in and hugged her.

"You did not see who it was, Kallian? Hello Anders."

The mage smiled. "Hello."

"No, did you? Where did you come from?"

Pulling her hood off, Leliana nodded. "I was following Lord Guy, mon amie. He handed money to a man outside the inn, and that man was the one who listened outside your door. I saw him from the common room below the landing. What were you talking about?"

Kallian and Anders looked at each other for a moment.

"Ah…Anders and I were talking about the woman he's seeing, I mentioned Zevran...um...he went out into the hall to talk to Sorcha, came back in, and I said...oh…I said we'd head back to Vigil's Keep tomorrow and leave for Knotwood Hills by Saturday."

"Hmm." Leliana tapped a slender finger on her chin. Turning to Anders, she asked, "You are seeing Myriani, yes?"

A look of confusion crossed Anders's face. "What? What has that got to do with Creepy Guy in the hall?"

Leliana smiled and linked her arm around Kallian's. "Nothing. You remind me of Alistair sometimes, Anders. I would not have expected it, but you even blush like him.

"Come, mes amis. We must meet Zevran and the others at the Crow and Gate. We have things to discuss." The bard pulled her hood back up to hide her red hair and turned to the door.

Kallian let Leliana lead her out of the inn while Anders and Lucius followed behind. An excited nervousness coursed through her as they wound their way through the city streets toward the Crow and Gate. Something was afoot, and she felt as though they had finally made some progress in getting to the bottom of the conspiracy against them.

* * *

**A/N:** Vanya - Vahn-ya

Apologies if you caught the mispost mere moments before this went up... o.O ...As always, plenty of thanks goes out to everyone who reads and comments and adds me/the story to your alert lists. A salute to Zevgirl and Zute, and a hearty wave and thank you to Mille Libri, my beta. Three great women whose support means a great deal to me. I have tinkered with this quite a bit since the beta read, so fingers crossed that I didn't botch anything up...beyond posting the wrong chapter initially...derr!

Review/comments are always welcome, indeed they really help keep me motivated. Cheers!


	18. The Best Laid Plans of Nobles & Wardens

**The Best Laid Plans of Nobles and Wardens**

29 Firstfall, 9:30

Securing the Crow and Gate for the evening wasn't difficult; Kallian and her party had rented all the small inn's rooms. Paying the owner and staff to take the night off had been equally easy, and Dorothy took over the evening meal preparations. Nathaniel, Zevran, Leliana, and Kallian searched the inn from the roof to the cellar to ensure they were good and truly alone, and Anders cast a ward over the property to warn them if anyone tried to enter the building. Finally satisfied they could sit and strategise, Kallian ordered Rosa and Lucius to keep watch while everyone changed out of their armor. The keep's merchants, Yuriah and Alexi, joined her and the others at a large table in the main dining hall, Kristoff's map of the arling spread out before them. Nathaniel tapped the City of Amaranthine's marker.

"They have been fairly cautious thus far. I do not think they would attempt to attack us here in the ctiy, not without lunatic maleficarum or smugglers to blame for our deaths."

Zevran nodded. "Too many potential witnesses. This portion of the Pilgrim's Path to Vigil's Keep is too open and well-travelled these days for such an attack. They may attack, yes, but the risk of being seen and arrested, or even killed, is high. Again, at the keep, too many people for an outright attack. A spy or two to infiltrate the household, perhaps, but I am confident that has not happened yet. No, it is most likely they are looking for an element of surprise."

Kallian traced the North Road to a trail that branched off to the south and ended at Knotwood Hills. "What's this road like?"

Yuriah spoke up. "As you know, my lady, the North Road is also fairly open, raised up in several sections and thus visible to many farms and estates along the route."

Kallian nodded. "Yes, we travelled that road a few times during the Blight. The landscape _here_, to the west, does provide some cover, though. "

"Yes." Yuriah tapped the trail. "This trail is narrow and cuts into the surrounding hills. I've never been to Knotwood myself, only seen the trail head, so I can't say for certain how long it extends that way, but I suppose it opens up into the area where these hunters found the chasm."

Zevran used a string to trace the trail and then compared it to the scale at the bottom of the map. "If the map is accurate, I would take that to be a walk of about...half an hour at a moderate pace?" The others agreed.

Anders groaned. "Great, so the most likely scenario is that we get ambushed in a tunnel. Just my luck."

Leliana clucked her tongue and patted Anders's arm. "We are forewarned; we can ambush the ambushers if we plan well enough."

"Yes, but that doesn't change the fact that we'll be in a tunnel." He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest, glaring at the map. "I'd like to make a suggestion."

"Of course, Anders, what is it?" Kallian asked.

"Bring Velanna on this one. Her variety of magic will come in handy here, I'd think. It lends itself to sneakiness, whereas mine does not. Unless you don't want me in the tunnel? or there at all?" He looked rather hopeful that Kallian would excuse him from this mission, which would clearly involve tunnels.

Her expression killed that hope, although kindly. "Anders, you are my senior mage, our only healer, and I've come to rely on you a great deal. You're right about Velanna, but even if she could heal, her bedside manner would leave much to be desired and maybe even kill us. No, you're definitely coming, my friend. I'm sorry."

"No, you're not," he complained, looking resigned.

"Well...not too much, anyway." She grinned at him. "Okay, so let's say I have Lucius, Oghren, Anders, and Justice with me..."

Slowly, a plan began to form as the sun settled into the horizon, and finally they were left with no questions save for what might be causing such delicious aromas to emanate from the kitchen, and it wasn't long before Dorothy appeared at the kitchen doorway.

"Right, get all that put away and get yourselves cleaned up. Alexi, Yuriah, come give me a hand with the roast and trimmings. Why don't one of you pour some ale and another set the table, hmm?" She looked from Kallian to each of her companions, an eyebrow raised expectantly in a very motherly manner.

So ordered, everyone set to a task and within minutes they were all seated around the table, enjoying roasted pig, a variety of root vegetables, and herbed bread. The group ended the evening with pumpkin pie and settled by the fire with their drinks, each silently contemplating the days to come.

Finally, they prepared to turn in for the night and set a watch roster. Anders approached Kallian and Zevran.

"Look, Commander, you're tired. Why don't the two of you take the night off and let the rest of us keep an eye on things, all right? Healer's orders."

Too tired to put up much resistance, and finding herself incredibly grateful to Anders, she acquiesced and let Zevran lead her up to their suite on the top floor.

He sat her down in a chair by the fireplace and put her feet up on a stool, then turned to put more logs on the brazier. He turned back to Kallian and began to remove her shoes and socks.

"Oh, what's this?" she asked drowsily.

"A foot massage, or foreplay, if you will." He pushed the hem of her skirt up to rest upon her knees.

"Mmm, I will."

Zevran rubbed Kallian's feet and calf muscles with a subtly scented oil until the knots of tension were gone and she was more relaxed. Putting the oil away, he kissed her knees as his hands strayed up over her thighs to brush along the edges of her smalls. He could feel the moisture already building there and smiled, slipping two fingers between the fabric and the folds of flesh it covered. She moaned and shifted in the chair so he could pull her smalls off, which he did, and quickly. Sliding his fingers into her, he rubbed his thumb over the pearl at her core, and before long she was quivering and clenching around his fingers. Zevran freed himself from his trews and stood Kallian up, trading places with her so she could straddle his lap. She hovered over him for but a moment before settling down on him, sighing deeply as he filled her. Soon, they were both falling into the abyss, riding a wave so powerful it was several minutes before either of them could find the energy to stand and walk to their bed.

xXx

30 Firsfall, 9:30

They left the city at dawn, making good time on their return trip. Nothing untoward or suspicious occurred along the way, confirming some of their assumptions.

Varel met them at the gates, his eyes flickering to Leliana. He greeted the others and leaned in to speak with Kallian. "Good morning, Commander. I take it you have news?"

Kallian motioned for him to join them as they continued through the market. "We have made progress, yes. And has anything happened in our absence?"

The seneschal nodded, a grave expression on his face, as he took her helm and gloves from her. "Mmm. Aura arrived not long after you left and all but walked right into Justice."

Kallian stopped and stared at him as she processed what he had said. "Maker's breath, I can only imagine her horror. How is she?"

"Justice was..._forthright _with the facts of the matter, which, as you say, were understandably horrifying for the poor woman. She fainted, but Petra happened to be nearby and has seen to her. She is resting comfortably in one of the guest rooms and Justice is keeping his distance. He wishes to speak with you."

"I hope he isn't going to ask for advice on how to deal with Kristoff's wife. I have no idea..." She held her hands up helplessly, casting a glance around the group of men with her. Getting nothing more than questioning or sympathetic looks in return, she sighed. "Anything else?" Kallian started moving again.

"Darkspawn attacks in the farmlands. Our soldiers have responded well, due in large part to Master Wade's smithing genius and Ambassador Cera's enchantments. Dworkin has also made a large stock of explosives and I arranged for each of you to receive a supply of them, which I believe he's delivered to the armory."

"Excellent, thank you. I'll need you and Garevel to meet us in the library in one hour, please. If you could arrange to have some food and drink brought up for all of us, I would appreciate it. Right now we need to get cleaned up. Could you please show Leliana to a guest room?"

"Of course. I will see you in one hour, Commander. My lady, if you please." He nodded to Leliana and led her ahead of the group into the keep.

Kallian spotted Private Evalyn, who stood at her post at the base of the stairs into the keep, a messenger bag slung over her shoulder. As they reached the stairs, Kallian slowed down and followed the blonde woman's gaze over her shoulder to Nathaniel. _Interesting_.

"Good afternoon, Private. Do you have any messages for us?"

The young woman started, a faint blush rising to her cheeks. "Commander. Oh, ah...give me a moment." Evalyn fidgeted with the bag, flipping it open to rifle through the contents. "Ah...no, I don't, Commander."

Kallian smiled and thanked the woman, and continued into the keep. Anders chuckled.

"Strange how Private Evalyn is still so nervous in your presence, Commander." The glint in his eye told her he was thinking the same thing she was; Private Evalyn was sweet on Nathaniel.

Grateful for anything to distract her from the more serious matters awaiting their attention, she laughed and looked pointedly at Nathaniel. "I don't think I'm the one who makes her nervous."

Howe looked from Kallian to Anders. "What are you looking at?"

"No wonder I didn't get anywhere with her," Anders mused. "She doesn't go for tall, blond, and goofy. She likes tall, dark, and broody. Hmm. Well, I'd like to get out of this armor and into something more comfortable. See you in the library," he said over his shoulder as he continued down the hall.

"Don't be ridiculous," Nathaniel muttered under his breath.

Kallian took Zevran's hand in hers. "There's nothing ridiculous about finding happiness in this life, Nate. You deserve it as much as the next person." Leaving Howe standing in the main hall, the couple retreated to their chambers.

xXx

Kallian and the others spent a few hours reviewing maps of the area, going over the details of their plan, and attempting to determine who might be involved with Guy and Esmerelle, before breaking to prepare themselves.

Zevran wanted to leave as soon as possible with Leliana, Nathaniel, Rosa, and Velanna, to scout ahead and lie in wait for the traitors. They would take a lesser-travelled road that ran roughly parallel to the North Road, the hope being they could avoid all contact with anyone who might be involved in the conspiracy. They would approach the trail to Knotwood Hills from the southeast and be in a position to watch the trail by Friday evening, which they hoped would give them ample time to spot the conspirators as they approached to set up an ambush. Kallian and her party would leave at dawn on Saturday morning, the expectation being that they would arrive at the trail head to Knotwood by mid-afternoon on Sunday.

Kallian found herself feeling more nervous than usual about being apart from Zevran, and hovered nearby as he rearranged his back pack for the trip. When he was finished, he set his things by the door to their chambers and turned to pull her into his arms.

They didn't speak, each understanding the other's need well enough, and made love against the wall, pushing aside only as much clothing as was necessary to facilitate the act. Hands and mouths roamed and claimed territory, grasping and tasting hungrily, until they were spent and it was time for them to part.

As the community saw the group off, Kallian and Zevran embraced a final time. He showered her with exaggerated kisses and dipped her backwards dramatically, drawing laughter from her and a cheer from the crowd of soldiers nearby, lightening her mood.

"Ti amo," he whispered as she smiled up at him. "We are both in good company, tesora. This will all be over in a few days' time and then we will continue on our way."

He stood up straight again and she placed her hands on his chest and looked into his amber eyes. "I'll see you soon. Ti amo."

Leliana pressed her cheek to Kallian's. "Mon amie, may the Maker watch over you and your babe."

"May the Maker watch over you all. Nate, Velanna, we'll see you soon."

The party set out as the sun began to touch the horizon.

xXx

2 Haring, 9:30

Shortly after sunset, Zevran's group found a campsite that they thought belonged to the traitors. From their vantage point on a hilltop with a slightly higher elevation than that of the camp, it was easy to see the glow of coals in the fire pit. As the moon rose, it became clear from their equipment and horses that these were not bandits or darkspawn. Crouching behind a large boulder, Nathaniel used a spyglass to search the camp and then returned to his companions.

"Esmerelle and Guy are there with two other nobles whose faces I couldn't quite see. Lord and Lady Perrin, most likely. They were always toadying up to Father and are well-known associates of Esmerelle's. They have more people with them than we expected. It looks like they brought four soldiers and four archers, but lost two soldiers in a fight with the local wildlife. There's a Bereskarn corpse down there with the others."

Velanna rubbed her upper arms, already sensitive to the warnings of the taint within her blood, a frown upon her face. "I'm surprised the darkspawn haven't taken them, I can feel them all around us."

Nathaniel nodded. "There is still hope they will do the job for us, but the darkspawn are probably underground. The hunters said the beasts were completely uninterested in them, preoccupied with something else. Let's settle in for the night and set up a watch rotation."

Velanna cast a series of spells to protect their position on the crest of the hill, several wards to keep predators out, and a sound-dampening spell to muffle any noise they might make. She called upon the trees and vines around them to form a wall behind which they could have a fire. Leliana prepared bread and cheese for them to have with the last of the stew they had made the previous evening, and they took turns watching the traitors' camp throughout the night.

xXx

3 Haring, 9:30

It was a clear and sunny day, and while it certainly wasn't warm by any means, it did feel more like spring than winter. Lucius led the group, roaming back and forth across the road ahead of Kallian and Anders. Oghren and Justice followed behind them, the dwarf pestering the spirit with questions.

"Now that you have a physical body, what do you plan to do with it?" The dwarf's eyes gleamed with mischief.

"Serve Justice, as I always have."

Oghren grunted and took a swig from his flask. "I know what I'd do if I suddenly became a whole man. He, he, he."

"You are alluding to something. I know not what," Justice replied, his eyes on the road ahead.

"You can't be that stupid." Oghren let out a loud belch.

"We have work to do," Justice stated flatly.

Oghren refused to give up. "You have memories, right? Kristoff's memories."

"Yes."

"And Kristoff was married? You have memories of that?"

"Yes."

"Aha! So you must know what I'm talking about!"

"Must I?" The spirit couldn't have sounded any less interested, Kallian imagined.

"Oh, _come on_! Kristoff must have buttered the southern pony in his day."

"I do not believe Kristoff has ever seen a southern pony, let alone _buttered _it. What does that even mean?"

Oghren sighed, finally ready to drop the subject. "Nothing. It means nothing."

Kallian and Anders looked at each other, rolling their eyes. He scrutinized her face and stepped closer, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"You look a little tense, are you going to be okay?"

She had been rather withdrawn most of the morning, she realized, and it wasn't getting her anywhere. Kallian shook her head.

"I'm just nervous. I have a lot of 'what ifs' rolling around in my head. What if Zevran and the others..." her voice trailed off as doubt filled her.

"But we aren't talking about your average group of rogues, right? This is Zevran, Nate and Leliana, and Witchy Woman. They'll be there."

Kallian opened her mouth to say something, but instead slowed down and came to a stop.

"Ah...I think we're here." She pointed further up the road to where Lucius had stopped at a definite split in the hillside. "I guess now probably isn't the best time to ask what happens if they just kill us?" she whispered.

He groaned. "And how long have you been wondering about that? I should think the best time to ask that question would have been a few days ago."

She made a face at him and bit her lip, eyeing the hills around the trail head and what she could see beyond it, shaking her head.

Anders offered her a charming smile. "These two brutes will go in first, I'll protect us all with a shield while lobbing fireballs around, and Lucius will protect you. We'll be fine." He peered down the narrow trail, clearly trying to settle his own nerves.

Kallian let out a nervous giggle. "You aren't a very good liar. Lucius, you're with me. Let's just get on with it, but I really am hoping this was all for naught."

xXx

Zevran and his companions found it rather amusing watching Bann Esmerelle's team try to remain hidden. The nobles' armor was polished to a brilliant shine and they were clearly far too vain to dull it with mud. They were not nearly as stealthy as they must have imagined themselves to be, which provided Zevran with some relief; it would be difficult for them to lose sight of the traitors, and perhaps easier for Kallian to spot them. The soldiers and archers were, for Zevran, the real concern, and his team split into two groups to circle around them.

xXx

Anders looked down at Oghren. "Did you see that?" He spotted the sun glinting off something along the hillside ahead and to the left of their position.

"Aye, mage. You might want to put up that shield of yers." Oghren growled.

Kallian felt a rush of fear mingled with excitement as she caught sight of the flash of light. To prepare easy access to her daggers and bow, she shrugged her pack off her back and slung it over one shoulder, pulling a piece of dried fish out of a side pocket. She tried to look casual about it, but found herself wishing she had tried to learn how to better school her features. If she looked half as nervous as she felt, it would be obvious she knew something was amiss. She felt Anders's hand drop onto her shoulder and looked up at him. He let out a short laugh and shook his head.

"I think you look like I feel, Commander."

Kallian laughed gently, some of the tension leaving her. "I was afraid of that."

Even though they were anticipating an ambush, Kallian was slightly surprised when it actually happened. They came around a bend in the trail and found themselves confronted by two soldiers who formed a barrier across the trail. Bann Esmerelle, Lord Guy, and the Perrins were a short distance behind. Kallian's stomach lurched with nervousness and she wondered briefly if Zevran and the others were nearby. The sound of boots scuffing the ground on the hillsides behind them worried her, but she focused on the event unfolding before her.

Lucius growled, a low throaty sound that signalled his extreme displeasure, and moved to stand before Kallian. She reached out to pat his head and smiled.

"Bann Esmerelle, I wouldn't have expected to meet you here, of all places," Kallian said affably. "Lovely day to travel, isn't it?"

"Indeed," the bann sneered, looking rather smug.

"I would stay and chat awhile, but we are investigating reports of darkspawn in the area and should probably get moving. Would you let us pass?"

"No, I will not. We have tolerated your presence here long enough. That bastard child of Maric's has no right holding the crown and never should have given this arling to an _elf_, never mind the one who killed Rendon. I will hold you accountable for the death of Rendon Howe, if he will not."

Kallian noted that the trail was barely wide enough to accommodate all of them as it was, never mind how dangerous it would be once they started swing weapons around, and then the time for thought was gone and everyone sprung into action. The nobles stepped back, drawing daggers and short swords, while their soldiers rushed ahead to engage Justice and Oghren. Anders stayed at Kallian's back, sword and shield drawn, eyes moving between the trail ahead and the hilltops around them.

Justice used the pommel of his sword to smash one soldier's helmet off and grabbed the stunned man by his breastplate. Holding the pommel above the man's head, Justice boomed out, "This woman is with child, and we are sworn to serve her command. We will protect her at all costs. Cease this madness now and you may be spared."

There was only a moment's hesitation before the skirmish continued. Justice did not spare the soldier he was holding, killing him quickly with a crushing blow to his skull as a rain of arrows came down on them. Anders's shield held fast, slowing the arrows down so they barely penetrated their targets' armor. Lucius yelped as a few arrows embedded themselves into his left shoulder and flank, but he stood his ground before Kallian, ready to attack should anyone manage to get close to her.

Anders lobbed a fireball at two archers, killing and incinerating them within seconds. Kallian drew her bow and nocked an arrow, firing it at one of the last two archers just as a fireball hit Esmerelle's men from behind, throwing them into the air. The pair landed on the trail below their original position and fell to the ground screaming. Roots shot out of the earth and killed them both. Kallian breathed a sigh of relief; Velanna and the others were nearby.

"Thank the Maker," Anders grumbled. "The shield is weakening."

Over the din of the fight, Kallian could hear Esmerelle screaming with rage as she realized she no longer had the upper hand. Rosa appeared on the hillside, leaping down onto the trail behind the nobles, pushing Lord Guy to the ground with such force he was knocked unconscious. Rosa turned her sights on Lady Perrin next, the woman's consequent screams barely registering with Kallian.

As she prepared to fire at the nobles, Kallian caught sight of Esmerelle advancing toward the soldiers. The bann raised her hand and threw a dagger at Kallian's chest. Unable to move very far to either side because of Lucius and Anders, Kallian turned sideways and crouched down. The blade hit her helmet and she felt the tip of it pierce the edge of her ear before it shuddered to a halt. With a yelp, she pulled the weapon from her helmet and threw it aside, grinding her teeth against the pain.

Oghren bellowed as his opponent managed to get a good strike in, and then he beheaded the man, shouting, "That's for the Commander, ya lousy rotten blighter!"

Lord Perrin balked at the sight of the soldier's head rolling toward him and his hesitation gave Oghren the opportunity he needed to rush forward and knock Perrin to the ground. Planting a foot on Perrin's chest to hold him down, Oghren held his sword up, ready to swing it at Esmerelle if she advanced toward him. Lady Perrin was on her knees, one bloodied hand clutched in the other, holding back sobs, her eyes wide with fear. Kallian's eyes found Esmerelle's, and she shuddered at the cold hatred she saw there. The bann froze and pinned the Warden Commander with a withering glare.

Zevran and the others appeared along the hilltops framing the trail, and he spoke in a clear, cold voice. "It is over. Put your weapons down, now."

Esmerelle dropped both her blades, but called up to Nathaniel in an attempt to appeal to the man she thought he might be. "That elf killed your father, murdered him in his own home, and took away your birthright! She has stolen from you what is rightfully yours, and ruined the hopes and aspirations of many of us here in Amaranthine. How can you-"

Nathaniel cut her off. "My father was a misguided fool whose machinations nearly ruined this country and doomed us all, and you know nothing about the circumstances of his death. The Warden Commander was right to do what she did." He shook his head. "I cannot, for the life of me, imagine how you thought you might get away with this. You will hang for your treachery."

The bann tried to turn and run, a pointless attempt with so many eyes trained on her, and she was far too slow for Velanna's magic. Roots appeared along the trail and ensnared the woman, pinning her to the ground. Esmerelle screamed with rage and struggled, only to feel her bindings tighten around her. Gasping for want of air, she finally gave up the futile effort and went limp.

"Is everyone all right?" Anders called out to the others as he reached out to examine Kallian.

Zevran leapt down into the trail and began checking arrowheads for signs of poison, while the others helped to properly secure their prisoners.

Kallian had two arrows sticking out of the back of her armor, where her heart and left lung were. Anders pulled them both out and checked the tips for blood and poison. Finding neither, he let out a low whistle.

"We could make a fortune if you could figure out how to bottle up and sell your luck, you know?"

"Luck is only ever part of it, Anders. Your magic, Cera's runes, Wade's armor...Without those, I might as well show up in my smalls with a child's toy sword." She pulled her helmet off and took a closer look at it, happy to see that Esmerelle's blade had caused little damage.

Oghren called out that he'd been cut but could take care of himself, and proceeded to tend to a wound on his cheek. Justice said nothing, standing silently with Rosa as they both kept watch over the nobles.

Kallian flashed a wide smile at Zevran as he approached and pulled her into his arms. The concerns she'd had earlier were long forgotten, replaced with the giddy excitement of having been victorious, and she wished she could drag him off somewhere for a more private celebration.

"Are you all right?" they asked each other at the same time. Laughing, they both nodded and his lips caught hers in a heated kiss.

"I was reminded of the last time I attempted such an ambush," he breathed across her lips. "Luckily, it turned out much better for me than it will for them."

"Mmm, we'll celebrate properly tonight," Kallian whispered. "For now, I have a friend to help." She knelt down by Lucius who was sitting patiently at her her feet, and looked into the dog's eyes. "You know what we have to do, boy. Anders, can you help us with these? Hold steady, Lucius."

Anders cast a spell to dull the pain and compared the arrows that had hit the dog with those he'd removed from Kallian's armor. "Bodkin point arrowheads, cheap but hardened steel, shallow penetration..." he mumbled to himself as he worked.

Kallian recognized it as part of a lesson Nathaniel had given her on the different types of arrowheads one could use and the wounds they caused, and she was pleased to know others were seeking to make use of their colleagues' knowledge and expertise, too.

Anders removed each arrow and healed the wounds, and finally fished a mabari crunch cookie out of his potions satchel. Offering it to Lucius, he gave the dog instructions as though it were any other patient.

"Eat this and rest until Garevel and the others get here, and you should be fine to continue on with us, ser." Lucius took the cookie and began mawing it. "Ew. Um...good boy."

Kallian raised a hand to her ear. "I got hit here, too. Hurts, but it's hardly life-threatening. Check on Lady Perrin. Her hand is a bit of a mess."

Anders shook his head and peered at her ear. "A small cut. Put health poultice on it and I'll be right back."

While Anders looked after the prisoners' injuries, they were lined up against the wall of the trail and the dogs left in charge of keeping them there. Sitting at eye level with two mabari hounds seemed intimidating enough to keep the four nobles in line. Kallian and Nathaniel discussed the next steps.

Nathaniel looked at the horizon, gauging the time of day. "Captain Garevel, Petra, and their complement of guards should be here within the next couple of hours, I would think, and if we have enough ink and parchment to go around, we can prepare our statements now. We'll have Captain Garevel take everyone back to the keep for a trail. Varel will have to report the details of their crimes to King Alistair, but the right of high justice is yours. They can be tried here. They plotted against an arl; attempted to kill said arl, three Grey Wardens, and a mabari; slandered King Alistair, and called his judgement into question. They have broken their oath of fealty to you and are not loyal to the king, and for _that _they should be exiled, at the very least."

He cast a glance over at Esmerelle, who was scowling at Lady Perrin and telling the hysterical woman to keep quiet. "However, for the rest of it they must hang."

Kallian's brow pulled together and she watched the nobles for awhile before slowly nodding. "I know. It's just that it feels different, defending yourself against someone who's actively trying to kill you right then and there, as opposed to sitting down and deciding someone should die and picking a date when you'll kill them. Not something I ever imagined I'd be doing, needless to say."

"You could excuse yourself from the proceedings, let Varel or me handle things, or even ship them off to Denerim to face the king himself."

It was an easy fix to an uneasy situation, but didn't feel entirely right to Kallian. She didn't want to appear to shy away from her duties. "I will consider that. Thank you. For everything you've done today, Nate."

His eyes met his and he nodded, the corner of his mouth pulling up into a slight smile. "It is an honor, Commander. No thank yous necessary."

Kallian felt a swelling of pride as she watched Nathaniel walk away to join Justice and the others. She turned to Zevran, raising a hand to her ear again. "This is starting to sting. A lot. Do you have a health poultice?"

He opened his own back pack and pulled a kit out. "Why didn't you get Anders to look at it?"

"It's a small cut. Rosa did quite the job on Lady Perrin's hand and Oghren's cheek looks worse than this. I thought he should deal with them first."

"Heal her to execute her?" Zevran asked as he stood to look at her ear. He paused and Kallian saw a fleeting look of concern flash across his face. "Anders!" he called out, stepping closer to Kallian.

He caught sight of Anders walking toward them and snapped his fingers at the mage. "_Quickly_, my friend." Turning back to Kallian, he asked, "How did you cut your ear?"

"Esmerelle threw a dagger at me, I ducked, but it hit my...ow, it's really burning. What..."

"Maker's breath," Anders breathed, his face paling slightly.

Fear twisted in Kallian's stomach. The stinging in her ear worsened and she tried to touch it again, but Anders reached out to catch her hand. The other Wardens and Leliana were gathering around to see what the commotion was about.

Anders's grip on her hand tightened. "The dagger was poisoned, Kallian. What did you do with it?" She could feel his magic healing flowing through her, but felt none of the relief that usually followed.

"I pulled it out and dropped it. It's..." She looked around helplessly. "I dropped it. Tell me what's going on!"

Zevran began searching the ground for the dagger and a moment later held one up. "Is this it?" he asked as he inspected the tip.

"I think so...ah...yes. What..."

Zevran was on his knees at Esmerelle's side in a heartbeat, the blade pressed to her throat. "What did you use, spider or snake venom?"

She pursed her lips and tried to look away, but he gripped her chin viciously and whistled to Lucius, who came bounding over. "Tell me now, or I will cut your face with this dagger and let you sit and wait a day, maybe several, before I let Lucius slowly rip you apart for what you've done to his mistress." The hound growled, more out of confusion than understanding, but the threat worked.

"Spider," Esmerelle hissed through clenched teeth.

Zevran ran back to his back pack and began fishing around in his pack for a small pouch of antidotes. Ripping it open, he pulled out a bottle, stood, uncorked it, and forced it into her free hand.

"Drink this, now!" He waited barely a second before repeating his demand. "_Now_, tesora."

Stunned, Kallian did as she was told, gagging slightly on the foul-tasting potion. "You're scaring me, Zev. What's happened? What did she do to me?"

Zevran took her hand. "She coated her blade with spider venom, Kalli, a venom that causes necrosis of the flesh."

"Necrosis..." A tidbit of information from their days of making potions together during the Blight bubbled up from her subconscious. "_Death_? But I'm okay, right? Right?"

Anders nodded. "You are going to be fine, Kallian, but the edge of your ear..."

"What about it?" She yanked her hand free from his grasp. The burning sensation had subsided, but when she touched her ear, only her finger registered the sensation.

Velanna stepped forward, her face pinched with anger. "Part of your ear is dead and must be removed, Commander."

Kallian's eyes widened. "No! Fix it." Even as she said it, she knew by the look Anders, Zevran, and Velanna exchanged that magic would not help.

Anders shook his head. "I can't reanimate what's dead, Kallian. We've stopped the process, but we can't fix what's already gone. We have to...to amputate the dead flesh and cartilage from your ear."

She took a step backwards, her eyes gleaming with tears. She wasn't a vain woman by far, but she had always thought her ears were one of her best features. After all these months, coming through so much with no scars, she was going to lose part of what clearly defined her as an elf, and she was horrified by the thought.

"No..." The word was barely out of her mouth when Velanna waved a hand and Kallian swayed and fell into Zevran's arms, asleep.

"We do not have time to coddle the Commander," the elven mage snapped. "She must be attended to, and the sooner the better. We are running out of light. Give me a moment and I will assist you." With that, she slipped away to find her pack.

Zevran lifted Kallian into his arms and cradled her against his chest. "You will see this was for the best, tesora," he whispered to her. "And I hope you will forgive us."

* * *

A/N: My thanks to all who have read and reviewed, and who continue to keep up with me, in spite of the sporadic positing schedule. This time around, it was family stuff around the holidays and the damn Elder Scrolls V.

My beta, Mille Libri, gets huge kudos for her continued support, as do Zevgirl and Zute (who finally ran out and got Skyrim. HA!). The dialogue between Justice and Oghren is a few bits of in-game companion banter strung together, and my thanks goes to Bioware for their contribution to this story.

Please do leave a review or comments, as it is fun and motivating to hear from you. Our Kallian's luck is beginning to take a turn...Happy new year to you all. Cheers!


	19. Business as Usual

**Business as Usual**

4 Haring, 9:30

Kallian came slowly out of the darkness of magic-induced sleep. Zevran was at her side, an arm around her, when her increased restlessness woke him. He watched her for a moment before reaching out a hand to stroke her face and kissing her cheek lightly. He wanted to be sure he was there when she awoke fully, to reassure her that everything would be all right.

As Kallian became more aware, memories of her last few waking moments came back to her. Her mind was full of questions, and the one she least wanted to ask was demanding to be answered. _What do I look like now?_A moment later she remembered Esmerelle and wanted to strangle the woman to death, then she recalled the way she brushed off Anders's ministrations, Velanna waving a hand at her to knock her out. Anger, fear, and a despair she hadn't felt since leaving the alienage with Duncan filled her and finally spilled over. She turned away from Zevran, curling up into a tight ball.

"Tesora," he whispered, snuggling closer to spoon around her. "It is all right."

"No it isn't," she sobbed, her whole body shaking. She rarely cried like this and her anguish broke Zevran's heart.

He propped himself up so he could see her face and found himself looking down at her bandaged ear with a twinge of guilt. Guilt had been present in good measure after Velanna put Kallian to sleep. Anders began beating himself up almost immediately for not insisting Kallian allow him to look at the injury; Zevran was angry with himself for not checking on her first; Oghren drank himself to sleep, which was, contrary to popular opinion, a rare thing; Leliana was distressed and restless; even Nathaniel seemed to be feeling some responsibility for Kallian's injury. Lucius was being especially protective of his mistress and hadn't strayed more than a few feet from her side in hours. Rosa stayed close as well and even now was seated outside the bedroom door. Zevran wondered for a moment if all of this would make Kallian feel better or worse.

"Papae always said I had m-my m-mother's ears," she cried into her pillow.

Zevran realized that this wasn't just about losing a piece of her body, or part of something that defined her as an elf. Kallian's ears were, for her, a connection to her mother.

"Kalli, tesora. There is nothing I can say or do to take your pain away. I can only assure you that you are as beautiful now as you were yesterday, and no one thinks any differently of you. This is a difficult thing you are going through, but you are no less a woman, an elf, or your mother's child. Remember that."

"So stupid...should have let Anders check it. How...much..." Her child stirred within her, the faint flutter of movement bringing her a measure of comfort.

"Not as much as you might think. You will see when we remove the bandages. Anders's quick reaction and my antidote spared you a much more serious injury. I hope you are not too upset with Velanna. Her approach may leave something to be desired, but she was right, we had to proceed quickly. Her attitude proved very useful in the field. She helped Anders a great deal."

Kallian reached a hand up to her ear and touched the bandages gingerly. Her ear was numb, but she couldn't tell much else through the wrappings.

"Velanna put a salve on your ear to numb it, prevent infection, and help the healing process," he explained when he saw the perplexed expression on her face.

The poison had spread in a pattern matching the shape of the blade, a small dagger with a slight spine to it. Striking her ear as it had, the blade along the length of it, they had to sacrifice a two-inch-long portion of the edge, going about one third of that distance in toward the center of her ear at the widest point of the wound.

"It could have been so much worse, tesora. What if that dagger had sunk deeper, into your neck, or hit you elsewhere, Kalli? Your face, or chest?" His voice tightened at the thought of what any of those alternatives would have meant for them all, and he wrapped himself around her again, burying his face in her hair.

She rubbed his arm, and they lay together for a while as her tears subsided and her breathing evened out again. Finally, Kallian spoke.

"Where are we, Zev?" She wanted to think about something else, anything else.

"A farmhouse not far from the trail head. You would have passed it on the way here. The owners were very kind to offer us use of their entire home for as long as we need it. They were headed north to be with family. The darkspawn activity in the area has made them nervous."

He explained that Captain Garevel, Petra, a complement of ten soldiers, and the other Wardens were bedded down in other rooms in the house or out in the barn, keeping watch on the prisoners who were bound together in a tack room. They were protected from the elements, they were not entirely uncomfortable, and they had been given water and food. To that end, Garevel had adhered to Kallian's wishes regarding the treatment of prisoners, but he made no effort to hide his contempt for them once he knew the full extent of their deeds. Zevran did not mention that Velanna confessed to dabbling in shape shifting magic and had changed into a giant spider to terrorize the nobles into settling down and keeping quiet.

Kallian climbed out of bed and stretched her arms and legs, giving Lucius a pat on the head as he sat up at her side.

The fire in the small hearth had died down and she reached for her cloak to protect herself from the cold, crossing the room to peer out a small window. Just appearing over the horizon, the sun's golden light caught ice crystals in the air and frost on the ground. The world before her glittered brilliantly, but she couldn't appreciate the beauty of it and she closed her eyes against the glare of light. Zevran watched her for a moment before stoking the fire and joining her.

"I hope the family was compensated for their generosity." Kallian said absentmindedly.

"We did give them several sovereigns." he replied as he put his arms around her.

She stiffened momentarily, and he tried not to take it personally. Even with his Crow training, he could not begin to imagine how losing a piece of himself would affect him. As she relaxed and settled back against him, he kissed her neck.

"This will take time, Kallian."

Nodding, she turned to him and rested her head against his chest. "We should get ready to go back to Knotwood Hills."

Zevran's brow wrinkled with concern. "You do not wish to take a day to..."

Kallian adopted the proverbial 'stiff upper lip' as she stepped away from him and began to pull her equipment together. "I don't want to waste time dwelling on things that cannot be changed, Zev."

"No one will object if you..."

"_I _object," Kallian interrupted, a bit too firmly. Pausing, she took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. This isn't your fault, it isn't anyone's fault but Esmerelle's. I just need to...to stay on task. We have work to do and it cannot wait."

He nodded, watching her carefully. She was struggling to maintain this 'business as usual' facade, he knew, but arguing with her would be counterproductive. Zevran understood Kallian, knew she needed to be in control of something, _doing _something. She had never been one to wallow in grief and pity for long, and all he could do was hope she came through this as she had past challenges.

"As you wish, tesora."

They packed their things and helped each other with their armor. When they were ready to go downstairs, Zevran paused at the doorway and slid his arm around Kallian's waist. "The others have all been concerned about you and they may have their own opinions about what you should be doing right now. They mean well."

Kallian offered him a weak smile. "I'm all right." It was a lie, they both knew it, but Kallian appreciated that Zevran simply nodded and opened the door for her.

They ran into Nathaniel first. He took in her armed and armored appearance and nodded curtly to her.

"Commander. You wish to get moving?"

"Yes, I do. I'd like you to please ask Garevel to make sure the prisoners are taken back to the keep immediately, and held for trial upon our return. Varel will know what to do in terms of notifying King Alistair about all of this. I want you to handle the entire affair, as you see fit."

Nathaniel raised an eyebrow questioningly as he spoke. "I will hold them all equally accountable for the entire plot, including your injury and the danger their attack posed to your unborn child."

She knew he was asking if she understood that he would show no mercy for any of the conspirators, and she met his gaze, nodding firmly. "As you see fit, Nathaniel. When you're finished with Garevel, please get the others ready to go."

"Yes, Commander. Petra wanted to see you before she returned to the keep and asked that I let you know, if I saw you first."

"Please let her know I'm here and waiting." She sighed with relief as he turned and left, grateful that Nathaniel's training as a nobleman's son and his service in the Free Marches predisposed him to respect the chain of command.

She got a different reaction from Leliana and Anders, who were in the kitchen preparing a large pot of porridge with nuts and dried fruit. Anders stopped what he was doing, looking stricken; Leliana was her usual bright and cheery self, but it felt forced to Kallian.

"Mon amie," the bard cooed as she embraced Kallian and kissed her cheeks. "You wish to go to Knotwood Hills today, yes? You must eat." She began dishing up a bowl of porridge.

Anders stepped forward, concern and uncertainty etched in ever line of his face. "You don't want take a day?"

Kallian swallowed against the swell of irritation she could feel building within her and shook her head. "No, I don't. We have a job to do, Anders, and I just want to get on with it and go home."

"But..."

Kallian sighed and put her hand up, her tone taking a sharper edge. "I appreciate your concern, and I imagine everyone will have an opinion about what I should do today, but the darkspawn don't 'take a day'. We've taken enough days, put off investigating Knotwood Hills long enough. I'm fine, the baby is fine, we need to get moving, so I'd like to have something to eat and just get on with it. Okay?"

She finished talking and realized her jaw was clenched and her hands were balled into fists. Uncurling her hands and pressing them together to crack her knuckles, she looked around the room. Petra, Velanna, and Oghren had entered the house with Nathaniel, and everyone was looking at her. She felt weary

"I want everyone ready to leave within the hour. Understood?" She took a bowl of porridge and a spoon from Leliana and sat down to eat.

After a moment's pause, the others followed suit. Zevran, Leliana, and Petra sat at the kitchen table with Kallian, while the rest took their breakfast outside to a fire where the keep's soldiers were preparing their own meals. Kallian watched Anders as he left, avoiding her gaze, and she regretted being so sharp with him.

"I can't say that went particularly well," she muttered after a few mouthfuls of porridge.

Petra shrugged and offered Kallian a sympathetic smile. "What you're going through is a personal matter. We can imagine how we would feel, or what we would do, in your situation, but this isn't about us. It's natural for people who care about you to want to help, to try to reach out to you the way they might want to be approached. In the end, however, you will deal with this in your own way, and you need the time and space to do it. They will come to understand this."

When they finished eating and had cleaned up after themselves, Petra gestured to Kallian and Zevran as the others left the house. "Why don't we sit for a moment, have a quick check up, and then be on our way?"

Kallian sat down with some reluctance. Now that her mind was made up to keep moving and try to distract herself with her work, she was more than anxious to get going. All the same, her child's health was a concern for her and she let Petra examine her with magic, answering questions about her mood, her back, and how she was feeling in general.

"I am concerned about you and you will hear me out, Commander," Petra warned as Kallian sighed with annoyance.

"You and your boy are well, but you are anxious and upset. That's understandable, considering what you've been through, but you can't just push your feelings aside and bury your head in your work. That sort of coping will eventually come back on you in the form of one health problem or another, which could affect your child."

Petra looked from Kallian to Zevran and back, smiling. "Try to take it easy, as much as you can given the task before you. Delegate responsibility, avoid the front lines if possible, and continue to love and support one another."

"Is it that simple?" Kallian asked, watching the soldiers and Wardens milling about outside the kitchen window.

"I didn't say it would be _easy_, but yes, it is that simple." Petra stood up, indicating the interview was over. "I don't want to keep you any longer, Kallian. Zevran, take care."

Zevran stood and took Petra's hand in his. "Thank you, Petra. We should all be on our way, yes?"

Kallian stood, reaching out to give Petra a hug, emotion making her throat tight. "Thank you, Petra. I will try to heed your advice."

The mage embraced Kallian tightly, her affection for the young woman evident in her smile. "Be well, Kallian, and take care of yourself. I will see you back at the keep." Petra slipped out of the kitchen, leaving Kallian and Zevran alone.

Kallian's emotions and sense of duty were at war with one another. That sense of duty was making her put one foot in front of the other to get her to the door of the farmhouse. Part of her, though, did want to crawl back into bed and stay there for as long as it took for her anger and grief to go away. She wanted to scream, yell, pitch a fit and cry. She wanted to run her daggers through Esmerelle, but not for maiming her, or very nearly killing her. Esmerelle had endangered her unborn child and that was the least forgivable of her crimes. Most disturbing for Kallian, however, was a thought that had occurred to her during breakfast. _How would Garevel and his men treat these nobles, if given free rein? _She knew she did care, that she couldn't compromise the treatment of any one prisoner in her dungeons, but she simply could not bring herself to push the thought from her mind completely and it made her stomach churn. She was startled out of her thoughts as Zevran took her hand.

"Tesora? Are you ready?"

She nodded, turning to Zevran. Looking into his eyes, she stepped closer to him and slipped her arms around his waist. "I don't know what I'd do without you, Zev, or them, really." She nodded her head toward the others, her eyes filled with tears.

He took her face in his hands and kissed her tenderly before pulling her into another embrace. "Ti amo, tesora. We will get through this. Remember, you do not need to bear your burdens alone. We are all here to help you, and I think it is safe to say that each and every person out there would lay down their life for you." He pulled a handkerchief from a pocket within his armor and wiped her cheeks dry.

Kallian let out a short laugh and swatted his hand away. "I'm not a child, Zev."

"No, you most certainly are not, mia moglie." Holding the handkerchief to her nose, he said, "Blow."

She burst out laughing then, and took the handkerchief from him so she could blow her nose herself. "Okay, I guess it's time to face the troops."

They left the kitchen and stepped out into the yard. Garevel had secured the prisoners in the wagon and was speaking with Nathaniel, while Velanna sat next to Esmerelle, whispering to her. Kallian thought the former bann looked particularly pale and ill, and quickly decided she didn't care what the elven mage was up to. Petra and Anders were huddled together, in a serious looking conversation. Everyone else appeared to be ready to leave and looked to Kallian as she appeared around the corner of the farmhouse.

"Ah...right. Wardens, you're with me, all of you. We will draw more attention with so many of us going in at once, but we should be able to take care of this quickly. Leliana, are you with us, too?"

Leliana came to Kallian's side. "It would be an honor to fight with you again, mon amie."

She smiled. "Thank you, Leli. The more the merrier. All right everybody, Garevel and Petra brought additional provisions for us and I gather we've got permission to take what we need from this family's cellar, so let's stock up and go. We'll need enough rations for a few days, I expect."

Zevran squeezed Kallian's hand and went with the others to organize rations, while Garevel and Petra stayed with her. The captain regarded Kallian with a look of admiration and respect, and something of a question in his eyes.

"I'm not saying you have to be _nice_ to them, Captain, but treat them as you would any other prisoner. No special treatment."

"Absolutely, Commander. I suspect we will have to house them _deeper _in the dungeons, given the number of people we have incarcerated at the moment."

The lower dungeons hadn't received any attention since Kallian had arrived at the keep and they were a complete mess. Garevel knew this, and by the gleam in his eye she knew he was enjoying the thought of leaving the nobles there amongst the dirt, debris, and cobwebs.

"Is that so? Well, as I said, no special treatment. If they don't wish to spend the rest of their days living in squalor, they can clean their quarters themselves. I won't have my staff waiting on them." As an afterthought, she added, "And make sure you keep them apart physically, as far apart as you can. None of them will have the comfort of another's touch in their final days."

It seemed a terrible thing to do, to the Perrins at least, for she knew if she and Zevran were both imprisoned and kept out of arm's reach, she would be horribly distraught. Garevel nodded, the slight smile on his lips sending a spike of guilt through Kallian. She quashed it, convincing herself the traitors deserved whatever they got now. They alone were responsible for this fall from grace, and she would give them time to consider just how far they had fallen.

"As you wish, Commander." He turned to face her and crossed an arm over his chest, bowing at the waist. "Safe travels. We will see you upon your return to the keep."

He waited for Petra to say her good-byes and then escorted the mage back to the wagon, where he helped her up onto the bench seat and gave orders to the men and women he had with him. A clap of thunder sounded out as the horses pulled the wagon out of the yard and if Kallian were in a better mood, she would have laughed at the wretched look on Esmerelle's face as the rain began to fall. Instead, she raised a hand and waved it dismissively in the woman's direction. _May the Maker take pity upon your soul, because I certainly won't._

xXx

The walk back to the scene of the ambush took less than an hour. Kallian's heart raced as they passed through the area where they'd fought Esmerelle and her allies, and a memory of the disgraced bann throwing the dagger at her flashed through her mind. Emotions raged within Kallian, but she kept an even pace and within several minutes, the trail opened up into a new landscape. Everything was withered and dead. The gnarled trees were bare and the rains had made the earth quite muddy. Kallian stopped and stared at what she saw.

She finally managed, "I guess that's it."

The others gathered around her, taking in the scene. Rivulets of water ran past them, down the slope of the trail, and over the edge of a monstrous hole in the ground. A bridge had been built across it, leading to another narrow passageway that twisted to the left, out of sight. From where she stood, Kallian could see old stonework along the edge of the chasm. She pointed it out to Oghren.

"Does that look dwarven to you?"

The warrior grunted and went to the edge of the hole. "Yup."

Kallian joined him, careful not to get too close to the chasm, and peered down. The stone work she stood on was very reminiscent of the tiles she'd seen in Orzammar, and from what she could see in the chasm, this appeared to be another ruin.

"Right." She turned to look back at her companions. "Into the hole we go."

There was a murmuring of consent and the group began to drift off toward the bridge over the chasm. Zevran and Velanna stayed behind to walk with Kallian.

"Commander," Velanna began, sounding uncertain of herself for the first time since she'd joined the Wardens.

"Yes?"

Velanna dropped her voice, keeping an eye on the others ahead of them. "I think you should talk to the mage...Anders...talk to Anders."

Kallian looked for Anders and noticed he was apart from the rest of the group and was slowing down to stare into the pit he was about to enter. His fear of enclosed spaces was something she didn't think Velanna knew about, however, and she was curious why the elven mage was concerned about him.

"Why?"

Velanna sighed, frustration and annoyance flickering across her face. "Tch. He respects you a great deal and feels he has failed you somehow. I am finding his moping to be rather annoying."

Zevran nodded. "It is true, Kallian, he is moping."

She groaned and looked back at Anders. "I was a bit snappish at him earlier," she conceded.

"You were," Velanna agreed. "But he was meddling in your affairs, it was understandable."

Kallian rolled her eyes. "Thank you for helping, Velanna. If you don't mind?" She gestured for Velanna to cross over the chasm.

The mage huffed and stalked off, saying something to Anders as she walked past him. He was shaking his head with a confused expression on his face when Kallian and Zevran caught up to him. Zevran gave Kallian's hand a squeeze and continued walking.

"Could I talk to you for a minute, Anders?"

"Of course, Commander. Look, I owe you an apology. For yesterday-"

"No, Anders, you don't." Kallian cut him off and put a hand on his arm. "Esmerelle did this to me and I was the fool who didn't stop to think that maybe she was _that_ devious. Pfft. That goes _beyond _foolish. The woman was there to kill me, everything about her should have been viewed as a threat. I should have known." She clenched her jaw and let out a huff of air. "I'm the one who owes you an apology. I should have let you examine me. It wouldn't have changed the fact that I was poisoned, but you could have stopped its progress sooner. I won't make that mistake again, and I trust you won't let me."

That got a grin out of the mage and Kallian smiled up at him. "You're more than one of my Wardens, or a brother in arms. You're my friend, Anders, you know that. I'm just...I'm...reacting, but I shouldn't be taking it out on my friends. I'm sorry I was hard on you earlier. Forgive me?"

Anders nodded, looking incredibly relieved. "Of course, of course."

Kallian nodded and stared down into the chasm. Anders followed her gaze and they were silent for a moment.

"Remember to breathe, Anders, and we'll get through this just fine." She was saying it as much to herself as to Anders, and after a few deep breaths, she steered them toward the other side of the chasm.

xXx

Kallian ran down the sloping stone street toward the noise; the others trailed behind, weapons still drawn and bloodied from their run in with a large group of deep stalkers. Kallian skidded around the corner to see five darkspawn retreating, dragging a young woman along behind them. Her stomach turned as she saw the woman struggle to free herself.

"Don't let them take her!" she screamed at the top of her lungs. A split second later, arrows and two fireballs shot past her, Oghren and Justice charged ahead, and Zevran disappeared into the shadows along the walls.

The young woman, a dwarf wearing Legion of the Dead armor, made another attempt to kick herself free and succeeded, just as the beast dragging her realized they were being followed. She ran a short distance away from the darkspawn, snatched up a war axe, and assumed a defensive stance, barely aware of the others gathering around her. With six Wardens, Zevran, Leliana, the dwarven woman, and two mabari, the battle was short. Before long, they were standing amongst the dead darkspawn, while Anders checked on Kallian and the others. He paused at the Legionnaire's side and looked down at her as she finished dusting herself off and collected her weapons.

"Ah..." he began.

The young woman cut him off, addressing Kallian. "Well...that was...close. For a moment there, I thought I was really about to join the Legion of the Dead."

Kallian stepped closer, somewhat surprised by the woman's demeanor. "Are you all right?" she asked.

"Um...yes. Yes, I think so."

"My name's Kallian, and you are...?"

"Sigrun, Legionnaire Scout. We were sent into the Deep Roads to battle the darkspawn until the Stone claims us. Which it did - with great efficiency - today."

"The darkspawn are after you?"

Sigrun nodded. "I'm sure they intended to turn me into a broodmother. They do that..."

Kallian raised her hand. "No need to explain. I understand."

Sigrun looked over her shoulder toward where the darkspawn had been taking her. "Anyway, I can't chat for long. I should probably go back, as foolish as that sounds, and see if there is anything else I can do."

Kallian's companions were all making disapproving noises or trying to speak up, but she waved them off. "What's going on, Sigrun?"

"The old fortress of Kal'Hirol...there's something going on there. I think the darkspawn are breeding an army. The Legion went to investigate, but Kal'Hirol proved too much for us. It was a massacre, and now I...I'm the only one left."

Sigrun's loss and the sadness in her voice touched Kallian deeply, as did the idea of the darkspawn breeding an army. She could help the woman, it would be a mutually beneficial effort. And if Sigrun was the last of her group, perhaps she'd be willing to join the Grey Wardens.

"These darkspawn must be eradicated."

Sigrun nodded. "That's what we thought. 'Oh, we'll just run in there, eradicate the darkspawn, and be back in time for supper.' Well..." she shrugged. "Whoops. The darkspawn have changed, they're smart now. They destroyed the Legion. I saw them taking some of the women and I wasn't staying around for that."

A chill ran down Kallian's spine. _Eighth day, we hate it as she is violated. _She was hardly surprised she remembered it, the poem Branka's lover Hespith had been reciting when they'd found her during their search for the Anvil of the Void. It had haunted her dreams for weeks, long after they'd left the Deep Roads.

"Good idea," she mumbled to Sigrun. "Look, we're Grey Wardens." She pointed around to her Grey Wardens, Leliana, and Zevran, introducing them one by one. "We're here to investigate the area."

"Huh," Sigrun replied, putting her hands on hips and staring at Kallian. "The ancestors must have had a hand in this. I'll show you where Kal'Hirol is. Safety in numbers, yes?" She was suddenly bright and cheerful again, and looked to be ready for an adventure.

Kallian found herself liking this perky dwarf. "Absolutely."

Sigrun smiled broadly. "Excellent! With your help, destroying the nest is no longer impossible, merely...improbable! Let`s not waste time. Kal'Hirol awaits, and darkspawn, when left to their own devices, get up to all kinds of nonsense."

Nathaniel cleared his throat. "Perhaps you should let the Warden Commander lead this expedition."

Kallian smiled and waved off Sigrun's unspoken apology. "I couldn't have said it better. Let's get organized and head down."

As they gathered their things and prepared to descend further into the ground, Zevran joined Kallian and Lucius at the edge of the group.

"What do you think of this woman?" he whispered.

"Hm. There is a sadness beneath all that cheeriness, but I think she will be a good asset to the team. Legionnaire Scout, rogue, familiar with the Deep Roads...and where will she go after this, back to Orzammar on her own? She wouldn't survive. I can't allow that to happen, when I need more Wardens."

He nodded, watching as Oghren approached the Legionnaire. "And would you like to wager any money on how long it will take Oghren to attempt to bed her?"

Kallian chuckled. "He may have already tried."

Sigrun was stomping in their direction, a somewhat perturbed look on her face. Kallian took that as her cue to get the group moving again.

_A broodmothers' nest. A potential recruit. It is shaping up to be another interesting day in the life of a Fereldan Warden,_ Kallian thought as she led the group onward.

* * *

A/N: Welcome back! RL sort of gave me a bit of a kick in the head, but I think I am back into the swing of things. I have minor surgery coming up, so posts might be delayed as I deal with the situation.

As always, a nod to BioWare for their universe, in particular for the dialogue with Sigrun at the end, which comes straight from the game, with a few lines from me. I'd also like to thank my beta reader, Mille Libre (I did tinker a bit with this after she returned it to me), my gal pals Zevgirl and Zute, and everyone who reads this story and comments/alerts/faves. Thank you! I love hearing from you, so please feel free to review/comment. Cheers!


	20. Roasted Meat for the Walk

**Roasted Meat for the Walk**

Kallian led her team deeper into the earth, a growing sense of unease gnawing at her. With each step they took, the air grew ever staler, and with it came the smell of death and decay. Something else was there, too, leaving a metallic taste on the tip of her tongue. _Lyrium_, she decided at last. The sand they'd found in the silverite mines in Wending Woods had done that to her. Whatever variety of lyrium they might find in Kal'Hirol, it was there to be found, she was certain. Kallian couldn't help but notice the familiar fleshy pink growth she was seeing with increasing regularity along their path, and she struggled to not dwell on what it meant. Strands of it clung to the walls; bulbous, pulsating blobs of it dotted the road ahead. She had seen this very thing in the Deep Roads during the Blight when they had searched for the paragon Branka.

Darkspawn were everywhere, but it was hard for Kallian to distinguish what, exactly she sensed. More adept now at honing in on her Wardens, she knew where they were during a fight, and she could list the variety of beasts that were approaching, but not today. Today, it felt as though there were dozens upon dozens of the beasts all around them, and yet it was difficult to figure if that was the case. She could feel something...really big. A disturbing thought briefly crossed her mind. Ogres felt large. _Am I sensing a group of ogres?_ Her eyes wandered to more of the fleshy substance along the road ahead. _Or is it_...her stomach lurched and she tried to push the unfinished thought to the back of her mind.

She looked to her Wardens. Oghren and Justice were out front. Justice seemed completely unaffected by his surroundings and instead looked to be _listening _to something. The dwarf's head, however, moved back and forth as he scanned the area ahead. His hands hung at his sides, fingers twitching, ready to grab his axe at a moment's notice, and he rolled his shoulders frequently. Velanna and Nathaniel each repeated the motion as they searched the shadows around them. Leliana and Zevran, of course, could not feel the darkspawn presence, but past experience and the palpable tension emanating from the Wardens had them on edge. Lucius and Rosa, as alert as ever, were staying close to Anders, who was pale and sweating, a few paces behind her and Zevran. Kallian reached for Zevran's hand and gave it a quick squeeze before dropping back to walk along side Anders. She reached out and scratched Lucius behind the ears.

"Hi," Anders said, his eyes scanning the road ahead.

"I'd ask how you're doing, but I can see you aren't well. Can't you do something for yourself?"

He let out a short laugh. "You mean spell myself to sleep for the duration of the mission? Knowing Oghren, I'd wake up on a ship bound for Orlais, dressed in nothing by my small clothes." When she giggled, he looked at her sternly. "What? That's exactly the sort of thing he thinks is funny."

"Is there anything I can do for you?" she asked.

Anders laughed again. "Don't leave me alone and unconscious with Oghren. Ever." His smile faded suddenly and his eyes widened. Kallian looked back at the road ahead of them.

The road came to an abrupt end, dropping off suddenly where it had collapsed and eroded away. Sigrun waved her hand at the vista before them as the others gathered around her.

"I don't know much about Kal'Hirol, except what others from the Legion told me. It used to be important, a center of learning for the smith caste. When the fortress was lost, a lot of what the smiths learned was lost with it. They've never built anything like Kal'Hirol since."

From where they stood, they could see a pond of water below them, and beyond that a maze of dwarven construction. Walls and buildings in various stages of decay spread out before them. It was like the thaigs Kallian had seen in Orzammar, every bit as grandiose even if it did look much older.

Zevran, Kallian, Leliana, and Oghren exchanged knowing glances and then looked back down to the ground around them. "Tesora, we have seen this before."

"I _know_. Ugh." she replied with a grimace. When the others looked to her for an explanation, she took a deep breath and kicked at a tendril of the fleshy substance. "This is a pretty good indication that the darkspawn are breeding here. It's...not a pretty sight."

Velanna paled slightly, clearly thinking of her sister, and Anders groaned. "Lovely. Just lovely," he mumbled, tugging at his armor.

"I think we can get down the hill over there." Kallian pointed to their left where a thin stream of water made its way down a slope. Adjusting her pack on her shoulders, she led them onward.

Navigating the slippery slope proved tricky, and Kallian could tell Anders was considering the possibility that they wouldn't be able to get back up it, when Sigrun let out a gasp. She raced down the hill to a male dwarf on the ground ahead of them where the road began to level out again.

"It's Jukka. He's hurt! Bad..." she shouted as she skidded to a halt and dropped to her knees at his side.

"S-Sigrun?"

"Yes, it's me. Be still and try not to talk."

Kallian looked to Anders and Velanna. "There must be something we can do."

Jukka coughed, shaking his head even as Anders did the same, a wisp of blue light reaching out toward the dwarf. "No, I feel my death upon me and it is a sweet release."

Sigrun began digging in a pouch she had at her waist. "No, I have bandages-"

"You...you must listen." Jukka grabbed Sigrun's hand. "The...the broodmothers. They're breeding. I saw an army. You must...you must stop them. But...beware...beware the children. They are abominations, even among darkspawn."

"What? What children? Whose children?" Sigrun leaned closer to her friend to hear what he might say.

"Forgive me." He took one last, ragged breath and collapsed to the floor.

"Ancestors look kindly upon you, brother," Sigrun whispered as she bowed her head. She drew her fingers over his eyes to close them, and let her hand linger on Jukka's cheek for a moment before she took a deep breath and stood. Squaring her shoulders, she pulled herself together. "We have to finish what the Legion started. Those broodmothers must be destroyed."

Oghren sighed. "Poor sod. Never thought I'd see the Legion so thoroughly trounced. And what was that about broodmothers? A hive of tits and tentacles. Sounds like a party and we're invited!" He took a liberal swig from his flask.

Kallian felt sick and brought a hand to her mouth. _Broodmothers. More than one. Maker. _Anders sent a wave of mild healing magic through her. Stomach settled, she smiled weakly and motioned to the others to keep moving. Sigrun continued to walk at her side, the scout's eyes roaming back and forth across the road ahead.

"Let's see what this is all about," Kallian said with determination as they descended deeper into the ground.

xXx

Before long, they ran into their first group of darkspawn. A small group of hurlocks, easily beaten and hardly a challenge for them. After a quick clashing of blades and a few fireballs, they were dead and Kallian's group continued. Something darted across the road ahead of them, giving her pause. It had been small and low to the ground, a young spider, perhaps. She shrugged it off, mindful of the shifting pull of the taint within her veins.

"More darkspawn ahead," she hissed, and they spotted several led by an alpha genlock.

Kallian, Leliana, and Nathaniel were able to thin their numbers to one in fairly short order and Oghren beheaded the last of them with a mighty roar. The beasts had potions and the occasional useful or valuable item in their pockets, and the companions took everything worth taking. After following the meandering streets to a bridge over an underground river, they stopped. A great fort dominated the landscape on the other side of the river.

"That's it," Sigrun whispered.

They crossed the bridge with some caution, and soon found themselves in a courtyard of sorts, facing off against a trio of deep stalkers. In such small numbers, the creatures were quite easy to deal with. Rosa and Lucius each grabbed one by the neck, shaking them to death quickly, while Anders set fire to the third. Buoyed by how well things were going thus far, they met a nasty surprise as they climbed up to the gates of Kal'Hirol proper. Kallian and the Wardens had barely managed to discern that more darkspawn were headed in their direction when a large group of hurlocks poured out of the courtyard to confront them.

Now that Kallian was attempting to rely more on archery, she stayed at the back of the group with Leliana, looking for higher ground from which to shoot. She climbed up onto the main gate and quickly killed the only archer amongst the darkspawn, before trying to focus on the skirmish below. Oghren and Justice were in the thick of the fight, swinging their blades in wide arcs back and forth, while Nathaniel and Zevran danced around the edges of the enemy, stabbing or nearly decapitating them from behind. Anders and Velanna hung back on either side of their companions, casting healing and destruction spells with alarming proficiency, and the dogs herded the darkspawn toward their human friends and ripped the beasts to shreds from behind. When the fight ended, Kallian took time to look around the courtyard to assess the situation before jumping down from the gate. She noticed two corpses that had been there when they forced these darkspawn back through the gates of Kal'Hirol.

She wouldn't normally pay much attention to such things; they came across corpses of all varieties all the time. But if there was one thing she could say for the darkspawn, it was that they were reasonably predictable and wore the same kind of armor. Hurlocks all dressed alike, genlocks dressed the same..._They wear uniforms, _Kallian snickered._ And that's armor I've never seen before._

Nathaniel had seen the same thing. "Interesting. A new form of darkspawn?" he asked.

Anders came over for a closer look. "Why would we be seeing new forms of darkspawn? This isn't a blight."

Sigrun reached out and put a hand on Kallian's arm, distracting her from the matter of the 'new' darkspawn.

Pointing to the main entrance of the fort, a long flight of stairs up to a large, very solid-looking door, the dwarf sighed. "The Legion got this far with no trouble. We got careless and complacent and stormed the main entrance, up those stairs. It was a disaster. The darkspawn were waiting. They turned the thaig's old defences against us."

"Traps?"

Sigrun nodded. "And more. Ancient dwarven ingenuity, used against us by the very monsters it was intended to kill. We need to learn from the Legion's mistake. Avoid the main door."

"Hmm. I ran into my fair share of traps in the thaigs we visited in the Deep Roads during the Blight. Poisonous gas, arrows, fire, golems..." _Branka_. Kallian forced herself to stand a little straighter as she spoke. She felt a little weak in the knees at the thought of going through those kinds of trials again, but she didn't want anyone else to know it. Instead, she shrugged. "I assume there's another way in?"

Sigrun's head bobbed up and down enthusiastically. "Most of the old dwarven fortresses have hidden side entrances. I bet this one does too, we just have to find it."

They began to move forward when they heard it, a skittering noise. It reminded Kallian of the many times she had run into giant spiders in the Deep Roads and the tunnels below Amaranthine. But this sounded like far more than she had ever encountered at once, and it sent shivers down her spine.

"What is that?" Velanna shrieked, shooting a fireball ahead of them.

Kallian didn't have to wonder what horrible thing might make Velanna scream, she could see it for herself. They were set upon by a good number of a strange and terrifying creature that none of them had seen before, a larvae-like beast with more legs than Kallian thought was necessary. The things had sharp teeth and claws, and were surprisingly ferocious. Kallian had to assume that these were the 'children' Jukka had spoken of, and shouted out her thoughts on the matter as she literally ran back up the wall to perch on the gate. Velanna had set several on fire, but they weren't dying, and so the Wardens and their friends were faced with flaming grubs. Kallian and Leliana focused their efforts on those beasts first, quickly discovering that their arrows were, for the most part, bouncing off the creatures' backs or barely penetrating their hides.

"The...face," Leliana called out. "I think we must aim for their faces."

That proved to be a better tactic, but required a great deal of concentration. Kallian tried to ignore the sounds of claws scratching and teeth snapping, repeatedly nocking arrows, aiming, shooting.

"A little help here!" Anders shouted as three of the grubs ran at him. Lightning turned one to a twitching, sizzling mass as Rosa and Lucius rushed to his aid and began ripping at the grubs with their claws, giving Anders time to get away.

Shouting drew Kallian's attention further away and her heart stopped. Two grubs had managed to corner Zevran. He put one down, a quick stab to its face with a poisoned blade. The other, however, latched onto his arm and succeeded in bringing him down. Kallian dropped down off the gate and ran to Zevran, oblivious to Leliana' protests, abandoning her bow and arrows for her short swords. Lucius kept an eye on Anders, but Rosa had turned her attention back to the courtyard and charged to Zevran's defense as well.

Kallian hadn't thought of what she would do when she reached Zevran, and once there she realized she wasn't well equipped to deal with the grub. It was far larger than she had first thought it to be. It scrambled to get to Zevran's face, its blunt back end wriggling back and forth at his knees while its horribly ugly mouth full of jagged teeth snapped just above his chest, trying to grab hold of his arms. Dropping one sword to the ground, she gripped the other with both hands and swung at the grub with all of her strength. She got lucky and managed to catch the monster in a weak spot at what might be its neck, and sent it flying a few feet away, where Rosa quickly dispatched of it.

Kallian reached a hand out to help Zevran up, grateful he only appeared to have a few scratches, and barely caught the look on his face as he shouted "Tesora!" before she felt something hurtle at her and push her to the ground. Rolling away, she wound up on her knees, at eye level with it. Claws clicked and scraped at the ground, teeth gnashed, and its legs...Quite suddenly, a memory flashed through Kallian's mind, a vision of herself as a child, flailing her arms about and screaming, trying desperately to shake off the centipedes Soris had thrown into her hair. She scrambled backwards, crab-walking away, wondering if she was the one screaming, when a giant spider appeared out of nowhere, knocking the grub aside and skewering it through the middle with a long claw. She stared, mouth agape, as the spider's body shimmered and shifted, turning into Velanna.

Zevran leapt up and rushed to Kallian's side, mindful that Oghren stood only a few steps away now, dispatching the last of the grubs with a heavy downward swing of his axe. Kallian shrieked again at the sight of the thing's legs twitching as it died. Pulling her up onto her feet, Zevran gave her a little shake and gripped her chin.

"Kallian, tesora! It is over." He checked her for injuries. "Are you all right? Are you injured. Kalli?"

She was panting, trying to push back the wave of panic that lingered, but all she could think of was two very long centipedes crawling around in her hair. The rest of her party were gathering around, checking on each other, and Anders came to her side, magic reaching out to sense any injuries. Kallian pushed him away.

"I'm fine, stop it." She shuddered and tried to shake it off.

"Right. Afraid of bugs are you?" He cast a minor healing spell to calm her, taking a step back when she glared at him.

"I could kill Soris," Kallian muttered to herself. Pulling her helm off, she shook her hair out and ran her fingers through it. "Those things are disgusting! How many legs does a creature need? And _you_." She spun around to face Velanna. "That was one hell of a way for me to find out you can shape shift. I could have killed you!"

"You do not strike me as the type who would kill something that is defending you, even in the heat of battle." the elven mage observed, with no apology.

Kallian stared at Velanna for several seconds before finally shouting, "I need to know these things, for Maker's sake! Just...give me advance warning next time." She paused and twisted her hair up so she could put her helm back on. It was an excuse to give her time to calm down. When she was able to speak in a kinder tone, she asked, "Is everyone else okay?"

There were bruises, cuts, scrapes. Rosa and Lucius both had wounds from the grubs' claws. Anders healed everyone, giving the dogs mabari crunch cookies, and suggested the group find a place to rest for a while. Kallian began the search for Kal'Hirol's secret entrance in earnest.

Nathaniel found the hidden latch within the gaping maw of one of the stone carvings adorning the walls of the courtyard and called out to the others as a large portion of the wall before him slipped into the ground. They found themselves in a large antechamber, most of its ceiling in piles of rubble on the floor. There didn't appear to be a way into the fort save for a large hole someone, the darkspawn they assumed, had dug nearby. Deciding it was reasonably safe for their purposes, they closed themselves in. While Anders moved amongst them, healing wounds, they shed their gauntlets and helms. Leliana and Velanna began to prepare a light meal, and Zevran took Kallian aside.

"Are you sure you are all right?" He stroked her cheek lightly. "Remember what Petra said, tesora."

She nodded, letting a lungful of air out in a huff. "I'm okay, I am. I just remembered something Soris did to me as a child, and..." Zevran raised his brow questioningly, clearly wanting to know what, exactly, was going on. "It's stupid. He threw a couple really long centipedes into my hair when I was...four or five, I suppose. I couldn't get them out, and it..." She shuddered again and rolled her shoulders, trying to shake the feeling that something was crawling across her scalp and down her back. "Well, clearly it scarred me for life."

Zevran smiled, obviously trying to hold back a laugh. "I see. Then I hope we do not run into those creatures again."

Kallian snorted. "Somehow I think we'll be seeing more of them."

xXx

Fed, healed, and rested, the group gathered around the hole in the ground to determine the best course of action. Anders crouched down and conjured a spell wisp, sighing with some relief.

"The drop is only about six feet, I think. I can see stone and...wooden beams?"

Kallian was looking at the dogs when Leliana put words to her thoughts. "Our mabari friends can jump down, then, but how will we get them back up?"

Lucius moved to Kallian's side, as if to say he was going with her no matter what. She rubbed his head and smiled. "I'd think we'll be able to come back out the proper entrance, but we'll figure it out as we go. They likely won't appreciate being left behind-" The dogs barked in agreement. "And the dogs have spoken. You go first, Lucius."

After some consideration, prowling around the hole and peering into it, Lucius leapt down and barked back up to his pack members. Rosa followed, and one by one the others dropped down to the next level of the fort. Kallian looked around at the space they found themselves in. They were on uneven stone, and it looked as though the fort had been built around and over areas like this. The wooden beams supported the roof above them, which had been weakened when the darkspawn broke through the floor of the secret entrance. The ground sloped down and to their right, and the group followed a hallway to a doorway. Kallian pressed her ear to the door's keyhole, feeling the pull of darkspawn behind it, and strained to hear anything useful. Metal boots scraping on stone, swords clanging together, grunting.

Sigrun leaned in close to whisper, "That should be the main hall. Lots of darkspawn, and lots of pressure plates for traps. They have golems, too."

"Golems. Of course." _Why did I think this would be any different than the Deep Roads,_she thought, shaking her head. Motioning the others away from the door, she waited until they were gathered around and said, "Darkspawn, other side of the door. And golems."

Oghren snorted and slapped Nathaniel on the back. "Shoot the guy with the control rod."

Howe raised an eyebrow. "Control rod?"

"Fancy word for a stick, Howe. Commander, you want me 'n the dead guy to run in screamin' and killin' while the rest of ya follow behind shootin' and stabbin' and whatnot?"

Kallian couldn't help smiling. "I doubt we'll be able to sneak up on them, with that door to open. I think your suggestion is a good one. You two run in and distract the ones closest to the door. Velanna and Anders, fire and ice work well, as we've seen. Lucius and Rosa, guard our flanks. We'll start with bows and arrows," she pointed to Leliana and Nathaniel, "and use our blades if need be. Sigrun, you're familiar with the traps here, so perhaps you could take care of them, and Zevran will do what he does best."

Zevran flashed a brilliant smile that made her weak-kneed, and bowed with a flourish. "Your wish is our command."

"How do we kill a golem?" Anders asked, looking overwhelmed.

"In the Deep Roads, we found that freezing them slowed them down and made them just brittle enough that Oghren could knock their heads off or shatter them to bits."

The group broke and began to prepare for the fight ahead. Zevran went to Kallian's side, and they helped each other tighten the buckles of their armor. After a minute of silence, he caught her hand in his and squeezed it, regarding her with an enquiring look. She stepped closer to him and brought his hand to her lips, feeling more than a bit worried about him and Leliana. If either were to be tainted...she forced the thought away yet again and kissed Zevran's knuckles.

"You are concerned." he whispered.

"As always." she said with a little laugh. "This is business as usual, we've been here so many times before, but...I know we were dealing with the unknown during the Blight, so this situation isn't that much different, and yet it is. Darkspawn who can speak, think for themselves, and run experiments? _New_forms of darkspawn? My head is still spinning over it all."

She bit her lip and looked back at the others before continuing, "Wardens elsewhere have shown a complete lack of interest in the events here and may very well keep doing so. I am so...tired of feeling as though I have no idea what I'm doing. I feel badly that I continue to put you and Leliana in danger, even though you are both here voluntarily." She took a breath and Zevran raised a hand to stop her from talking.

"Kallian." Zevran cupped her cheek. "We fight by your side because it is the right thing to do. What you are doing here is for the benefit of all of Thedas. We know the risks we face, but we keep the rewards in mind. A better place for our son, indeed for all children, to grow up? No more darkspawn? Such things require sacrifice, it is inevitable, but we must not dwell on that fact."

She smiled and leaned in to kiss him. "Just...be careful." She knew it didn't need to be said, but couldn't help herself.

"I have much to live for, Kalli," he said with a wink as he placed a hand on her belly. "You know this. I will be careful."

Anders coughed, reminding them the rest of their party was ready and waiting a modest distance away, trying not to intrude upon their moment. Kallian cleared her throat and motioned to the door.

Sigrun stood ready to pull the door open; Oghren grinned at her and brandished his axe menacingly as he prepared to go into a berserker rage. The Legionnaire rolled her eyes and groaned, casting a quick glance at Kallian.

"Everybody ready?" Kallian whispered. The others nodded. Nocking an arrow into her bow, she motioned to Sigrun who pulled the door wide open in one swift movement.

Oghren and Justice charged through the door, bellowing war cries, their heavy blades cutting a path through the first group of darkspawn to attack them. Balls of fire and streams of frost shot past Kallian and her archers, making several darkspawn easy targets. Flights of stairs led down into the main hall, where more darkspawn awaited them. The noise in the large chamber rose to a fevered pitch. Blades clashed, war cries rang out, darkspawn screamed at them, the mabari barked and growled, magic crackled in the air, Sigrun shouted out the locations of traps to avoid until she could disarm them. Kallian found a comfortable rhythm with her bow and brought down several genlock. They moved forward into the main hall, pressing in on the last of the darkspawn, until finally the chamber was quiet once more. The golem master was dead, and they possessed the control rod. Inert golems stood in alcoves around the walls of the main hall and the group collectively sighed with relief that they had come in the secret entrance. Finding and saving Sigrun had been a stroke of good luck.

Most injuries were minor; Oghren had a gash along one cheek from an arrow, Velanna had a similar cut along her upper arm, and Zevran had a split lip. Sigrun, however, had taken a hard blow and fractured two ribs, which would need more time to heal. Anders suggested they all relax while he tended to the wounded. Zevran and Kallian sat down together on a pile of stone rubble and shared some water while they waited.

In spite of his anxiety, Anders moved amongst his companions easily while maintaining a light-hearted banter with them, and the sense of camaraderie amongst them brought a measure of relief to Kallian.

"My fireballs are bigger than yours," Velanna said as Anders worked on her arm, her tone carrying more mirth than menace.

A smile pulled at the corner of his mouth. "It's not the _size_that counts, Velanna."

She raised an eyebrow. "Did they tell you that in your Circle? They were trying not to hurt your feelings."

Anders clapped a hand to his chest, a look of mock surprise on his face. "The Circle _lied _to me? Andraste's sword, my world is falling apart! I have been unmanned!"

The others laughed and Sigrun's giggle turned to a groan. With an apology, Anders put a hand on her side and began healing her ribs. When he was satisfied that he had done all he could for their new companion, he announced they could continue on after she'd had a rest and some food and drink. Oghren was snoring loudly, a mabari on either side of him sleeping just as easily. Zevran put an arm around Kallian and pulled her to his side, bringing a hand up to stroke her cheek.

"Nap, if you can, my dear Warden," he whispered into her ear.

She wouldn't have thought she could sleep, and yet within a minute she was drifting off, the warmth of Zevran's hand against her cheek soothing her. When he awoke her again within half an hour, she felt reasonably refreshed, although her body ached for a real bed. Keeping that thought to herself, she checked on her companions one by one before pushing them forward, deeper into the fortress.

xXx

Kallian found Sigrun to be an amusing character. She was generally 'perky', as Nathaniel pointed out more than once, and she had a strange sense of humor. She could be by turns overly dramatic or light and comedic, and there was always a sparkle of mischief in her eye. There were times when Kallian sensed sadness behind those twinkling eyes, brief moments when Sigrun grieved for her Legion companions, but they passed quickly. Sigrun's cheerful and upbeat demeanor seemed as much a defence mechanism as Anders's humor or Velanna's frosty and detached attitude, and was preferable to moodiness and drinking. Kallian decided she would offer the dwarf a position in the Wardens, given that her future seemed otherwise bleak. Could a lone dwarf survive in the Deep Roads? Was there any hope she could make it back to Orzammar on her own? Kallian thought of herself as optimistic, but had little faith in Sigrun's ability to survive on her own in spite of how well she fought. There was little sense in allowing a potentially good recruit to slip through her fingers.

They were going down, deeper into the fortress, winding through hallways and down stairs, when they heard the clashing of swords. Shortly thereafter, they came across the spirits of dwarves and darkspawn from ages past, fighting a battle that had perhaps been raging for several ages. Sigrun watched, eyes wide with fascination.

"I've never seen anything like this," she whispered. "They say the memories of the stone are forever. Is this what they mean?" Kallian shrugged, looking to Oghren. She had seen restless spirits in the Deep Roads, and elsewhere, too, and had no explanation.

She urged her companions onward, through the sparring spirits. The group of Wardens moved into another large chamber, a raised stage lined with crude, spiked shields at its center. A dwarven spirit was giving a stirring speech to others, rallying them to fight against the darkspawn. The thought of spending an eternity fighting the same battle over and over again did not sit well with Kallian and she was glad to move on.

Further on, a male spirit ran out of a nearby room to a female standing before Kallian, grabbing the woman's forearms. It appeared they were a couple, "They're gone! Everyone's gone! They're abandoning the thaig." the man said. "We have to follow them. I'm not going to stay here and get eaten by those things."

"But...but this is our home. We can't survive out there."

"We won't survive here." He pulled the woman into an embrace and they disappeared.

Kallian stood rooted to the spot, notions of what had become of this couple filling her mind, none of it good. The sting of tears prickled at her eyes.

"Commander?" Sigrun put a hand on her arm.

"I...It's tragic. They were abandoned, unable to defend themselves...I can only begin to imagine what it must have been like, trying to escape."

Sigrun nodded, trying to remain positive. "These people didn't make it, Commander, but lots of them did get back to Orzammar."

Kallian sighed and straightened up, rolling her shoulders. The others were waiting for orders; Zevran smiled at her from the edge of the group. Bolstered once again, she nodded to the room off to their right, where the spirit had come from. Inside, they found some furniture, two skeletons, rune tracings, and ancient armor not worth taking.

They continued to meet with groups of spirits, who were either fighting darkspawn or talking amongst themselves. These scenes began to paint a rather unpleasant picture for Kallian and the others. Many people were simply abandoned because they were casteless. Others, like the man whose journal she'd found, stayed to help them organize a defense, even though it was clear it had only held off their inevitable destruction. She nearly wept when they came upon the ghost of a daughter begging her mother not to leave home to fight. The daughter sobbed, the mother tried to calm her.

"If we do this, the ancestors will look kindly on us and forgive us." the woman argued gently. Kallian bit her lip and turned away, trying to ignore the immense sadness that threatened to overtake her. It angered her to think it was possible that these people had been thrown away, left behind to slow down the encroaching hoard so that the others could escape.

She was quickly distracted by another fight, and threw everything she had into it, as if she could avenge the dwarves of Kal'Hirol now, ages later. A talking darkspawn, sporting the new 'uniform' of dark armor with red acents, led the attack against them, confirming that there was something within the ruins the monsters wished to protect. Kallian could only assume Jukka's dying words were true; the darkspawn were breeding an army here, and that sense of something big she had been feeling was even more unsettling. Broodmothers could be mountainous in size and shape. When they had killed the beasts, she announced they would take a half hour break and sat with Zevran, reading the journal she found, written by somene named Dailan. The contents did nothing to improve her mood. As they prepared to move on once again, she was determined to send her findings here to the Shaperate in Orzammar. The dwarves who died here would be remembered.

xXx

If Kallian hadn't seen it, she wouldn't have believed it. As they entered Kal'Hirol's Trade Quarter, they saw a group of darkspawn, led by another talker, fighting the defending darkspawn. They were looking for something, or more likely _someone _Kallian thought, called the Lost, and they, too, were heading deeper into the fort. She exchanged glances with the her companions when the invaders left the area.

"Okay, this is something new, right? Darkspawn fighting each other? I've never seen that before. Sigrun?"

The dwarf shook her head. "No, Commander, that _is_new."

"Civil war, of a sorts," Nathaniel mused.

Oghren let out a gruff laugh, pointing to where the darkspawn had disappeared. "Heh, it'll make our job easier if we just stay a few steps behind them."

Kallian clapped a hand on his shoulder. "Let's do that and see what happens."

xXx

The invading darkspawn were single-minded in their purpose, and it was very clear they had a purpose. Initially, they paid no attention to Kallian and her companions as they fought the defending darkspawn through Kal'Hirol's Trade Quarter. But when they had finally eliminated their targets, they turned on the Wardens' party. When all the darkspawn were finally dead, Kallian leaned up against a dwarven crate and caught her breath. The metallic tang on her tongue was more pronounced here. The other party members noticed it too, and it was Anders who was drawn to the eerie glow along the perimeter of the room. There were regular gaps between the wall and the floor around the entire Trade Quarter, open to a level below. Lyrium grew in abundance below them, its blue whorls and cones spiraling over the ground as far as the eye could see.

"Ooh, lyrium," Anders whispered.

Kallian blew out a puff of air. "Wow, that's...just...beautiful."

Anders nodded. "The Chantry has a monopoly on all the lyrium the dwarves mine. They kill anyone who tries to get around it." His tone had a bitter edge to it, but he shrugged and was smiling again. "It can be dangerous, so we need to be careful. The dust in the air will be worse the deeper we go. We should try to get this over with as soon as possible."

"What are the side effects of exposure?" she asked, looking around the room as she put a hand on her stomach.

"Velanna and I likely won't need to take as many lyrium potions for the duration of this trip, if any. As for the rest of you, well...Dworkin's been exposed to it for a lot longer, so don't worry about going crazy, but you'll probably feel light headed, goofy, that sort of thing. As though you're drunk, but more alert and less slobbery. As long as we don't get stuck down here, we'll be fine. Baby, too."

She thought about that for a minute. "Well, we'd better find this...breeding ground...and get out of here, then." She thought she might be sick. _Broodmothers. Maker help me_, she prayed silently to herself once again.

xXx

Kallian hadn't expected to witness Dailan's death. The ghost of an ogre had the dwarf injured and trapped, and jumped on Dailan, killing him with a sickening crunching sound. Kallian clapped a hand over her mouth to stop herself from screaming. She knew the man had probably met a violent end, there was no other kind at the hands of the darkspawn, but to actually see it happen..._And there are his bones_, she thought, seeing a dwarven skeleton, broken sword and crushed armor on the ground. Reading his journal and seeing his memories, learning how he had stayed behind to help the casteless arm and defend themselves, she had grown to respect the man. She might have liked him had she known him.

"Commander," Sigrun whispered as the spirits faded away. She was crouched by a large stone tablet with carving tools in one hand as she brushed dust and stone chips away with the other. "'May the stone remember the defenders of Kal'Hirol, who were born casteless and died warriors.'" Sigrun read the tablet.

Gasping, the young dwarf looked up at Kallian. "'Died warriors'? He...he wanted them to be remembered as warriors. Warrior caste. And look, he carved their names into the table. All of them. We can't just leave this here. We have to find some way to honor the memory of those who died here."

Nathaniel crouched down beside her, digging through his pack. "We cannot carry the tablet out with us, but we can make note of where it is," he mumbled, "and take a rubbing of it in the meantime." He produced a bundle of parchment sheets, a package of charcoal, and drawing pencils.

Sigrun's eyes lit up. "I've heard of this. Show me how to do it! Please?"

Howe's lip twitched, a smile threatening to grace his face. "Watch closely and be careful."

The charcoal rubbing took several minutes and a dozen or more sheets of parchment. The map was a simpler affair. Nathaniel recalled their path with remarkable accuracy and had Oghren and Sigrun to help fill in any details he missed. Satisfied that they could direct others to this part of the Trade Quarter, they picked up their things and began moving again.

Kallian was beginning to believe this would go on forever. She was learning things she wasn't sure she wanted to know. The grub-like beasts, for instance, grew incredibly large once they had eaten. This made them all the more deadly, but Velanna and Anders surprised her by collaborating on a fire spell that could turn an entire room into a whirling inferno. Velanna cast a barrier over the entrances, and within minutes it was over.

Oghren laughed loudly. "Look at that. We didn't have to lift a finger and there's roasted meat for the walk."

"By the Creators, I think I am going to be sick, you repulsive little man." Velanna stalked ahead of the group, muttering to herself.

xXx

Kal'Hirol was one horror after another and Kallian was exhausted, mentally and physically. They had spent at least an hour clearing out room after room of grubs and the children who had feasted on invading darkspawn. That had been difficult. The more mature of the beasts could stand on their back legs and attack with the rest of their legs and claws, and when they stood, they were at least as tall as the elves and dwarves in the party. Nearly everyone was injured one way or another. Scratches, cuts, deeper wounds from being stabbed at, and, in Kallian's case, a turned ankle. Anders's abilities were put to the test, but it was clear Velanna was becoming more adept at the healing arts as well, and her assistance helped a great deal.

Getting to the lower reaches of the fortress provided some relief, but it didn't last long. After following a long tunnel, Kallian turned a corner and found herself rooted to the spot with fear. Mouth, arms, and legs ceased working. She thought it was a miracle her mind was still functioning, or perhaps it wasn't and she was hallucinating. The scene before her was unbelievable.

An inferno golem, as big as the largest ogre she'd ever seen, stood within a circular chamber, an invading darkspawn in its hand. A defending darkspawn stood before them.

"The Architect sends many but does not come himself," the beast shouted at his prisoner. "He is a coward! I will kill you and he will know he has failed to destroy the Lost. He will know that the Mother will tear him apart!"

The golem tore its prisoner in half and threw him to the ground. The Lost sniffed the air and turned to where Kallian and her team were hiding.

"Who comes now? I can feel you, but you are no darkspawn! What trickery is he planning?" He stepped forward, pointing at the group of companions. "You will die, as all who serve the Architect will die! The Mother demands it!"

Kallian had but a moment to process what the Lost was saying, to understand that she and the Architect might be allies, before the room erupted with noise.

"He's a mage!" Anders shouted, shooting a stream of lightning at the Lost.

"Take him out!" Kallian screamed, taking a few steps back to nock an arrow into her bow. What good it would do remained to be seen.

Velanna shouted to Anders, something about a force field, and the golem began to slow down until it was frozen in place, a shimmering field of light surrounding it. Justice, Oghren, and Sigrun descended upon the Lost, each taking turns at it while the others dodged his spells. The monster bellowed with rage, but was soon subdued and killed.

The force field Velanna and Anders had created was fading. "Snow and ice!" he called out to her. A sheen of frost appeared on everyone's blades.

Velanna conjured a ball of frost and shot it at the golem; Anders created a small blizzard around its head.

Sigrun called out to the group, "Don't let it curl up on itself to regenerate its fire! They let out a huge burst of fire that'll knock you on your ass!"

The golem sent a stream of fire at the dwarf and she ducked under one of the many waterfalls that spilled out of the wall into the chamber floor. A flare of strange magic filled the room and an inferno spun around them, heating the air. Everyone ran for the cover of water.

"Get it closer to a waterfall!" Nathaniel shouted out.

As much as possible, they tried to steer the golem toward water. Whenever they were successful, steam filled the air, making it difficult to see, but the monstrosity slowed ever so slightly. Velanna decided to try a different tactic, changing into a giant spider to shoot silk at the golem's legs. She skittered around it, winding more and more rope around its legs, trying to trip it up. That, combined with the ice spells, frosted weapons, and frost bombs slowly turned the battle against the golem. It wasn't easy, but it was finally over. Nearly everyone collapsed to the floor. Kallian checked on the mabari, giving each one a biscuit, before she spread herself out on the floor, too, panting heavily.

"Did we...just do...that? Kill an inferno...golem? Or are we dead?"

Zevran, who was at her side, rolled over and propped himself up on one elbow. He looked maddeningly neat and tidy for someone who had just run around in circles for half an hour, dodging fire, but fatigue was getting the better of him.

"I assure you, my dear, we are very much alive." He kissed her and rubbed her cheek, then settled back on the ground. "I will be right here."

Anders's voice drifted across the room. "Anyone hurt?"

Leliana mumbled that her lungs hurt, others began to speak up, and soon enough the room was filled with the energy of healing magic. Velanna and Anders tested the water in the chamber and happily declared it free of the darkspawn taint. They could fill their water skins and even bathe if they desired. Kallian very much desired a bath and the group began to make arrangements to clean up, using blankets from their sleeping rolls to provide privacy.

Sigrun was anxious to keep moving, and Kallian couldn't blame her. She knew her fellow Wardens were as aware as she was that they were close to the broodmothers. Every inch of her skin was tingling most unpleasantly with the knowledge that darkspawn were close. If they weren't here, they couldn't be far away. Her stomach turned, and she wondered if she could do this, but she caught sight of Zevran watching her and felt movement in her belly.

Her husband, child, friends, and fellow countrymen were the reasons she was doing this and she would find the strength to continue for as long as was necessary.

* * *

**A/N:** At long last, an update to this story! RL, Skyrim, and now Mass Effect 1/2/3 have distracted me. This chapter could have gone on forever, but had to end somewhere, and this seemed like a good spot. I have posted this without the assistance of my beta, so please forgive (and point out) any errors you may see. Thanks as always to Bioware and to Zute, Zevgirl, Mille Libri, and everyone else who reads, reviews, and lists this. I do love hearing from you, so please feel free to comment/review. Cheers!


	21. Nothing New

**Nothing New**

Kallian crouched down and pressed her back against a wall, straining to see through the shimmering fog of dirt and lyrium dust that filled the chamber. She could feel her Warden companions around the room and knew the others were nearby. Leliana was muttering a prayer to Andraste, Sigrun was talking to the dogs, who were panting heavily, and Zevran was by Kallian's side, having just tied a kerchief around her face to help filter the dust. She was exhausted, every part of her body felt as though it was on fire from the paces she had been through, and she wanted this to end. Her confidence was waning.

What should have been a five five-minute walk at best down the hall had become a struggle for survival and this supposed breeding chamber was no different. Their every step had been dogged by darkspawn, grubs, and the broodmothers' tentacles, the walls and floor exploding as tentacles burst through, writhing about, searching for them. If they stood in one place too long, they risked getting hit or grabbed, crushed, or thrown against a wall, and most of the party members were running out of energy. Anders and Velanna, however, had hit their stride and exceeded it, their powers magnified by the very air around them. Bursts of fire and lightning illuminated the cloud of lyrium particles, making the entire room shimmer.

"Ah ha!" Anders shouted with nearly maniacal glee.

Velanna shrieked and Kallian thought she heard rocks falling into a deep hole. She stood up and moved forward cautiously. There was indeed a large pit in the center of the room, and Velanna had almost walked into it, but Nathaniel caught her arm just in time.

"Look out, my lady." Nathaniel's deep voice rose above the din. "There is a well in the middle of the room."

"Let go of me. I'm fine." Velanna protested. Kallian noticed the usually prickly mage didn't put much distance between herself and Nathaniel in spite of her objection to his help.

The rest of the party gravitated toward the hole to look into the well. It easier to see here, and far below them, they saw three broodmothers writhing in a horrid looking muck. Justice was unaffected, but the living members of the party stepped back, gagging at the stench that drifted up from below. The foul creatures were living in their own waste. Even with the handkerchief over her nose and mouth, Kallian struggled to keep the contents of her stomach down.

"Oh, Maker!" she gasped, moving back further.

As she did, she saw a large chain nearby that hung down from the ceiling into the hole in the floor. Risking the stench and broodmothers, she darted forward and looked down into the pit. There were four chains in all, one at each corner of the hole, and at the end of each was what appeared to be an enormous orb of lyrium.

"Look!" she shouted, a new energy surging through her. "Warriors, mages, break the chains! Archers, Sigrun, Zev, use poisoned arrows and bombs on those beasts. Lucius, Rosa, watch our backs."

Her newfound strength energized the others and they shifted to do as she ordered. Anders hit the chain links nearest to him with alternating freezing spells and outright attacks with his sword; Oghren and Justice attacked a second chain, each taking turns swinging their blades at it. Leliana and Nathaniel began sending a barrage of arrows covered with concentrated deathroot into the pit below them; Sigrun, Zevran, and Kallian each tossed a bomb at the broodmothers. With the stone floor of the chamber now completely compromised by the broodmothers themselves, Velanna was able to summon tree roots into the well to stab and claw at the beasts.

With a mighty roar, Oghren swung his battle axe, finally breaking a chain link. The orb it held plummeted into into the pit below where it shattered, sending shards in every direction. The broodmothers screamed with rage, their injuries slowing them down. Excitement and new hope flooded the weary companions and they focussed their efforts on the remaining chain links. Mere moments earlier, Kallian had doubted their chances, but now she could see the end in sight. A second chain broke, and finally a third, and as the sound of shattering lyrium and shrieking faded, the only noise they could hear was their labored breathing.

They were silent for several minutes as they caught their breath. Dust and debris settled and Kallian took a moment to ensure everyone was okay. Aside from bruises, cuts, scrapes, and sore muscles too numerous to count, it didn't appear that anyone was seriously injured.

Sigrun was the first to speak. "We did it. If the rest of the Legion were alive, I know...I know they'd honor you in some way."

Kallian put her hand on the dwarf's shoulder. "I'm sorry so many had to die."

Sigrun nodded, a sad expression on her face. "I used to wish I could get away from the others. Now I'm all alone and I just want them back. Silly, isn't it?" She shook off the melancholy and frowned. "What's strange is that we seem to be caught between two factions of darkspawn. I've never heard of such a thing. The darkspawn are vicious and are always fighting amongst themselves, but for there to be two organized factions...this is something else."

Kallian frowned, thinking back on all that had happened over the past few days. "I noticed that, too, and it worries me."

"Good, so it isn't just me. Something has changed with the darkspawn and I don't think I like it." Sigrun began dusting herself off. "Well, it's something to ponder, especially when you need to be reminded impending doom is always right around the corner."

Kallian got the impression Sigrun was getting ready to leave, the way she was adjusting her armor and weapons. "What will you do now, Sigrun?"

The dwarf replied with a cheer that didn't quite reach her eyes. "Oh, probably disappear into the bowels of the Deep Roads never to be seen again. One of the good things about the Deep Roads is you never run out of darkspawn to fight."

"Why don't you consider coming with me?" Kallian offered. The other Wardens were nodding their approval.

"Go with you? But that would go against my vow...and my plan to disappear into the deep, unmourned and forgotten."

Kallian couldn't help letting out a short laugh. "I'm recruiting Grey Wardens. Join us."

Sigrun looked at Oghren. "Be a Grey Warden? Is that even allowed? Can you be part of the Legion and be a Grey Warden?"

He shrugged. "Eh, you'll still fight darkspawn and probably die doin' it."

Sigrun considered the possibilities. "And I'd be more effective at killing darkspawn, wouldn't I? Ha! How can I say no to this?" Her eyes sparkled again, and she looked resolved. "I will follow you. You seem an all right sort, and I'm better off with you at my back than alone. Let's go, then. The darkspawn await!"

They needed to rest, but thinking back on Anders's warning about exposure to lyrium, Kallian agreed that leaving Kal'Hirol immediately was the best course of action. Nathaniel pointed across the room to another doorway where they could see a flight of stairs.

"Commander, that looks to be a way out."

Kallian made sure the others were ready, concern for her mages renewed. Flickers of lightning danced along Anders's armor and Velanna all but vibrated with energy, whips of hair stirring about her face as though she stood in a draft. Both mages seemed too alert, too jumpy. Their excess mana would be put to use healing soon enough, but she knew they would quickly tire. It was definitely time to go.

xXx

6 Haring, 9:30

They resurfaced within an hour and were greeted with cloudy skies and light rain. Kallian guessed it to be early morning, which meant they'd spent roughly a day and a half underground. It would take that much time again to return to Vigil's keep. She looked for Anders and Velanna and saw that they were starting to look more weary than the others. Nathaniel was walking close to Velanna, ready to offer a hand each time she stumbled, which was happening more often as time went on, and Anders was lagging behind the group.

"We'll stop at the farmhouse to rest," she announced. No one voiced any objections and the group continued on to the main road.

The farmhouse was as they had left it and in spite of how tired they were, everyone set to a task. Before too long, they had water to wash with, rabbits and root vegetables to cook, a pot of tea, and a fire to warm the house. After they had all washed up, Zevran and Leliana made stew and the others cleaned their armor and weapons. Finally, they all sat down together to eat. Weariness kept the chatter to a minimum.

Something felt different to Kallian, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it. She closed her eyes as she inhaled the fragrant steam of her tea, trying to relax. The buzzing in her veins wasn't as strong now as it had been in the depths of Kal'Hirol, a pleasant thing indeed, and she realized that this was what was bothering her. It felt as though the darkspawn were moving away, but she didn't think they were going far. She opened her eyes and looked around the kitchen.

"Wardens, does it feel as though the darkspawn are retreating?" The others exchanged glances and the room went still.

Nathaniel nodded slowly. "Retreating to regroup, no doubt."

The others mumbled in agreement, and Kallian knew he was right. The darkspawn would be back, and she wondered how long it would take them to recover from this blow. _How deeply did we cut them with our victory? How large is their army?_

xXx

Kallian and Zevran took the uppermost room in the house once again, dropping their bags at the foot of the bed.

"Why don't you get ready for bed, while I build a small fire," Zevran suggested, motioning to the bed.

Kallian sat and started running through a list of things to do upon returning to the keep. _Prepare a Joining ceremony for Sigrun and arrange accommodations for her, check in with the new recruits, get caught up with Varel, Mistress Woolsey, and Captain Garevel, deal with the prisoners...no, Nathaniel will handle that._ That brought her thoughts to Bann Esmerelle and the injury to her ear. Her hand drifted up to touch the new dressings Anders had put on in Kal'Hirol. He told her she could remove them entirely in another day or two. Kallian hadn't given her ear much consideration at all while battle kept her so overwhelmingly preoccupied, and much to her surprise her emotions weren't as raw when she did finally think of it again. _What's done is done_.

She was pulled out of her thoughts as the fire jumped to life, and she watched Zevran fan the flames. His muscles flexed and a familiar longing rushed through her. He pushed a lock of hair behind his ear and her pulse quickened. Kallian slid off the bed and crouched behind him, running her hands up his back and over his shoulders. The feel of him beneath her hands, strong, alive, and so warm, filled her with desire and she sighed.

"Oh? What is this?" he asked her with a grin as he settled back against her body.

"Mmm. Foreplay." Kallian traced his ear with her tongue, delighting in the way he sucked in his breath and reached a hand back to slide his fingers into her hair.

Zevran's touch sent another thrill of pleasure through Kallian and she shivered with anticipation. "Been ... too ... long," she whispered between kisses down his neck.

He moved suddenly, turning and pulling her up to her feet, his arms wrapping around her as he kissed her. His hands grasped her behind, pressing her to him, and she could feel his arousal building. She shifted her hips against him, imagining their naked bodies pressed together and her excitement continued to build. They became a tangle of limbs, pushing and pulling at each other's clothing, until they collapsed onto the bed, naked and laughing.

The horrors of the past few days were quickly forgotten as Kallian immersed herself in the moment. Zevran smelled of leather and steel, soap and sweat. These were the scents she had come to associate with him, and even now, in this strange farmhouse full of its own odors, she felt at home, secure. She took him in her mouth, groaning with pleasure at the familiar sweet and salty tang of his flesh, and gave herself to him fully. They made love slowly, gently, and fell asleep in each others' arms.

xXx

_Anger filled her, drove her deeper into madness, and she screamed with rage. The Father was to blame; he had taken Kal'Hirol. But all was not lost, mother had her tricks. _

Kallian sat upright, gasping for breath. Zevran stirred, reaching out to rest a hand on her back and she could hear Lucius snoring softly in the corner. The coals in the fireplace were still glowing faintly, and the familiar smell of sex lingered in the room. Still in the grips of her nightmare, Kallian found little comfort in these things.

"What is it, tesora?" Zevran asked, his voice groggy with sleep.

She shook her head, as though that would clear away the images that still haunted her. "Darkspawn." _Who is the Father, the Architect? Two factions, one led by the Mother, and the other...by the Architect?_" Nothing new." Even as she said it, she didn't believe it. Anxiety pooled in her belly.

"Come," he commanded, pulling her back down to his side. "Try to sleep."

She did as he asked, curling herself around him, but getting back to sleep was difficult. Something was about to happen and not knowing what or when was frustrating.

* * *

A/N: My thanks to Bioware for letting me play, and to my readers for being so patient! As always, my beta, Mille Libri gets kudos, Zute and Zevgirl get a shout out for being my "Plussers" and providing so much support, and I owe a special nod to Kainen-no-Kitsune for the little kick in the pants a while back! Thank you to reviewers "Guest", Kalikastorm, and Xxalissaamaranthxx. Please do read and review; you know I love to hear from you!

You might notice that this chapter is shorter than most. If you're following me in particular, you'll see I've been writing up a Mass Effect storm. That project started as an experiment in writing shorter chapters and posting more often, and it certainly worked there. Hopefully, that will translate into more posting here, too. Thank you for stopping in. Cheers, Biff


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